Post by alyadmirer on Jan 14, 2016 0:25:22 GMT
Once the crowd quieted down, the Ring Announcer cleared his throat and said, “Ladies and gentlemen, the following contest is a Tag Team match scheduled for one fall with a twenty minute time limit! Introducing first, weighing in at a combined two hundred and seventy one pounds. This is Lucy Harker and Mina Murray. Alone they are better than you could ever hope to be, together THEY… ARE… SCANDALOUS!”
Cage the Elephant twanged to life and the capacity crowd sprang to their feet to properly denigrate FAWN’s resident tabloid terrors. Smirking even before they stepped through the curtain, Harker and Murray each kissed their fingertips pageant style, then raised ’em to the rafters to better tease the Sheeple.
LUCY HARKER:
MINA MURRAY:
For their return battle against FAWN‘s biggest cheaters, Lucy and Mina wore heartstoppin’ fightin’ one-pieces adorned with high cut hips, a plunging neckline and a light dusting of silver glitter -- Lucy’s was a deep threatening blue with matching white pads and boots while Mina’s was gleaming white, her boots and pads coordinated to match Harker’s togs.
Delighted to tease the mouth-breathers and knuckle-draggers with a tantalizing glimpse of what they could never even touch, let alone possess, Scandalous started down the aisle in a hip-swiveling lockstep that managed to silence the ire of even their staunchest detractors, at least for the time it took them to pass by. When they reached the base of the aisle Harker hopped onto the apron, then turned around to face her partner without sparing anyone else so much as a glance.
Basking in the moment when all eyes turned in her direction, Mina exploded into a bounding run and dove between Lucy’s legs before popping to her feet in the center of the squared circle. Arms stretched over the top strand, Lucy dipped her hips and tumbled backward, rolling herself into the ring. She landed just in front of Mina and tilted her head back. For a moment they were the biggest babyfaces on the roster as those assembled urged them to ’JUST KISS, DAMMIT!’ but no, Scandalous drew out the tease for another night as they rolled their eyes and rewarded the trogolodytes with a pair of ‘you should be so lucky’ smirks. With no particular urge to head to a corner just yet, Lucy and Mina headed to their corner and turned their laser-like focus on the curtain and the pair of washed-up skags that waited on the other side.
The crowd began to buzz excitedly as Halestorm’s “I Like It Heavy” washed over them. FAWN’s first and arguably best tag team ever having shown that they had lost little to the nine year layoff, and the FAWNatics were more than ready to watch them get their revenge for Lucy and Mina’s postmatch shenanigans...
”I LIKE IT HEAVY”:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=9SPl-kGZ29I
“At a total combined weight of two hundred and fifty five pounds,” the announcer resumed, “they are the FIRST ever FAWN Tag Team champions. Ladies and gentlemen, I give you Sophie and Cynthia... THE MIIITTTCCCHHHEEELLL SIIISSSTTTEEERRRSSS!!!!!”
Nine years.
It had been NINE WHOLE YEARS since these two FAWN Originals, tied together by blood, had teamed up to go into battle. And frankly, until just a couple of months ago, most FAWNatics thought it would be another nine years at a minimum before Sophie and Cynthia had buried the hatchet that had seemingly severed the bonds between them.
But maybe Satan was skating to work this morning, because the Mitchell girls suddenly shot through the curtain, practically side by side, before Sophie headed toward the right side of the stage and Cynthia the left.
SOPHIE MITCHELL:
CYNTHIA MITCHELL:
Of course, some things REMAINED familiar. For tonight’s contest, it appeared that Mitchell was clad in her now standard ‘one-piece’--said outfit a deep purple number with a plunging V neckline that goes all the way to her navel and a back that might qualify as a thong if you were feeling generous. However, there was a tiny sense of mystery about the Cyn-Ful One’s sartorial choices, thanks to the T-shirt that extended down to just above where her thighs curved into her glutes. That shirt was white, with a light red circle in the middle faintly emblazoned with the Stars and Bars of her southern heritage. Inside the circle were two crossed roses, their buds also sporting the rebel emblem, albeit in a much more prominent manner.
And written above all this was the script: “SOUTHERN GIRL: WHO NEEDS BIG BOOBS WHEN YOU GOT A BUTT LIKE MINE?”
CYNTHIA’S T-SHIRT:
i676.photobucket.com/albums/vv123/FAWN_Fed/297460_256918641077409_1505090834_n.jpg
But on the other side, Sophie had trading in her customary garb for an ensemble quite similar to her younger sister’s, but with a few alterations. For one thing, while Sophie’s number kept the plunging neckline, the cut of her bottoms exposed significantly less cheek--though it did not COMPLETELY cover her glutes. And where Cynthia’s was a deep purple, Sophie’s remained her trademark green.
Meeting at the start of the aisle, Sophie and Cynthia started down to the ring, the Cynful One’s hips still retaining a sassy ‘avert your gaze, mortals!’ swish, though the crowd seemed less off-put by that sass than in days past. Together, the sisters made their way, Sophie slapping every hand along their route, Cynthia missing a few, but catching others...
When they reached ringside, Sophie ascended the ring steps, but Cynthia found herself frozen by a simple sign, reading “CYN IS IN!” It had been QUITE some time since the younger Mitchell could remember seeing a sign directed her way that WASN’T an insult or some such, and she responded to it by giving a small nod to the young man holding the placard. And when the Cynful One turned to the ring, she was greeted by another surprise:
Her sister seated on the middle rope, holding it open.
Cynthia hopped onto the apron, slipped a leg into the ring, and then pulled her torso through the strands in an agonizingly slow movement—well, agonizing for those straight males and not-so-straight females in the audience with a heart condition, at least. Only she paused her entrance to take a seat on the cable herself, keeping the ropes open for Sophie to draw her frame inside the ring.
Scandalous glared daggers at the reunited tandem but they made no effort to leave their corner. This non-verbal ceding of territory was all Cynthia needed, she veered sharp right to mount the ropes facing the hard camera while Sophie stormed to an empty corner and sprang onto the middle buckle to better salute the FAWNatics.
This proved a most costly error.
Lucy and Mina charged as soon as their opponent’s backs were turned, the former beelining for Cynthia while the latter hopped onto the apron and ran down Sophie. The crowd did what they could to warn them, but their alarm wasn’t even a heartbeat old when Harker slammed a Forearm Smash into the back of the Cynful One’s back. Totally unprepared, Cynthia folded over the rubber-coated steel, then let out a startled shriek when Lucy slipped an arm between her legs and dumped her to the floor Battle Royale style.
“HEY!” Sophie shouted as she watched her younger sister tumble out of sight. “YOU’RE GONNA PAY FOR THAT, BYTCHHHOOFFFHHH!”
Mina struck from the other side with a high Roundhouse that smashed across her blonde’s ribs. Sophie grunted and doubled over but didn’t lose her footing. That could’ve been considered a good thing until Harker piled on with another stiff Forearm Smash.
“HEY! KNOCK THAT CRAP OFF!” Craig Long bellowed even as the Scandalous brunette threaded her head through Mitchell’s legs. “THE MATCH HASN’T EVEN STARTED YET!”
“Exactly!” Lucy chirped as she backed away from the buckles with Sophie astride her shoulders in an Electric Chair. “The bell hasn’t sounded, so none of this is illegal.”
Caught between a rock and a hot place, the ref abruptly turned to the Timekeeper and flashed a signal. The bell CLANGED to set things underway, alas poor Sophie was already behind the eight ball. Turned in a half circle by the duplicitous mount beneath her, the vulnerable blonde didn’t realize the danger until Mina Murray leapt off the top and caught her in a Side Headlock as she flew by. Lucy dropped to her knees and leaned forward, thus dumping Sophie from her shoulders and THAWHUMPING her skull into the canvas courtesy a Scandalously augmented Bulldog.
The eldest Mitchell bounced through a gobsmacked somersault that brought her to rest with her boots draped sadly over the bottom rope. Though the match was on and pins perfectly acceptable, neither half of Scandalous had declared themselves the legal member, a fact Craig tried to bring to their attention as they scraped Sophie off the mat. “Don’t even think of going for a pin while you’re both still in the ring!” he barked. “I’m not gonna let you two WHOAH!” Long dove to one side just in time to avoid Sophie when Harker and Murray tossed her away in an involuntary Spear.
The same could not be said of Cynthia, who’d gamely worked her way back into the squared circle only to catch her sibling’s right shoulder square in the belly. “I just KNEW Tupperware would master stackable sluts one of these days, Mina dear!” Lucy chortled with the sisters crumpled at her feet. “It makes these little get togethers so much more convenient, if only they’d--”
“One of you get out of the ring, NOW.” the ref demanded as only an exasperated zebra could.
Lucy and Mina exchanged a glance. “Trust me, I’ll get out on the apron in just a moment.” Murray cooed. “But not until this coddled cunt does the same!”
Dismissing Craig with a sneer, Mina rounded on Sophie and set her on her feet with a handful of hair. Lucy hooked on from the other side and after doubling down on the blonde’s trunks they charged the ropes and hurled her out into the void. Sympathetic groans from the audience when Sophie THWHUMPED against the floor like the world’s leggiest sack of laundry.
True to her word, Murray sauntered over to her corner, hopped onto the strands and grabbed hold of the tag rope. She’d barely had time to cool her heels when Lucy closed in with Cynthia trailing along in a Side Headlock. “Sorry to keep you waiting, dear.” Harker apologized after swatting the blonde’s palm. “It’s just so hard to get this one moving when it’s bed time.”
“Is she being cranky again? I think we can deal with that.”
Indeed they could. Love ‘em or hate ‘em, Scandalous was a damned good tag team, especially when it came to the strategic application of double team maneuvers. Poor Cynthia discovered this for herself when Lucy snuggled in under her left arm and cinched on a tight Waistlock. Directly ahead, Mina planted on her left foot and lashed out with a gorgeous, acing Roundhouse that TWHACKED against the side of her target’s skull. Harker popped her hips the instant strike hit home, just dumping Mitchell on the back of her head in a Backdrop Suplex.
ROUNDHOUSE & BACKDROP SUPLEX @ 00:28
www.youtube.com/watch?v=ePmxkFaIvYw
No sass from the Tabloid Terrors now, Lucy rolled under the bottom rope to take up residence in the Scandalous corner while Mina honed in on the Cynful One. “You STOLE from us, chipmunk.” Murray hissed down at the prone brunette. “I can tolerate liars, cheaters and rumormongers without batting an eye, but thieves? Sweetie, I HATE thieves.”
Cynthia was too stunned to answer with words, but she did manage a short punch that ‘pakked!’ off the blonde’s trim tummy. Mina only scoffed, switched over to a Wristlock and slung her prey to the opposite side of the ring. Cynners the world over urged their heroine to hook onto the ropes or return with some scintillating offense of her own but in this they were doomed to disappointment. When Mitchell was only a few steps out the Scandalous blonde twisted around on her left heel and whipped her right leg up in a Crescent Kick. THWHACK! Cynthia’s head snapped back and the rest of her followed when calf struck chin with frightening force.
CRESCENT KICK:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=B5GOFtAXjSI
“What happened to you Cynthia? How’d you get down there?” Murray bellowed down at the sprawled, glassy-eyed battler. “What’s a bad ass bytch like you doin’ kissing the mat?”
She knew the answer of course, not that it kept Mina from talking that trash when she put a boot on Mitchell’s throat and dropped into a deep crouch. Cynthia flailed to life at once, the Terrible Tar Heel kicking and thrashing as she tried to regain control over her windpipe. Happy to bring some semblance of order to what’d so far been little more than a mugging, Craig Long hurried over and demanded, “Off her neck right now, Mina! ONE! TWO! THREE!”
Mina stepped off (literally) to go nose to nose with the startled official. “If you don’t knock off this biased officiating shyt right now I will report you to the front office the second I step through the curtain backstage. It wasn’t those two web-toed ass hats that beat us last time, it was you.”
Flustered, Craig couldn’t muster a response quick enough for Murray’s liking so she shooed him away, then dropped to her knees beside Cyn and wrapped both hands around her throat! There was nothing pretty about the next several seconds, just Mina choking the life from the former World Champion while Cynthia pawed and pulled at her opponent’s throttling hands. Breaking off her assault at ‘FOUR!’ this time, the heartless blonde didn’t bother to drag Mitchell to the corner, choosing instead to let her retch and gag while she made a crisp little tag over on the Scandalous side of town.
“Sure you’re ready to share, Meens?” Lucy asked. “I don’t want to slow down your fun.”
“Don’t worry, Luce. Nothing’s stopping my fun tonight.”
That brought the discussion to an end, at least for the moment. Murray hurried back to Cynthia and hair-hauled her to verticality while Lucy slunk into position on the other side. A double Irish Whip sent Mitchell into the strands on the Scandalous side of the ring and bounced her out quite a bit faster than she would’ve liked. Positioned a few steps ahead of her partner, Mina crouched, shot her hands between Cyn’s legs and pushed up on that much vaunted backside to send her skyward via a Leapfrog. Lucy greeted her with open arms which quickly snapped shut around the brunette’s hips, all the better for Harker to spin around and drop to her knees in ring-rattling Spinebuster!
LEAPFROG SPINEBUSTER @ 00:49
www.youtube.com/watch?v=ePmxkFaIvYw
Kneeling between her foe’s splayed gams, Lucy crooked one hand into a claw and admired her nails. “Do you think it’s too early to claw her filthy crotch?” she asked no one in particular.
The question might not have been directed her way, but Mina offered a response regardless. “I don’t think it’s EVER too early for her, Lucy darling. I mean, from what I gather, Cynthia’s the closest thing Mayberry has to a 7-Eleven.”
“Point taken, dear,” Harker replied with a grin, then PLUNGED her hand downward, sinking her talons into Mitchell’s defenseless nether regions. The Cynful One’s legs immediately began to kick wildly, but the kneeling, dark haired Scandalous beauty occupied a safe space between her stems. Cynthia’s upper body thrashed as well, her arms periodically spasming off the deck as Lucy’s nail inflicted excruciating agony. “Don’t worry, Cynthia,” she mused, “unlike Gomer and Goober, I won’t make you scream my name.”
The referee, duty bound to check for a submission, dropped to one knee and did just that. “What about it, Cynthia?” he asked. “I can stop this. Just say the word...”
If the word had been “f*ck you, assface,” the bell would be ringing and the match would be over. Instead, the Terrible Tar Heel continued to writhe in torment.
Harker’s digits continued to establish their dominance over Cynthia’s flower, but there was, of course, another woman who comprised the Scandalous union. And noticing that Craig Long’s attention was firmly on Lucy and Cynthia, Mina Murray dropped from the apron to the floor, stealthily making her way around the ring to the recovering elder Mitchell--indeed, the blonde’s approach was so sneaky that most of the crowd failed to notice until she was scraping Sophie up from her hands and knees. Keeping the leggy blonde stooped, Mina charged forward, slinging Mitchell into the ring steps with all her might.
Sophie struck the steel skull first, immediately crumpling into a pool of tangled arms and limbs.
The ‘CLAAANK’ of the collision instantly caused the official to rise from his knee, turning toward the sound. But it wasn’t quick enough. As soon as she had sent Sophie on her way, Murray had dropped to the floor, rolling under the ring, leaving only that pile of shattered blonde wreckage for the referee to see--and no indication of how she had ended up that way.
By the time Craig looked to the Scandalous corner, Mina had established her position there--admittedly sitting on the apron, her back to the ring post, one luscious leg extended to its full length before and the other raised, her knee providing a resting place for her elbow as she ran a hand through her locks.
“YAAAAAAGGGGGGHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!”
Long’s attention was brought back to the action inside the ring by a screech from the Cynful One, spurred by Lucy RIIIIIPPPPPIIINNNGG her Crotch Claw free. Rising to her feet, Harker brought Cynthia up to hers as well by a handful of hair, spinning the former World, Lightweight and Tag Team champion away from her. Stooping down, the Scandalous brunette stooped down, slipping her arm underneath Mitchell left arm while, at the same time, reaching a hand to grab her foe’s left shin. Hooking the leg, Harker popped her hips and powered the Terrible Tar Heel into the air...
... but in spite of the flames of pain radiating from her kitty, Cynthia still managed to push off with her remaining plant foot first, allowing her to flip OVER Lucy’s shoulder as Harker fell backward. While the Scandalous beauty plummeted to the canvas, Mitchell landed on her feet. That’s not to say that Lucy’s fall was debilitating--no, she proved pretty quick in beginning to scramble back to her feet. But Cynthia’s deft landing gave Mitchell the head start she needed to launch a Super Kick that struck Harker’s jaw with a thunderous ‘CRAAAACK!!!!’ before Lucy had made it up from one knee.
Lucy wheeled away from the blow, collapsing into a heap, facedown... but alas, Cynthia wasn’t far behind her, spilling out of her pivot to take a header toward the canvas. To her credit, though, instinct compelled the Cynful One to begin crawling toward her corner, in search of a tag. Unfortunately, Harker wasn’t far behind, pushing up to her hands and knees and starting to scamper toward the Scandalous corner. And, being much fresher than the Mitchell lass, the brunette reached her corner first, slapping Mina’s outstretched hand. But the sound of palm striking palm spurred the Cynful One into one last desperate dive, her hand swooping down to meet...
... air.
For Sophie Mitchell remained in a jumble of arms and legs beside the steps, only just now beginning to stir following her noggin’s violent encounter with the steel. Cynthia had just enough time to spot her seated sister on the floor before a hand plunged into her locks, yanking the Cynful One back to verticality.
“I don’t think Big Sister’s gonna be much help,” Murray whispered into Mitchell’s ear, then SLAMMED Cynthia’s face into the top turnbuckle. “I mean, we all know YOU’RE the one with the thickest skull in the family.”
Spinning the Cynful One’s back to the buckles, Mina SHOVED her foe back into the corner--HER corner--and laced Cynthia’s arms over the top rope. Murray then mounted the middle rope to Mitchell’s right, and began pounding boot after boot after boot to the side of Cynthia’s skull. The Scandalous blonde had reached eight kicks before she spied Sophie using the ringsteps to drag herself up, so she promptly jumped down from the ropes and slung the Cynful One out of the corner and to her rump with a Hairmare.
“This scene is SO last year,” Murray teased, starting to follow Cynthia out of the corner... but then, she abruptly spun around, just as Sophie was reaching her feet on the apron. In a flash, Mina’s hands had claimed two handfuls of hair, which she used to YANK the elder Mitchell down throat first across the top rope as she fell to her knees. Sophie whiplashed away, sent practically diving off the apron and crashing once more to the floor below.
“Now then,” Mina purred, pushing up from her knees and turning toward the Cynful One, “where were we?”
Genetically predisposed to run her mouth even in the midst of a thorough drubbing, Cynthia rolled to one knee and flipped swiped some hair off her forehead. “I was just about to kick your tawdry ass, you no good piece of peroxide-huffing shyt.”
Murray treated her to a smirk the brunette would’ve admired if she weren’t on the receiving end. “Oh, WERE you?” she cooed. “Because it looked to me like you were straining those fat little thighs to get out of the ring as fast as you could.”
The middle Mitchell pushed off her knee, a ramshackle, yet unbowed shadow of her usual self. “All I needed was a breather. And you ran your mouth long enough to give me one.” She raised her hands to chest level and beckoned the Scandalous battler forward. “So step up whenever you’re ready to get wreCKNNNNGGGHH!”
Mina darted in neat as you please, splitting Cyn’s defenses with a Bytch Slap that might’ve split her bottom lip if the former champ didn’t twist her head ever so slightly a split-second before impact. “I’ve been ready since the moment you and that gimp-for-hire sister of yours stole that match from us.” Murray snarled. “So rub the sting out of your chubby cheeks, check that pouty tramp’s lip for blood and then TAKE YOUR BEST F*CKING SH--”
Cynthia stormed into the breach with a huge right-handed Forearm Smash that would’ve loosened teeth if Murray hadn’t blocked it with her left forearm. Snatching Cyn’s hair with that same hand, Mina tugged her forward and rocked the North Carolinian’s noggin with a Forearm Smash of her own. Staggered, Mitchell stepped back and lowered her hands, making her a perfect target for the quick Side Kick Mina THWHAPPED into her belly. An identical Side Kick followed a heartbeat later, meaning Cynthia was practically defenseless when Murray finished her set with a Super Kick that THWHACKED off her opponent’s chin!
SCANDALOUS TRIO:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=tcpENAJ8Glk
Cynthia went down flat on her back but immediately sat up and made it to one knee before rising to full verticality facing the nearest neutral corner. “You’re like one of those inflatable clown punching bags that gets up whenever you knock it down.” Murray observed with a smile. “Challenge accepted.” She charged, leapt and drilled her boots into the brunette’s lower back to send Cynthia face-first into the top turnbuckle with an unpleasant BWUUUNG! Apparently Mitchell wasn’t *exactly* like one of those clown punching bags because there was no immediate recovery when she bounced out and landed flat on her back.
REAR DROPKICK TO TURNBUCKLE:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZZ6nFEAgVxI
“Ohhhhhh, take note of the shadow, Mina dear!” Harker called from the Scandalous corner. “Doesn’t it just scream ‘Splash Me Here!’?”
Mina got up, ‘flicked’ her briefs back into place and nodded appreciation for the dark band that almost perfectly bisected her opponent’s gulping tummy. “I don’t take much stock in fate, but some signs are too obvious to ignore.” the wicked blonde agreed. Bolstered by Lucy’s enthusiastic clapping, Murray skipped over her gasping prey and quickly climbed to the third floor. After raising her right hand for a wave turned one-finger salute, she flipped out into the void while performing a simultaneous barrel roll that THWHUMPED her back-first across the other woman’s defenseless midriff. Cynthia doubled up and listed to one side like she was trying to get off her back, alas it appeared to be too much effort because she slopped out flat after a second or two.
SKY TWISTER PRESS:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=afOuf7thfXc
Knowing full well that Mina had finished matches with her Sky Twister Press in the past, Craig Long strode over in case of a cover but found himself watching Murray ascending the corner for the second time in less than twenty seconds. From her perch, Mina glanced over one shoulder and smirked. “You can stare at my ass all you’d like,” she told the blushing zebra, “just try to keep professional about it, ok?” Craig didn’t get a chance to respond before the Scandalous battler leapt into the void and came crashing down with a follow-up Sky Twister Press!
A grimacing Cynthia managed to sit up, unfortunately Mina shoved her back down and started to cov-
“Trash on your six, dear.” Harker called sharply. Murray abandoned the pin at once, whirled around and sure enough there was Sophie Mitchell with her hands up and clasped for a Double Axehandle. Rather than back off and risk tripping over the other mongoloid, the blonde came in low and wrapped her arms around Sophie’s waist. Then she locked her hands and twisted her hips to toss the eldest Mitchell with a Belly to Belly Suplex that just so happened to THWHUMP her down on Cynthia’s already roiling tummy!
“HEY!” Craig barked. “GET OUTTA HERE SOPHIE, YOU KNOW BETTER THAN-- OH C’MON MINA, LET HER GO! LET HER GO, I SAID!” But Mina didn’t let go.
The failed assistance raised flashbacks of the blatant double teaming that ended Scandalous’s night in their first battle with the Opossum Sisters and so she snatched hold of Sophie’s left arm, stretched it out full length and threaded her legs around on each side. Ankles locked, she streeeeeeetched out full length and pulled for all she was worth in hopes of dislocating the meddlesome brat’s elbow courtesy of a Jujigatame.
BELLY TO BELLY SUPLEX TO JUJIGATAME:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=_p-O3shC_cc
The ref was momentarily at a loss. Sophie was clearly at fault and needed to exit the ring but she’d fallen into a blonde bear-trap named Mina Murray so what the heck did he do now? After several seconds of indecision (made all the longer by Sophie’s yowling and the roar of the crowd) Craig bent over and tapped Murray on the shoulder. “All right Mina, break the hold! Break the hold so I can get her out of the ring.”
Murray looked up at him, frowned, then craaaaaaaaanked back on the hold one more time before tossing Sophie’s wing away. “Go on then.” she snarled once she was back on her feet. “Get that piece of crap out of my ring. And make sure she stays out!” So Craig set about scraping Sophie off the mat, leaving Mina to do the same to her woozy sister. Granted one of those oh so rare perfectly legal golden opportunities, the blonde looked to the Scandalous corner and mouthed ‘Tag’ to Harker, who didn’t need to be told twice. She CLAPPED her hands to simulate the tag, then sprang from the apron to the high rent district in a single feline burst. Elsewhere, Mina wrapped her arms around Cyn’s midsection and hoisted her up onto the point of her left shoulder like she was going for a Canadian Backbreaker or perhaps a Crucifix Powerbomb. The awful truth of the matter was revealed when Lucy leapt from the top and dropped her left elbow across the Cynful One’s sternum at the precise moment Mina stepped aside. The combined might of Scandalous an gravity proved devastating for Cynthia as she was THAWHAMMED into the mat from almost six feet off the ground via a combination Diving Elbow Drop and Reverse DDT!
THE AWFUL TRUTH @ 3:39
www.youtube.com/watch?v=ePmxkFaIvYw
Lucy landed across the brunette’s chest in perfect position to hook the far leg but she surprised the FAWNatics by getting up and striding to the center of the ring. “YOU SEE THAT?” she shouted to the seething Mitchell supporters. “THEY’RE NOTHING WHEN THEY DON’T HAVE THE REFEREE IN THEIR POCKET!”
“OH GO F*CK YOURSELF!” Sophie roared, her pride getting the better of common sense as she tried to storm past the official. Craig looped an arm around her waist and pulled her back, rendering the big blonde powerless as Lucy kicked her sister onto her stomach and took up a position between her legs. Bending deep at the waist, Harker slipped her arms around Cynthia’s waist and hoisted her legs off the mat, wheelbarrow style. Then she dipped a little deeper and lifted Cynthia all the way up, her dazed noggin rising to a foot or so above Lucy’s head. She’d barely had time to enjoy the view when Mina rushed in, leapt and caught the Terrible Tar Heel’s head in a Three Quarters Facelock and laid out on her back to THWONK Cyn’s forehead into the canvas. Even worse, the impact bounced her up n’ back far enough for Lucy to bridge all the way over in a Wheelbarrow Suplex that TWHAMMED the brunette on the back of her head and shoulders!
CUTTER & WHEELBARROW SUPLEX COMBO @ 6:41
www.youtube.com/watch?v=ePmxkFaIvYw
T’was a murderous two’fer and it received an appropriate reaction from those assembled. Given Cynthia’s increasingly ragged appearance they fully expected Harker to maintain her bridge, yet the brunette tossed her prey’s legs aside and got right back up. Dark eyes locked on Sophie, she taunted, “Anything to say now, bytch?”
“You two skanks aren’t worth the wasted breath,” Sophie spat. “I’ll do all my talking with my hands, as soon as I get in there.”
“Yeeeeaaaaahhh,” Lucy cooed, “looks to be a tiny problem with that plan, doesn’t there?”
The brunette turned away from one Mitchell to look down at the other, Cynthia having at least managed to overcome the hellacious beating she had endured to summon the strength to push her way up to all fours... which lasted until Harker planted a boot between the Cynful One’s glutes, sending her crashing back into a facedown heap with a dismissive shove. But the middle Mitchell wasn’t discouraged, groaning as she again forced her way up to her hands and knees and began to crawl toward a corner...
... the Scandalous corner.
Not missing a beat, Mina sunk into a crouch on the apron, stretching her arm through the ropes and waving Mitchell toward her. With her other hand, the blonde brought her index finger up to her nose, and locking eyes with Sophie across the ring, she pushed upward, creating something of a pig’s snout as she shouting encouragement toward her “sister.” To her credit, the leggy blonde across the ring didn’t rise to the bait, merely fuming and trying to call Cynthia in the right direction.
But her sister didn’t hear her. Diving, Cynthia extended her hand... and Mina grabbed her wrist, dragging her deep into enemy territory and forcing the Cynful One’s throat down across the middle rope. Sophie might have been able to ignore the barbs aimed HER way, but the sight of her sister’s boots beating a frantic distress call against the canvas and the rasping sound of the middle Mitchell’s strangled cries cannot be ignored. Big sister exploded through the ropes...
... only to be cut off by Craig Long, sent into her path with a helpful shove from Lucy Harker. The referee desperately attempted to play the role of “voice of reason”, utterly oblivious to his efforts being undercut by the brunette’s head popping up over first his right shoulder and then his left, extending a tongue at Sophie and then blowing the enraged blonde a kiss.
Satisfied that Sophie wouldn’t be persuaded to leave anytime soon, Harker turned back toward her corner and clapped her hands loudly--again, loud enough to convince the official a tag had been made. Mina promptly gave the back of Cynthia’s head one last, forceful downward push, which spurred the middle rope to send the Cynful One whiplashing to her back. As Murray slipped into the ring, Lucy gathered up the middle Mitchell’s ankles, lifting the former World, Lightweight and Tag Team champion into an imposed handstand. And as Mina came closer, the brunette forced Cynthia’s ankles open a little more, leaving the Terrible Tar Heel Wide Open for Murray’s Axe Kick, which lands heavily between her thighs.
While a whimpering Cynthia toppled over to her side, Sophie finally managed to wrestle her way past Long. But Craig’s efforts to keep the leggy blonde restrained still managed to pay off for Scandalous, allowing Mina enough time to reset herself and catch the charging Sophie with a wicked Super Kick to the jaw. The eldest Mitchell wheeled away from the shot, her eyes crossing... but the worst was still to come.
Grabbing Sophie’s shoulders, Murray gave her fellow a blonde a violent tug, sending Mitchell toppling backward--and as she did, Mina hopped up, snaking her left leg across her opponent’s throat. And as the pair of gorgeous blondes hit the canvas, Murray locked her left boot in the pit of her right knee, while also trapping Sophie’s left arm above her head. She immediately grabbed her right boot and pulled upward, ratcheting up the pressure on her dreaded and deadly Rumor Killer!
RUMOR KILLER @0:40:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=Bpr9lPqcMDM
“Dammit, Mina,” Craig sighed, dropping to one knee and attempting to pry them apart, well aware of her little time Murray’s gams needed to kill a rumor. “Let me get her out of the ring!!!”
The blonde didn’t respond to him, instead directing her ire toward the now-gurgling Sophie. “Oh, I’m sorry,” Mina purred, “didn’t your hands have something they wanted to say?”
With her left arm locked in the depths of that damned Triangle, Sophie could only flail and pound with her right hand, neither of which did much good against the other blonde’s deadly stems. And her situation grew all the more dire when Murray halved the clasp she had on her prey’s right thigh to ‘smeck!’ a vile claw grip against Sophie’s defenseless trunks! Mitchell gurgle-screamed and her struggling grew quite a bit stronger but it started to fade in less than ten seconds and in another fifteen the big blonde was a slumbering shadow of her former self. Oblivious to the crime that’d just taken place behind his back, Craig Long sank into a crouch and swatted Mina’s knee. “Mina, let her go NOW. I don’t give a damn if she interfered, you clearly made her pay for it and I need to get her back to her corner.”
Murray fixed him with a cold, watchful look, then squeeeeeeeeeeeeeezed those fight winning legs one more time before unlocking the Triangle. Sophie rolled clear and ended up facedown, her normally fierce fightin’ frame reduced to so much ruined bikini meat.
While Craig did his best to get Sophie back to her corner, let’s travel back in time no more than thirty seconds to better witness the punishment that befell the legal member of the Mitchell Militia. See, while the zebra’s attention was honed in on Sophie and Mina, Lucy Harker snuck back into the squared circle and made a beeline for Cynthia. Hauling her up with a double handful of hair, the Scandalous brunette slapped on a Front Facelock and flipped the Cynful One’s near arm across her shoulders. Then she hooked Cynthia’s left leg behind the knee and pulled it off the mat in a snug Cradle. Eyes trained on the official, Harker waited until she was certain Long was fully committed to the second pair before she dipped her knees and muscled the woozy warrior directly overhead. Under different circumstances Lucy would’ve taken the time to show off, tonight however she displayed a deadly efficiency in turning Cynthia over and sitting out to THAWHONK the former World Champion down square on the back of her head and shoulders.
SCANDALMONGER:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=E4uEzUOasug
Lucy split the scene just as soon as she released her hooks, meaning the poor guileless official was none the wiser as he shuttled Sophie’s remains back to the Mitchell’s corner. Fast forward to the present, Mina got to her feet and made a small show of ‘snapping’ her trunks back into place. Then she strolled over to Cynthia and nudged her cheek with the toe of one boot. It got virtually no reaction, which was simultaneously pleasing and disappointing to the pretty sadist. “The other one’s asleep.” she told Lucy. “And this one’s practically out cold. Think we can send for the failure and the baby?”
Harker grimaced. “We’ve already paddled the baby, as for the OTHER other Mitchell, who cares?”
Murray nodded, the disappointment evident on her face. “Well then I guess it’s about time to mop up. Shall we?”
“But of course.”
The dark-haired half of Scandalous went to the top rope to wait in an expectant crouch while Mina scraped Cynthia off the canvas and trudged her toward that remarkably unfriendly corner of the ring. Turning her back to her partner, Murray booted Mitchell in the gut and forced her into a domineering Standing Headscissors. “Ready, Lucy dear?”
“At your signal, Mina.”
Mina angled one hand over her shoulder and Lucy smacked it at once, thus marking their first legal tag in perhaps ten minutes. Not that it mattered with both of their opponents reduced to smoldering ruin, but Harker and Murray weren’t going to let anyone accuse them of cheating, at least not when the referee was paying attention. Mina circled her arms around Cynthia’s waist immediately after the switch and muscled the trounced Tar Heel up onto her shoulders for a Powerbomb. “Aren’t you PRECIOUS!?” Lily chuckled to Mitchell’s pain-dulled features. “Don’t worry, this will all be over soon… buttercup.”
Cyn’s eyes flared for just a moment, unfortunately that was about the time Harker hopped from the corner to land with her left foot braced on Mitchell’s left thigh. THWHACK! Lucy drilled her right shin against the side of Cynthia’s face in a high rise Shining Wizard. Mitchell’s noggin snapped back hard, giving Mina all the excuse she needed to swing the brunette forward and down while also dropping to one knee. As if a Powerbomb wouldn’t have been bad enough, Cynthia landed spine-first along her opponent’s posted leg, a sadistic twist on the Backbreaker not seen since Katarina Kanaris left North America to helm FAWN’s European offices.
TOTES ADORBS @ 2:27
www.youtube.com/watch?v=r1DwtnKTSJI
Mina’s homage to the maneuver proved more than adequate, if Cynthia’s boneless flopping and the sympathetic groans of the FAWNatics meant anything at all. Left a sprawled, sweat-dappled wreck by the tandem maneuver, Cynthia didn’t so much as twitch when Lucy Harker crawled over and squatted atop her face. Mina added her own flare shortly thereafter, propping one elbow into the defenseless woman’s crotch while she stretched out on her side and toyed with her hair. In no mood to argue with the wicked pair, Craig Long swooped in beside them and made a desultory count.
ONE…
TWO…
THREE!
The bell sounded, the crowd jeered and the Announcer confirmed what was patently obvious. “Ladies and gentlemen, your winners via pin--”
“No, no, no, no, NO!” Lucy Harker was on her feet and storming to the ropes. “Give that here, moron!” No fool he, the Announcer walked over and offered the mic to Harker, who snatched it away without so much as a thank you. “Ladies, gentlemen and all the rest of you mouth-breathing ass hats,” she began, “your winners via a show of TOTAL F*CKING DOMINATION, are MINA MURRAY AND LUCY HARKER! WE ARE SCANDALOUS AND THESE BYTCHES ARE DONE!” She tossed the mic away and strutted back to Mina, who was standing over Cynthia with one boot pressed against her upturned cheek. “Well, now that we’ve stomped these cockroaches, who’s for Chinese?”
“That sounds lovely, Lucy dear.” Mina agreed. “Let me just…” she pushed up on one foot and twisted around in a vicious little circle to leave an ugly red welt on her opponent’s face. “Remember us fondly, bytch.” the blonde sneered.
Nothing but more stunned boos from the capacity crowd, they couldn’t remember a time when any top level Tag Team had been treated so shabbily, especially not first ballot Hall of Famers like Cynthia and Sophie. Pleased as could be by the hateful incredulity seeping down on them, Scandalous slipped through the ropes and strutted up the ramp arm in arm all while giggling over the Beating of the Year candidate they’d just handed out.
Cage the Elephant twanged to life and the capacity crowd sprang to their feet to properly denigrate FAWN’s resident tabloid terrors. Smirking even before they stepped through the curtain, Harker and Murray each kissed their fingertips pageant style, then raised ’em to the rafters to better tease the Sheeple.
LUCY HARKER:
MINA MURRAY:
For their return battle against FAWN‘s biggest cheaters, Lucy and Mina wore heartstoppin’ fightin’ one-pieces adorned with high cut hips, a plunging neckline and a light dusting of silver glitter -- Lucy’s was a deep threatening blue with matching white pads and boots while Mina’s was gleaming white, her boots and pads coordinated to match Harker’s togs.
Delighted to tease the mouth-breathers and knuckle-draggers with a tantalizing glimpse of what they could never even touch, let alone possess, Scandalous started down the aisle in a hip-swiveling lockstep that managed to silence the ire of even their staunchest detractors, at least for the time it took them to pass by. When they reached the base of the aisle Harker hopped onto the apron, then turned around to face her partner without sparing anyone else so much as a glance.
Basking in the moment when all eyes turned in her direction, Mina exploded into a bounding run and dove between Lucy’s legs before popping to her feet in the center of the squared circle. Arms stretched over the top strand, Lucy dipped her hips and tumbled backward, rolling herself into the ring. She landed just in front of Mina and tilted her head back. For a moment they were the biggest babyfaces on the roster as those assembled urged them to ’JUST KISS, DAMMIT!’ but no, Scandalous drew out the tease for another night as they rolled their eyes and rewarded the trogolodytes with a pair of ‘you should be so lucky’ smirks. With no particular urge to head to a corner just yet, Lucy and Mina headed to their corner and turned their laser-like focus on the curtain and the pair of washed-up skags that waited on the other side.
The crowd began to buzz excitedly as Halestorm’s “I Like It Heavy” washed over them. FAWN’s first and arguably best tag team ever having shown that they had lost little to the nine year layoff, and the FAWNatics were more than ready to watch them get their revenge for Lucy and Mina’s postmatch shenanigans...
”I LIKE IT HEAVY”:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=9SPl-kGZ29I
“At a total combined weight of two hundred and fifty five pounds,” the announcer resumed, “they are the FIRST ever FAWN Tag Team champions. Ladies and gentlemen, I give you Sophie and Cynthia... THE MIIITTTCCCHHHEEELLL SIIISSSTTTEEERRRSSS!!!!!”
Nine years.
It had been NINE WHOLE YEARS since these two FAWN Originals, tied together by blood, had teamed up to go into battle. And frankly, until just a couple of months ago, most FAWNatics thought it would be another nine years at a minimum before Sophie and Cynthia had buried the hatchet that had seemingly severed the bonds between them.
But maybe Satan was skating to work this morning, because the Mitchell girls suddenly shot through the curtain, practically side by side, before Sophie headed toward the right side of the stage and Cynthia the left.
SOPHIE MITCHELL:
CYNTHIA MITCHELL:
Of course, some things REMAINED familiar. For tonight’s contest, it appeared that Mitchell was clad in her now standard ‘one-piece’--said outfit a deep purple number with a plunging V neckline that goes all the way to her navel and a back that might qualify as a thong if you were feeling generous. However, there was a tiny sense of mystery about the Cyn-Ful One’s sartorial choices, thanks to the T-shirt that extended down to just above where her thighs curved into her glutes. That shirt was white, with a light red circle in the middle faintly emblazoned with the Stars and Bars of her southern heritage. Inside the circle were two crossed roses, their buds also sporting the rebel emblem, albeit in a much more prominent manner.
And written above all this was the script: “SOUTHERN GIRL: WHO NEEDS BIG BOOBS WHEN YOU GOT A BUTT LIKE MINE?”
CYNTHIA’S T-SHIRT:
i676.photobucket.com/albums/vv123/FAWN_Fed/297460_256918641077409_1505090834_n.jpg
But on the other side, Sophie had trading in her customary garb for an ensemble quite similar to her younger sister’s, but with a few alterations. For one thing, while Sophie’s number kept the plunging neckline, the cut of her bottoms exposed significantly less cheek--though it did not COMPLETELY cover her glutes. And where Cynthia’s was a deep purple, Sophie’s remained her trademark green.
Meeting at the start of the aisle, Sophie and Cynthia started down to the ring, the Cynful One’s hips still retaining a sassy ‘avert your gaze, mortals!’ swish, though the crowd seemed less off-put by that sass than in days past. Together, the sisters made their way, Sophie slapping every hand along their route, Cynthia missing a few, but catching others...
When they reached ringside, Sophie ascended the ring steps, but Cynthia found herself frozen by a simple sign, reading “CYN IS IN!” It had been QUITE some time since the younger Mitchell could remember seeing a sign directed her way that WASN’T an insult or some such, and she responded to it by giving a small nod to the young man holding the placard. And when the Cynful One turned to the ring, she was greeted by another surprise:
Her sister seated on the middle rope, holding it open.
Cynthia hopped onto the apron, slipped a leg into the ring, and then pulled her torso through the strands in an agonizingly slow movement—well, agonizing for those straight males and not-so-straight females in the audience with a heart condition, at least. Only she paused her entrance to take a seat on the cable herself, keeping the ropes open for Sophie to draw her frame inside the ring.
Scandalous glared daggers at the reunited tandem but they made no effort to leave their corner. This non-verbal ceding of territory was all Cynthia needed, she veered sharp right to mount the ropes facing the hard camera while Sophie stormed to an empty corner and sprang onto the middle buckle to better salute the FAWNatics.
This proved a most costly error.
Lucy and Mina charged as soon as their opponent’s backs were turned, the former beelining for Cynthia while the latter hopped onto the apron and ran down Sophie. The crowd did what they could to warn them, but their alarm wasn’t even a heartbeat old when Harker slammed a Forearm Smash into the back of the Cynful One’s back. Totally unprepared, Cynthia folded over the rubber-coated steel, then let out a startled shriek when Lucy slipped an arm between her legs and dumped her to the floor Battle Royale style.
“HEY!” Sophie shouted as she watched her younger sister tumble out of sight. “YOU’RE GONNA PAY FOR THAT, BYTCHHHOOFFFHHH!”
Mina struck from the other side with a high Roundhouse that smashed across her blonde’s ribs. Sophie grunted and doubled over but didn’t lose her footing. That could’ve been considered a good thing until Harker piled on with another stiff Forearm Smash.
“HEY! KNOCK THAT CRAP OFF!” Craig Long bellowed even as the Scandalous brunette threaded her head through Mitchell’s legs. “THE MATCH HASN’T EVEN STARTED YET!”
“Exactly!” Lucy chirped as she backed away from the buckles with Sophie astride her shoulders in an Electric Chair. “The bell hasn’t sounded, so none of this is illegal.”
Caught between a rock and a hot place, the ref abruptly turned to the Timekeeper and flashed a signal. The bell CLANGED to set things underway, alas poor Sophie was already behind the eight ball. Turned in a half circle by the duplicitous mount beneath her, the vulnerable blonde didn’t realize the danger until Mina Murray leapt off the top and caught her in a Side Headlock as she flew by. Lucy dropped to her knees and leaned forward, thus dumping Sophie from her shoulders and THAWHUMPING her skull into the canvas courtesy a Scandalously augmented Bulldog.
The eldest Mitchell bounced through a gobsmacked somersault that brought her to rest with her boots draped sadly over the bottom rope. Though the match was on and pins perfectly acceptable, neither half of Scandalous had declared themselves the legal member, a fact Craig tried to bring to their attention as they scraped Sophie off the mat. “Don’t even think of going for a pin while you’re both still in the ring!” he barked. “I’m not gonna let you two WHOAH!” Long dove to one side just in time to avoid Sophie when Harker and Murray tossed her away in an involuntary Spear.
The same could not be said of Cynthia, who’d gamely worked her way back into the squared circle only to catch her sibling’s right shoulder square in the belly. “I just KNEW Tupperware would master stackable sluts one of these days, Mina dear!” Lucy chortled with the sisters crumpled at her feet. “It makes these little get togethers so much more convenient, if only they’d--”
“One of you get out of the ring, NOW.” the ref demanded as only an exasperated zebra could.
Lucy and Mina exchanged a glance. “Trust me, I’ll get out on the apron in just a moment.” Murray cooed. “But not until this coddled cunt does the same!”
Dismissing Craig with a sneer, Mina rounded on Sophie and set her on her feet with a handful of hair. Lucy hooked on from the other side and after doubling down on the blonde’s trunks they charged the ropes and hurled her out into the void. Sympathetic groans from the audience when Sophie THWHUMPED against the floor like the world’s leggiest sack of laundry.
True to her word, Murray sauntered over to her corner, hopped onto the strands and grabbed hold of the tag rope. She’d barely had time to cool her heels when Lucy closed in with Cynthia trailing along in a Side Headlock. “Sorry to keep you waiting, dear.” Harker apologized after swatting the blonde’s palm. “It’s just so hard to get this one moving when it’s bed time.”
“Is she being cranky again? I think we can deal with that.”
Indeed they could. Love ‘em or hate ‘em, Scandalous was a damned good tag team, especially when it came to the strategic application of double team maneuvers. Poor Cynthia discovered this for herself when Lucy snuggled in under her left arm and cinched on a tight Waistlock. Directly ahead, Mina planted on her left foot and lashed out with a gorgeous, acing Roundhouse that TWHACKED against the side of her target’s skull. Harker popped her hips the instant strike hit home, just dumping Mitchell on the back of her head in a Backdrop Suplex.
ROUNDHOUSE & BACKDROP SUPLEX @ 00:28
www.youtube.com/watch?v=ePmxkFaIvYw
No sass from the Tabloid Terrors now, Lucy rolled under the bottom rope to take up residence in the Scandalous corner while Mina honed in on the Cynful One. “You STOLE from us, chipmunk.” Murray hissed down at the prone brunette. “I can tolerate liars, cheaters and rumormongers without batting an eye, but thieves? Sweetie, I HATE thieves.”
Cynthia was too stunned to answer with words, but she did manage a short punch that ‘pakked!’ off the blonde’s trim tummy. Mina only scoffed, switched over to a Wristlock and slung her prey to the opposite side of the ring. Cynners the world over urged their heroine to hook onto the ropes or return with some scintillating offense of her own but in this they were doomed to disappointment. When Mitchell was only a few steps out the Scandalous blonde twisted around on her left heel and whipped her right leg up in a Crescent Kick. THWHACK! Cynthia’s head snapped back and the rest of her followed when calf struck chin with frightening force.
CRESCENT KICK:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=B5GOFtAXjSI
“What happened to you Cynthia? How’d you get down there?” Murray bellowed down at the sprawled, glassy-eyed battler. “What’s a bad ass bytch like you doin’ kissing the mat?”
She knew the answer of course, not that it kept Mina from talking that trash when she put a boot on Mitchell’s throat and dropped into a deep crouch. Cynthia flailed to life at once, the Terrible Tar Heel kicking and thrashing as she tried to regain control over her windpipe. Happy to bring some semblance of order to what’d so far been little more than a mugging, Craig Long hurried over and demanded, “Off her neck right now, Mina! ONE! TWO! THREE!”
Mina stepped off (literally) to go nose to nose with the startled official. “If you don’t knock off this biased officiating shyt right now I will report you to the front office the second I step through the curtain backstage. It wasn’t those two web-toed ass hats that beat us last time, it was you.”
Flustered, Craig couldn’t muster a response quick enough for Murray’s liking so she shooed him away, then dropped to her knees beside Cyn and wrapped both hands around her throat! There was nothing pretty about the next several seconds, just Mina choking the life from the former World Champion while Cynthia pawed and pulled at her opponent’s throttling hands. Breaking off her assault at ‘FOUR!’ this time, the heartless blonde didn’t bother to drag Mitchell to the corner, choosing instead to let her retch and gag while she made a crisp little tag over on the Scandalous side of town.
“Sure you’re ready to share, Meens?” Lucy asked. “I don’t want to slow down your fun.”
“Don’t worry, Luce. Nothing’s stopping my fun tonight.”
That brought the discussion to an end, at least for the moment. Murray hurried back to Cynthia and hair-hauled her to verticality while Lucy slunk into position on the other side. A double Irish Whip sent Mitchell into the strands on the Scandalous side of the ring and bounced her out quite a bit faster than she would’ve liked. Positioned a few steps ahead of her partner, Mina crouched, shot her hands between Cyn’s legs and pushed up on that much vaunted backside to send her skyward via a Leapfrog. Lucy greeted her with open arms which quickly snapped shut around the brunette’s hips, all the better for Harker to spin around and drop to her knees in ring-rattling Spinebuster!
LEAPFROG SPINEBUSTER @ 00:49
www.youtube.com/watch?v=ePmxkFaIvYw
Kneeling between her foe’s splayed gams, Lucy crooked one hand into a claw and admired her nails. “Do you think it’s too early to claw her filthy crotch?” she asked no one in particular.
The question might not have been directed her way, but Mina offered a response regardless. “I don’t think it’s EVER too early for her, Lucy darling. I mean, from what I gather, Cynthia’s the closest thing Mayberry has to a 7-Eleven.”
“Point taken, dear,” Harker replied with a grin, then PLUNGED her hand downward, sinking her talons into Mitchell’s defenseless nether regions. The Cynful One’s legs immediately began to kick wildly, but the kneeling, dark haired Scandalous beauty occupied a safe space between her stems. Cynthia’s upper body thrashed as well, her arms periodically spasming off the deck as Lucy’s nail inflicted excruciating agony. “Don’t worry, Cynthia,” she mused, “unlike Gomer and Goober, I won’t make you scream my name.”
The referee, duty bound to check for a submission, dropped to one knee and did just that. “What about it, Cynthia?” he asked. “I can stop this. Just say the word...”
If the word had been “f*ck you, assface,” the bell would be ringing and the match would be over. Instead, the Terrible Tar Heel continued to writhe in torment.
Harker’s digits continued to establish their dominance over Cynthia’s flower, but there was, of course, another woman who comprised the Scandalous union. And noticing that Craig Long’s attention was firmly on Lucy and Cynthia, Mina Murray dropped from the apron to the floor, stealthily making her way around the ring to the recovering elder Mitchell--indeed, the blonde’s approach was so sneaky that most of the crowd failed to notice until she was scraping Sophie up from her hands and knees. Keeping the leggy blonde stooped, Mina charged forward, slinging Mitchell into the ring steps with all her might.
Sophie struck the steel skull first, immediately crumpling into a pool of tangled arms and limbs.
The ‘CLAAANK’ of the collision instantly caused the official to rise from his knee, turning toward the sound. But it wasn’t quick enough. As soon as she had sent Sophie on her way, Murray had dropped to the floor, rolling under the ring, leaving only that pile of shattered blonde wreckage for the referee to see--and no indication of how she had ended up that way.
By the time Craig looked to the Scandalous corner, Mina had established her position there--admittedly sitting on the apron, her back to the ring post, one luscious leg extended to its full length before and the other raised, her knee providing a resting place for her elbow as she ran a hand through her locks.
“YAAAAAAGGGGGGHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!”
Long’s attention was brought back to the action inside the ring by a screech from the Cynful One, spurred by Lucy RIIIIIPPPPPIIINNNGG her Crotch Claw free. Rising to her feet, Harker brought Cynthia up to hers as well by a handful of hair, spinning the former World, Lightweight and Tag Team champion away from her. Stooping down, the Scandalous brunette stooped down, slipping her arm underneath Mitchell left arm while, at the same time, reaching a hand to grab her foe’s left shin. Hooking the leg, Harker popped her hips and powered the Terrible Tar Heel into the air...
... but in spite of the flames of pain radiating from her kitty, Cynthia still managed to push off with her remaining plant foot first, allowing her to flip OVER Lucy’s shoulder as Harker fell backward. While the Scandalous beauty plummeted to the canvas, Mitchell landed on her feet. That’s not to say that Lucy’s fall was debilitating--no, she proved pretty quick in beginning to scramble back to her feet. But Cynthia’s deft landing gave Mitchell the head start she needed to launch a Super Kick that struck Harker’s jaw with a thunderous ‘CRAAAACK!!!!’ before Lucy had made it up from one knee.
Lucy wheeled away from the blow, collapsing into a heap, facedown... but alas, Cynthia wasn’t far behind her, spilling out of her pivot to take a header toward the canvas. To her credit, though, instinct compelled the Cynful One to begin crawling toward her corner, in search of a tag. Unfortunately, Harker wasn’t far behind, pushing up to her hands and knees and starting to scamper toward the Scandalous corner. And, being much fresher than the Mitchell lass, the brunette reached her corner first, slapping Mina’s outstretched hand. But the sound of palm striking palm spurred the Cynful One into one last desperate dive, her hand swooping down to meet...
... air.
For Sophie Mitchell remained in a jumble of arms and legs beside the steps, only just now beginning to stir following her noggin’s violent encounter with the steel. Cynthia had just enough time to spot her seated sister on the floor before a hand plunged into her locks, yanking the Cynful One back to verticality.
“I don’t think Big Sister’s gonna be much help,” Murray whispered into Mitchell’s ear, then SLAMMED Cynthia’s face into the top turnbuckle. “I mean, we all know YOU’RE the one with the thickest skull in the family.”
Spinning the Cynful One’s back to the buckles, Mina SHOVED her foe back into the corner--HER corner--and laced Cynthia’s arms over the top rope. Murray then mounted the middle rope to Mitchell’s right, and began pounding boot after boot after boot to the side of Cynthia’s skull. The Scandalous blonde had reached eight kicks before she spied Sophie using the ringsteps to drag herself up, so she promptly jumped down from the ropes and slung the Cynful One out of the corner and to her rump with a Hairmare.
“This scene is SO last year,” Murray teased, starting to follow Cynthia out of the corner... but then, she abruptly spun around, just as Sophie was reaching her feet on the apron. In a flash, Mina’s hands had claimed two handfuls of hair, which she used to YANK the elder Mitchell down throat first across the top rope as she fell to her knees. Sophie whiplashed away, sent practically diving off the apron and crashing once more to the floor below.
“Now then,” Mina purred, pushing up from her knees and turning toward the Cynful One, “where were we?”
Genetically predisposed to run her mouth even in the midst of a thorough drubbing, Cynthia rolled to one knee and flipped swiped some hair off her forehead. “I was just about to kick your tawdry ass, you no good piece of peroxide-huffing shyt.”
Murray treated her to a smirk the brunette would’ve admired if she weren’t on the receiving end. “Oh, WERE you?” she cooed. “Because it looked to me like you were straining those fat little thighs to get out of the ring as fast as you could.”
The middle Mitchell pushed off her knee, a ramshackle, yet unbowed shadow of her usual self. “All I needed was a breather. And you ran your mouth long enough to give me one.” She raised her hands to chest level and beckoned the Scandalous battler forward. “So step up whenever you’re ready to get wreCKNNNNGGGHH!”
Mina darted in neat as you please, splitting Cyn’s defenses with a Bytch Slap that might’ve split her bottom lip if the former champ didn’t twist her head ever so slightly a split-second before impact. “I’ve been ready since the moment you and that gimp-for-hire sister of yours stole that match from us.” Murray snarled. “So rub the sting out of your chubby cheeks, check that pouty tramp’s lip for blood and then TAKE YOUR BEST F*CKING SH--”
Cynthia stormed into the breach with a huge right-handed Forearm Smash that would’ve loosened teeth if Murray hadn’t blocked it with her left forearm. Snatching Cyn’s hair with that same hand, Mina tugged her forward and rocked the North Carolinian’s noggin with a Forearm Smash of her own. Staggered, Mitchell stepped back and lowered her hands, making her a perfect target for the quick Side Kick Mina THWHAPPED into her belly. An identical Side Kick followed a heartbeat later, meaning Cynthia was practically defenseless when Murray finished her set with a Super Kick that THWHACKED off her opponent’s chin!
SCANDALOUS TRIO:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=tcpENAJ8Glk
Cynthia went down flat on her back but immediately sat up and made it to one knee before rising to full verticality facing the nearest neutral corner. “You’re like one of those inflatable clown punching bags that gets up whenever you knock it down.” Murray observed with a smile. “Challenge accepted.” She charged, leapt and drilled her boots into the brunette’s lower back to send Cynthia face-first into the top turnbuckle with an unpleasant BWUUUNG! Apparently Mitchell wasn’t *exactly* like one of those clown punching bags because there was no immediate recovery when she bounced out and landed flat on her back.
REAR DROPKICK TO TURNBUCKLE:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZZ6nFEAgVxI
“Ohhhhhh, take note of the shadow, Mina dear!” Harker called from the Scandalous corner. “Doesn’t it just scream ‘Splash Me Here!’?”
Mina got up, ‘flicked’ her briefs back into place and nodded appreciation for the dark band that almost perfectly bisected her opponent’s gulping tummy. “I don’t take much stock in fate, but some signs are too obvious to ignore.” the wicked blonde agreed. Bolstered by Lucy’s enthusiastic clapping, Murray skipped over her gasping prey and quickly climbed to the third floor. After raising her right hand for a wave turned one-finger salute, she flipped out into the void while performing a simultaneous barrel roll that THWHUMPED her back-first across the other woman’s defenseless midriff. Cynthia doubled up and listed to one side like she was trying to get off her back, alas it appeared to be too much effort because she slopped out flat after a second or two.
SKY TWISTER PRESS:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=afOuf7thfXc
Knowing full well that Mina had finished matches with her Sky Twister Press in the past, Craig Long strode over in case of a cover but found himself watching Murray ascending the corner for the second time in less than twenty seconds. From her perch, Mina glanced over one shoulder and smirked. “You can stare at my ass all you’d like,” she told the blushing zebra, “just try to keep professional about it, ok?” Craig didn’t get a chance to respond before the Scandalous battler leapt into the void and came crashing down with a follow-up Sky Twister Press!
A grimacing Cynthia managed to sit up, unfortunately Mina shoved her back down and started to cov-
“Trash on your six, dear.” Harker called sharply. Murray abandoned the pin at once, whirled around and sure enough there was Sophie Mitchell with her hands up and clasped for a Double Axehandle. Rather than back off and risk tripping over the other mongoloid, the blonde came in low and wrapped her arms around Sophie’s waist. Then she locked her hands and twisted her hips to toss the eldest Mitchell with a Belly to Belly Suplex that just so happened to THWHUMP her down on Cynthia’s already roiling tummy!
“HEY!” Craig barked. “GET OUTTA HERE SOPHIE, YOU KNOW BETTER THAN-- OH C’MON MINA, LET HER GO! LET HER GO, I SAID!” But Mina didn’t let go.
The failed assistance raised flashbacks of the blatant double teaming that ended Scandalous’s night in their first battle with the Opossum Sisters and so she snatched hold of Sophie’s left arm, stretched it out full length and threaded her legs around on each side. Ankles locked, she streeeeeeetched out full length and pulled for all she was worth in hopes of dislocating the meddlesome brat’s elbow courtesy of a Jujigatame.
BELLY TO BELLY SUPLEX TO JUJIGATAME:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=_p-O3shC_cc
The ref was momentarily at a loss. Sophie was clearly at fault and needed to exit the ring but she’d fallen into a blonde bear-trap named Mina Murray so what the heck did he do now? After several seconds of indecision (made all the longer by Sophie’s yowling and the roar of the crowd) Craig bent over and tapped Murray on the shoulder. “All right Mina, break the hold! Break the hold so I can get her out of the ring.”
Murray looked up at him, frowned, then craaaaaaaaanked back on the hold one more time before tossing Sophie’s wing away. “Go on then.” she snarled once she was back on her feet. “Get that piece of crap out of my ring. And make sure she stays out!” So Craig set about scraping Sophie off the mat, leaving Mina to do the same to her woozy sister. Granted one of those oh so rare perfectly legal golden opportunities, the blonde looked to the Scandalous corner and mouthed ‘Tag’ to Harker, who didn’t need to be told twice. She CLAPPED her hands to simulate the tag, then sprang from the apron to the high rent district in a single feline burst. Elsewhere, Mina wrapped her arms around Cyn’s midsection and hoisted her up onto the point of her left shoulder like she was going for a Canadian Backbreaker or perhaps a Crucifix Powerbomb. The awful truth of the matter was revealed when Lucy leapt from the top and dropped her left elbow across the Cynful One’s sternum at the precise moment Mina stepped aside. The combined might of Scandalous an gravity proved devastating for Cynthia as she was THAWHAMMED into the mat from almost six feet off the ground via a combination Diving Elbow Drop and Reverse DDT!
THE AWFUL TRUTH @ 3:39
www.youtube.com/watch?v=ePmxkFaIvYw
Lucy landed across the brunette’s chest in perfect position to hook the far leg but she surprised the FAWNatics by getting up and striding to the center of the ring. “YOU SEE THAT?” she shouted to the seething Mitchell supporters. “THEY’RE NOTHING WHEN THEY DON’T HAVE THE REFEREE IN THEIR POCKET!”
“OH GO F*CK YOURSELF!” Sophie roared, her pride getting the better of common sense as she tried to storm past the official. Craig looped an arm around her waist and pulled her back, rendering the big blonde powerless as Lucy kicked her sister onto her stomach and took up a position between her legs. Bending deep at the waist, Harker slipped her arms around Cynthia’s waist and hoisted her legs off the mat, wheelbarrow style. Then she dipped a little deeper and lifted Cynthia all the way up, her dazed noggin rising to a foot or so above Lucy’s head. She’d barely had time to enjoy the view when Mina rushed in, leapt and caught the Terrible Tar Heel’s head in a Three Quarters Facelock and laid out on her back to THWONK Cyn’s forehead into the canvas. Even worse, the impact bounced her up n’ back far enough for Lucy to bridge all the way over in a Wheelbarrow Suplex that TWHAMMED the brunette on the back of her head and shoulders!
CUTTER & WHEELBARROW SUPLEX COMBO @ 6:41
www.youtube.com/watch?v=ePmxkFaIvYw
T’was a murderous two’fer and it received an appropriate reaction from those assembled. Given Cynthia’s increasingly ragged appearance they fully expected Harker to maintain her bridge, yet the brunette tossed her prey’s legs aside and got right back up. Dark eyes locked on Sophie, she taunted, “Anything to say now, bytch?”
“You two skanks aren’t worth the wasted breath,” Sophie spat. “I’ll do all my talking with my hands, as soon as I get in there.”
“Yeeeeaaaaahhh,” Lucy cooed, “looks to be a tiny problem with that plan, doesn’t there?”
The brunette turned away from one Mitchell to look down at the other, Cynthia having at least managed to overcome the hellacious beating she had endured to summon the strength to push her way up to all fours... which lasted until Harker planted a boot between the Cynful One’s glutes, sending her crashing back into a facedown heap with a dismissive shove. But the middle Mitchell wasn’t discouraged, groaning as she again forced her way up to her hands and knees and began to crawl toward a corner...
... the Scandalous corner.
Not missing a beat, Mina sunk into a crouch on the apron, stretching her arm through the ropes and waving Mitchell toward her. With her other hand, the blonde brought her index finger up to her nose, and locking eyes with Sophie across the ring, she pushed upward, creating something of a pig’s snout as she shouting encouragement toward her “sister.” To her credit, the leggy blonde across the ring didn’t rise to the bait, merely fuming and trying to call Cynthia in the right direction.
But her sister didn’t hear her. Diving, Cynthia extended her hand... and Mina grabbed her wrist, dragging her deep into enemy territory and forcing the Cynful One’s throat down across the middle rope. Sophie might have been able to ignore the barbs aimed HER way, but the sight of her sister’s boots beating a frantic distress call against the canvas and the rasping sound of the middle Mitchell’s strangled cries cannot be ignored. Big sister exploded through the ropes...
... only to be cut off by Craig Long, sent into her path with a helpful shove from Lucy Harker. The referee desperately attempted to play the role of “voice of reason”, utterly oblivious to his efforts being undercut by the brunette’s head popping up over first his right shoulder and then his left, extending a tongue at Sophie and then blowing the enraged blonde a kiss.
Satisfied that Sophie wouldn’t be persuaded to leave anytime soon, Harker turned back toward her corner and clapped her hands loudly--again, loud enough to convince the official a tag had been made. Mina promptly gave the back of Cynthia’s head one last, forceful downward push, which spurred the middle rope to send the Cynful One whiplashing to her back. As Murray slipped into the ring, Lucy gathered up the middle Mitchell’s ankles, lifting the former World, Lightweight and Tag Team champion into an imposed handstand. And as Mina came closer, the brunette forced Cynthia’s ankles open a little more, leaving the Terrible Tar Heel Wide Open for Murray’s Axe Kick, which lands heavily between her thighs.
While a whimpering Cynthia toppled over to her side, Sophie finally managed to wrestle her way past Long. But Craig’s efforts to keep the leggy blonde restrained still managed to pay off for Scandalous, allowing Mina enough time to reset herself and catch the charging Sophie with a wicked Super Kick to the jaw. The eldest Mitchell wheeled away from the shot, her eyes crossing... but the worst was still to come.
Grabbing Sophie’s shoulders, Murray gave her fellow a blonde a violent tug, sending Mitchell toppling backward--and as she did, Mina hopped up, snaking her left leg across her opponent’s throat. And as the pair of gorgeous blondes hit the canvas, Murray locked her left boot in the pit of her right knee, while also trapping Sophie’s left arm above her head. She immediately grabbed her right boot and pulled upward, ratcheting up the pressure on her dreaded and deadly Rumor Killer!
RUMOR KILLER @0:40:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=Bpr9lPqcMDM
“Dammit, Mina,” Craig sighed, dropping to one knee and attempting to pry them apart, well aware of her little time Murray’s gams needed to kill a rumor. “Let me get her out of the ring!!!”
The blonde didn’t respond to him, instead directing her ire toward the now-gurgling Sophie. “Oh, I’m sorry,” Mina purred, “didn’t your hands have something they wanted to say?”
With her left arm locked in the depths of that damned Triangle, Sophie could only flail and pound with her right hand, neither of which did much good against the other blonde’s deadly stems. And her situation grew all the more dire when Murray halved the clasp she had on her prey’s right thigh to ‘smeck!’ a vile claw grip against Sophie’s defenseless trunks! Mitchell gurgle-screamed and her struggling grew quite a bit stronger but it started to fade in less than ten seconds and in another fifteen the big blonde was a slumbering shadow of her former self. Oblivious to the crime that’d just taken place behind his back, Craig Long sank into a crouch and swatted Mina’s knee. “Mina, let her go NOW. I don’t give a damn if she interfered, you clearly made her pay for it and I need to get her back to her corner.”
Murray fixed him with a cold, watchful look, then squeeeeeeeeeeeeeezed those fight winning legs one more time before unlocking the Triangle. Sophie rolled clear and ended up facedown, her normally fierce fightin’ frame reduced to so much ruined bikini meat.
While Craig did his best to get Sophie back to her corner, let’s travel back in time no more than thirty seconds to better witness the punishment that befell the legal member of the Mitchell Militia. See, while the zebra’s attention was honed in on Sophie and Mina, Lucy Harker snuck back into the squared circle and made a beeline for Cynthia. Hauling her up with a double handful of hair, the Scandalous brunette slapped on a Front Facelock and flipped the Cynful One’s near arm across her shoulders. Then she hooked Cynthia’s left leg behind the knee and pulled it off the mat in a snug Cradle. Eyes trained on the official, Harker waited until she was certain Long was fully committed to the second pair before she dipped her knees and muscled the woozy warrior directly overhead. Under different circumstances Lucy would’ve taken the time to show off, tonight however she displayed a deadly efficiency in turning Cynthia over and sitting out to THAWHONK the former World Champion down square on the back of her head and shoulders.
SCANDALMONGER:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=E4uEzUOasug
Lucy split the scene just as soon as she released her hooks, meaning the poor guileless official was none the wiser as he shuttled Sophie’s remains back to the Mitchell’s corner. Fast forward to the present, Mina got to her feet and made a small show of ‘snapping’ her trunks back into place. Then she strolled over to Cynthia and nudged her cheek with the toe of one boot. It got virtually no reaction, which was simultaneously pleasing and disappointing to the pretty sadist. “The other one’s asleep.” she told Lucy. “And this one’s practically out cold. Think we can send for the failure and the baby?”
Harker grimaced. “We’ve already paddled the baby, as for the OTHER other Mitchell, who cares?”
Murray nodded, the disappointment evident on her face. “Well then I guess it’s about time to mop up. Shall we?”
“But of course.”
The dark-haired half of Scandalous went to the top rope to wait in an expectant crouch while Mina scraped Cynthia off the canvas and trudged her toward that remarkably unfriendly corner of the ring. Turning her back to her partner, Murray booted Mitchell in the gut and forced her into a domineering Standing Headscissors. “Ready, Lucy dear?”
“At your signal, Mina.”
Mina angled one hand over her shoulder and Lucy smacked it at once, thus marking their first legal tag in perhaps ten minutes. Not that it mattered with both of their opponents reduced to smoldering ruin, but Harker and Murray weren’t going to let anyone accuse them of cheating, at least not when the referee was paying attention. Mina circled her arms around Cynthia’s waist immediately after the switch and muscled the trounced Tar Heel up onto her shoulders for a Powerbomb. “Aren’t you PRECIOUS!?” Lily chuckled to Mitchell’s pain-dulled features. “Don’t worry, this will all be over soon… buttercup.”
Cyn’s eyes flared for just a moment, unfortunately that was about the time Harker hopped from the corner to land with her left foot braced on Mitchell’s left thigh. THWHACK! Lucy drilled her right shin against the side of Cynthia’s face in a high rise Shining Wizard. Mitchell’s noggin snapped back hard, giving Mina all the excuse she needed to swing the brunette forward and down while also dropping to one knee. As if a Powerbomb wouldn’t have been bad enough, Cynthia landed spine-first along her opponent’s posted leg, a sadistic twist on the Backbreaker not seen since Katarina Kanaris left North America to helm FAWN’s European offices.
TOTES ADORBS @ 2:27
www.youtube.com/watch?v=r1DwtnKTSJI
Mina’s homage to the maneuver proved more than adequate, if Cynthia’s boneless flopping and the sympathetic groans of the FAWNatics meant anything at all. Left a sprawled, sweat-dappled wreck by the tandem maneuver, Cynthia didn’t so much as twitch when Lucy Harker crawled over and squatted atop her face. Mina added her own flare shortly thereafter, propping one elbow into the defenseless woman’s crotch while she stretched out on her side and toyed with her hair. In no mood to argue with the wicked pair, Craig Long swooped in beside them and made a desultory count.
ONE…
TWO…
THREE!
The bell sounded, the crowd jeered and the Announcer confirmed what was patently obvious. “Ladies and gentlemen, your winners via pin--”
“No, no, no, no, NO!” Lucy Harker was on her feet and storming to the ropes. “Give that here, moron!” No fool he, the Announcer walked over and offered the mic to Harker, who snatched it away without so much as a thank you. “Ladies, gentlemen and all the rest of you mouth-breathing ass hats,” she began, “your winners via a show of TOTAL F*CKING DOMINATION, are MINA MURRAY AND LUCY HARKER! WE ARE SCANDALOUS AND THESE BYTCHES ARE DONE!” She tossed the mic away and strutted back to Mina, who was standing over Cynthia with one boot pressed against her upturned cheek. “Well, now that we’ve stomped these cockroaches, who’s for Chinese?”
“That sounds lovely, Lucy dear.” Mina agreed. “Let me just…” she pushed up on one foot and twisted around in a vicious little circle to leave an ugly red welt on her opponent’s face. “Remember us fondly, bytch.” the blonde sneered.
Nothing but more stunned boos from the capacity crowd, they couldn’t remember a time when any top level Tag Team had been treated so shabbily, especially not first ballot Hall of Famers like Cynthia and Sophie. Pleased as could be by the hateful incredulity seeping down on them, Scandalous slipped through the ropes and strutted up the ramp arm in arm all while giggling over the Beating of the Year candidate they’d just handed out.