Post by alyadmirer on Apr 19, 2016 19:18:23 GMT
A lull in the crowd noise allowed the Announcer to do his thing once more. Ladies and gentlemen, the following Tag Team contest is scheduled for one fall with a twenty minute time limit! If the Beach Bombers win, Babe Babcock will receive a Lightweight Championship match at Spring Break! If Barely Legal wins, Gabby Mendoza and Rose Evans will compete against Lily Burlingame in a Triple Threat Match for the Lightweight Championship. Introducing first, at a combined weight of two hundred and thirty-two pounds, Babe Babcock and the FAWN Lightweight Champion, Lily Burlingame. They are the BEACH BOMBERS!”
Eager to train their attention on the Siren of Surf & Sand and the Star Strider, the March to War crowd sprang up and cheered uproariously out when the lights went down. From within that swirling, anticipatory gloom came a thumping drum and a matched set of snapping fingers, the two bits of percussion bouncing to and fro in a rat-a-tat riff. A keening guitar note joined the beat and a few seconds later the situation got brighter in no small part due to the tongue of flame that licked at the base of the ramp. As the note held steady, the fire set off on a beeline for the top of the ramp.
The wick shrank in time with the arrival of more guitars and an Earth-shattering KA-BOOM of red pyro that almost swallowed a mash-up of Comeback Kid and One More Minute. From the center of this flash and flame a pair of figures emerged, shooting up from the floor to land flawlessly before the capacity crowd.
BABE BABCOCK:
LILY BURLINGAME:
Strolling coolly from that brand spankin‘ new crater, Babe pumped a fist for the crowd while Lily patted the golden faceplate of the belt snapped around her waist. After a quick nod, blonde and brunette bumped fists and flew down the ramp in a blur of black, red and white. For tonight’s row with Barely Legal the champ wore gleaming black bottoms accented by swirling galaxies of stars done in red and white. Her top was halter-style sports bra done in an identical scheme, the red and white seeming to shimmer and twine with her every move. Kneepads were matching black and also sported the galaxy motif, white on the left and red on the right. Her hair, though free of the mask, was still pulled back in a long, sweeping ponytail. Babe wore a similar two piece, though hers was dark blue and black, the sworls designed to look like whirlpools and tidal waves. Her boots and knee pads were both gleaming white and her blonde hair was pulled back in a loose ponytail that matched her partner’s.
More than a little eager to get vengeance for the attack earlier in the evening, the Beach Babe and the Girl That Gravity Forgot tore down the ramp then leapt from the floor to the apron to the top rope in the span between heartbeats. Bouncing from it as casually as the terminally grounded stepped off the curb, Lily hooked a sharp turn to the left, while Babe went right and both ladies leapt from the mat to the top rope for stereo back flips that posted them up near the center of the ring.
Pounding fists for an earth-shattering KABOOM, blonde and brunette turned to the malevolent millennials with Babe taking point for her squad. “You gutless pieces of crap are going to pay for trying to hold me hostage!”
Rose arched an eyebrow. “Try? Bytch Face, there is no try. We got EXACTLY what we wanted. And now we get to kick your sandy ass… again.”
Babcock would’ve gone at her then if Lily hadn’t angled an arm across her chest. “Let it go, Babe. Words are all she’s got.” Burlingame said. “Well, that and a soft little gut perfect for breaking falls. Isn’t that right, Rosie?” Evans snarled, started to step forward before a glance from Carpenter slowed her roll. Lily winked as she led Babcock to the Bombers’ corner. “See ya soon, brainiac.”
The speakers crackled back to life, pumping out Charli XCX’s “Famous”, much to the sudden and vociferous condemnation of the Orlando faithful.
“FAMOUS”:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=O7Mabm90wuE )
“First,” the announcer resumed, “hailing from Buffalo, New York... She stands five feet three inches tall and weighs in at one hundred and twenty-one pounds. She is the Smartest Girl in the Room, ROSE EVANS! And her partner, from Irving, Texas... She stands five feet five inches tall and weighs in at one hundred and twenty-two pounds. Ladies and gentlemen, the Babyfaced Killer, GABBY MENDOZA! Together, they ARE... BAAARRREEELLLYYY LEEEGGGAAALLL!!!!!”
ROSE EVANS:
GABBY MENDOZA:
A few moments after that introduction, two lovely young ladies emerge from backstage—with an emphasis on “YOUNG.” Evans and Mendoza strolled down to the ring virtually side by side—Gabby trailed perhaps a step behind—to a decidedly lustful reaction from the capacity crowd. Rose—the shorter and more fair skinned of the two—looked fairly impassive as she approached the ring, intently eying down the two women she was about to go to war against. Her eyes never registered the presence of the crowd or wavered from the ring. Gabby—just a little taller with a darker complexion—seemed a little more aware of her surroundings, and possibly even less impressed with the fans around ringside. But, if she was scowling, the effect was somewhat diluted by the periodic bubbles that Mendoza blew with her gum.
Both women were dressed the exact same way: adorned in black lace panties underneath plaid mini-skirts and matching black bustiers that, with neither of these women likely to be mistaken for Hailey Kennedy, gave their bosoms an extremely flattering boost. Both sets of well-shaped legs were encased in thigh high black nylons along with white boots. Climbing onto the apron, Rose and Gabby slipped one leg through the ropes, bending deep at the waist as they swept their upper bodies toward the ring…
… only to stop halfway, their faces sooooooo close to coming into contact.
Mendoza and Evans brushed noses, exchanging an Eskimo kiss, before pulling the rest of the way into the ring. And once the referee had checked out both sides for foreign objects, Evans slide back out onto the apron, taking up her station in the Barely Legal corner. While she had a few more words with Gabby, Rose leaned against the buckles, letting the Babyfaced Killer massage her shoulders as she waited to see whether blonde or brunette would start out against.
No deliberation when the bell sounded, Rose came forward for her team while the Beach Bombers countered with Babe. Sniffing with disdain at what she saw as an obvious stall tactic by the terrified champion, Evans stamped to the middle of the ring and offered Babcock an imperious ‘off with you’ sort of hand wave. “You can just turn your Baywatch Dinner Theatre ass around right now, sweetheart.” she told the slender blonde. “I came here to deal with a champion, not her poolgirOOOFFFFHHH!”
The Siren of Surf & Sand hit her like a tidal wave, Babcock laying in a deluge of Forearm Smashes as she started repaying the beating Evans and Mendoza had laid on her earlier in the month. Caught flatfooted and gawping by the furious assault, Rose didn’t manage to raise a defense until her back was almost smudging the cables. “BREAK!” the stunned brainiac hollered the instant she careened into the strands. “Check that pig’s hoofs for rolls of quarters, there’s no way she hits that UUNNNNGGHH!”
Babcock stepped in, pivoted on her left foot and THWHUMPED the broadest, sturdiest part of her right thigh up into the ingénue’s tummy. Al stepped forward, meaning to tell her to offer the break, but the words were still in his mouth when the red-clad blonde snatched hold of her foe’s wrist and sent her racing to the far side of the ring. Babe followed less than half a dozen steps behind and she certainly would’ve taken Evans’s head off with her Can Opener if the other woman hadn’t cinched an arm over the top rope, bringing her to a dead stop. Rose bailed immediately thereafter, fightin’ pride taking a backseat to strategy while she regrouped from the idiot’s onslaught.
“KEEP HER IN THE RING!” Evans barked at the official as soon as she’d caught her breath. “I MEAN IT, CARPENTER! KEEP THAT SEA MONKEY ON A LEASH OR--”
“ROSE, LOOK OUT!” She twisted her head in the direction of Gabby’s voice just in time to watch Lily leap from the apron at a dead run. Legs spread in a predatory ‘V’ the lightweight champion ‘smecked’ her stems shut around Rose’s noggin and twisted her hips to fling the malign millennial off her feet courtesy of a Hurricanrana.
APRON HURRICANRANA:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=jTIsyL8XNY0
Burlingame popped up, raised her hands to shoulder level and backed off without so much as a word of complaint to the barking zebra. “Better keep your head on a swivel, Rosie.” the Star Strider chided as she headed back to her corner. “Or Babe and I are gonna have you two idiots seeing stars.”
Back in the ring Babe noted Evans’s position and ran through a couple quick calculations. The math was just about right when a roar from the crowd alerted her to incoming danger. Excellent timing too, if they’d been a half second later Mendoza would’ve dented the back of her skull with a Clothesline. As it was she dipped beneath the strike so late she felt the breeze of the brunette’s forearm flick at her hair. Gabby stopped on a dime, whirled around and THWHACK! Babe sprang up in a gorgeous vertical leap that ended with the point of her right knee colliding with her attacker’s chin.
SHORT-RANGE CAN OPENER @ 00:50
www.youtube.com/watch?v=WZJGqi1-zzM
Staggered by the short-range Can Opener, Mendoza could do nothing but come along for the ride when Babcock grabbed her by the nape of the neck and charged ropes where Rose initially bailed. Hitting the brakes at the last second, Babe hurled the Babyfaced Killer over the top rope and watched with clear delight as she flattened her rising partner with an involuntary Flying Crossbody.
Her desire for vengeance in no way quashed by this fast start, Babe made to head out to the floor only to have Al interpose himself between her and the ropes. “Back off Babe. I need to get those two up and separated.”
“C’mon Al, you know what they did to me!” she grumbled.
“I do. Which is why I’m going to get one of them back in here as quick as I can. Now stand back and lemme do my job.”
Babcock sighed but made no further comment. Considering the issue settled, the ref strode over to the ropes, leaned over and wedged a good half of his lanky frame between the top and middle strands. “On your feet you two. I want Rose in the ring and Gabby back in the corner posthaste. If I think you’re sandbagging me I’ll end this thing right now and make sure neither of you is in that title match next month!”
The Smartest Girl in the Room had tuned him out until that threat about March to War. That got her back to full verticality so fast it was almost eerie. “That is a GROSS abuse of power and I won’t stand for it! Threaten us like that again and I’ll OH CRAPPNNNNGGGGHHH!”
Tired of waiting for Carpenter to do things the polite way, Babe ran to the far side of the squared circle, charged down her own back-trail and somersaulted over the oblivious official at a frightening rate of speed. Gabby’d taken the Can Opener all by her lonesome so it was only fitting that Rose soaked up the worst the Cannonball had to offer. Knocked flat on her back by the gorgeous Plancha, Rose was reduced to blinking up at the lights in wide-eyed astonishment while Babe scrambled to her feet and addressed the front row FAWNatics.
CANNONBALL:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=qByEPi9W9Gk
“YOU SEE THAT?” she swept an arm to better indicate the human flotsam and jetsam bobbing in her wake. “THAT’S WHAT HAPPENS WHEN BRATS HAVE TO FIGHT FAIR!”
Though the count was still fresh and she yearned to bounce Gabby’s forehead off the railing more than a few times, Babe focused her attention on Rose, scraping her off the floor and bundling her under the bottom rope before Al could get any more strident in his counting. Hand on the middle rope, she boosted herself onto the apron where she paused to glance at her corner. “Thanks for the assist earlier. You mind if I keep hammering this idiot?”
“Be my guest.” Lily replied at once. “You deserve it. So does she.”
“Damn right she does.”
Unable to keep quiet even when it was in her best interest, Rose Evans sat up and muttered, “The only thing I deserve is that Lightweight Championship. And it’ll be around my waist soon enough, bytch-facOOOFFFHHH!” Babe stepped through the ropes, braced her right foot on the bottom strand and used it to launch herself into a ground-skimming Flying Crossbody that THWHUMPED against Rose’s chest. Truncated or not, it kept the mouthy blonde pressed flat long enough for Carpenter to count off…
KIDDIE SPLASH:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=ngwPXIHARi8
ONE…
TWO…
Rose fought loose and sat up, an ugly scowl marring her pretty features. “Nice try, pool skimmer.” she snarled. “But it’ll take a lot more than some community college dropout to keep me from my desUUUGGGHHHH FAAAAHHHK!” Rose’s sass once again devolved into breathless grunting when Babcock sat down behind her and slipped both legs around her waist.
Ankles locked, palms planted flat, Babe pushed up off her tush and squeeeeeeeeeeeeeezed until Evans tossed her head back and wailed. “How’s that feel, brat? Huh? How’s that feel? Gonna think twice about jumping me next time, aren’t you?” the Beachcomber snarled.
“Thuuuu…. there won’t BE a next time.” Rose rasped. “Gabby and I are gonna end you tonNNNGGGGHH!” Babcock set herself down so she could PWAK Forearm Smashes across the base of her victim’s neck. “Keep it up, genius. Every time you run your damned mouth I am going to make you SCREAM. Understand?” The trapped tyro didn’t immediately offer a rebuttal, which Babe took as a very good sign.” Rising up on her hands for another prolonged squeeze, she looked to the ref and chirped, “Ask her, please. I can feel her ribs starting to go.”
“How about it, Ro...” the official began to ask, but the question was cut off by a snarl of defiance, what few syllables which were intelligible not being fit to be repeated in polite society.
Sensing that a submission would not be forthcoming no matter what the condition of Evans’ ribs might be, Babcock broke her Scissors and yanked the Smartest Girl in the Room up to her feet by a handful of hair. Ready to keep the fight going and on her terms, the blonde beach babe took hold of Rose’s wrist, set her feet and sent the Barely Legal brat on her way with an Irish Whip...
... or tried to. Instead, Evans proved to have at least a little bit of fight left in her, reversing the Whip. As Babe rebounded off the cables, the brains of Barely Legal raised her right arm, intending to catch Babcock across the throat with a Clothesline. But as Evans took a step forward, Babe lowered her head, ducking under the scythe and continuing on her way into the opposite ropes. With even more of a head of steam behind her now, the Beach Bunny prepared to leave her feet and catch Rose with a decisive Leg Lariat...
LEG LARIAT:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=ljpsnjziai4
... but that head of steam was brought to an abrupt halt by a sharp yank, Babe letting out a howl of pain as Gabby Mendoza snatched a handful of flaxen tresses and pulled back. Babcock had little choice but to spin around and face the other Barely Legal brat, but she could do a little more than that. Indeed, balling her right fist, the blonde took a swing, hoping to knock Mendoza’s block off, or at the very least drop her from the apron.
Unfortunately, Gabby proved one step ahead of her, hopping down to the floor of her own accord. “That’s what I thooOOOOOUUUUUNNNGGGGGHHHHHH!” Babe began to assert, until an Uppercut parted her thighs from behind, Rose Evans demonstrating herself smart enough to take advantage of this particular opening. With Babcock’s legs quaking, Evans slipped her head under the lifeguard’s left arm, wrapped her arms around Babe’s waist and ripped her foe off her feet. Bridging back, Rose DROVE Babcock’s head and shoulders into the canvas with a wicked Saito Suplex, what she called She Loves Me Not.
SHE LOVES ME NOT:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=T8XPR6iRv_Q
The Smartest Girl in the Room then grabbed hold of Babe’s right ankle with both hands and dragged her opponent into the Barely Legal corner. Releasing one hand from that grip, Evans reached behind her, allowing Gabby Mendoza to slap her hand and make herself legal. However, instead of departing the ring, Rose secured a new grip on Babe’s leg, which she used to roll the blonde over to her belly. Stepping over that well-shaped gam, Evans sunk into a deep crouch, securing a Single Leg Crab.
SINGLE LEG BOSTON CRAB:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=vnzGtY2MOm8
Across the ring, Lily Burlingame began to register a protest, but she soon had reason to do more when Gabby claimed possession of Babcock’s left leg and applied a Half Crab of her very own! That proved enough to convince the Girl That Gravity Forgot that words would NOT be enough, and the diminutive brunette launched herself over the top rope...
Now, it’s quite possible that the reverberation of the canvas would have tipped the referee off that someone else had entered the ring. But Rose had a nice view of the intrusion, facing the champ’s corner, and she promptly brought Burlingame’s trespass to the zebra’s attention. He immediately moved to prevent Lily from involving herself--and Rose and Gabby immediately went to work giving the respective foot in their possession savage twists and turns, Babe forced to shriek in agony, until she could wrap a hand around the bottom rope...
... but the referee was still engaged with a protesting Burlingame, giving the Barely Legal duo considerably more than five seconds to continue with their not even remotely legal tactics.
With Burlingame finally ushered back toward her corner, Evans tossed Babcock’s leg aside and made her departure. Mendoza rose out of her crouch, but she kept hold of Babe’s ankle, first yanking the blonde away from the ropes and then hoisting the gam high into the air. Reversing course, the Babyfaced Killer SLAMMED the Beach Bunny’s knee into the thinly padded plywood, Babe letting out a yelp and drawing the wounded knee up to her chest, clutching it with both hands.
Dropping to her tush behind the reeling blonde, Gabby pulled Babe up to a seated position before slipping her legs around Babcock’s waist. First, she placed a boot against the lifeguard’s left thigh, forcing that leg down before Mendoza crossed her ankles between Babe’s stems. The deceptively cruel brunette then slipped her arms underneath Babcock’s wings, applying a Full Nelson before she rocked back, lifting the Beach Bunny into the air...
... and then dropping her back down, brutally, bum first. Gabby added a couple more Keister Bounces to the barrage before relinquishing the nelson and then taking a page out of Babe’s earlier book, pressing her palms flat against the mat and pushing HERSELF into the air as she bore down on her Bodyscissors. Unlike Babcock earlier, however, Mendoza didn’t demand the referee check for a submission--she was too preoccupied with her Hubba Bubba. But that didn’t prevent the official from asking if Babe wanted to call it a night.
“Not a channnnnnnggggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhh.....” Babcock gasped as Gabby dropped back to her tush, the Babyfaced Killer’s bubble having grown to considerable size as she leaned forward--until it reached beyond its structurally integrity, a loud ‘POP!’ going off right beside Babe’s right ear.
Breaking her Bodyscissors, Gabby climbed to her feet and tugged Babe up with a handful of hair. The Babyfaced Killer turned her back to the Barely Legal corner as she tucked the blonde’s bowed noggin under her left arm. She then grabbed a handful of red fabric around Babe’s right hip, popped HER hips, and executed a stunningly crisp Snap Suplex.
SNAP SUPLEX:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=hE2qR9IuF2o
While Babcock’s back struck the canvas hard, perhaps the worst part of the maneuver was that Gabby’s proximity to the Barely Legal corner had led to the blonde’s lower legs striking the ropes, each on either side of the ring-post and the turnbuckles. And alas, perhaps worse STILL was the Babyfaced Killer pressing the sole of her boot down across Babe’s windpipe as she reached out to tag the Smartest Girl in the Room back into the contest.
Mendoza only lifted her foot once Rose was in the ring, the brunette sending a cheeky, supportive swat to Rose’s rump as she departed--and Evans quickly answered in kind, lest the official choose to interpret the gesture as a tag. Hair-hauling Babcock to her feet, the brains of Barely Legal backed the blonde into the ropes with a couple of forearms to the chest, then bodied in and claimed a wrist. Setting her feet, Rose attempted to usher Babe along into the opposite ropes, but much as Evans had done to her earlier in the contest, the Beach Bunny reversed the Irish Whip. Unlike Babe earlier, Rose failed to prevent the lifeguard from catching her on the rebound, Babcock scooping the Smartest Girl in the Room off her feet...
... but only because Rose had WANTED to be caught.
As Babe hauled her up, Evans caught the blonde’s head between her legs in a scissors, then whipped her upper body around Babe’s back. At that point, Rose let one of her legs slip away from the Beach Bunny’s noggin, hoping her boot around Babcock’s calf as her other leg pressed down against the back of the blonde’s skull. Meanwhile, Evans brought both her hands to clamp around Babe’s right wrist, pulling the limb away from her side as she fully cinched in her Rose Vine.
ROSE VINE:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=gtPdQde3r2A
Almost immediately, the official dropped to one knee beside the entwined duo and asked if Babcock wanted to give it up. The blonde lifeguard hissed out a refusal, while a smugly smirked Rose waved Babe’s captive hand in the direction of a helpless Lily Burlingame, the Lightweight Champion’s arm nowhere near long enough to reach out and make the tag.
“Don’t bother taking notes, bytch face!” Rose sneered at the helpless, fuming champion. “The things I do to you will make this look remedWHOOOAAAHH!”
Sensing her attacker’s attention elsewhere, Babe dipped, twisted and rolled in a single sinuous motion that put her squarely on Evans’s six. Babcock palmed her foe’s shoulders, leapt up and landed with her legs framing Rose’s noggin, Electric Chair style. Arms spread wide, she lowered her head and tumbled into a tight little curl that ended with her in a comfortable seat while Rose’s rump pointed straight at the lights. Corralling the terrible tyro’s thighs under her arms, Babe leaned back and nodded along for the…
ONE…
TWO…
The Smartest Girl in the Room bucked free with a full second to spare, not that you’d have known it by the expression of horrified shock plastered to her patrician features. Quicker to rise even after escaping the Victory Roll, Evans ruined Babe’s return to verticality with a stiff Kneelift to the belly and a THWHUMPING overhand Forearm Smash delivered across her shoulders.
“Should’ve tapped out before I noticed you were alive, Baywatch.” Rose growled as she laid claim to Babcock’s wrist. “Now I’m gonna take you out to the deep water.”
With that she stepped back, dropped a shoulder and slung Babe at a neutral set of ropes. In no position to alter her course, the Siren of Surf & Sand hit the cables back-first and charged back at Evans, who’d thrown herself into the opposite set of strands. Picking up speed as she closed the gap, Rose leapt, twisted sideways in mid-air and “OOOOFFFFFFHH!” Babe did some leaping of her own, only she led with her right knee, the point of which THWHUMPED deep into her opponent’s midsection. Gutted by the Can Opener, Evans hit the deck with a breathless grunt and sucked wind while a weary former lifeguard started toward her corner on all fours.
Tag rope in one hand, Lily climbed onto the bottom rope and leaaaaaaaaaaaaaaned forward as far as her considerable balance would allow. “C’MON BABE, YOU’RE ALMOST THERE!” she bellowed. “JUST A LITTLE FARTHER AND I’LL CLEAN UP THIS TRASH!”
Gabby was also mounted on the second rope, though she was pointing into the ring rather than asking for a tag. “GET UP, ROSIE! KNOCK THE SAND RAT ON HER ASS, DON’T LET HER TAG OUT!”
Rose clambered to boot leather while Mendoza was talking and even in her slightly nauseated state she knew she couldn’t reach Gabs before Babcock reached her corner. Her eyes narrowed slightly. There *was* another possibility however. Forcing the hurt to the back of her mind, Evans raced at, then beyond Babe to knock Burlingame from her perch with a ‘OOOOOOOOOHHHHHHH!’ the FAWNatics cringed in sympathetic hurt when Lily hopped up (holding the top rope in both hands for support) and angled hard to the right to THWHACK a Roundhouse across Rose’s forehead.
Eyes set on ‘TILT’, a staggering Rose turned around and made her escape directly into the path of Babe Babcock, who’d regained her feet just in time to drive both knees into the other blonde’s chest. “Sorry about the wait, partner.” Babe huffed as she ‘clapped’ Lily’s outstretched hand. “Ready to make up for lost time?”
“You know it. You thinking Depth Charge?”
“Damned right I am.”
Babe slapped Rose across the face for good measure, then stuffed a shoulder into her tummy and muscled her into a seat on the top turnbuckle. Moving even faster than usual to accommodate the referee’s count, Babcock scurried onto the middle rope and immediately hopped straight up. A pair of beach-tanned stems ‘smecked’ around Rose’s neck and then she was spiraling through the air courtesy of Babe’s Avalanche ‘Rana. The Beach Bunny had rolled under the bottom rope by the time Rose THWHAMMED against the mat, not that the wide-eyed blonde noticed anything other than her throbbing spine.
This single mindedness continued right up until the moment Lily vaulted onto the top rope and launched herself into the heavens. Knees pulled to chest level, the Lightweight Champion twirled through one and a quarter rotations and stretched out full length a whole heartbeat before she THWHAMMED down on Evans’s exposed tummy. Crushed at stern and bow by the rapid-fire combination of maneuvers, Rose only groaned when Burlingame hooked the far leg and drew it close for….
ONE…
TWO…
THRNOOOO!
The Star Strider relinquished the cover and pulled clear just in time for Gabby to bury a Double Axehandle in her partner’s tummy. “DAMMIT! Sorry Rose, I didn’t NNNNNGGGGHHHHH!”
Lily Burlingame wasn’t the biggest fan of cheap shots, but she didn’t hesitate to smack the taste out of Gabby’s petulant mouth. “Back to your corner, Froot Stripe.” she taunted. “You can spell the Mathlete if she can crawl to safety.”
Already close to the action because of the near-fall, Al Carpenter placed a hand on Mendoza’s shoulder and said, “C’mon Gabby, you know the--” she swatted him aside and hopped over her prone partner, but in so doing she left herself vulnerable to the Toe Kick Burlingame planted in her navel. Mendoza doubled over, so Lily hit her with a second Toe Kick, this one hitting square between the eyes. That rocked the Baby-Faced Killer back on her heels, meaning Lily had the perfect opportunity to hop up and plant her left foot on the stunned brunette’s left thigh. In the next instant Burlingame’s other foot arced up and around to CRAAACK off her opponent’s temple.
Gabby stumbled backward, tripped over Rose and went down on her butt with a thump that would’ve been funny if any of the women in the ring felt like laughing. Still determined to get the interloper back to her corner, Carpenter took Gabby by the arm and tried to help her stand. Up and at’em, Gabby. I don’t want to disqualif-- oh, c’mon Lil!”
Burlingame snatched Gabby at trunks and tresses and charged her toward a neutral side of the ring. Slamming on the brakes just as she reached the point of no return, the Interstellar Angel hurled Mendoza over the top rope and watched long enough to see her THWHAP against the thin-blue mats surrounding the ring. “Now that we’ve dealt with Violet Beauregard…” Lily turned around and leveled a grin on Rose. “We can see to Veruca Sault.”
Only vaguely aware of her friend’s muffed interference, Evans sat up, looked to the Barely Legal corner and frowned when she didn’t see Gabby. “What did you do with her, bytch face?” she demanded of the champ.
“Don’t worry about that. Worry about what I’m gonna do to you.”
Rose peeled herself off the canvas, made a few minor adjustments to her skirt and rolled her eyes. “Please. I could beat you with one hand tied behind my back.”
“One day I’ll let you prove that, doofus. For right now why don’t you step up and fight? Try not to lose on your way ov--” Burlingame shut up as she caught a blonde kick aimed between her thighs. She’d barely processed the near miss when Evans sprang off her plant foot and whipped it at the brunette’s skull in an Enzugiri of her own.
“OOOFFFHHHH!” Lily dipped her head in the nick of time, leaving the Smartest Girl in the Room to land awkwardly on her tummy. “Don’t think you’re clever, idiot.” Rose huffed. “I’ll crush you OOOHHH F*CK NO! KEEP AWAY FROM EEERRRGGHHH!”
Lily stepped onto her foe’s thighs, grabbed her ankles and folded Rose’s shins into place against her own. Then she reached down and smacked at Evans’s ribs until the blonde was forced to defend herself. Snatching both wrists in an instant, Burlingame looked over at Babe, who was smiling broadly. “Hey, you mind if I give this brat a view from the top of the Watchtower?”
“Oh please, I insist. Take her all the way up!”
With Babe’s blessing, Lily dipped her knees and rolled onto her back, hauling Rose into a spine-wrenching Romero Stretch.
What do you say, Rose?” Al Carpenter asked, but received for his troubles a vehement shake of the head from the Smartest Girl in the Room.
“The real deal from flat-chested Pamela Anderson over there wouldn’t make me quit,” Rose managed to hiss, her eyes closed and teeth gritted. “If you think Cherry’s knock off...”
“REF!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”
That shout had come not from Rose or from Lily, but rather from the Babyfaced Killer across the ring, Gabby Mendoza hopping as she pointed toward the Beach Bombers’ corner--and, more specifically, toward the top turnbuckle. For, having apparently taken exception to the moniker Evans had given her, Babe had climbed her way up top and launched toward the Barely Legal brat with tucked knees, dropping them harshly on the suspended Rose’s chest.
Evans hit the deck, dropped by Burlingame who herself offered a slight groan of pain from taking Babcock’s weight striking her opponent. But the Girl That Gravity Forgot still proved quicker to her feet, reaching her corner almost as soon as Babe had slipped through the ropes, and slapping the blonde’s offered hand. Advancing on the rising Rose, the Beach Babe grabbed hold of her opponent’s left wrist before slipping around behind Evans, drawing her own arm across her throat. Babcock then slipped her free arm underneath Rose’s tied up wing, her hand pressing against the back of Evans’ neck. The blonde then popped her hips, bridging back and dropping the Smartest Girl on the Room down HARD on her head, hard enough to momentarily half Rose’s IQ.
SURFING SUPLEX:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=TAWFbOOO6dQ
Climbing back to her feet, Babe wasted little time in approaching the splattered Evans and peeling her off the mat. Taking a particular delight in the Barely Legal brat’s suddenly vacant eyes, the former lifeguard stuffed Rose’s head under her left arm, but almost as quickly rolled the back of her foe’s neck up onto her shoulder. In the next instant, Babcock kicked up her left leg before diving forward, using her Shorebreaker to SLAM Rose’s mug into the deck and switch her lights out very likely for the rest of the night.
SHOREBREAKER:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=TBCY6wPNtuQ
Shoveling the insensate brat over to her back, Babe dropped across her chest, reaching to hook a leg and secure the...
ONE...
TWO...
THRENOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!
Only a diving Double Axehandle from Gabby Mendoza kept Barely Legal alive in the match, and only the timely intervention of the referee kept the Babyfaced Killer from doing more to improve Barely Legal’s outlook. While Al Carpenter ushered the brunette from the ring, Babe shook off the effects of the blow and heading to her corner, slapping Lily’s outstretched hand loud enough to be sure that the official could hear it. But with Carpenter’s back still turned, Babcock didn’t depart. Instead, she turned back to her splayed opponent and dropped to all fours alongside her. Not missing a beat, Burlingame deftly climbed onto the blonde’s back and used that abbreviated perch to launch a beautiful Corkscrew Moonsault, her tummy ‘THWAP!’ing down across Rose’s abdomen.
CORKSCREW MOONSAULT @0:52:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=TBCY6wPNtuQ
By the time Carpenter managed to get a protesting Gabby out of the ring, Babe had very nearly finished sliding through the ropes herself. For her part, Lily was back up and at ‘em--or, more accurately, up and at the nearest neutral corner, claiming a double fisted grip on the top rope and propelling herself up from inside the ring to the top turnbuckle. As the former Cherry Bomb raised her arms triumphantly overhead, the FAWNatics as one rose to their feet, eagerly awaiting the brunette taking to the heavens like few others could.
CHERRY WARHEAD:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=jNdHhtx-Kog
The acrobatic descent was a thing of beauty. The landing was anything but, as Evans managed to summon enough of her mental faculties to think of drawing her knees up to her chest and replacing the soft, yielding crashpad Burlingame had wanted with considerably bumpier terrain. The Girl that Gravity Forgot went back into the air, but with considerably less grace and beauty as she tumbled over to her back, hugging an arm tight to her stomach as her boots drummed the mat. Rose, meanwhile, struggled to roll over to her belly, but she was able to start crawling toward a bouncing Babyfaced Killer while Burlingame continued to have difficulty with simply breathing.
Eventually, Lily managed to sit up, and then rise as her far as her knees. Alas, by that time Rose Evans had tagged out to her partner... but while Mendoza was still drawing her body through the ropes, Burlingame launched herself into a forward roll, coming out of the tumble to dive toward her corner...
... and slap her hand down across Babe Babcock’s!
The Beach Babe vaulted over the top rope in a manner that would have made her partner proud. Witnessing the escape, Gabby began to sprint toward her opponent, but the blonde charged as well, leaping into a Dropkick that SLAMMED her bare soles into Mendoza’s bosom, dropping the brunette to the canvas. Babcock was up quickly, scooping up Gabby and swinging her foe’s body through the air as she dropped to a knee, connecting with a brutal Tilt-a-Whirl Backbreaker.
TILT-A-WHIRL BACKBREAKER:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=lumuK4nM6nw
Raising off her knee, Babe slipped her arm underneath Gabby’s left arm and pulled the brunette up as well. With both women vertical, one sagging against the other, Babcock effortlessly transitioned her grip on her opponent into a Half Nelson. Reaching her right arm around Mendoza’s waist, the blonde bridged back, ripping the Babyfaced Killer from her moorings and DRIVING Gabby’s head and shoulders into the mat with her Tequila Sunrise Suplex. And she held the bridge through...
TEQUILA SUNRISE SUPLEX:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=WrWHldSaq4A
ONE...
TWO...
THRNOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!
Gabby bucked loose, and as she spilled over to her belly, Babe turned to look at Al, hopefully raising three fingers. Unfortunately, Carpenter shook his head. “Sorry, Babe,” he replied. “Just two.”
Babcock scowled, but she picked herself up and headed to the ropes. Sliding out onto the apron, the former lifeguard made a beeline toward the nearest corner and slapped the top turnbuckle. Instantly, the crowd began to clap in rhythm, while Babe herself scaled her way to the top of the watchtower. Inside the ring, the Babyfaced Killer fought her way up to wobbly legs, her back to the corner, Babe beckoning the brunette to turn around silently with a wave of her hand. Sure enough, Gabby answered the call, and Babcock launched herself to the skies, intending to tuck her knees and catch the Barely Legal brat with her diving Inverted Lungblower, the Chest Compressor...
... only before the blonde could react, GABBY took flight toward the descending Beach Babe. And SHE drew up HER knees, Mendoza’s hands reaching around to grab the back of Babe’s noggin and secure a tight grip as she fell back, Babcock suddenly and violently finding her Bubble UTTERLY Burst!
BURSTING YOUR BUBBLE:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=9mbVFgTFdFg
Both women landed on the canvas flat on their backs, chests heaving as they stared up at the lights. But Gabby found a way to roll over, letting an arm fall across Babe’s chest. It was enough of a cover for Al Carpenter to slide into position and slap off the...
ONE...
TWO...
THRENOOOOOOOO!
Babe raised a shoulder with a heartbeat to spare, then turned onto her side to make sure the brunette couldn’t try for a second cover. She needn’t have worried, Mendoza rolled in the other direction and struggled to all fours, long hair hanging lank and sweaty in her face. The Siren of Surf & Sand joined her adversary shortly thereafter and a mere look was enough to set the pair of fireplugs on another with a flurry of Bytch Slaps. These Slaps soon gave way to white-knuckled jabs, an escalation the FAWNatics greeted with raucous cheers, especially when they clambered to verticality. An alternating chorus of ‘BOO’s! and ‘YAY’s! indicated an even exchange of fisticuffs but it wasn’t long before the ‘YAY’s! had it, Babcock just teeing off on Gabby’s chin until the Baby-Faced Killer stumbled into the ropes.
Saved from a nasty tumble by nothing more than their stiff springiness, Mendoza bounced back the way she’d came and directly into the path of a big ol’ Haymak-- Gabby ducked beneath the strike and leapt onto the blonde’s back, her tanned, brawny arms looping around Babe’s neck like a noose. Legs threaded around Babcock’s waist, Mendoza crossed her ankles and SQUEEEEEEEEEEED for all she was worth.
“YEAH!” Rose bellowed from the Barely Legal side of town. “TAKE HER HEAD OFF, ROSE! CHOKE THE BYTCH OUT!”
Gabby didn’t bother to answer, the usually mouthy battler was all business, her right cheek pressed against the back of Babe’s noggin as she did indeed try to choke her into oblivion.
Over on the other side of the ring, Lily hopped onto the bottom rope and leaned into the ring circle as far as her frame would allow. “C’MON BABE!” she shouted. “GET OVER HERE AND I’LL FINISH HER OFF!”
Mendoza bore down all the harder and looked up, her dark eyes tossing sparks. “The hell you will, Bytch Fa--Aaaaahhhh shyt!”
Babe let out a gurgling roar and stamped toward sanctuary, covering half a dozen tottering steps in just as many seconds. “THAT’S IT!” Burlingame leaaaaaaaaaaned even farther, her fingers were perhaps ten inches from her partner’s. “JUST A LITTLE WHOOOAAANNNNNNNGGGGGHHH!”
So focused on Babe and Gabby was she that Lily failed to notice Rose’s absence on the far corner of the squared circle. The darkness of this ignorance was banished in an instant when the Smartest Girl in the Room snatched hold of the champ’s ankles and ripped her from the apron with a single savage yank! There was an ugly THWHUNK as Lily’s chin collided with the mat, followed by outraged jeers from the crowd when Evans caught her around the hips in a Waistlock. Paying absolutely no attention to the fans or the nerdly outrage of Al Carpenter, Rose hoisted the Star Strider up Wheelbarrow-style, swung her around in a half circle and BWUNG-THUNKED her down chest-first atop the steel guardrail. Burlingame ‘OOOOFFFFFHHHED!’ and would’ve slopped in half over the encroaching metal if Rose hadn’t slipped an arm through her legs and dumped her into the laps of half a dozen FAWNatics!
“Go ahead and pretend to help her up, losers.” Rose snapped. “But if ANY of you does anything to keep her out of action I will track you down and smash every one of your action fig--”
A roar from those assembled returned Evans’s attention to the ring just in time to watch Babcock BWUUUNG her partner back-first into the Beach Bomber’s corner. Though it didn’t break the Rear Naked Choke it did allow Babe to curl her right arm around the back of her attacker’s head. In the next instant she took several lumbering steps forward, hopped into the air and dropped to her tush to THWHUNK Gabby’s chin against the crown of her skull. Blown loose from her moorings by the Backpack Stunner, Mendoza landed stretched out in a sweaty starfish, which wouldn’t have been a problem if Babcock hadn’t hooked her legs behind the knees and leaned back for a weary…
BACKPACK STUNNER:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=o5EiejCM6Is
ONE…
TWO…
THRENOOOOOOOO!
Gabby pulled her leg loose and slid out from under her resilient adversary. Only vaguely aware of her partner’s current predicament, a red-faced Babe sucked in several deep, rasping breaths before forcing herself to a seat. “Sorry about that, Lil.” she croaked without really looking at her corner. “Ready to drive this rocket for a--” Babcock finally noted the champ’s absence and more importantly, the smirking presence of Rose Evans on the wrong side of the ring. Grimacing unpleasantly, the Beach Bunny got to her feet and stamped over to the empty stretch of canvas. “All right, wiseass.” she growled at Rose. “What’d you do with Lily?”
Evans jerked a thumb over her shoulder. “Tossed her in with the other trash. You’re more than welcome to join her if you’d like… you just have to go through AAARRGGGHHH LEGGO!”
More than a little tired of the other blonde’s smarmy shyt, Babcock reached over the top rope, snatched a double handful of Evans’s hair and PULLED as hard as she could!
Keening like a klaxon siren, Rose scrambled onto the apron and hurried to her feet. “Get her off!” she squealed to Al Carpenter. “Get this tramp OFF!”
Forced to act out of duty rather than any desire to reward Rose for her meddling, Al strode up behind the struggling blondes and laid a hand on Babcock’s shoulder. “C’mon Babe, let her go. Rose, stop screwing around and get back to your NNNGGGHHHH!”
Rose snatched a double handful of Babe’s hair, pulled her close and stepped off the apron. Now a Hot Shot was bad enough by itself, but a Hot Shot that snapped the victim back into an unsuspecting official was all the worse, as Babe and Al discovered when the former THWHUNKED the later with an impromptu Headbutt to the chin. Carpenter didn’t go out, he just rocked back on his heels, wheeled around and crumpled to one knee with both hands pressed to his face.
“That’s right.” Rose’s face lit up in a cold smile as she watched all the pieces come together. “Dance, puppets, dance!” Neither Babcock or Carpenter seemed much inclined to listen, so the Smartest Girl in the Room hopped back onto the apron and snagged the top rope in both hands. Then she leapt, landed up top and took flight again, leading with a pair of boots aimed straight at Babe’s che-- Babcock spun aside at the last second, leaving Rose to hit the next target in line, the freshly risen, totally unsuspecting Gabby Mendoza. Blown off her feet by the Missile Dropkick, Gabby went rolling across the canvas and stopped near the far side of the squared circle in a groaning heap.
Aware that she’d made a rare, but grievous error, Rose hurried to her feet and rounded on the rising ex-lifeguard. “You slippery little shyt, you’re gonna regOOOFFFFFFHHHH!”
Babcock hit her with a hard-charging Shoulderblock and kept right on moving, the ballistic little battler chugging away full speed ahead until she BWUUUNGED Evans into the turnbuckles. A pair of follow-up Shoulderblocks meant Rose was nice and winded when Babcock tipped her head back and CRAAACKED a Bytch Slap across her cheek. She caught Evans’s face in her hand and gave it a hard squeeze. “If you were half as smart as you claimed,” she jostled the brat’s head from side to side, “you never would’ve screwed with me.” There was no pithy comeback for that little bon mot, so Babe jerked Rose down into a Front Facelock, spun around and hopped into a seat on the top turnbuckle. A quick glance told her that Carpenter, Lily and Gabby seemed to be recovering, so the Siren of Surf & Sand braced her feet against the middle buckle and pushed off in a wide, swinging circle NOOOOOOOO!
Rose wrapped her arms around the other blonde’s thighs and kept right on spinning, all the better to set Babcock back at square one. Wrenching herself loose with a furious shriek, Evans clouted Babe across the jaw, then reared back and THWHUMPED a straight right hand into her crotch. “GET READY, GABZ!” the Bratty Brain barked over one shoulder. “THIS ONE’S ALL YOURS!”
REALLY BURSTING YOUR BUBBLE:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=LNAAVssDrVE
The Smartest Girl in the Room sent Babcock high into the air, and Gabby was ready to meet her, leaping and grabbing the back of the blonde’s noggin with both hands. But more importantly, the Babyfaced Killer drew her knees up to Babe’s chest as she fell back, and though Mendoza hit the mat first, it was instantly obvious that the worst of the impact went THROUGH Gabby and into Babe, who was sent flopping to the canvas and left convulsing. The lovely Latina quickly rolled over on her hip, draping herself across the lifeguard’s chest and hooking a leg...
ONE...
Out in the crowd, the reigning and defending Lightweight champion had finally managed to pull herself up to her knees. Leaning against the railing, her eyes caught sight of events in the ring, and she began to scramble up and over the steel...
TWO...
Landing on the other side of the railing, Burlingame stumbled to reach the ring. But while she might be one of the fastest and most graceful women in the industry, even her speed and agility has limits. The brunette only had enough time to reach the apron before Al Carpenter’s hand landed the final slap.
THREE!!!!!!!!!
“Ladies and gentlemen,” the announcer bellowed, “your winners, via pinfall... BAAARRREEELLLYYY LEEEGGGAAALLL!!!!!”
The toll of the bell seemed to momentarily sap the adrenaline from Burlingame’s body, Lily leaning against the edge of the ring, spent. Gabby, meanwhile, rose up to her knees and spat into her hand her used up wad of gum. Holding the confectionary between her thumb and index finger, the Babyfaced Killer held it off to the right of Lily’s bowed noggin, glancing briefly back and forth between the two. “Whattaya know?” the victorious brunette grinned. “They could be related!”
But then, Gabby looked down at the still insensate Babcock.
“You, on the other hand...” Mendoza’s free hand went to the left leghole of Babe’s suit. “I think you still need to learn a lesson in sticking your nose where it doesn’t belong.” With that, Gabby slipped her gum inside Babe’s swimsuit, pushing against the fabric to smush the sugary wad into her crotch. Behind her, Rose stood with slightly parted stems, waiting for Burlingame to look up...
... and when she did, the Smartest Girl in the Room ran her hands back and forth, across her tummy.
“My belt,” Rose mouthed. “Mine.”
Eager to train their attention on the Siren of Surf & Sand and the Star Strider, the March to War crowd sprang up and cheered uproariously out when the lights went down. From within that swirling, anticipatory gloom came a thumping drum and a matched set of snapping fingers, the two bits of percussion bouncing to and fro in a rat-a-tat riff. A keening guitar note joined the beat and a few seconds later the situation got brighter in no small part due to the tongue of flame that licked at the base of the ramp. As the note held steady, the fire set off on a beeline for the top of the ramp.
The wick shrank in time with the arrival of more guitars and an Earth-shattering KA-BOOM of red pyro that almost swallowed a mash-up of Comeback Kid and One More Minute. From the center of this flash and flame a pair of figures emerged, shooting up from the floor to land flawlessly before the capacity crowd.
BABE BABCOCK:
LILY BURLINGAME:
Strolling coolly from that brand spankin‘ new crater, Babe pumped a fist for the crowd while Lily patted the golden faceplate of the belt snapped around her waist. After a quick nod, blonde and brunette bumped fists and flew down the ramp in a blur of black, red and white. For tonight’s row with Barely Legal the champ wore gleaming black bottoms accented by swirling galaxies of stars done in red and white. Her top was halter-style sports bra done in an identical scheme, the red and white seeming to shimmer and twine with her every move. Kneepads were matching black and also sported the galaxy motif, white on the left and red on the right. Her hair, though free of the mask, was still pulled back in a long, sweeping ponytail. Babe wore a similar two piece, though hers was dark blue and black, the sworls designed to look like whirlpools and tidal waves. Her boots and knee pads were both gleaming white and her blonde hair was pulled back in a loose ponytail that matched her partner’s.
More than a little eager to get vengeance for the attack earlier in the evening, the Beach Babe and the Girl That Gravity Forgot tore down the ramp then leapt from the floor to the apron to the top rope in the span between heartbeats. Bouncing from it as casually as the terminally grounded stepped off the curb, Lily hooked a sharp turn to the left, while Babe went right and both ladies leapt from the mat to the top rope for stereo back flips that posted them up near the center of the ring.
Pounding fists for an earth-shattering KABOOM, blonde and brunette turned to the malevolent millennials with Babe taking point for her squad. “You gutless pieces of crap are going to pay for trying to hold me hostage!”
Rose arched an eyebrow. “Try? Bytch Face, there is no try. We got EXACTLY what we wanted. And now we get to kick your sandy ass… again.”
Babcock would’ve gone at her then if Lily hadn’t angled an arm across her chest. “Let it go, Babe. Words are all she’s got.” Burlingame said. “Well, that and a soft little gut perfect for breaking falls. Isn’t that right, Rosie?” Evans snarled, started to step forward before a glance from Carpenter slowed her roll. Lily winked as she led Babcock to the Bombers’ corner. “See ya soon, brainiac.”
The speakers crackled back to life, pumping out Charli XCX’s “Famous”, much to the sudden and vociferous condemnation of the Orlando faithful.
“FAMOUS”:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=O7Mabm90wuE )
“First,” the announcer resumed, “hailing from Buffalo, New York... She stands five feet three inches tall and weighs in at one hundred and twenty-one pounds. She is the Smartest Girl in the Room, ROSE EVANS! And her partner, from Irving, Texas... She stands five feet five inches tall and weighs in at one hundred and twenty-two pounds. Ladies and gentlemen, the Babyfaced Killer, GABBY MENDOZA! Together, they ARE... BAAARRREEELLLYYY LEEEGGGAAALLL!!!!!”
ROSE EVANS:
GABBY MENDOZA:
A few moments after that introduction, two lovely young ladies emerge from backstage—with an emphasis on “YOUNG.” Evans and Mendoza strolled down to the ring virtually side by side—Gabby trailed perhaps a step behind—to a decidedly lustful reaction from the capacity crowd. Rose—the shorter and more fair skinned of the two—looked fairly impassive as she approached the ring, intently eying down the two women she was about to go to war against. Her eyes never registered the presence of the crowd or wavered from the ring. Gabby—just a little taller with a darker complexion—seemed a little more aware of her surroundings, and possibly even less impressed with the fans around ringside. But, if she was scowling, the effect was somewhat diluted by the periodic bubbles that Mendoza blew with her gum.
Both women were dressed the exact same way: adorned in black lace panties underneath plaid mini-skirts and matching black bustiers that, with neither of these women likely to be mistaken for Hailey Kennedy, gave their bosoms an extremely flattering boost. Both sets of well-shaped legs were encased in thigh high black nylons along with white boots. Climbing onto the apron, Rose and Gabby slipped one leg through the ropes, bending deep at the waist as they swept their upper bodies toward the ring…
… only to stop halfway, their faces sooooooo close to coming into contact.
Mendoza and Evans brushed noses, exchanging an Eskimo kiss, before pulling the rest of the way into the ring. And once the referee had checked out both sides for foreign objects, Evans slide back out onto the apron, taking up her station in the Barely Legal corner. While she had a few more words with Gabby, Rose leaned against the buckles, letting the Babyfaced Killer massage her shoulders as she waited to see whether blonde or brunette would start out against.
No deliberation when the bell sounded, Rose came forward for her team while the Beach Bombers countered with Babe. Sniffing with disdain at what she saw as an obvious stall tactic by the terrified champion, Evans stamped to the middle of the ring and offered Babcock an imperious ‘off with you’ sort of hand wave. “You can just turn your Baywatch Dinner Theatre ass around right now, sweetheart.” she told the slender blonde. “I came here to deal with a champion, not her poolgirOOOFFFFHHH!”
The Siren of Surf & Sand hit her like a tidal wave, Babcock laying in a deluge of Forearm Smashes as she started repaying the beating Evans and Mendoza had laid on her earlier in the month. Caught flatfooted and gawping by the furious assault, Rose didn’t manage to raise a defense until her back was almost smudging the cables. “BREAK!” the stunned brainiac hollered the instant she careened into the strands. “Check that pig’s hoofs for rolls of quarters, there’s no way she hits that UUNNNNGGHH!”
Babcock stepped in, pivoted on her left foot and THWHUMPED the broadest, sturdiest part of her right thigh up into the ingénue’s tummy. Al stepped forward, meaning to tell her to offer the break, but the words were still in his mouth when the red-clad blonde snatched hold of her foe’s wrist and sent her racing to the far side of the ring. Babe followed less than half a dozen steps behind and she certainly would’ve taken Evans’s head off with her Can Opener if the other woman hadn’t cinched an arm over the top rope, bringing her to a dead stop. Rose bailed immediately thereafter, fightin’ pride taking a backseat to strategy while she regrouped from the idiot’s onslaught.
“KEEP HER IN THE RING!” Evans barked at the official as soon as she’d caught her breath. “I MEAN IT, CARPENTER! KEEP THAT SEA MONKEY ON A LEASH OR--”
“ROSE, LOOK OUT!” She twisted her head in the direction of Gabby’s voice just in time to watch Lily leap from the apron at a dead run. Legs spread in a predatory ‘V’ the lightweight champion ‘smecked’ her stems shut around Rose’s noggin and twisted her hips to fling the malign millennial off her feet courtesy of a Hurricanrana.
APRON HURRICANRANA:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=jTIsyL8XNY0
Burlingame popped up, raised her hands to shoulder level and backed off without so much as a word of complaint to the barking zebra. “Better keep your head on a swivel, Rosie.” the Star Strider chided as she headed back to her corner. “Or Babe and I are gonna have you two idiots seeing stars.”
Back in the ring Babe noted Evans’s position and ran through a couple quick calculations. The math was just about right when a roar from the crowd alerted her to incoming danger. Excellent timing too, if they’d been a half second later Mendoza would’ve dented the back of her skull with a Clothesline. As it was she dipped beneath the strike so late she felt the breeze of the brunette’s forearm flick at her hair. Gabby stopped on a dime, whirled around and THWHACK! Babe sprang up in a gorgeous vertical leap that ended with the point of her right knee colliding with her attacker’s chin.
SHORT-RANGE CAN OPENER @ 00:50
www.youtube.com/watch?v=WZJGqi1-zzM
Staggered by the short-range Can Opener, Mendoza could do nothing but come along for the ride when Babcock grabbed her by the nape of the neck and charged ropes where Rose initially bailed. Hitting the brakes at the last second, Babe hurled the Babyfaced Killer over the top rope and watched with clear delight as she flattened her rising partner with an involuntary Flying Crossbody.
Her desire for vengeance in no way quashed by this fast start, Babe made to head out to the floor only to have Al interpose himself between her and the ropes. “Back off Babe. I need to get those two up and separated.”
“C’mon Al, you know what they did to me!” she grumbled.
“I do. Which is why I’m going to get one of them back in here as quick as I can. Now stand back and lemme do my job.”
Babcock sighed but made no further comment. Considering the issue settled, the ref strode over to the ropes, leaned over and wedged a good half of his lanky frame between the top and middle strands. “On your feet you two. I want Rose in the ring and Gabby back in the corner posthaste. If I think you’re sandbagging me I’ll end this thing right now and make sure neither of you is in that title match next month!”
The Smartest Girl in the Room had tuned him out until that threat about March to War. That got her back to full verticality so fast it was almost eerie. “That is a GROSS abuse of power and I won’t stand for it! Threaten us like that again and I’ll OH CRAPPNNNNGGGGHHH!”
Tired of waiting for Carpenter to do things the polite way, Babe ran to the far side of the squared circle, charged down her own back-trail and somersaulted over the oblivious official at a frightening rate of speed. Gabby’d taken the Can Opener all by her lonesome so it was only fitting that Rose soaked up the worst the Cannonball had to offer. Knocked flat on her back by the gorgeous Plancha, Rose was reduced to blinking up at the lights in wide-eyed astonishment while Babe scrambled to her feet and addressed the front row FAWNatics.
CANNONBALL:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=qByEPi9W9Gk
“YOU SEE THAT?” she swept an arm to better indicate the human flotsam and jetsam bobbing in her wake. “THAT’S WHAT HAPPENS WHEN BRATS HAVE TO FIGHT FAIR!”
Though the count was still fresh and she yearned to bounce Gabby’s forehead off the railing more than a few times, Babe focused her attention on Rose, scraping her off the floor and bundling her under the bottom rope before Al could get any more strident in his counting. Hand on the middle rope, she boosted herself onto the apron where she paused to glance at her corner. “Thanks for the assist earlier. You mind if I keep hammering this idiot?”
“Be my guest.” Lily replied at once. “You deserve it. So does she.”
“Damn right she does.”
Unable to keep quiet even when it was in her best interest, Rose Evans sat up and muttered, “The only thing I deserve is that Lightweight Championship. And it’ll be around my waist soon enough, bytch-facOOOFFFHHH!” Babe stepped through the ropes, braced her right foot on the bottom strand and used it to launch herself into a ground-skimming Flying Crossbody that THWHUMPED against Rose’s chest. Truncated or not, it kept the mouthy blonde pressed flat long enough for Carpenter to count off…
KIDDIE SPLASH:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=ngwPXIHARi8
ONE…
TWO…
Rose fought loose and sat up, an ugly scowl marring her pretty features. “Nice try, pool skimmer.” she snarled. “But it’ll take a lot more than some community college dropout to keep me from my desUUUGGGHHHH FAAAAHHHK!” Rose’s sass once again devolved into breathless grunting when Babcock sat down behind her and slipped both legs around her waist.
Ankles locked, palms planted flat, Babe pushed up off her tush and squeeeeeeeeeeeeeezed until Evans tossed her head back and wailed. “How’s that feel, brat? Huh? How’s that feel? Gonna think twice about jumping me next time, aren’t you?” the Beachcomber snarled.
“Thuuuu…. there won’t BE a next time.” Rose rasped. “Gabby and I are gonna end you tonNNNGGGGHH!” Babcock set herself down so she could PWAK Forearm Smashes across the base of her victim’s neck. “Keep it up, genius. Every time you run your damned mouth I am going to make you SCREAM. Understand?” The trapped tyro didn’t immediately offer a rebuttal, which Babe took as a very good sign.” Rising up on her hands for another prolonged squeeze, she looked to the ref and chirped, “Ask her, please. I can feel her ribs starting to go.”
“How about it, Ro...” the official began to ask, but the question was cut off by a snarl of defiance, what few syllables which were intelligible not being fit to be repeated in polite society.
Sensing that a submission would not be forthcoming no matter what the condition of Evans’ ribs might be, Babcock broke her Scissors and yanked the Smartest Girl in the Room up to her feet by a handful of hair. Ready to keep the fight going and on her terms, the blonde beach babe took hold of Rose’s wrist, set her feet and sent the Barely Legal brat on her way with an Irish Whip...
... or tried to. Instead, Evans proved to have at least a little bit of fight left in her, reversing the Whip. As Babe rebounded off the cables, the brains of Barely Legal raised her right arm, intending to catch Babcock across the throat with a Clothesline. But as Evans took a step forward, Babe lowered her head, ducking under the scythe and continuing on her way into the opposite ropes. With even more of a head of steam behind her now, the Beach Bunny prepared to leave her feet and catch Rose with a decisive Leg Lariat...
LEG LARIAT:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=ljpsnjziai4
... but that head of steam was brought to an abrupt halt by a sharp yank, Babe letting out a howl of pain as Gabby Mendoza snatched a handful of flaxen tresses and pulled back. Babcock had little choice but to spin around and face the other Barely Legal brat, but she could do a little more than that. Indeed, balling her right fist, the blonde took a swing, hoping to knock Mendoza’s block off, or at the very least drop her from the apron.
Unfortunately, Gabby proved one step ahead of her, hopping down to the floor of her own accord. “That’s what I thooOOOOOUUUUUNNNGGGGGHHHHHH!” Babe began to assert, until an Uppercut parted her thighs from behind, Rose Evans demonstrating herself smart enough to take advantage of this particular opening. With Babcock’s legs quaking, Evans slipped her head under the lifeguard’s left arm, wrapped her arms around Babe’s waist and ripped her foe off her feet. Bridging back, Rose DROVE Babcock’s head and shoulders into the canvas with a wicked Saito Suplex, what she called She Loves Me Not.
SHE LOVES ME NOT:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=T8XPR6iRv_Q
The Smartest Girl in the Room then grabbed hold of Babe’s right ankle with both hands and dragged her opponent into the Barely Legal corner. Releasing one hand from that grip, Evans reached behind her, allowing Gabby Mendoza to slap her hand and make herself legal. However, instead of departing the ring, Rose secured a new grip on Babe’s leg, which she used to roll the blonde over to her belly. Stepping over that well-shaped gam, Evans sunk into a deep crouch, securing a Single Leg Crab.
SINGLE LEG BOSTON CRAB:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=vnzGtY2MOm8
Across the ring, Lily Burlingame began to register a protest, but she soon had reason to do more when Gabby claimed possession of Babcock’s left leg and applied a Half Crab of her very own! That proved enough to convince the Girl That Gravity Forgot that words would NOT be enough, and the diminutive brunette launched herself over the top rope...
Now, it’s quite possible that the reverberation of the canvas would have tipped the referee off that someone else had entered the ring. But Rose had a nice view of the intrusion, facing the champ’s corner, and she promptly brought Burlingame’s trespass to the zebra’s attention. He immediately moved to prevent Lily from involving herself--and Rose and Gabby immediately went to work giving the respective foot in their possession savage twists and turns, Babe forced to shriek in agony, until she could wrap a hand around the bottom rope...
... but the referee was still engaged with a protesting Burlingame, giving the Barely Legal duo considerably more than five seconds to continue with their not even remotely legal tactics.
With Burlingame finally ushered back toward her corner, Evans tossed Babcock’s leg aside and made her departure. Mendoza rose out of her crouch, but she kept hold of Babe’s ankle, first yanking the blonde away from the ropes and then hoisting the gam high into the air. Reversing course, the Babyfaced Killer SLAMMED the Beach Bunny’s knee into the thinly padded plywood, Babe letting out a yelp and drawing the wounded knee up to her chest, clutching it with both hands.
Dropping to her tush behind the reeling blonde, Gabby pulled Babe up to a seated position before slipping her legs around Babcock’s waist. First, she placed a boot against the lifeguard’s left thigh, forcing that leg down before Mendoza crossed her ankles between Babe’s stems. The deceptively cruel brunette then slipped her arms underneath Babcock’s wings, applying a Full Nelson before she rocked back, lifting the Beach Bunny into the air...
... and then dropping her back down, brutally, bum first. Gabby added a couple more Keister Bounces to the barrage before relinquishing the nelson and then taking a page out of Babe’s earlier book, pressing her palms flat against the mat and pushing HERSELF into the air as she bore down on her Bodyscissors. Unlike Babcock earlier, however, Mendoza didn’t demand the referee check for a submission--she was too preoccupied with her Hubba Bubba. But that didn’t prevent the official from asking if Babe wanted to call it a night.
“Not a channnnnnnggggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhh.....” Babcock gasped as Gabby dropped back to her tush, the Babyfaced Killer’s bubble having grown to considerable size as she leaned forward--until it reached beyond its structurally integrity, a loud ‘POP!’ going off right beside Babe’s right ear.
Breaking her Bodyscissors, Gabby climbed to her feet and tugged Babe up with a handful of hair. The Babyfaced Killer turned her back to the Barely Legal corner as she tucked the blonde’s bowed noggin under her left arm. She then grabbed a handful of red fabric around Babe’s right hip, popped HER hips, and executed a stunningly crisp Snap Suplex.
SNAP SUPLEX:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=hE2qR9IuF2o
While Babcock’s back struck the canvas hard, perhaps the worst part of the maneuver was that Gabby’s proximity to the Barely Legal corner had led to the blonde’s lower legs striking the ropes, each on either side of the ring-post and the turnbuckles. And alas, perhaps worse STILL was the Babyfaced Killer pressing the sole of her boot down across Babe’s windpipe as she reached out to tag the Smartest Girl in the Room back into the contest.
Mendoza only lifted her foot once Rose was in the ring, the brunette sending a cheeky, supportive swat to Rose’s rump as she departed--and Evans quickly answered in kind, lest the official choose to interpret the gesture as a tag. Hair-hauling Babcock to her feet, the brains of Barely Legal backed the blonde into the ropes with a couple of forearms to the chest, then bodied in and claimed a wrist. Setting her feet, Rose attempted to usher Babe along into the opposite ropes, but much as Evans had done to her earlier in the contest, the Beach Bunny reversed the Irish Whip. Unlike Babe earlier, Rose failed to prevent the lifeguard from catching her on the rebound, Babcock scooping the Smartest Girl in the Room off her feet...
... but only because Rose had WANTED to be caught.
As Babe hauled her up, Evans caught the blonde’s head between her legs in a scissors, then whipped her upper body around Babe’s back. At that point, Rose let one of her legs slip away from the Beach Bunny’s noggin, hoping her boot around Babcock’s calf as her other leg pressed down against the back of the blonde’s skull. Meanwhile, Evans brought both her hands to clamp around Babe’s right wrist, pulling the limb away from her side as she fully cinched in her Rose Vine.
ROSE VINE:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=gtPdQde3r2A
Almost immediately, the official dropped to one knee beside the entwined duo and asked if Babcock wanted to give it up. The blonde lifeguard hissed out a refusal, while a smugly smirked Rose waved Babe’s captive hand in the direction of a helpless Lily Burlingame, the Lightweight Champion’s arm nowhere near long enough to reach out and make the tag.
“Don’t bother taking notes, bytch face!” Rose sneered at the helpless, fuming champion. “The things I do to you will make this look remedWHOOOAAAHH!”
Sensing her attacker’s attention elsewhere, Babe dipped, twisted and rolled in a single sinuous motion that put her squarely on Evans’s six. Babcock palmed her foe’s shoulders, leapt up and landed with her legs framing Rose’s noggin, Electric Chair style. Arms spread wide, she lowered her head and tumbled into a tight little curl that ended with her in a comfortable seat while Rose’s rump pointed straight at the lights. Corralling the terrible tyro’s thighs under her arms, Babe leaned back and nodded along for the…
ONE…
TWO…
The Smartest Girl in the Room bucked free with a full second to spare, not that you’d have known it by the expression of horrified shock plastered to her patrician features. Quicker to rise even after escaping the Victory Roll, Evans ruined Babe’s return to verticality with a stiff Kneelift to the belly and a THWHUMPING overhand Forearm Smash delivered across her shoulders.
“Should’ve tapped out before I noticed you were alive, Baywatch.” Rose growled as she laid claim to Babcock’s wrist. “Now I’m gonna take you out to the deep water.”
With that she stepped back, dropped a shoulder and slung Babe at a neutral set of ropes. In no position to alter her course, the Siren of Surf & Sand hit the cables back-first and charged back at Evans, who’d thrown herself into the opposite set of strands. Picking up speed as she closed the gap, Rose leapt, twisted sideways in mid-air and “OOOOFFFFFFHH!” Babe did some leaping of her own, only she led with her right knee, the point of which THWHUMPED deep into her opponent’s midsection. Gutted by the Can Opener, Evans hit the deck with a breathless grunt and sucked wind while a weary former lifeguard started toward her corner on all fours.
Tag rope in one hand, Lily climbed onto the bottom rope and leaaaaaaaaaaaaaaned forward as far as her considerable balance would allow. “C’MON BABE, YOU’RE ALMOST THERE!” she bellowed. “JUST A LITTLE FARTHER AND I’LL CLEAN UP THIS TRASH!”
Gabby was also mounted on the second rope, though she was pointing into the ring rather than asking for a tag. “GET UP, ROSIE! KNOCK THE SAND RAT ON HER ASS, DON’T LET HER TAG OUT!”
Rose clambered to boot leather while Mendoza was talking and even in her slightly nauseated state she knew she couldn’t reach Gabs before Babcock reached her corner. Her eyes narrowed slightly. There *was* another possibility however. Forcing the hurt to the back of her mind, Evans raced at, then beyond Babe to knock Burlingame from her perch with a ‘OOOOOOOOOHHHHHHH!’ the FAWNatics cringed in sympathetic hurt when Lily hopped up (holding the top rope in both hands for support) and angled hard to the right to THWHACK a Roundhouse across Rose’s forehead.
Eyes set on ‘TILT’, a staggering Rose turned around and made her escape directly into the path of Babe Babcock, who’d regained her feet just in time to drive both knees into the other blonde’s chest. “Sorry about the wait, partner.” Babe huffed as she ‘clapped’ Lily’s outstretched hand. “Ready to make up for lost time?”
“You know it. You thinking Depth Charge?”
“Damned right I am.”
Babe slapped Rose across the face for good measure, then stuffed a shoulder into her tummy and muscled her into a seat on the top turnbuckle. Moving even faster than usual to accommodate the referee’s count, Babcock scurried onto the middle rope and immediately hopped straight up. A pair of beach-tanned stems ‘smecked’ around Rose’s neck and then she was spiraling through the air courtesy of Babe’s Avalanche ‘Rana. The Beach Bunny had rolled under the bottom rope by the time Rose THWHAMMED against the mat, not that the wide-eyed blonde noticed anything other than her throbbing spine.
This single mindedness continued right up until the moment Lily vaulted onto the top rope and launched herself into the heavens. Knees pulled to chest level, the Lightweight Champion twirled through one and a quarter rotations and stretched out full length a whole heartbeat before she THWHAMMED down on Evans’s exposed tummy. Crushed at stern and bow by the rapid-fire combination of maneuvers, Rose only groaned when Burlingame hooked the far leg and drew it close for….
ONE…
TWO…
THRNOOOO!
The Star Strider relinquished the cover and pulled clear just in time for Gabby to bury a Double Axehandle in her partner’s tummy. “DAMMIT! Sorry Rose, I didn’t NNNNNGGGGHHHHH!”
Lily Burlingame wasn’t the biggest fan of cheap shots, but she didn’t hesitate to smack the taste out of Gabby’s petulant mouth. “Back to your corner, Froot Stripe.” she taunted. “You can spell the Mathlete if she can crawl to safety.”
Already close to the action because of the near-fall, Al Carpenter placed a hand on Mendoza’s shoulder and said, “C’mon Gabby, you know the--” she swatted him aside and hopped over her prone partner, but in so doing she left herself vulnerable to the Toe Kick Burlingame planted in her navel. Mendoza doubled over, so Lily hit her with a second Toe Kick, this one hitting square between the eyes. That rocked the Baby-Faced Killer back on her heels, meaning Lily had the perfect opportunity to hop up and plant her left foot on the stunned brunette’s left thigh. In the next instant Burlingame’s other foot arced up and around to CRAAACK off her opponent’s temple.
Gabby stumbled backward, tripped over Rose and went down on her butt with a thump that would’ve been funny if any of the women in the ring felt like laughing. Still determined to get the interloper back to her corner, Carpenter took Gabby by the arm and tried to help her stand. Up and at’em, Gabby. I don’t want to disqualif-- oh, c’mon Lil!”
Burlingame snatched Gabby at trunks and tresses and charged her toward a neutral side of the ring. Slamming on the brakes just as she reached the point of no return, the Interstellar Angel hurled Mendoza over the top rope and watched long enough to see her THWHAP against the thin-blue mats surrounding the ring. “Now that we’ve dealt with Violet Beauregard…” Lily turned around and leveled a grin on Rose. “We can see to Veruca Sault.”
Only vaguely aware of her friend’s muffed interference, Evans sat up, looked to the Barely Legal corner and frowned when she didn’t see Gabby. “What did you do with her, bytch face?” she demanded of the champ.
“Don’t worry about that. Worry about what I’m gonna do to you.”
Rose peeled herself off the canvas, made a few minor adjustments to her skirt and rolled her eyes. “Please. I could beat you with one hand tied behind my back.”
“One day I’ll let you prove that, doofus. For right now why don’t you step up and fight? Try not to lose on your way ov--” Burlingame shut up as she caught a blonde kick aimed between her thighs. She’d barely processed the near miss when Evans sprang off her plant foot and whipped it at the brunette’s skull in an Enzugiri of her own.
“OOOFFFHHHH!” Lily dipped her head in the nick of time, leaving the Smartest Girl in the Room to land awkwardly on her tummy. “Don’t think you’re clever, idiot.” Rose huffed. “I’ll crush you OOOHHH F*CK NO! KEEP AWAY FROM EEERRRGGHHH!”
Lily stepped onto her foe’s thighs, grabbed her ankles and folded Rose’s shins into place against her own. Then she reached down and smacked at Evans’s ribs until the blonde was forced to defend herself. Snatching both wrists in an instant, Burlingame looked over at Babe, who was smiling broadly. “Hey, you mind if I give this brat a view from the top of the Watchtower?”
“Oh please, I insist. Take her all the way up!”
With Babe’s blessing, Lily dipped her knees and rolled onto her back, hauling Rose into a spine-wrenching Romero Stretch.
What do you say, Rose?” Al Carpenter asked, but received for his troubles a vehement shake of the head from the Smartest Girl in the Room.
“The real deal from flat-chested Pamela Anderson over there wouldn’t make me quit,” Rose managed to hiss, her eyes closed and teeth gritted. “If you think Cherry’s knock off...”
“REF!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”
That shout had come not from Rose or from Lily, but rather from the Babyfaced Killer across the ring, Gabby Mendoza hopping as she pointed toward the Beach Bombers’ corner--and, more specifically, toward the top turnbuckle. For, having apparently taken exception to the moniker Evans had given her, Babe had climbed her way up top and launched toward the Barely Legal brat with tucked knees, dropping them harshly on the suspended Rose’s chest.
Evans hit the deck, dropped by Burlingame who herself offered a slight groan of pain from taking Babcock’s weight striking her opponent. But the Girl That Gravity Forgot still proved quicker to her feet, reaching her corner almost as soon as Babe had slipped through the ropes, and slapping the blonde’s offered hand. Advancing on the rising Rose, the Beach Babe grabbed hold of her opponent’s left wrist before slipping around behind Evans, drawing her own arm across her throat. Babcock then slipped her free arm underneath Rose’s tied up wing, her hand pressing against the back of Evans’ neck. The blonde then popped her hips, bridging back and dropping the Smartest Girl on the Room down HARD on her head, hard enough to momentarily half Rose’s IQ.
SURFING SUPLEX:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=TAWFbOOO6dQ
Climbing back to her feet, Babe wasted little time in approaching the splattered Evans and peeling her off the mat. Taking a particular delight in the Barely Legal brat’s suddenly vacant eyes, the former lifeguard stuffed Rose’s head under her left arm, but almost as quickly rolled the back of her foe’s neck up onto her shoulder. In the next instant, Babcock kicked up her left leg before diving forward, using her Shorebreaker to SLAM Rose’s mug into the deck and switch her lights out very likely for the rest of the night.
SHOREBREAKER:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=TBCY6wPNtuQ
Shoveling the insensate brat over to her back, Babe dropped across her chest, reaching to hook a leg and secure the...
ONE...
TWO...
THRENOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!
Only a diving Double Axehandle from Gabby Mendoza kept Barely Legal alive in the match, and only the timely intervention of the referee kept the Babyfaced Killer from doing more to improve Barely Legal’s outlook. While Al Carpenter ushered the brunette from the ring, Babe shook off the effects of the blow and heading to her corner, slapping Lily’s outstretched hand loud enough to be sure that the official could hear it. But with Carpenter’s back still turned, Babcock didn’t depart. Instead, she turned back to her splayed opponent and dropped to all fours alongside her. Not missing a beat, Burlingame deftly climbed onto the blonde’s back and used that abbreviated perch to launch a beautiful Corkscrew Moonsault, her tummy ‘THWAP!’ing down across Rose’s abdomen.
CORKSCREW MOONSAULT @0:52:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=TBCY6wPNtuQ
By the time Carpenter managed to get a protesting Gabby out of the ring, Babe had very nearly finished sliding through the ropes herself. For her part, Lily was back up and at ‘em--or, more accurately, up and at the nearest neutral corner, claiming a double fisted grip on the top rope and propelling herself up from inside the ring to the top turnbuckle. As the former Cherry Bomb raised her arms triumphantly overhead, the FAWNatics as one rose to their feet, eagerly awaiting the brunette taking to the heavens like few others could.
CHERRY WARHEAD:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=jNdHhtx-Kog
The acrobatic descent was a thing of beauty. The landing was anything but, as Evans managed to summon enough of her mental faculties to think of drawing her knees up to her chest and replacing the soft, yielding crashpad Burlingame had wanted with considerably bumpier terrain. The Girl that Gravity Forgot went back into the air, but with considerably less grace and beauty as she tumbled over to her back, hugging an arm tight to her stomach as her boots drummed the mat. Rose, meanwhile, struggled to roll over to her belly, but she was able to start crawling toward a bouncing Babyfaced Killer while Burlingame continued to have difficulty with simply breathing.
Eventually, Lily managed to sit up, and then rise as her far as her knees. Alas, by that time Rose Evans had tagged out to her partner... but while Mendoza was still drawing her body through the ropes, Burlingame launched herself into a forward roll, coming out of the tumble to dive toward her corner...
... and slap her hand down across Babe Babcock’s!
The Beach Babe vaulted over the top rope in a manner that would have made her partner proud. Witnessing the escape, Gabby began to sprint toward her opponent, but the blonde charged as well, leaping into a Dropkick that SLAMMED her bare soles into Mendoza’s bosom, dropping the brunette to the canvas. Babcock was up quickly, scooping up Gabby and swinging her foe’s body through the air as she dropped to a knee, connecting with a brutal Tilt-a-Whirl Backbreaker.
TILT-A-WHIRL BACKBREAKER:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=lumuK4nM6nw
Raising off her knee, Babe slipped her arm underneath Gabby’s left arm and pulled the brunette up as well. With both women vertical, one sagging against the other, Babcock effortlessly transitioned her grip on her opponent into a Half Nelson. Reaching her right arm around Mendoza’s waist, the blonde bridged back, ripping the Babyfaced Killer from her moorings and DRIVING Gabby’s head and shoulders into the mat with her Tequila Sunrise Suplex. And she held the bridge through...
TEQUILA SUNRISE SUPLEX:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=WrWHldSaq4A
ONE...
TWO...
THRNOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!
Gabby bucked loose, and as she spilled over to her belly, Babe turned to look at Al, hopefully raising three fingers. Unfortunately, Carpenter shook his head. “Sorry, Babe,” he replied. “Just two.”
Babcock scowled, but she picked herself up and headed to the ropes. Sliding out onto the apron, the former lifeguard made a beeline toward the nearest corner and slapped the top turnbuckle. Instantly, the crowd began to clap in rhythm, while Babe herself scaled her way to the top of the watchtower. Inside the ring, the Babyfaced Killer fought her way up to wobbly legs, her back to the corner, Babe beckoning the brunette to turn around silently with a wave of her hand. Sure enough, Gabby answered the call, and Babcock launched herself to the skies, intending to tuck her knees and catch the Barely Legal brat with her diving Inverted Lungblower, the Chest Compressor...
... only before the blonde could react, GABBY took flight toward the descending Beach Babe. And SHE drew up HER knees, Mendoza’s hands reaching around to grab the back of Babe’s noggin and secure a tight grip as she fell back, Babcock suddenly and violently finding her Bubble UTTERLY Burst!
BURSTING YOUR BUBBLE:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=9mbVFgTFdFg
Both women landed on the canvas flat on their backs, chests heaving as they stared up at the lights. But Gabby found a way to roll over, letting an arm fall across Babe’s chest. It was enough of a cover for Al Carpenter to slide into position and slap off the...
ONE...
TWO...
THRENOOOOOOOO!
Babe raised a shoulder with a heartbeat to spare, then turned onto her side to make sure the brunette couldn’t try for a second cover. She needn’t have worried, Mendoza rolled in the other direction and struggled to all fours, long hair hanging lank and sweaty in her face. The Siren of Surf & Sand joined her adversary shortly thereafter and a mere look was enough to set the pair of fireplugs on another with a flurry of Bytch Slaps. These Slaps soon gave way to white-knuckled jabs, an escalation the FAWNatics greeted with raucous cheers, especially when they clambered to verticality. An alternating chorus of ‘BOO’s! and ‘YAY’s! indicated an even exchange of fisticuffs but it wasn’t long before the ‘YAY’s! had it, Babcock just teeing off on Gabby’s chin until the Baby-Faced Killer stumbled into the ropes.
Saved from a nasty tumble by nothing more than their stiff springiness, Mendoza bounced back the way she’d came and directly into the path of a big ol’ Haymak-- Gabby ducked beneath the strike and leapt onto the blonde’s back, her tanned, brawny arms looping around Babe’s neck like a noose. Legs threaded around Babcock’s waist, Mendoza crossed her ankles and SQUEEEEEEEEEEED for all she was worth.
“YEAH!” Rose bellowed from the Barely Legal side of town. “TAKE HER HEAD OFF, ROSE! CHOKE THE BYTCH OUT!”
Gabby didn’t bother to answer, the usually mouthy battler was all business, her right cheek pressed against the back of Babe’s noggin as she did indeed try to choke her into oblivion.
Over on the other side of the ring, Lily hopped onto the bottom rope and leaned into the ring circle as far as her frame would allow. “C’MON BABE!” she shouted. “GET OVER HERE AND I’LL FINISH HER OFF!”
Mendoza bore down all the harder and looked up, her dark eyes tossing sparks. “The hell you will, Bytch Fa--Aaaaahhhh shyt!”
Babe let out a gurgling roar and stamped toward sanctuary, covering half a dozen tottering steps in just as many seconds. “THAT’S IT!” Burlingame leaaaaaaaaaaned even farther, her fingers were perhaps ten inches from her partner’s. “JUST A LITTLE WHOOOAAANNNNNNNGGGGGHHH!”
So focused on Babe and Gabby was she that Lily failed to notice Rose’s absence on the far corner of the squared circle. The darkness of this ignorance was banished in an instant when the Smartest Girl in the Room snatched hold of the champ’s ankles and ripped her from the apron with a single savage yank! There was an ugly THWHUNK as Lily’s chin collided with the mat, followed by outraged jeers from the crowd when Evans caught her around the hips in a Waistlock. Paying absolutely no attention to the fans or the nerdly outrage of Al Carpenter, Rose hoisted the Star Strider up Wheelbarrow-style, swung her around in a half circle and BWUNG-THUNKED her down chest-first atop the steel guardrail. Burlingame ‘OOOOFFFFFHHHED!’ and would’ve slopped in half over the encroaching metal if Rose hadn’t slipped an arm through her legs and dumped her into the laps of half a dozen FAWNatics!
“Go ahead and pretend to help her up, losers.” Rose snapped. “But if ANY of you does anything to keep her out of action I will track you down and smash every one of your action fig--”
A roar from those assembled returned Evans’s attention to the ring just in time to watch Babcock BWUUUNG her partner back-first into the Beach Bomber’s corner. Though it didn’t break the Rear Naked Choke it did allow Babe to curl her right arm around the back of her attacker’s head. In the next instant she took several lumbering steps forward, hopped into the air and dropped to her tush to THWHUNK Gabby’s chin against the crown of her skull. Blown loose from her moorings by the Backpack Stunner, Mendoza landed stretched out in a sweaty starfish, which wouldn’t have been a problem if Babcock hadn’t hooked her legs behind the knees and leaned back for a weary…
BACKPACK STUNNER:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=o5EiejCM6Is
ONE…
TWO…
THRENOOOOOOOO!
Gabby pulled her leg loose and slid out from under her resilient adversary. Only vaguely aware of her partner’s current predicament, a red-faced Babe sucked in several deep, rasping breaths before forcing herself to a seat. “Sorry about that, Lil.” she croaked without really looking at her corner. “Ready to drive this rocket for a--” Babcock finally noted the champ’s absence and more importantly, the smirking presence of Rose Evans on the wrong side of the ring. Grimacing unpleasantly, the Beach Bunny got to her feet and stamped over to the empty stretch of canvas. “All right, wiseass.” she growled at Rose. “What’d you do with Lily?”
Evans jerked a thumb over her shoulder. “Tossed her in with the other trash. You’re more than welcome to join her if you’d like… you just have to go through AAARRGGGHHH LEGGO!”
More than a little tired of the other blonde’s smarmy shyt, Babcock reached over the top rope, snatched a double handful of Evans’s hair and PULLED as hard as she could!
Keening like a klaxon siren, Rose scrambled onto the apron and hurried to her feet. “Get her off!” she squealed to Al Carpenter. “Get this tramp OFF!”
Forced to act out of duty rather than any desire to reward Rose for her meddling, Al strode up behind the struggling blondes and laid a hand on Babcock’s shoulder. “C’mon Babe, let her go. Rose, stop screwing around and get back to your NNNGGGHHHH!”
Rose snatched a double handful of Babe’s hair, pulled her close and stepped off the apron. Now a Hot Shot was bad enough by itself, but a Hot Shot that snapped the victim back into an unsuspecting official was all the worse, as Babe and Al discovered when the former THWHUNKED the later with an impromptu Headbutt to the chin. Carpenter didn’t go out, he just rocked back on his heels, wheeled around and crumpled to one knee with both hands pressed to his face.
“That’s right.” Rose’s face lit up in a cold smile as she watched all the pieces come together. “Dance, puppets, dance!” Neither Babcock or Carpenter seemed much inclined to listen, so the Smartest Girl in the Room hopped back onto the apron and snagged the top rope in both hands. Then she leapt, landed up top and took flight again, leading with a pair of boots aimed straight at Babe’s che-- Babcock spun aside at the last second, leaving Rose to hit the next target in line, the freshly risen, totally unsuspecting Gabby Mendoza. Blown off her feet by the Missile Dropkick, Gabby went rolling across the canvas and stopped near the far side of the squared circle in a groaning heap.
Aware that she’d made a rare, but grievous error, Rose hurried to her feet and rounded on the rising ex-lifeguard. “You slippery little shyt, you’re gonna regOOOFFFFFFHHHH!”
Babcock hit her with a hard-charging Shoulderblock and kept right on moving, the ballistic little battler chugging away full speed ahead until she BWUUUNGED Evans into the turnbuckles. A pair of follow-up Shoulderblocks meant Rose was nice and winded when Babcock tipped her head back and CRAAACKED a Bytch Slap across her cheek. She caught Evans’s face in her hand and gave it a hard squeeze. “If you were half as smart as you claimed,” she jostled the brat’s head from side to side, “you never would’ve screwed with me.” There was no pithy comeback for that little bon mot, so Babe jerked Rose down into a Front Facelock, spun around and hopped into a seat on the top turnbuckle. A quick glance told her that Carpenter, Lily and Gabby seemed to be recovering, so the Siren of Surf & Sand braced her feet against the middle buckle and pushed off in a wide, swinging circle NOOOOOOOO!
Rose wrapped her arms around the other blonde’s thighs and kept right on spinning, all the better to set Babcock back at square one. Wrenching herself loose with a furious shriek, Evans clouted Babe across the jaw, then reared back and THWHUMPED a straight right hand into her crotch. “GET READY, GABZ!” the Bratty Brain barked over one shoulder. “THIS ONE’S ALL YOURS!”
REALLY BURSTING YOUR BUBBLE:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=LNAAVssDrVE
The Smartest Girl in the Room sent Babcock high into the air, and Gabby was ready to meet her, leaping and grabbing the back of the blonde’s noggin with both hands. But more importantly, the Babyfaced Killer drew her knees up to Babe’s chest as she fell back, and though Mendoza hit the mat first, it was instantly obvious that the worst of the impact went THROUGH Gabby and into Babe, who was sent flopping to the canvas and left convulsing. The lovely Latina quickly rolled over on her hip, draping herself across the lifeguard’s chest and hooking a leg...
ONE...
Out in the crowd, the reigning and defending Lightweight champion had finally managed to pull herself up to her knees. Leaning against the railing, her eyes caught sight of events in the ring, and she began to scramble up and over the steel...
TWO...
Landing on the other side of the railing, Burlingame stumbled to reach the ring. But while she might be one of the fastest and most graceful women in the industry, even her speed and agility has limits. The brunette only had enough time to reach the apron before Al Carpenter’s hand landed the final slap.
THREE!!!!!!!!!
“Ladies and gentlemen,” the announcer bellowed, “your winners, via pinfall... BAAARRREEELLLYYY LEEEGGGAAALLL!!!!!”
The toll of the bell seemed to momentarily sap the adrenaline from Burlingame’s body, Lily leaning against the edge of the ring, spent. Gabby, meanwhile, rose up to her knees and spat into her hand her used up wad of gum. Holding the confectionary between her thumb and index finger, the Babyfaced Killer held it off to the right of Lily’s bowed noggin, glancing briefly back and forth between the two. “Whattaya know?” the victorious brunette grinned. “They could be related!”
But then, Gabby looked down at the still insensate Babcock.
“You, on the other hand...” Mendoza’s free hand went to the left leghole of Babe’s suit. “I think you still need to learn a lesson in sticking your nose where it doesn’t belong.” With that, Gabby slipped her gum inside Babe’s swimsuit, pushing against the fabric to smush the sugary wad into her crotch. Behind her, Rose stood with slightly parted stems, waiting for Burlingame to look up...
... and when she did, the Smartest Girl in the Room ran her hands back and forth, across her tummy.
“My belt,” Rose mouthed. “Mine.”
