Post by dsb on Dec 18, 2016 2:39:19 GMT
With her girlfriend out buying some last minute Christmas gifts, Camille Cosworth sat at her living room table with a mug in one hand and a fountain pen in the other, feeling pleasantly buzzed from the eggnog.
CAMILLE COSWORTH:
In front of her was a massive leather bound book containing the complete works of Edgar Allen Poe, in which she had written a message on the inside cover using her best penmanship:
To the new Queen of the Madhouse,
Long may she reign!
Yours truly,
Camille
She could not truthfully call herself friends or even acquaintances with the Raven, but she still enjoyed watching Lemarchand smother out the former Queen of the Madhouse, and this was simultaneously a token of her appreciation, a house warming gift, and a Christmas present.
After taking a few seconds to admire her handiwork, Camille freshened her cup and went about examining some of the other holiday presents she had prepared.
For Massachusetts football fan Maggie Connor, there was an official New England Patriots football that was deflated to precisely two PSI below the legal limit.
For bartender and mercenary Cassandra Vale, there was a Louisville Slugger with several large, rusty nails haphazardly hammered into the barrel. In a moment of inspiration, Camille had christened the weapon “Nail Bat.”
And for very, very bad girl Adelaide Brewster, there was a bag of charcoal briquettes.
Snickering at her own cleverness, Cosworth drained her eggnog in three big gulps and was about to go for another refill when the door to the condo swung open and Yoona Park walked in carrying a couple of large boxes.
YOONA PARK:
“Yoooonnaaaa, daaaarrrrrling…” Camille lilted. “Didya get all the presents?”
Yoona narrowed her eyes and asked, “Have you been drinking?”
“Had some eggnog. Just a cup or two. Or three. Or seven.”
Park cocked her head quizzically to one side and held that pose for a few seconds before finally saying, “The eggnog was non-alcoholic.”
“Oh,” Camille said bluntly, immediately sobering up from her placebo inebriation.
Yoona just shook her head as she placed her load on a table, then fished out a USB stick and handed it to Cosworth.
“That’s for Lenore. All four seasons and one hundred episodes of That’s So Raven.”
Camille opened her mouth as if to say something, then wisely decided against it. Park’s brain often operated on a much weirder wavelength, and to try to follow that runaway train of logic was folly of the highest order.
“This is for Shitty McShithead,” Park said as she opened one of the boxes she carried in, revealing an erotic cake decorated like a woman’s backside. Also in the box was a bottle of cheap tequila and a placard reading, "THINGS YOU LIKE HAVING IN YOUR FACE."
The tequila made Cosworth cringe, as that particular fiasco had gotten Yoona a hefty fine and a ten day suspension. Even now, Park was still in the doghouse with management, as evidenced by the talented Korean being conspicuously absent from the upcoming Rookie of the Year tournament. Yoona had acted like she didn’t want to participate in the first place, although it was clear to Camille that her girlfriend was actually incensed at being left out.
“And THIS…” Park said as she opened the second box. “This is for my Girl of Tomorrow and the future Rookie of the Year...”
From the box she pulled out a pair of royal blue shorts with electric green trim, a racerback sports bra in the same color scheme, and a matching pair of low-cut, laceless wrestling shoes.
“Go ahead, babe. Try them on.”
Shrugging out of her bathrobe, Cosworth slipped into her new gear and found that everything fit her like a glove. The top exposed exactly the maximum amount of cleavage she was comfortable with while leaving her sculpted midriff completely bare, the tight-fitting bottoms extended about halfway down her thighs with the waist band coming up an inch short of her belly button, and the wrestling shoes came up to just below her ankle bones to minimize weight while still providing good traction and cushioning for her spectacular leaps. Most impressively, the material was very elastic and durable while still letting her skin breathe so easily that it felt like she was wearing almost nothing at all.
Park grinned and let out a sharp wolf-whistle. “You like? I like. I like a lot.”
“Yoona… W-when…?”
“I shopped around online last week and got this commissioned from some specialty fabric shop,” Yoona said. “I know you want to dress like you’re just one of the fans, but come on Cam, we both know that’s bullshit. You’re the Paragon of Hope, not the Paragon of Love Handles. Besides, you were always overheating like you were going to blow the fuck up at any moment with your tights and t-shirt combo. This gear is made from some ultra-permeable, high-tech fabric which should help fix that problem.”
Camille gave her girlfriend a hug and a kiss, and then a terrible realization dawned upon her.
“Umm… I, uhhh, I didn’t get you anything so thoughtful,” she said sheepishly.
Cosworth went to her side of the coat closet, retrieved a book she had hidden there, and gave it to Yoona.
“Err… Merry Christmas!”
Park arched an eyebrow as she read the title out loud, “Suplexes for Dummies.”
“It was a two-for-one deal when I bought my Korean for Dummies book,” Camille explained ruefully. “I, umm, I didn’t know what to get for the girl who has everything.”
“I don’t have a pony,” Yoona said flatly. “You could have gotten me a pony.”
Camille groaned, “I don’t mean you literally have everything. I was just trying to say how you already have all the stuff you want with a cute reference to a famous Superman story. You know, like how Girl of Tomorrow is a play on Man of Tomorrow?”
A puzzled look came over Park’s face and then she said, “I don’t think Superman has a pony either...”
Cosworth took a sharp inhale of breath through her teeth, and once again managed to suppress the urge to say something.
“Wait, shit, is that what you think Girl of Tomorrow means?”
“Is it not?”
“Is your mom named MARTHAAAAAA!!!?”
“No. No, she’s not,” Camille sighed in defeat. “So then what does Girl of Tomorrow mean?”
“It means… umm...” a wry smile spread across Yoona’s face as she hesitated a second. “It means whatever makes you feel like a badass, Cam.”
Even though she wasn’t quite satisfied with that cryptic answer, Cosworth gave her girlfriend a peck on the cheek. “I love the outfit, Yoona. I’ll give it a try when I’m sparring with Syd tomorrow.”
Park suddenly perked up. After a little cajoling from Camille, she had given her girlfriend her blessing to train with Deschain, and Cosworth had been sparring with Sydney twice a week ever since in order to prepare for the rookie tournament. Now at the mention of the Technical Marvel, the gears in Yoona’s head started churning.
“How is the old cougar these days? Is she still any good, or has Father Time rendered her toothless?” she asked.
“Ohhh man, is she still any good?!” Camille enthusiastically blurted out. “Haha! Syd’s the best wrestler I’ve ever --”
She abruptly cut herself off when she realized what she was saying, and more importantly, who she was saying it to. Park looked neutral and expressionless, and while anyone else would mistake that for calm, Cosworth knew her girlfriend well enough to recognize that this was Yoona’s furious face.
“Sorry,” she said meekly as she examined the tops of her new wrestling shoes.
“Sorry for what?” the Korean spat.
Camille didn't answer, as she knew that anything she said would only stoke Yoona’s anger. An awkward silence fell over the room for nearly a minute before Park spoke again.
“Even better than Connor?” Yoona asked, the almost lyrical inflection and cadence in her voice a reassuring sign that her irritation had mostly subsided.
“Maggie is strong, fast, and skilled -- that I know how to approach at least,” Cosworth replied. “With Syd though, it's like I'm in control one second and then I'm getting twisted in five different directions the next. I don't even know what the heck happened or what I did wrong until she talks me through it step by step while watching the replay.”
Park considered this for a moment before asking, “Have you beaten her in sparring yet?”
Camille shook her head.
“Has anyone else?”
Camille shook her head again, “Not that I know of.”
Yoona grinned like the Cheshire Cat, “Excellent.”
“I know what you're thinking and I --” Cosworth hesitated before finishing her thought, “-- I don't want you to wrestle Syd.”
“What.”
The anger was back in Park’s voice.
“Yoona, with the way things went down the first time, no matter who wins --”
“I’ll win,” Yoona growled.
Camille sighed helplessly, “It’s not going to be a dignified victory, and I’m worried this will poison my relationship with Sydney. I really enjoy training with her and I don't want you to --”
“What the hell, Cam?! You're taking her side?!
“I’m not taking anyone’s side --”
“WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU?! YOU SHOULD BE TAKING MY SIDE!” Park suddenly bellowed as she punched her left hand through the drywall, violently bringing silence to the room as her girlfriend looked on with mouth agape.
After several seconds, Yoona gingerly extracted her fist -- now bleeding from a two inch shard of plasterboard embedded between her knuckles -- and let out an exhausted sigh.
“Cam, I’m sorry. I’m just -- I’m just incredibly frustrated. I look at you and I see how far you’ve come already in this company, and ninety nine percent of me is just overjoyed and happy because you’re an amazing person and you work so hard and you deserve all the good things in this world.”
Yoona picked the shrapnel out of her hand and continued talking, “The other one percent of me wants what you have. And if you call me selfish you’re probably right, but I think I deserve it too. Maybe I shouldn’t be at the head of the table yet, but at least I should have a seat at the goddamn table, you know? I gave Dare a good run, and I had Belle dead to rights if it weren’t for that fucking ref, and now they’re telling me I can’t even get a shot at rookie of the year? What the fuck is that shit?”
Cosworth grabbed a towel from the table and started tending to her girlfriend’s hand while the Korean kept speaking, “Beating Deschain would have let me write my own ticket, because God knows I’m getting fuck-all from the front office. And I know I can beat her too. As far as I’m concerned, I’m two and three against her, not zero and one. So Cam, please, I want this. I need this. But I can’t -- I won’t -- do this without you in my corner.”
Camille took some time to gather her thoughts and said, “I get it, Yoona. I really do. I wish I could do for you what you’ve done for me --”
“You know, it’d be nice if you would fangirl over me the way you just did over Deschain,” Yoona quietly interrupted.
Cosworth ran a hand over her face and groaned, “Okay. Okay, that's fair. And I believe you when you tell me you’ll win but it's just that… it's just… ugh… you know what? Let me talk to Syd about it first, okay? You can be rather… abrasive, and I think this needs a more diplomatic touch.”
“You’ll let me fight her then?”
Camille nodded, “Who knows if Sydney’s going to want to keep sparring with me afterwards, but if it means that much to you -- well, that's a risk I'm willing to take. I know you'd do the same for me…”
Yoona kissed her girlfriend on the forehead and smiled. “Thanks, babe. This almost makes up for your shitty Christmas present!”
“Oh, quit your whining! I’ll get you a pony next Christmas. What breed do you want?”
“Whatever breed is most delicious.”
Cosworth rolled her eyes and playfully smacked her girlfriend on the side of the head with the Suplex for Dummies book. With any luck, some of the much needed knowledge would be imparted by osmosis before Park had her rematch with Deschain.
CAMILLE COSWORTH:
In front of her was a massive leather bound book containing the complete works of Edgar Allen Poe, in which she had written a message on the inside cover using her best penmanship:
To the new Queen of the Madhouse,
Long may she reign!
Yours truly,
Camille
She could not truthfully call herself friends or even acquaintances with the Raven, but she still enjoyed watching Lemarchand smother out the former Queen of the Madhouse, and this was simultaneously a token of her appreciation, a house warming gift, and a Christmas present.
After taking a few seconds to admire her handiwork, Camille freshened her cup and went about examining some of the other holiday presents she had prepared.
For Massachusetts football fan Maggie Connor, there was an official New England Patriots football that was deflated to precisely two PSI below the legal limit.
For bartender and mercenary Cassandra Vale, there was a Louisville Slugger with several large, rusty nails haphazardly hammered into the barrel. In a moment of inspiration, Camille had christened the weapon “Nail Bat.”
And for very, very bad girl Adelaide Brewster, there was a bag of charcoal briquettes.
Snickering at her own cleverness, Cosworth drained her eggnog in three big gulps and was about to go for another refill when the door to the condo swung open and Yoona Park walked in carrying a couple of large boxes.
YOONA PARK:
“Yoooonnaaaa, daaaarrrrrling…” Camille lilted. “Didya get all the presents?”
Yoona narrowed her eyes and asked, “Have you been drinking?”
“Had some eggnog. Just a cup or two. Or three. Or seven.”
Park cocked her head quizzically to one side and held that pose for a few seconds before finally saying, “The eggnog was non-alcoholic.”
“Oh,” Camille said bluntly, immediately sobering up from her placebo inebriation.
Yoona just shook her head as she placed her load on a table, then fished out a USB stick and handed it to Cosworth.
“That’s for Lenore. All four seasons and one hundred episodes of That’s So Raven.”
Camille opened her mouth as if to say something, then wisely decided against it. Park’s brain often operated on a much weirder wavelength, and to try to follow that runaway train of logic was folly of the highest order.
“This is for Shitty McShithead,” Park said as she opened one of the boxes she carried in, revealing an erotic cake decorated like a woman’s backside. Also in the box was a bottle of cheap tequila and a placard reading, "THINGS YOU LIKE HAVING IN YOUR FACE."
The tequila made Cosworth cringe, as that particular fiasco had gotten Yoona a hefty fine and a ten day suspension. Even now, Park was still in the doghouse with management, as evidenced by the talented Korean being conspicuously absent from the upcoming Rookie of the Year tournament. Yoona had acted like she didn’t want to participate in the first place, although it was clear to Camille that her girlfriend was actually incensed at being left out.
“And THIS…” Park said as she opened the second box. “This is for my Girl of Tomorrow and the future Rookie of the Year...”
From the box she pulled out a pair of royal blue shorts with electric green trim, a racerback sports bra in the same color scheme, and a matching pair of low-cut, laceless wrestling shoes.
“Go ahead, babe. Try them on.”
Shrugging out of her bathrobe, Cosworth slipped into her new gear and found that everything fit her like a glove. The top exposed exactly the maximum amount of cleavage she was comfortable with while leaving her sculpted midriff completely bare, the tight-fitting bottoms extended about halfway down her thighs with the waist band coming up an inch short of her belly button, and the wrestling shoes came up to just below her ankle bones to minimize weight while still providing good traction and cushioning for her spectacular leaps. Most impressively, the material was very elastic and durable while still letting her skin breathe so easily that it felt like she was wearing almost nothing at all.
Park grinned and let out a sharp wolf-whistle. “You like? I like. I like a lot.”
“Yoona… W-when…?”
“I shopped around online last week and got this commissioned from some specialty fabric shop,” Yoona said. “I know you want to dress like you’re just one of the fans, but come on Cam, we both know that’s bullshit. You’re the Paragon of Hope, not the Paragon of Love Handles. Besides, you were always overheating like you were going to blow the fuck up at any moment with your tights and t-shirt combo. This gear is made from some ultra-permeable, high-tech fabric which should help fix that problem.”
Camille gave her girlfriend a hug and a kiss, and then a terrible realization dawned upon her.
“Umm… I, uhhh, I didn’t get you anything so thoughtful,” she said sheepishly.
Cosworth went to her side of the coat closet, retrieved a book she had hidden there, and gave it to Yoona.
“Err… Merry Christmas!”
Park arched an eyebrow as she read the title out loud, “Suplexes for Dummies.”
“It was a two-for-one deal when I bought my Korean for Dummies book,” Camille explained ruefully. “I, umm, I didn’t know what to get for the girl who has everything.”
“I don’t have a pony,” Yoona said flatly. “You could have gotten me a pony.”
Camille groaned, “I don’t mean you literally have everything. I was just trying to say how you already have all the stuff you want with a cute reference to a famous Superman story. You know, like how Girl of Tomorrow is a play on Man of Tomorrow?”
A puzzled look came over Park’s face and then she said, “I don’t think Superman has a pony either...”
Cosworth took a sharp inhale of breath through her teeth, and once again managed to suppress the urge to say something.
“Wait, shit, is that what you think Girl of Tomorrow means?”
“Is it not?”
“Is your mom named MARTHAAAAAA!!!?”
“No. No, she’s not,” Camille sighed in defeat. “So then what does Girl of Tomorrow mean?”
“It means… umm...” a wry smile spread across Yoona’s face as she hesitated a second. “It means whatever makes you feel like a badass, Cam.”
Even though she wasn’t quite satisfied with that cryptic answer, Cosworth gave her girlfriend a peck on the cheek. “I love the outfit, Yoona. I’ll give it a try when I’m sparring with Syd tomorrow.”
Park suddenly perked up. After a little cajoling from Camille, she had given her girlfriend her blessing to train with Deschain, and Cosworth had been sparring with Sydney twice a week ever since in order to prepare for the rookie tournament. Now at the mention of the Technical Marvel, the gears in Yoona’s head started churning.
“How is the old cougar these days? Is she still any good, or has Father Time rendered her toothless?” she asked.
“Ohhh man, is she still any good?!” Camille enthusiastically blurted out. “Haha! Syd’s the best wrestler I’ve ever --”
She abruptly cut herself off when she realized what she was saying, and more importantly, who she was saying it to. Park looked neutral and expressionless, and while anyone else would mistake that for calm, Cosworth knew her girlfriend well enough to recognize that this was Yoona’s furious face.
“Sorry,” she said meekly as she examined the tops of her new wrestling shoes.
“Sorry for what?” the Korean spat.
Camille didn't answer, as she knew that anything she said would only stoke Yoona’s anger. An awkward silence fell over the room for nearly a minute before Park spoke again.
“Even better than Connor?” Yoona asked, the almost lyrical inflection and cadence in her voice a reassuring sign that her irritation had mostly subsided.
“Maggie is strong, fast, and skilled -- that I know how to approach at least,” Cosworth replied. “With Syd though, it's like I'm in control one second and then I'm getting twisted in five different directions the next. I don't even know what the heck happened or what I did wrong until she talks me through it step by step while watching the replay.”
Park considered this for a moment before asking, “Have you beaten her in sparring yet?”
Camille shook her head.
“Has anyone else?”
Camille shook her head again, “Not that I know of.”
Yoona grinned like the Cheshire Cat, “Excellent.”
“I know what you're thinking and I --” Cosworth hesitated before finishing her thought, “-- I don't want you to wrestle Syd.”
“What.”
The anger was back in Park’s voice.
“Yoona, with the way things went down the first time, no matter who wins --”
“I’ll win,” Yoona growled.
Camille sighed helplessly, “It’s not going to be a dignified victory, and I’m worried this will poison my relationship with Sydney. I really enjoy training with her and I don't want you to --”
“What the hell, Cam?! You're taking her side?!
“I’m not taking anyone’s side --”
“WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU?! YOU SHOULD BE TAKING MY SIDE!” Park suddenly bellowed as she punched her left hand through the drywall, violently bringing silence to the room as her girlfriend looked on with mouth agape.
After several seconds, Yoona gingerly extracted her fist -- now bleeding from a two inch shard of plasterboard embedded between her knuckles -- and let out an exhausted sigh.
“Cam, I’m sorry. I’m just -- I’m just incredibly frustrated. I look at you and I see how far you’ve come already in this company, and ninety nine percent of me is just overjoyed and happy because you’re an amazing person and you work so hard and you deserve all the good things in this world.”
Yoona picked the shrapnel out of her hand and continued talking, “The other one percent of me wants what you have. And if you call me selfish you’re probably right, but I think I deserve it too. Maybe I shouldn’t be at the head of the table yet, but at least I should have a seat at the goddamn table, you know? I gave Dare a good run, and I had Belle dead to rights if it weren’t for that fucking ref, and now they’re telling me I can’t even get a shot at rookie of the year? What the fuck is that shit?”
Cosworth grabbed a towel from the table and started tending to her girlfriend’s hand while the Korean kept speaking, “Beating Deschain would have let me write my own ticket, because God knows I’m getting fuck-all from the front office. And I know I can beat her too. As far as I’m concerned, I’m two and three against her, not zero and one. So Cam, please, I want this. I need this. But I can’t -- I won’t -- do this without you in my corner.”
Camille took some time to gather her thoughts and said, “I get it, Yoona. I really do. I wish I could do for you what you’ve done for me --”
“You know, it’d be nice if you would fangirl over me the way you just did over Deschain,” Yoona quietly interrupted.
Cosworth ran a hand over her face and groaned, “Okay. Okay, that's fair. And I believe you when you tell me you’ll win but it's just that… it's just… ugh… you know what? Let me talk to Syd about it first, okay? You can be rather… abrasive, and I think this needs a more diplomatic touch.”
“You’ll let me fight her then?”
Camille nodded, “Who knows if Sydney’s going to want to keep sparring with me afterwards, but if it means that much to you -- well, that's a risk I'm willing to take. I know you'd do the same for me…”
Yoona kissed her girlfriend on the forehead and smiled. “Thanks, babe. This almost makes up for your shitty Christmas present!”
“Oh, quit your whining! I’ll get you a pony next Christmas. What breed do you want?”
“Whatever breed is most delicious.”
Cosworth rolled her eyes and playfully smacked her girlfriend on the side of the head with the Suplex for Dummies book. With any luck, some of the much needed knowledge would be imparted by osmosis before Park had her rematch with Deschain.