Post by hawkeye on Jun 7, 2023 3:16:50 GMT
As the sound of “Sex on Wheels” by My Life With the Thrill Kill Kult washes over the crowd, the assembled test their lungs, jeering the vile reincarnation of one of a once-up-on-a-time foremost FAWN tag team.
( www.youtube.com/watch?v=PfsbLhptmS4 )
With the sellout throng doing its best to drown out the music, the aptly named Seah Sin strides to center stage with her compatriot Reiko Ohno alongside. Of course, there is no Yuko Ogura accompanying, FAWN’s most famous manager sent packing years ago. However, the Mach Two version of the Asian Invasion still packs a lethal punch on occasion.
SEAH SIN
REIKO OHNO
Reiko demands the assembled show their reverence but when it’s not forthcoming, the duo head down the ramp and aisle without satisfaction.
The Korean and Japanese grapplers are garbed respectively in matching shiny, red one-piece outfits. Their gear plunges from cleavage to navel, the triangular opening strategically covered in black mesh. Red pads and ankle boots finish the attire. Dark hair flows down Ohno’s back while a cinnamon-brown mane courses over Sin’s shoulders.
The Invaders stalk toward the ring, staying out of range of the fan’s dirty paws if not their crass voices. Seah and Reiko cast surly glances in their direction, occasionally demanding the Orlando rabble shut their mouths, telling the imbeciles to watch and learn as they destroy two of FAWN’s favorites.
As they reach the ring, Reiko grabs a microphone from an attendant and draws it to her lips.
“You’re going to remember this night for a long time,” Ohno shouts as she ascends the ring steps. “This will be the first step in our final success to commander this company.”
Reiko takes a seat on the middle strand before pushing up the top, leaving her partner plenty of room to enter. Sin slips through and the Yokohama Mama enters behind, the Invaders moving to the middle and pointing their snarling features to the hard cam.
“The Girl Scout and the Fat Ass will not know what to do when we beat them down,” Ohno informs. “But they will when we capture and torture them. The only thing they can do. TAP OUT!”
The bellowing crowd is enraged and lets the Invaders know.
“Sanders. You survived the Little Dragon only with the help of your underling with the big backside. Tonight. There will be no one to save either of you from the Invasion. The Ninja and the Dragon will make both of you the ultimate victims of AI.”
The crowd continues to voice its boisterous displeasure as Reiko drops the mic. The treacherous team from the far side of the Pacific Rim moves to their corner, the Invaders’ attention shifting to the upper stage.
Minutes before in the Gorilla Position, Kylie Sanders glances at the curtain, bouncing on the balls of her feet and performing some light shadow boxing to warm up. She lets out a nervous breath, “Whew… here we go.” The butterflies that flare up in her stomach before every match brought friends tonight. Asian Invasion is an experienced, decorated tag team with a lot of skill to go with practiced cruelty. And she’s going to face them with someone she’s never tagged with before. Cassava Onika, a skilled young woman who’s consistently claimed to be her biggest fan even after Kylie used and ditched her. But if the red flags signal true, the Sri Lankan shortstack has some extreme stalker tendencies.
She looks over to Cassava seeing the Buns of Mass Destruction champion warming up as well, stretching and jogging in place to work all the kinks out before she participates in the most important match of her life so far. Teaming with her heroine, guiding light, and if The Superfan has her way future wife, Kylie Sanders!
Cassava lowers into a series of Cossack Squats to activate her legs and open up her hips for all the attacks she’ll be throwing out later. She looks up at her temporary(for now) partner with a cheerful, determined expression, “I’m not gonna let you down tonight, Miss Sanders. I’ll set ‘em up, knock ‘em down and leave them ready for you to pin!”
For a second Kylie stares down silently at Cassava, distracted by the devoted Corps Captain’s swaying cleavage before she catches herself and answers back, pondering that Cassava should send her puberty a Thank You card. “Save some of them for me, I need payback from the times those two twits jumped me. I’ve seen what you can do, so I know that if we stay focused, together we can send these two packing.”
Cassava shoots up like she’s been shot out of cannon and a startled Kylie steps back, nearly chin checked by The Superfan’s jiggling frontage. “Hell yeah, we will! We’re gonna give them a heaping serving of Cake before sending them on a drive to Pleasant Valley!”
Kylie smiles and nods in agreement but tinged with worry, she appreciates the enthusiasm but it’s still a bit much. She spots an oncoming attendant who gives her a silent signal, “Looks like it’s game time, let’s do this!”
Onika pumps her fist in the air “Woo!”
The glorious, melodious and upbeat Sixpence None The Richer’s ‘There She Goes’ sweeps through the arena, Kylie’s Corps roaring to their collective feet. Kylie offered to come out to Onika’s theme song in a show of solidarity, but the Milk Chocolate Mauler insisted on the veteran’s song as it fulfilled one of her MANY Sanders-related dreams.
www.youtube.com/watch?v=tMfXeuv4kZE
Ky and Cassava push through the curtains and moves to center stage, reveling in and playing to the crowd. Their volume proves Kylie might have more collective love being sent in her direction than even her celebrated Girl Scout days, and Cassava’s fanbase may not be far behind. The silvery-bobbed, elfin beauty and the dyed-blonde curvaceous cutie pump their fists and the Corps responds.
KYLIE SANDERS
Drawing on the echoes of her original gear, but slightly altered to go more in with the black instead of the gold, Sanders dons a black sports bra topside with black boy-cut shorts. Both the top and bottom are trimmed in yellow-gold. Black boots and pads finish the ensemble.
www.yandy.com/products/lets-mesh-around-bra-set
On her way to the ring Cassava pauses for a quick twerk with a fan cosplaying as Shea London causing Sanders to scrunch her face and stifle a giggle as booty battler calls out, “This is just like my dream last night!” The host of FAWN Finds is dressed for battle in a white tank top that shows a hint of her belly button, a red bra is visible through the thin fabric that's barely keeping her F Cup breasts from flashing the fans as she bounces to and fro. On her wide hips is a pair of pink booty shorts that seemed painted on and a size too small for the ass that breaks hearts and faces. She chooses to wrestle in bare feet like her hero Kylie Sanders once did, that worship clearly bleeding into her wardrobe and choice of hair dye (blonde with pink highlights).
CASSAVA ONIKA
A beaming Sanders and Onika walk the aisle, happy to slap hands with their fans, enjoying the chants of ‘KY-LEE’ and ‘CAS-SA-VA’. A few pockets of unforgiving fans attempt to continue with the ‘TROLL…TROLL…TROLL” chant of Kylie’s less popular times. She takes it in stride and goes on her way, but Cassava stops to kick the guardrail angrily and points at the chastised group with a threatening expression, “Don’t disrespect a legend!”
The two lightweights make their way down the ramp and when reaching the ring, Cassava bounds up the steel steps and sits on the middle strand, pushing up the top making a gap for Sanders to step through. As she does, the former Vanilla Chill pats Cassava on the back, the slight touch from her obsession makes The Superfan break out in gooseflesh.
Asian Invasion stalk out of their corner eager to get this execution over with and Kylie quickly goes to butt heads with the bullying Invaders, Cassava’s a half-step behind ready to lay down her life as a bodyguard. The speedy Official quickly steps between them insisting on separation, “Not before the bell! Not before the bell!”
Before the Iowan duo head to their corner, Cassava reaches into her cleavage with two fingers, she pulls out some note cards and hands them to the announcer. Giving them a quick once-over, he raises an eyebrow but doesn’t protest, raising the microphone to his lips he heralds,
“From Pleasant Valley, Iowa… She stands five feet, two inches tall, and weighs in tonight at one hundred twenty-five pounds… She is the woman of 1,000 Hip attacks and the first, current, and only Buns of Mass Destruction Champion...this is Cassava Onika!!”
“Her partner tonight; a Television champion. Lightweight champion. Two-time Tag team champion uncrowned in her first run due to interference by management. Intercontinental champion. Wwooorrrld Chaampioonnn!!!” The announcer really puts some jazz on the high point of Kylie’s or what would be any wrestler’s career. The woman herself is smiling both pleased and a little embarrassed, she lowers and shakes her head. "I remember this from last time."
The announcer continues, “She holds the FAWN record for most matches and wins. The top merchandise mover for multiple years. A FAWN Wrestler of the Year. Has been on the cover of Gladiatrix over 20 times. Has a Bachelor’s Degree from the University of Iowa. Has beaten Emily West more times than anyone else in history. She brushes three times a day...”
As the announcer keeps going… and going, Seah Sin angrily paces back and forth, growing more impatient with every syllable droning from the idiot’s mouth. Reiko Ohno has to be restrained by the official to keep from ripping the mic from his hand, “This is propaganda! A show of bias! A stalling tactic to save a has-been and her pear-shaped toadie!”
“She has a holiday named after her in Pleasant Valley. A future Hall of Famer. She upset the gameboard of The Black Court. The founder of Hot & Bothered. Her best friend is from Nnnnnice, France! A goddess of the harvest. The cream in your coffee. The Ace in the deck. The perfect medium between cute and sexy. A cold scoop of Vanilla on a hot day. The Platinum Pixie, Kyliiiie Saanderrrrrs!!
As Kylie’s name is spoken, Cassava spins her right fist at the elbow, and as he finishes Cassava jumps forward with the momentum of her arm, throwing up a triumphant fist into the air to cap off the retelling of Sanders’ storied career. This blatant display of fangirlism gets them a burst of applause and laughter from the audience, and twin death stares from the Asian Invasion.
For Kylie, she can’t help but appreciate Onika’s effort, grinning widely. As the Iowans move to their corner, Sanders offers a soft “Bring it in” to her biggest fan.
Cassava doesn’t hesitate, giving the blonde a tight hug that draws a gasp from the Pixie.
“A little less. A little less,” Ky huffs breathlessly.
The BMD champ releases, her body vibrating with excitement from the embrace.
“Do you want to go first?” Kylie asks.
“I…I…want what you want,” Onika stammers.
What neither of them want are the Invaders rushing across the canvas before the bell, Seah laying into Sanders with a double axhandle to the back of the Hawkeye’s skull and Reiko sending a forearm shiver to the jaw of a turning Cassava.
“The war to end all wars doesn’t begin on your time,” Sin informs, pounding Ky into the corner, Sanders doing her best to cover up but she’s dazed from the sneak attack.
FAWN’s lead ref Nick Castle tries to gain control. Ohno does it for him to a degree, blasting Cassava with another forearm shiver then grabbing her foe by a wrist and shoulder and heaving the pneumatic Milk Chocolate Mauler up and over the top rope, Cassava first crashing to the apron then tumbling to the floor.
When it appears Reiko will follow Cassava out of her own accord, slipping a leg between the cables, Castle calls for the bell, happy to have two women in the ring, even if the start is a dubious one. But as soon as the claxon call echoes through the arena, Reiko pulls her leg back in.
With Ky cornered, the Invaders move to either side and take turns delivering side kick after side kick to the Pixie’s chest, Seah from Ky’s left and Reiko from the right. After a half-dozen detonating boots, each grabs a wrist and bullies her halfway down the length of the ring.
Together, the Korean and Japanese grapplers point their foe to the opposite strands and send Ky racing with a double Irish Whip. The Ninja and the Little Dragon surge to center stage, waiting for the return of Sanders. Dipping, they each lift and heave an alabaster lower limb of the reborn Girl Scout…and Kylie SOARS into a front flip over the top, CRASHING to her spine several feet beyond the Invaders from the dual back body drop.
Kylie arches in anguish, hand pressed to the base of her backbone.
Thankfully for Ky, Castle intercedes, locking elbows with Reiko and steering the Yokohama native toward home base.
Sin’s more than happy to continue the beatdown on her own, lifting Kylie from a seated position and leaning the Platinum Pixie deep into her corner. She pivots away from Ky and lights her adversary up with a meaty THWACK, Seah’s knife-edge chop sending a reflexive ‘WOOO’ through the audience.
The Little Dragon sends fire into Sanders’ chest once more, CRACKING in a second backhand blow, a welt quickly emerging just above Ky’s modest cleavage. Sin has a third prepared when she notices Cassava climbing to her designated spot on the apron and, breaking from her attack on the FAWN legend, she lays an overhand slap to Onika’s massive bounty.
Wincing in pain, her lids momentarily clenching from the sting, Cassava opens them and has fire in her eyes, not so much from the attack on her but the underhanded assault on the would-be paramour of her dreams.
Cassava bolts partially through the ropes when Seah shoves Nick into the furious Mauler.
“Keep that cheater out of the ring,” Seah shouts.
Castle does his best, trying to calm Cassava less than successfully. But he does push her back out of the ring, Onika going ballistic in Nick’s arms as she watches over the man’s shoulders as the Dragon sends a raised knee between Kylie’s ivory stems.
Sanders rises to tiptoes, hazel eyes watering, jaw dropping as her hands move between her thighs, a barely audible chirp of agony escaping her Cupid’s Arrow lips.
The Korean gleefully waves at the BMD champ from Castle’s blind spot, playing with her emotions.
Cassava fights the overwhelming urge to scrap her way to Seah through the official. She bites her lower lip and reaches to tag Ky’s shoulder instead, but Sin pulls a waddling Sanders out of range before Cassava can tag her way in.
Moving a knock-kneed Pixie to the middle of the ring, Seah unleashes a pair of judo chops to each nape of Kylie’s neck, sending the faltering veteran to her haunches in front of the rampaging Invader. Sin turns to taunt Sanders’ partner.
“Just think, tagging with this trash is your dream,” Seah chuckles. “And you’re never going to see the inside of the ring as her legal partner.”
Onika calls out to a depleted Sanders and Kylie turns her head in Cassava’s direction, hands still buried in her crotch.
“Ah ah,” Sin tsks, before thrashing a back heel kick into Kylie’s right temple that sends Sanders collapsing to her back in a spreadeagle. Seah genuflects a knee onto the cleft of Kylie’s bruised bosom, raising her hands triumphantly for the…
ONE…
TWO…
Kylie shoves the leg off, keeping the newly minted team alive and Cassava’s fantasy a reality for at least a few more seconds.
Sanders rolls to her chest and slithers toward her big-booty salvation, but Sin isn’t having it.
The Korean moves to a standing forward-facing straddle of the Pixie then drops to a crouch, driving her petite rear end into the base of Ky’s spine. Reaching forward, Seah laces her fingers and slips them under the Hawkeye’s chin. With Kylie’s head cupped from below, Sin yanks back on her chinlock, arching the Iowan.
A wincing Sanders stares at the outstretched hand of her superfan but is unable to get closer, Kylie just trying to survive the growing knots in her back.
“Ask her,” Seah demands.
Castle reacts as required.
Sin forces Kylie to nod, but FAWN’s lead ref is too experienced for such a ploy, Nick correctly interpreting a grunt in the negatory form the Iowan as the official response.
A frustrated Little Dragon releases her grip and grabs Ky’s platinum bob, forcing the beleaguered Sanders up with her. Shifting her grip, Sin tosses Ky away with an Irish Whip and quickly races behind. Rebounding out of the cables, Kylie stretches her right arm wide, but Seah has the same idea and the two connect with simultaneous clotheslines that rip each combatant off the deck in violent fashion.
The grapplers end in single files, arms over their heads, boots pointed in opposite directions, staring blankly at the rafters.
Castle starts a dual ten-count on the flattened fighters, the crowd and Cassava reacting with synchronized rhythmic claps, trying their best to will Kylie to her partner before Seah can make a tag to her friendly neighborhood ninja.
“You got this, Miss Sanders!” Cassava yells out while keeping on beat.
“I’m right here, you can do it! They’re nothing next to you!”
The Corps Commander’s echoing supportive tones rouse Kylie at the count of “FIVE!” and stirs Kylie to roll to all fours. Unfortunately, it has the opposite reaction with Seah to a similar result; to the Korean Invader, the shrill ass-kissing of The Fat Ass is so irritating Seah awakes with a growl.
“Grrrr…. will her blabbing never cease?”
Sanders was on the move first but is much farther from her corner and moving slowly from the beginning onslaught. Sin covers her shorter distance swiftly by throwing herself into a somersault and leaping out to Clap! hands with Reiko and brings the Yokohama Mama into the match, legally.
Kylie powers to a standing position and starts to run toward the Corps corner.
Cassava’s eyes go wide and she points dramatically at her heroine screaming “Duck!”
Kylie immediately bends at the waist placing her hands against the mat. Reiko’s arm whiffs through the space the veteran’s head occupied a split second before. The Japanese Invader doesn’t break her stride and sprints into the ropes, springing off them into a leap just as Kylie stands back up. Reiko shifts in the air like she’s going for a Crossbody then starts twisting in the air like a propeller. Sanders has the time to put her hands up and squeak a quick “No!” before she’s nailed in the face with a spectacular Corkscrew Flying Forearm.
youtu.be/xheAMH7TwNk?t=13
The Pleasant Valley Princess is knocked off her feet into a sprawl, her legs nearly fold over herself but fall back to thud against the canvas. Cassava covers her mouth with both hands looking worried, not for the match but for her precious, precious Iowan Princess.
Reiko kips up in a flash then eggs the booing crowd on with a forearm jerk. “Your idol is pathetic! A has-been who was propped up by greater women!”
She whips around to stare Cassava down, watching in satisfaction as The Superfan grinds her teeth at such blasphemy. She spits in her direction “You devoted your life to a paper tiger.”
Reiko walks over to the stain of Sanders on the floor and forces the beleaguered legend to turn onto her belly with a grip on her silvery bob. “You should just quit now,” Ohno shakes Sanders’ head to and fro by the roots till she gives a warbled cry, then pulls Kylie to her knees, “Save some respect for your careeaAAH!”
Kylie’s arms snake around Reiko’s calves and she tri the Invader. The brunette windmills her free arm as she falls onto her ass and sputters slanders in her native tongue as the platinum blonde flips and twists her with a bevy of amateur wrestling moves.
Even now with all that Kylie’s accomplished in her life, opponents still underestimate the pixie’s technical acumen to their regret. Reiko’s feeling those regrets now that she’s folded into a matchbook; her knees pressed tightly against her face, by a loop of Kylie’s arms ensnaring her head and legs in a pin that points her upturned ass to a shocked Seah.
“How about you beat me first before running your mouth?” Kylie grumbles as she tightens the noose.
Double Leg Cradle www.youtube.com/watch?v=H_24ne2lpt4
The official slides in for the count!
ONE!
TWO!
THR-Seah stomps hard on Kylie’s ribs to break the pin!
Preventing a blink-and-you’ll-miss-it loss at the last moment, Seah saves the Invasion by stomping a mudhole in some Sanders turf. The still hot and currently bothered vet curls up to protect herself under the Sinful attack.
Seah gets those knees up as she tries to turn Sanders 2-Dimensional one bootprint at a time, so incensed she is at the thought of losing another fight to this failure. So incensed she doesn’t see Onika speeding across the ring and trampling a rising Reiko.
At the last moment, she notices a peach-shaped ass filling her peripheral vision- Wham!
A flying Hip attack blasts Seah in the face, cheeks to cheek, dropping the illegal Invader to her side. Cassava grabs Seah by the collar and some material at the small of her back and lifts her off the canvas like luggage. The BMD carries the dizzy despoiler back to her corner, purposefully seesawing the red material of Sin's one-piece into her inner sanctum.
Cassava fights through Sin's flailing and threats that squeak with every tug on the wedgie.
"Try that shit again and I'll put you in retirement bitch!"
Any sense of decorum or civility disappears from the booty battler when it concerns the safety of Kylie Sanders. Cassava gives Sin the bum’s rush through the middle and bottom cables and lets her thwamp on the thin pads covering the outside, then she swings a leg over the middle ropes and cups her hands around her mouth as an amplifier to call to her inspirational partner, “That was amazing! I’m heading back to our corner. I’ll be there in a sec!”
While her callipygian compatriot dashes around the ring’s apron to home base, Kylie rises a moment before Ohno and clocks AI’s spokeswoman in the nose with a soup bone. Ohno staggers back with watering eyes then reels back a fist with a snarl but gets cut off with a Forearm Shiver to the chest, then a punch to the kidney, then a slap in the face! That stomp session must have knocked loose memories of training with Roxanne McCrimmon because she’s working up to a Boston Massacre.
Buoyed by the cheering throngs of FAWNatics, Kylie beats Reiko back nine-tenths of the ring, whipping the warmongering heel’s head to all points on a compass and welting her chest with Chops of every type. Kylie confronts her opponent with hard truths as she schools her in hard knocks.
“You’re not so tough without all the cheap shots huh!?”
She tags each breast with an Overhand Chop, each one accompanied by a shriek from Reiko and a ‘WOO!’ from the audience.
“If AI spent more time wrestling and less time blabbering you’d have challenged for the belt byUGHH!”
Kylie doubles over with a groan from a digging toekick. Reiko drags her nails down the midwestern mythos scalp and tugs her into a Headscissors.
“You should take your own advice, O bāchan.”
Reiko snags both of Sanders’ arms in Double Underhooks. She’s going for her finisher a jumping Facebuster called Ohno She Didn’n’!
Reiko lowers for the takeoff but Kylie slips free of one hook then slips behind the Invader and resets the hooks on her terms.
“I hoped to save this move for Cynthia one day,” explains Kylie as she drops to her knees and puts her forehead on the mat, stacking Reiko on her shoulders with a Backslide Pin.
“But you’ll do for a test run!”
www.youtube.com/watch?v=NppR4cwe_Ig
Ohno frantically kicks her legs as the ref drops beside the Invader. Seah starts coming through the ropes to interrupt the cover, but Cassava mirrors her movements across the ring and points a warning finger. “I will mess you up.”
ONE!
TWO!
Reiko slithers free and onto her knees with a second to spare Crack! And gets tagged with a Palm Strike by a fuming Sanders. Sporting a fresh handprint on her face with her vision spinning, Reiko falls onto her calves with the bottom cable supporting her upper back. Kylie shoots up from her seat and leaps toward Cassava’s eager, outstretched hand and finally tags her into the match!
The Milk Chocolate Mauler slides through the ropes, more than ready to impress. And that begins my racing toward Reiko, Ohno having reached her knees but no further when Cassava RAMS her face with a classic hip attack that rocks the Ninja with potentially concussive force.
The Superfan grabs the Invader with a double-hand grip of her bobbling head and hauls Ohno to fer feet. She tosses Reiko into a neutral corner, the increased power of Onika compared to Sanders immediately apparent.
Pivoting 90 degrees to open room for attack, Cassava gets to work, swinging a series of thumping kicks into Reiko’s golden-skinned breadbasket then raising the level to her chest, rapidly THWACKING Japanese torso time and time again. The crowd struggles to keep their count updated, ending with ‘TEN’ though the real count might be something closer to twelve.
With a grimacing Reiko unsteady before her, Cassava kicks the Invader’s feet out from under her, sending Ohno plopping to her backside, legs extended, awareness minimal.
Sensing an opportunity for payback on what the cruel Invaders did to her beloved Kylie, Cassava turns her back, or more importantly bum to the dazed Ohno and backs it up into Reiko’s face.
“So you want to see how phat my ass is?” the BMD Boss asks. “Have a taste.”
Cassava shoves the cake into Reiko’s features, swallowing them up, the Invader’s nose fitting neatly in the crease between her buns. Cakeface applied in thorough fashion, Ohno flails wildly as her air supply is cut, the Ninja with lips suckling on rear end rather than finding available oxygen. Reiko pushes against the miraculous thighs of the Mauler to no effect, her world in darkness with the up close and personal butt smother.
Topside, a beaming Cassava points to Sanders.
“This is for you,” she shouts.
“Well, I hope it’s more for her,” Ky chuckles to herself, giving Cassava a thumbs up.
With Castle’s count starting to grow, Onika pulls forward a step to break the count, in so doing letting a greasy-faced Reiko gasp for breath. The respite is momentary as Cassava RAMS her monumental derriere into Reiko’s mug then proceeds to twerk a ten-count of pelvic thrusts that batter Ohno’s face, her head bopping back and forth with each impact.
With the crowd roaring at the end of a more accurate ten-count, the Booty Blaster bounces away, literally, from the ravaged Reiko, Ohno little more than a grease spot, semi-conscious from the sensual attack.
Cassava’s has much more to her mission to make it impossible for Kylie to ever want any other tag partner.
Plucking Ohno off the canvas with a grasp on a wrist, she flings the Invader toward the opposite buckles with an Irish Whip. The impact of Reiko’s spine to the buckles shakes the ring and sends the wincing warrior staggering out to Onika who waits center stage.
In a single fluid motion, Cassava catches Ohno under her arms and launches Reiko HIGH into the Orlando sky. She pivots with the Ninja at her zenith and sits out, apparently trying and half-succeeding in DRIVING the Invader THROUGH the mat, Ohno’s body bouncing off the canvas before settling into a coma between the extended stems of the Mauler.
Rydeen Bomb ( www.youtube.com/watch?v=SrrQQi7QCG8 )
Cassava gathers Reiko’s limp legs and leans forward for the pin and the win with the…
ONE…
TWO…
Kylie’s attempt to intercept an entering Seah is only partially positive as Sin manages to bring Sanders with her into a pile-up atop the legal women and break Castle’s count.
The newly minted team of Iowans is jumbled with the Asian invaders. A confused Cassava grabs whoever’s behind her and turns with a right fist ready for pounding when she sees the anxious hazel eyes and sweat-soaked elfin features of her dream girl staring back.
Palms raised, Sanders offers a worried ‘WHOA’, thankful that her Superfan is able to stop in time.
“Sorry Miss Sanders.”
“It’s Kylie, Cassava. Let’s just go with Kylie.”
The delight is obvious on Onika’s joyful features…until a risen Sin NAILS Cassava’s temple with a superkick that sends the Mauler flopping onto a shoulder and hip. The Platinum Pixie scrambles to her feet but has the poor fortune to turn into a reloaded second superkick from Seah that spins Sanders in a pirouette.
The lights are on but no one’s home for the still vertical Ky, which is fine by the Little Dragon as she collects the blonde and bullies her to one corner while a recovering Reiko peels Cassava off the deck and whips her to the opposite one. Ohno follows in with a splash of the BMD champ that leaves Onika pliant and ready for heaving.
“You two simpletons need to know each other better to be a top tag team,” Seah shouts, “and I know Fat Ass wants nothing more, so let’s see if we can make a love connection.”
The Invaders silently signal to each other and simultaneously toss Cassava and Kylie on their way, ebony and ivory racing toward each other where mid-ring there’s a meeting of the minds AND bodies. The partners CRASH into each other, the slighter Sanders taking the worst as she’s flattened by the curvy Cassava. The Mauler is sent in a stumbling u-turn from the collision but is quickly decked by a spinning heel kick from the Japanese invader.
Spinning Heel Kick ( www.youtube.com/watch?v=9TvvS_y4oos&t=20s ) :19
The FAWNatics are amidst loud uproar with the Invaders wresting control from their favorites in underhanded fashion while an equally unhappy Castle demands Seah leave the legal confines immediately.
“Let me help you first,” the Invader insists, sinking a set of nails into the silvery bob of the legendary Hawkeye.
Sin rips a bewildered Kylie to her feet and bum rushes the Pixie to the ropes, heaving her over the top, Sanders crashing off the apron and plopping to an ignominious pool on the arena floor.
Seah raises her hands plaintively to Nick.
“I’m next. Don’t worry.”
Sin slips through the cables and drops boot soles to floor then STOMPS them into a defenseless Sanders, Ky’s body bruised as she’s left a mudhole by the rampaging Korean grappler.
Inside, Reiko scoops Cassava off the canvas and sends her to the ropes. The curvy Superfan rebounds off the cables at full speed and a waiting Ohno’s able to pluck her foe off the deck then deftly maneuver Onika across her shoulders into a modified Torture Rack position. But the Mauler’s only there for a moment.
The Invader spins with her cargo, dizzying the Booty Blaster before dropping to her knees and delivering her Ninja Backbreaker.
Ninja Backbreaker ( www.youtube.com/watch?v=zevJ_fi8cFA ) :17
Reiko spins to find a tumbling Onika come to rest on her abundant chest. She hooks her hands around the far side of Cassava’s rack and hips and pulls Onika toward her, rolling the melted Milk Chocolate Mauler to her back. Reiko mounts tight with a crossbody pin, collecting the far leg for insurance, the Invasion securing a beachhead with the victory at…
ONE…
TWO…
Cassava rips her thicc leg free and squirms to her side. Reiko hisses in anger and pulls back harshly on Cassava’s hair “Agh!” and paddles the BMD champ’s buns like she’s being punished for misbehaving.
“Know when you're beaten!”
Cassava cries out as her follicles are nearly freed, but it’s the butt blistering by the kunoichi that makes her eyes well up and spurs the dyed blonde to get up.
Reiko keeps her controlling grip on the fur of Kylie’s guard dog and lashes at Onika’s bulbous buns with a steady stream of forehand/backhand as she rises, the smacking and clapping sound creating its own applause amongst the echoing boos.
Her spanking hand getting tired, Reiko works Onika’s multicoloured locks into a makeshift ponytail and guides the whimpering young lioness to turn into a knee to the solar plexus, hunching the defender over.
“How can you stand being so out of shape?” Reiko chides as she guides Onika’s head under her left armpit and her arms under the dusky beauty in a reverse Full Nelson.
“If my ass jiggled like purin in an earthquake I’d die of shame.”
The Yokohama Mama falls back to the canvas and hurls Cassava overhead, then flips over into a sitting straddle of her opponent. With one knee on the mat and her other leg lying across Cassava’s lap, Reiko’s biceps flex magnificently as she reefs on the Butterfly lock.
www.youtube.com/watch?v=RA0ynTsZrGw
Biting the inside of her lip to deny Ohno a cry, Cassava wags a finger from side to side, an answer to ref Nick’s queries.
Reiko bounces in The BMD’s lap while she vigorously pumps the hold, making Cass flap her arms like a baby bird.
“You can tap or you can suffer alongside your aging crush in the hospital.”
Cassava sees red at that slander of Kylie and breathes out through her nose like an angry bull.
Using that highly trained ass of hers, Cassava begins to inch her way to the ropes; alternatively tensing each maximized glute with each lurch to waddle her way to the cables. Reiko incredulously looks over her shoulder to see Cassava’s toes wiggling closer to the bottom strand. Reiko plants her feet and rises with the Sanders wannabe in the submission.
“My gawd! Do you have bowling balls for implants?” Reiko complains.
Cassava stomps a heel on the toe of Ohno’s boot making her yelp. “Watch your mouth, never-was!” Cassava barks, “Maybe if you had some curves, you’d be less of a bitter bYYYTCH!”
The second syllable of Onika’s insult stretches and rises like a roller coaster when Reiko swings her into a swift arc that smacks her back and ass against the firm ring floor. Reiko bridged in the aftermath of the Butterfly Suplex then floats over into another crossbody pin; again hooking the far leg for insurance. The Invader grinds her forearm against Cassava’s cheek in disrespect. The ref smacks the canvas once, twice, but before the final third Cassava breaks free with a kick out resulting in a firm smack to the back of the head.
Outside the ring, parallel to the legal competitors, Seah’s still taking Kylie to the woodshed.
Palming the sides of the Platinum Pixie’s skull, The Little Dragon leans Kylie back and rams her face against the apron. Kylie groans and grasps at the Invader’s wrists but Sin keeps the pressure on her noggin and leans her back for another thudding meeting with the thinly covered plywood. And then another, and another, and onto the fourth brain scrambling.
Sin presses Kylie’s face hard against the rough texture of the apron and walks up that side of the ring, grinding the shrieking Pixie’s features against the mat like she means to rub her nose off! Reaching the end of the line, Sin presses a hand between Kylie’s shoulders to keep her against the apron.
“Will you be leeching off Fat Ass as you’ve done to all your other partners your entire career?”
Seeing Reiko paddle Onika’s big behind inspires Seah to swat Sanders’ much smaller tush with a clapping shot. The blonde yelps indignantly and kicks her feet while Seah looks at Kylie’s buns in irritation.
“You don’t even take a spank properly, Miriam lied in her Christmas cards!”
Taking Kylie by the wrist with both hands, the former Devil Doll takes a big step and buggy whips the decorated former champion back down the aisle, but Kylie drops into a crouch and reverses the Whip!
Seah speeds out of control and crashes into the steel steps. KLACLANG!!
Her body flips and bounces off the metal corners in a chiropractic nightmare of an impact. Seah writhes on the padded arena floor mouth forming a silent scream as Kylie exhales wearily and tenderly checks if her nose is in one piece.
“How the hell do people still remember those cards, is she still sending them?”
Setting that mystery aside for another night, Kylie turns to check on her partner and sees Cassava trying to shake off aches and pains and get to all fours. She gives a sigh of relief that her bootyiful partner wasn’t pinned while she was occupied, but there’s something wrong with this picture.
“Wait… where’s Reiko?”
“Hiiiyah!!”
The Ninja is flying from the top of the corner post! Reiko descends like a bird of prey and nearly bifurcates the beleaguered blonde with a Diving Karate Chop to the top of her dome.
Church bells ring inside Kylie’s skull as her eyes cross with a moan. She sinks to her knees like a deflating balloon. Reiko kicks Kylie in the chest folding her flat, thighs atop calves and purposefully steps on the American floormat’s belly on her way to collect Seah.
“Right where you belong, underfoot.”
The spokeswoman for the Asian Invasion hurriedly but gently guides Seah up and speedwalks her to their corner.
“Let’s capitalize while they’re still in pieces.”
Still feeling pangs from her collision with the steel steps, Sin grimaces as she nods and climbs back onto the apron, grabbing the tag rope as Reiko steps back through the ropes into the squared circle.
Ohno spreads her arms wide and flips off the booing arena attendees with a double bird as she strides over to Onika, who’s got her knees under her but hasn’t the strength to push off the mat, only managing to raise her plush patootie into the air.
Too irresistible a target to ignore, Reiko raises her arms into the air and turns those middle fingers into flat hands. She swings them down and ripples Onika’s cheek meat with a gaudy double spank.
“It is a bit addictive,“ Ohno remarks to Sin, walking around to The Superfan’s hair and pulling a whinging Cassava to her feet.
“After we beat them let’s tie this one to the guardrail, let everyone get a turUUURCK!!”
Cassava stops playing possum and strikes like a cobra; daggering her hand into Reiko’s open mouth and digging her fingers into a bundle of nerves under The Ninja’s tongue.
Mandible Claw (https://youtu.be/tBXjaz2iAAs?t=1240)
Cassava smiles spitefully at the fear in Reiko's eyes and the desperate gurgling sounds leaking from her mouth.
“If you were learning from Miss Sanders instead of trying to take her down, you might have won this match by now.”
Seah slaps the top buckle in frustration and swears in her native tongue. Powering through a possible concussion, Kylie trudges to the Western hemisphere corner with the help of the apron and uses the ropes to get to her feet. The sight of Cassava regaining control of the match helps clear most of the swirling spots from her vision. She claps in support and calls out, “We’re almost there! You can do it, Cass!”
Cassava whips her head around to the sound of her idol’s voice and gives her a confident nod before whipping back to Reiko, drawing the heel by the jaw closer to her face and whispering in glee, “I’m back on a nickname basis!”
Reiko raises an eyebrow and gurgles in confusion, bewildered at Cassava speaking to her like a school friend while slowly draining her consciousness with the strange agony. Ohno’s eyes begin to glaze over and she slowly drops to a kneel; she slaps and grabs at Cassava’s body looking for a handhold to stay up, but only manages to give the Mauler’s tits a groping squeeze before her hands trail onto her hips.
Wanting some payback for all the rudeness toward her icon of a tag partner, Cassava asks “Was all this foul behaviour just an excuse to feel me up?”
Cassava forces Reiko to shake her head in agreement; the fast motion makes lightning travel down her chin and robs her arms of life, they drop listlessly to the canvas as Reiko bleats.
“Well I’m flattered, but that’s no excuse to insult the greatest woman in wrestling-no, WORLD history! After we pin your asses you better apologiiIEE!”
Cassava’s voice raises two octaves when Reiko slaps her between the legs in a desperate move. The booty battler seizes and her knees quake, but she maintains the Claw, albeit slightly weaker.
Whap! Reiko slaps even harder on Main Street, the chance for freedom giving the Invader a second wind. Nick Castle waves a warning finger at Reiko.
“Stay out of her trunks, this isn’t a penthouse match!”
Cassava forces down a scream, wanting to be as composed as a diplomat in front of Kylie Sanders, but that display is somewhat ruined by her doubling over with intense trembling, causing all manner of movement in her moneymaker.
Both mesmerizing and terrifying Kylie with flashbacks to her early days against Lakeisha Bates. The veteran shakes off her PTSD via Rumpshaking and tries to support her young partner, “Just hold on a little longer, Cass! She’s almost out!”
With the angelic voice of the greatest Sanders in her ears, Cassava rallies and works the Claw like she trying to tear through Reiko’s soft underside. Tears run down Reiko’s cheeks and she lets out a bubbling moan, WHAP! and thumps her bicep against Cassava’s kitty!
Shooting off the mat microseconds after contact, Reiko disguises the low blow as a bodyslam stall, lifting Onika into the air and upside down, the junior Iowan’s fingers slipping from her mouth giving Reiko sweet relief. Her mouth’s thrumming with too much of an aftershock, so The Ninja just roars wordlessly as she breaks into a sprint with The BMD in hand. Slamming Onika into the canvas with a Running Bodyslam with rope-shaking strength!
Ohno’s body slaps onto Cassava’s in the followthrough of the move, beating a sigh out of The BMD that would have been a scream 30 seconds before. Ohno slithers onto Onika's wheezing body into a full body pin; she presses Cassava's wrists against the mat and hooks her ankles around the thicc contender's naked pair, spreading her legs wide in a Grapevine split.
ONE!
TWO!!
THR-
Cassava pops a shoulder up in time, saving the match and bullying Reiko's breast with her larger one. Reiko gives a harsh exhale in annoyance and pushes Cassava flat.
"This has become tedious."
She turns Cassava’s cheek with a bitchy slap and uses The Superfan’s tits as stress balls with a white-knuckled grip. Ignoring Onika’s writhing and whining, Reiko speaks over her shoulder to Seah.
“We keep her here and ring her out.”
Seah points her chin at Kylie across the ring
"We'll finish the job on the cream puff after the match."
Kylie didn't catch what they were saying but understood the intent. She beats a palm against her chest
"Why don’t you try something when I’m in the ring!? Or you afraid I’ll beat you again!?”
At the reminder of that once-in-a-lifetime fluke incident, Seah stares daggers at Kylie and draws her thumb across her throat,
“I’ll send you to the farm where they send aging pets and wrestlers before Youtube.”
Having grown tired of kneading Onika’s breasts like bread dough, Reiko pushes off the content creator and tags in her sister Invader. Seah vaults onto the top buckle in a crouch and shoots into the air like a Jill in the Box. With as much grace and power as the patriarch of masculine insanity, Sin twists in the air and lands an Elbow Drop across Onika’s hills. Cassava sits up with a jolt, cradling her second-best feature and gets shoved back down against the mat by Sin who climbs aboard in a seat on The Superfan’s bruised breasts.
ONE!
Cassava bucks Seah off into a kneel immediately then bleats when Sin punches her square in the face. Nick Castle issues a warning as she gets up to tag in Reiko.
“Watch the closed hands, Sin!”
He gets a noncommittal grunt from the Korean Killer as she leaves while Reiko mirrors Seah’s earlier vault, but faces away from the ring. Reiko throws herself backward in a spectacular Moonsault that ends with the wet smack! that accompanies a tummy-on-tummy impact. Cassava’s limbs spring into the air and flop back down lifeless. Reiko stays lying across the shuddering stalker, making a human plus sign as a cover.
ONE!
TWO!!
THRE-CASSAVA KICKS OUT!!!
The BMD exemplifies the kind of heart and grit that her partner and heroine, Kylie Sanders showed and inspired Cassava with her whole career. Reiko leans back onto her haunches and huffs angrily as Cassava rolls onto her elbows. She slaps Onika’s destructive buns as she rises.
“You’re like a sleeping bag filled with pudding.”
She tags Seah back into the match.
Kylie tries to pump up her partner by getting the FAWNatics to chant and clap.
“Come on, baby you can do this! Just make it over here! Ca-Ssa-Va! Ca-Ssa-Va!...”
The Corps starts to rally around their second in command by the will of their leader and a shiver runs through Cassava’s body. Her heart’s desire is cheering for her, and called Cassava baby... a flood of adrenaline and endorphins being to cascade down the Superfan’s person, numbing her pains and filling her with the energy to get to her feet.
Seah backs into the ropes and recoils into a run to the chocolate-dipped Kylie-copy.
“Stay down or get out down!”
Seah leaps and spins into a high Roundhouse Kick that would have sent Cassava’s coconut into the third row if she hadn’t dashed forward and caught Seah around the waist and thigh. The surprise of being caught stalls the Little Dragon’s long enough for Cassava to rise to the tiptoes of her powerful legs and misalign Seah’s spine with a sudden Powerbomb!
youtu.be/7R8lwpPDDAw?t=156
The reinvigorated Onika keeps her handholds and digs her fingers into Seah’s flesh, stacking the opposing martial artist on her shoulders for a flash pin.
Castle is on the canvas in a heartbeat and slaps the pine for a count of two before Seah violently twists out of The BMD’s grasp onto all fours.
“You lucky girl,” Seah rasps as she rushes to stand, “that one wrestling class paid offugh!”
Cassava snatches her by the ears and pulls her into a Kneelift to the gut, then takes her off her feet with a Hiptoss that bounces Seah’s lower back off the ring floor. Cassava pulls the cringing wyrm off the canvas with a fistful of hair.
“You don’t know it yet, but you’re in the middle of a Sanders-run.”
Confused, Sin almost asks if Cassava means she’s about to tag Kylie in or reveal some kind of familial relation when the Milk Chocolate Mauler takes a big step back, drops her shapely hips and launches Sin to the corner parallel to Kylie with an Irish Whip. Seah manages to turn in time but judging by the THUD-D-D of the vibrating corner it is of little benefit. The power turns off in Seah’s legs and she slides to a painful seat against the buckles groaning at the pain and the future bill from her chiropractor.
Onika speeds to the far corner from her prey. Gripping the top rope, she places a foot on the middle buckle and lightly paddles the raised glute to get the flesh enticingly wobbling. She calls out to the crowd (but mostly to Kylie)
“Here comes the BOOM, baby!”
She rockets across the ring. Seah sees a bad future coming and wills herself to move to safety but will alone isn’t enough. Onika’s proud ass hits the Korean woman’s face like a baseball bat in the hands of a Major Leaguer!
www.youtube.com/watch?v=f_opCfcf_g0
The Orlando audience has been booing The Asian Invasion all night but they collectively“OOOHH!!” in sympathy watching Seah’s head whiplash over the bottom turnbuckle.
Reiko bites her lower lip nervously and fiddles with the tag rope in her fist. Even Kylie winces at the destructive power in her partner’s buns.
I don’t want to be on the other end of that wrecking ball, is the glaring thought in the blonde’s mind as she watches Cassava scoop Seah up, turn her away and chest her into the corner. Flashing a quick smile at Kylie, Cassava snares her arms around Seah’s tummy and forces the two of them into a backroll. As Cassava spins back onto her feet she pops off the canvas to her full height, using the momentum to throw Seah back and plant her shoulders on the mat, bridging to keep the villain upended, the Rolling German Suplex a clear callback to Kylie’s early years.
OVER AND DONE
www.youtube.com/watch?v=zIKlY8V9SUc
ONE!
TWO!!
THRE-
Reiko sprints into the ring and soccer kicks Onika in the side, knocking the two over. Sin puddles on the mat rocked by the cannonade of Cassava offence, as Reiko puts the boots to the booty battler for staying their win for another minute.
“You! Are! Trash!” Reiko punctuates each word with a stomp, “You! Will! Not! StoaGH!”
Kylie comes flying to her partner’s rescue with a Double Axe-handle from the top rope bringing her joined fists down on the top of Ohno’s skull.
“Don’t mess with Plesant Valley!”
Grabbing Reiko’s wrist as she staggers back, Kylie buggywhips the Japanese heel to the ropes and speeds after her. Reiko’s two steps off the rebound of the cables before Sanders’ shoulder hits her gut with a Spear that could put the lightweight in the XFL; Kylie sacks her foe like lunch and leaves her gasping on the mat. After rising to a knee, Ky cranes her neck and sees Cassava and Seah crawling to their respective corners with her Number One Fan much farther ahead.
“Be right there!”
Kylie bounds across the ring ahead of Cassava and slips into position behind the ropes just as her partner is within tagging distance. Kylie extends her palm and Cassava reaches up and happily smacks it with hers, bringing the veteran back into battle.
“I made good on setting them up at least,” Cassava japes with a flinch as she rolls onto the apron, the fading of the adrenaline allowing ignored soreness to reclaim her bruised but beautiful body.
Kylie pats her on the navel before she chases after The Invasion, making Cassava stifle a gasp “I like knocking them down anyway.”
Sin is mere feet from her home corner, though it is empty with Reiko still struggling to breathe on the canvas. Not that it would have mattered. Coming up on her six, Kylie leapfrogs into a double foot stomp on Sin’s back pinning her like a fly to the canvas. Kylie hops off her unwilling cushion and drags the squirming Dragon along the rough surface, closer to the American side of the ring.
“You’ve been such a pain in our asses I’m bringing out something special, no take-backs.”
Seah finds herself pulled to verticality by her one-piece and tucked into a Front Facelock. She beats punches against the false idol’s hip in a bid for freedom, but the bootying Seah suffered has taken the starch out of her blows.
Kylie places one of Seah’s arms over her neck and works her fingers under the hemline of a leghole for an extra secure grip on her quarry.
“With a strained “Up!” leaving her lips, Kylie points the Little Dragon’s boots into the air, the two forming a human pillar. Onika’s heart flutters thinking it’s going to be a Brainbuster tribute to The Superfan’s other great love and the third in their yet-to-be-made (or mentioned) relationship, Emily West. It is not. It is however a callback to Kylie’s meaner but victorious days; The Pleasant Valley Princess holds Seah steady for three seconds then suddenly genuflects, bringing Seah’s neck with all her weight behind it onto Kylie’s bended knee!
Pleasant Dreams: www.youtube.com/watch?v=onLxf9TCQ8A
The Senseless Sin falls onto her rear after her disastrous impact with her chin to her chest, then droops to the ring floor on her side and cheek. Kylie leans over to pull her into a pin when thudding footsteps divert her attention to her blindside; Reiko’s up, running and roaring with a knee aiming toward the lone white woman’s temple.
THUMP!
Ohno gets intercepted by a Flying Crossbody from Cassava!
Spying on The Ninja from afar, Cassava copied her idol’s save from a minute before and jumped from the top of her corner to squash the interfering Invader. The BMD bounces off Reiko onto her feet like the heel was a trampoline and shares a look with Kylie.
A moment of wordless communication occurs and the two Iowans break out in wild smiles.
Somehow the crowd knows what’s coming and they’re already on their feet! Moving in perfect unison, the leaders of the Kylie Corps pull the Asian Invasion up by their silky hair and lift them into dueling Fireman’s Carries.
“Pleasant!” Kylie screams out as she lowers into a deep crouch.
“Valley!” Cassava hollers, mirroring her spiritual center and sinking her haunches closer to the ground.
“DRIVER!!” The Corps shakes the very foundation of the arena with their cry as Sanders and Onika hit simultaneous PVDs.
www.youtube.com/watch?v=sFD5dEtKJqY
The Asian Invasion display their years of finely crafted teamwork by collapsing into matching starfishes on the mat after the ring finishes shaking after that detour to Pleasant Valley.
While not official, Cassava swings a leg over and feeds Reiko some Cake with a Reverse Facesit while flattening the Invader’s bust with her palms. In a bit of mischief and solidarity, Kylie performs a rare Facesit and feeds the slumbering Seah some Vanilla flavoured Cake.
Castle lowers for the count as Cassava beams and gives Kylie a double thumbs up, while still pressing down Reiko’s breasts of course. “Amazing!”
ONE!
TWO!!
THREE!!!
DINGDINGDING!!
At the victory bell’s first chime, Cassava lunges from her perch on Ohno’s nose and nearly bowls Kylie over with a tackle of a hug. Nearly. Cassava makes sure to pull Miss Sanders back into position on Seah’s face, involuntarily guiding her on a grind that puts the platinum blond on the road to going ‘Old School’.
Trying not to blush, Kylie pats Cassava on the head and tries to coax her to let go before she breaks something with this Bearhug.
“Great win, Cass. We did it!”
Cassava squeezes even tighter much to her partner’s chagrin.
“Hell yeah, we did! All thanks to you!”
Kylie accepts a lifeline from Nick who pulls them to their feet and gets between the Pleasant Valley powerhouses to raise their hands in victory. So excited that she’s sharing a win with The Icon, Kylie Sanders, Onika breaks from the official and scampers up the buckles of a corner.
“Woooo!!”
The Superfan has her clenched hands in the air and screaming like she just won Mania’s main event.
Kylie raises her eyebrows and gives a surprised laugh.
“Damn, maybe I should keep her around and make every fight a title match.”
Caught up by her partner’s energy, Kylie runs up a set of buckles and gives a “Wooo!” to her Corps as well.
The Asian invasion slinks off quietly as Kylie and Cassava celebrate, in no shape or mood to get their revenge. But tomorrow’s another day…
Sanders recoils lightly off the cables and hops back in the ring. She wipes some sweat from her forehead with the back of her hand and sees Cassava has left the ring to grab something by the commentator’s table. As she slides into the ring, Kylie sees it’s a microphone in Cassava’s hands.
“Miss Sanders, Kylie! Sorry.”
The BMD has the beginnings of tears in her eyes from happiness. One hand holds the mic to her lips while the other gestures wildly, “Teaming with you has been a dream come true.”
Shocked murmurs stir in the crowd as Cassava lowers to one knee, “and I’m hoping you’ll agree to make another dream of mine real…..”
A cold sweat starts to run down Kylie’s back. Oh God, she isn’t about to propose, is she?
“Will you have a match with me? Against me? Cassava Onika vs The Kylie Sanders!”
“Well damn. I’ve got a sweet tooth, but I don’t know if I can handle that much cake.”
Ky turns to her Corps, toothy grin emerging.
“Whaddya all think?”
Overcome with the idea of the Platinum Pixie sharing the ring with her Superfan and seeing if the idol or the obsessive devotee comes out on top, they soon begin chanting “YES…YES…YES!”
The mantra quickly reaches ear-splitting levels and Sanders turns back to Cassava. She motions for her fan to rise and offers her hand in a shake.
“I guess you got yourself a match.”
A giddy Cassava grabs the proffered mitt and tugs Kylie into a bearhug.
“Thank you…thank you…thank you…you don’t know how happy…”
Kylie gurgles out a playful “I think I do” between gasping breaths. “Please…down.”
“Oh…sorry…Miss…Kylie.”
Recovering her oxygen, Sanders holds up a palm.
“It’s OK. I’m happy to make dreams come true and you’ve earned this one.”
Cassava swoons but catches herself before completely melting to the canvas.
“But don’t think beating me is going to be easy,” Kylie adds. I’ve still got some fight left in me.”
“No…no,” the Milk Chocolate Mauler insists. “I know this will be the favorite match of my life, but just as much I know it will be the toughest.”
Ky nods and grabs Cassava’s near wrist, raising it high as she turns to the hard cam.
“Then it’s a date,” Kylie pronounces.
Those words turn Cassava’s legs to jelly. Sanders catches her partner before Onika slips to her knees. A beaming Pixie helps the BMD back to full vertical and a final shoulder to shoulder embrace by the Iowans leads to a promo for tonight’s title matches.
( www.youtube.com/watch?v=PfsbLhptmS4 )
With the sellout throng doing its best to drown out the music, the aptly named Seah Sin strides to center stage with her compatriot Reiko Ohno alongside. Of course, there is no Yuko Ogura accompanying, FAWN’s most famous manager sent packing years ago. However, the Mach Two version of the Asian Invasion still packs a lethal punch on occasion.
SEAH SIN
REIKO OHNO
Reiko demands the assembled show their reverence but when it’s not forthcoming, the duo head down the ramp and aisle without satisfaction.
The Korean and Japanese grapplers are garbed respectively in matching shiny, red one-piece outfits. Their gear plunges from cleavage to navel, the triangular opening strategically covered in black mesh. Red pads and ankle boots finish the attire. Dark hair flows down Ohno’s back while a cinnamon-brown mane courses over Sin’s shoulders.
The Invaders stalk toward the ring, staying out of range of the fan’s dirty paws if not their crass voices. Seah and Reiko cast surly glances in their direction, occasionally demanding the Orlando rabble shut their mouths, telling the imbeciles to watch and learn as they destroy two of FAWN’s favorites.
As they reach the ring, Reiko grabs a microphone from an attendant and draws it to her lips.
“You’re going to remember this night for a long time,” Ohno shouts as she ascends the ring steps. “This will be the first step in our final success to commander this company.”
Reiko takes a seat on the middle strand before pushing up the top, leaving her partner plenty of room to enter. Sin slips through and the Yokohama Mama enters behind, the Invaders moving to the middle and pointing their snarling features to the hard cam.
“The Girl Scout and the Fat Ass will not know what to do when we beat them down,” Ohno informs. “But they will when we capture and torture them. The only thing they can do. TAP OUT!”
The bellowing crowd is enraged and lets the Invaders know.
“Sanders. You survived the Little Dragon only with the help of your underling with the big backside. Tonight. There will be no one to save either of you from the Invasion. The Ninja and the Dragon will make both of you the ultimate victims of AI.”
The crowd continues to voice its boisterous displeasure as Reiko drops the mic. The treacherous team from the far side of the Pacific Rim moves to their corner, the Invaders’ attention shifting to the upper stage.
Minutes before in the Gorilla Position, Kylie Sanders glances at the curtain, bouncing on the balls of her feet and performing some light shadow boxing to warm up. She lets out a nervous breath, “Whew… here we go.” The butterflies that flare up in her stomach before every match brought friends tonight. Asian Invasion is an experienced, decorated tag team with a lot of skill to go with practiced cruelty. And she’s going to face them with someone she’s never tagged with before. Cassava Onika, a skilled young woman who’s consistently claimed to be her biggest fan even after Kylie used and ditched her. But if the red flags signal true, the Sri Lankan shortstack has some extreme stalker tendencies.
She looks over to Cassava seeing the Buns of Mass Destruction champion warming up as well, stretching and jogging in place to work all the kinks out before she participates in the most important match of her life so far. Teaming with her heroine, guiding light, and if The Superfan has her way future wife, Kylie Sanders!
Cassava lowers into a series of Cossack Squats to activate her legs and open up her hips for all the attacks she’ll be throwing out later. She looks up at her temporary(for now) partner with a cheerful, determined expression, “I’m not gonna let you down tonight, Miss Sanders. I’ll set ‘em up, knock ‘em down and leave them ready for you to pin!”
For a second Kylie stares down silently at Cassava, distracted by the devoted Corps Captain’s swaying cleavage before she catches herself and answers back, pondering that Cassava should send her puberty a Thank You card. “Save some of them for me, I need payback from the times those two twits jumped me. I’ve seen what you can do, so I know that if we stay focused, together we can send these two packing.”
Cassava shoots up like she’s been shot out of cannon and a startled Kylie steps back, nearly chin checked by The Superfan’s jiggling frontage. “Hell yeah, we will! We’re gonna give them a heaping serving of Cake before sending them on a drive to Pleasant Valley!”
Kylie smiles and nods in agreement but tinged with worry, she appreciates the enthusiasm but it’s still a bit much. She spots an oncoming attendant who gives her a silent signal, “Looks like it’s game time, let’s do this!”
Onika pumps her fist in the air “Woo!”
The glorious, melodious and upbeat Sixpence None The Richer’s ‘There She Goes’ sweeps through the arena, Kylie’s Corps roaring to their collective feet. Kylie offered to come out to Onika’s theme song in a show of solidarity, but the Milk Chocolate Mauler insisted on the veteran’s song as it fulfilled one of her MANY Sanders-related dreams.
www.youtube.com/watch?v=tMfXeuv4kZE
Ky and Cassava push through the curtains and moves to center stage, reveling in and playing to the crowd. Their volume proves Kylie might have more collective love being sent in her direction than even her celebrated Girl Scout days, and Cassava’s fanbase may not be far behind. The silvery-bobbed, elfin beauty and the dyed-blonde curvaceous cutie pump their fists and the Corps responds.
KYLIE SANDERS
Drawing on the echoes of her original gear, but slightly altered to go more in with the black instead of the gold, Sanders dons a black sports bra topside with black boy-cut shorts. Both the top and bottom are trimmed in yellow-gold. Black boots and pads finish the ensemble.
www.yandy.com/products/lets-mesh-around-bra-set
On her way to the ring Cassava pauses for a quick twerk with a fan cosplaying as Shea London causing Sanders to scrunch her face and stifle a giggle as booty battler calls out, “This is just like my dream last night!” The host of FAWN Finds is dressed for battle in a white tank top that shows a hint of her belly button, a red bra is visible through the thin fabric that's barely keeping her F Cup breasts from flashing the fans as she bounces to and fro. On her wide hips is a pair of pink booty shorts that seemed painted on and a size too small for the ass that breaks hearts and faces. She chooses to wrestle in bare feet like her hero Kylie Sanders once did, that worship clearly bleeding into her wardrobe and choice of hair dye (blonde with pink highlights).
CASSAVA ONIKA
A beaming Sanders and Onika walk the aisle, happy to slap hands with their fans, enjoying the chants of ‘KY-LEE’ and ‘CAS-SA-VA’. A few pockets of unforgiving fans attempt to continue with the ‘TROLL…TROLL…TROLL” chant of Kylie’s less popular times. She takes it in stride and goes on her way, but Cassava stops to kick the guardrail angrily and points at the chastised group with a threatening expression, “Don’t disrespect a legend!”
The two lightweights make their way down the ramp and when reaching the ring, Cassava bounds up the steel steps and sits on the middle strand, pushing up the top making a gap for Sanders to step through. As she does, the former Vanilla Chill pats Cassava on the back, the slight touch from her obsession makes The Superfan break out in gooseflesh.
Asian Invasion stalk out of their corner eager to get this execution over with and Kylie quickly goes to butt heads with the bullying Invaders, Cassava’s a half-step behind ready to lay down her life as a bodyguard. The speedy Official quickly steps between them insisting on separation, “Not before the bell! Not before the bell!”
Before the Iowan duo head to their corner, Cassava reaches into her cleavage with two fingers, she pulls out some note cards and hands them to the announcer. Giving them a quick once-over, he raises an eyebrow but doesn’t protest, raising the microphone to his lips he heralds,
“From Pleasant Valley, Iowa… She stands five feet, two inches tall, and weighs in tonight at one hundred twenty-five pounds… She is the woman of 1,000 Hip attacks and the first, current, and only Buns of Mass Destruction Champion...this is Cassava Onika!!”
“Her partner tonight; a Television champion. Lightweight champion. Two-time Tag team champion uncrowned in her first run due to interference by management. Intercontinental champion. Wwooorrrld Chaampioonnn!!!” The announcer really puts some jazz on the high point of Kylie’s or what would be any wrestler’s career. The woman herself is smiling both pleased and a little embarrassed, she lowers and shakes her head. "I remember this from last time."
The announcer continues, “She holds the FAWN record for most matches and wins. The top merchandise mover for multiple years. A FAWN Wrestler of the Year. Has been on the cover of Gladiatrix over 20 times. Has a Bachelor’s Degree from the University of Iowa. Has beaten Emily West more times than anyone else in history. She brushes three times a day...”
As the announcer keeps going… and going, Seah Sin angrily paces back and forth, growing more impatient with every syllable droning from the idiot’s mouth. Reiko Ohno has to be restrained by the official to keep from ripping the mic from his hand, “This is propaganda! A show of bias! A stalling tactic to save a has-been and her pear-shaped toadie!”
“She has a holiday named after her in Pleasant Valley. A future Hall of Famer. She upset the gameboard of The Black Court. The founder of Hot & Bothered. Her best friend is from Nnnnnice, France! A goddess of the harvest. The cream in your coffee. The Ace in the deck. The perfect medium between cute and sexy. A cold scoop of Vanilla on a hot day. The Platinum Pixie, Kyliiiie Saanderrrrrs!!
As Kylie’s name is spoken, Cassava spins her right fist at the elbow, and as he finishes Cassava jumps forward with the momentum of her arm, throwing up a triumphant fist into the air to cap off the retelling of Sanders’ storied career. This blatant display of fangirlism gets them a burst of applause and laughter from the audience, and twin death stares from the Asian Invasion.
For Kylie, she can’t help but appreciate Onika’s effort, grinning widely. As the Iowans move to their corner, Sanders offers a soft “Bring it in” to her biggest fan.
Cassava doesn’t hesitate, giving the blonde a tight hug that draws a gasp from the Pixie.
“A little less. A little less,” Ky huffs breathlessly.
The BMD champ releases, her body vibrating with excitement from the embrace.
“Do you want to go first?” Kylie asks.
“I…I…want what you want,” Onika stammers.
What neither of them want are the Invaders rushing across the canvas before the bell, Seah laying into Sanders with a double axhandle to the back of the Hawkeye’s skull and Reiko sending a forearm shiver to the jaw of a turning Cassava.
“The war to end all wars doesn’t begin on your time,” Sin informs, pounding Ky into the corner, Sanders doing her best to cover up but she’s dazed from the sneak attack.
FAWN’s lead ref Nick Castle tries to gain control. Ohno does it for him to a degree, blasting Cassava with another forearm shiver then grabbing her foe by a wrist and shoulder and heaving the pneumatic Milk Chocolate Mauler up and over the top rope, Cassava first crashing to the apron then tumbling to the floor.
When it appears Reiko will follow Cassava out of her own accord, slipping a leg between the cables, Castle calls for the bell, happy to have two women in the ring, even if the start is a dubious one. But as soon as the claxon call echoes through the arena, Reiko pulls her leg back in.
With Ky cornered, the Invaders move to either side and take turns delivering side kick after side kick to the Pixie’s chest, Seah from Ky’s left and Reiko from the right. After a half-dozen detonating boots, each grabs a wrist and bullies her halfway down the length of the ring.
Together, the Korean and Japanese grapplers point their foe to the opposite strands and send Ky racing with a double Irish Whip. The Ninja and the Little Dragon surge to center stage, waiting for the return of Sanders. Dipping, they each lift and heave an alabaster lower limb of the reborn Girl Scout…and Kylie SOARS into a front flip over the top, CRASHING to her spine several feet beyond the Invaders from the dual back body drop.
Kylie arches in anguish, hand pressed to the base of her backbone.
Thankfully for Ky, Castle intercedes, locking elbows with Reiko and steering the Yokohama native toward home base.
Sin’s more than happy to continue the beatdown on her own, lifting Kylie from a seated position and leaning the Platinum Pixie deep into her corner. She pivots away from Ky and lights her adversary up with a meaty THWACK, Seah’s knife-edge chop sending a reflexive ‘WOOO’ through the audience.
The Little Dragon sends fire into Sanders’ chest once more, CRACKING in a second backhand blow, a welt quickly emerging just above Ky’s modest cleavage. Sin has a third prepared when she notices Cassava climbing to her designated spot on the apron and, breaking from her attack on the FAWN legend, she lays an overhand slap to Onika’s massive bounty.
Wincing in pain, her lids momentarily clenching from the sting, Cassava opens them and has fire in her eyes, not so much from the attack on her but the underhanded assault on the would-be paramour of her dreams.
Cassava bolts partially through the ropes when Seah shoves Nick into the furious Mauler.
“Keep that cheater out of the ring,” Seah shouts.
Castle does his best, trying to calm Cassava less than successfully. But he does push her back out of the ring, Onika going ballistic in Nick’s arms as she watches over the man’s shoulders as the Dragon sends a raised knee between Kylie’s ivory stems.
Sanders rises to tiptoes, hazel eyes watering, jaw dropping as her hands move between her thighs, a barely audible chirp of agony escaping her Cupid’s Arrow lips.
The Korean gleefully waves at the BMD champ from Castle’s blind spot, playing with her emotions.
Cassava fights the overwhelming urge to scrap her way to Seah through the official. She bites her lower lip and reaches to tag Ky’s shoulder instead, but Sin pulls a waddling Sanders out of range before Cassava can tag her way in.
Moving a knock-kneed Pixie to the middle of the ring, Seah unleashes a pair of judo chops to each nape of Kylie’s neck, sending the faltering veteran to her haunches in front of the rampaging Invader. Sin turns to taunt Sanders’ partner.
“Just think, tagging with this trash is your dream,” Seah chuckles. “And you’re never going to see the inside of the ring as her legal partner.”
Onika calls out to a depleted Sanders and Kylie turns her head in Cassava’s direction, hands still buried in her crotch.
“Ah ah,” Sin tsks, before thrashing a back heel kick into Kylie’s right temple that sends Sanders collapsing to her back in a spreadeagle. Seah genuflects a knee onto the cleft of Kylie’s bruised bosom, raising her hands triumphantly for the…
ONE…
TWO…
Kylie shoves the leg off, keeping the newly minted team alive and Cassava’s fantasy a reality for at least a few more seconds.
Sanders rolls to her chest and slithers toward her big-booty salvation, but Sin isn’t having it.
The Korean moves to a standing forward-facing straddle of the Pixie then drops to a crouch, driving her petite rear end into the base of Ky’s spine. Reaching forward, Seah laces her fingers and slips them under the Hawkeye’s chin. With Kylie’s head cupped from below, Sin yanks back on her chinlock, arching the Iowan.
A wincing Sanders stares at the outstretched hand of her superfan but is unable to get closer, Kylie just trying to survive the growing knots in her back.
“Ask her,” Seah demands.
Castle reacts as required.
Sin forces Kylie to nod, but FAWN’s lead ref is too experienced for such a ploy, Nick correctly interpreting a grunt in the negatory form the Iowan as the official response.
A frustrated Little Dragon releases her grip and grabs Ky’s platinum bob, forcing the beleaguered Sanders up with her. Shifting her grip, Sin tosses Ky away with an Irish Whip and quickly races behind. Rebounding out of the cables, Kylie stretches her right arm wide, but Seah has the same idea and the two connect with simultaneous clotheslines that rip each combatant off the deck in violent fashion.
The grapplers end in single files, arms over their heads, boots pointed in opposite directions, staring blankly at the rafters.
Castle starts a dual ten-count on the flattened fighters, the crowd and Cassava reacting with synchronized rhythmic claps, trying their best to will Kylie to her partner before Seah can make a tag to her friendly neighborhood ninja.
“You got this, Miss Sanders!” Cassava yells out while keeping on beat.
“I’m right here, you can do it! They’re nothing next to you!”
The Corps Commander’s echoing supportive tones rouse Kylie at the count of “FIVE!” and stirs Kylie to roll to all fours. Unfortunately, it has the opposite reaction with Seah to a similar result; to the Korean Invader, the shrill ass-kissing of The Fat Ass is so irritating Seah awakes with a growl.
“Grrrr…. will her blabbing never cease?”
Sanders was on the move first but is much farther from her corner and moving slowly from the beginning onslaught. Sin covers her shorter distance swiftly by throwing herself into a somersault and leaping out to Clap! hands with Reiko and brings the Yokohama Mama into the match, legally.
Kylie powers to a standing position and starts to run toward the Corps corner.
Cassava’s eyes go wide and she points dramatically at her heroine screaming “Duck!”
Kylie immediately bends at the waist placing her hands against the mat. Reiko’s arm whiffs through the space the veteran’s head occupied a split second before. The Japanese Invader doesn’t break her stride and sprints into the ropes, springing off them into a leap just as Kylie stands back up. Reiko shifts in the air like she’s going for a Crossbody then starts twisting in the air like a propeller. Sanders has the time to put her hands up and squeak a quick “No!” before she’s nailed in the face with a spectacular Corkscrew Flying Forearm.
youtu.be/xheAMH7TwNk?t=13
The Pleasant Valley Princess is knocked off her feet into a sprawl, her legs nearly fold over herself but fall back to thud against the canvas. Cassava covers her mouth with both hands looking worried, not for the match but for her precious, precious Iowan Princess.
Reiko kips up in a flash then eggs the booing crowd on with a forearm jerk. “Your idol is pathetic! A has-been who was propped up by greater women!”
She whips around to stare Cassava down, watching in satisfaction as The Superfan grinds her teeth at such blasphemy. She spits in her direction “You devoted your life to a paper tiger.”
Reiko walks over to the stain of Sanders on the floor and forces the beleaguered legend to turn onto her belly with a grip on her silvery bob. “You should just quit now,” Ohno shakes Sanders’ head to and fro by the roots till she gives a warbled cry, then pulls Kylie to her knees, “Save some respect for your careeaAAH!”
Kylie’s arms snake around Reiko’s calves and she tri the Invader. The brunette windmills her free arm as she falls onto her ass and sputters slanders in her native tongue as the platinum blonde flips and twists her with a bevy of amateur wrestling moves.
Even now with all that Kylie’s accomplished in her life, opponents still underestimate the pixie’s technical acumen to their regret. Reiko’s feeling those regrets now that she’s folded into a matchbook; her knees pressed tightly against her face, by a loop of Kylie’s arms ensnaring her head and legs in a pin that points her upturned ass to a shocked Seah.
“How about you beat me first before running your mouth?” Kylie grumbles as she tightens the noose.
Double Leg Cradle www.youtube.com/watch?v=H_24ne2lpt4
The official slides in for the count!
ONE!
TWO!
THR-Seah stomps hard on Kylie’s ribs to break the pin!
Preventing a blink-and-you’ll-miss-it loss at the last moment, Seah saves the Invasion by stomping a mudhole in some Sanders turf. The still hot and currently bothered vet curls up to protect herself under the Sinful attack.
Seah gets those knees up as she tries to turn Sanders 2-Dimensional one bootprint at a time, so incensed she is at the thought of losing another fight to this failure. So incensed she doesn’t see Onika speeding across the ring and trampling a rising Reiko.
At the last moment, she notices a peach-shaped ass filling her peripheral vision- Wham!
A flying Hip attack blasts Seah in the face, cheeks to cheek, dropping the illegal Invader to her side. Cassava grabs Seah by the collar and some material at the small of her back and lifts her off the canvas like luggage. The BMD carries the dizzy despoiler back to her corner, purposefully seesawing the red material of Sin's one-piece into her inner sanctum.
Cassava fights through Sin's flailing and threats that squeak with every tug on the wedgie.
"Try that shit again and I'll put you in retirement bitch!"
Any sense of decorum or civility disappears from the booty battler when it concerns the safety of Kylie Sanders. Cassava gives Sin the bum’s rush through the middle and bottom cables and lets her thwamp on the thin pads covering the outside, then she swings a leg over the middle ropes and cups her hands around her mouth as an amplifier to call to her inspirational partner, “That was amazing! I’m heading back to our corner. I’ll be there in a sec!”
While her callipygian compatriot dashes around the ring’s apron to home base, Kylie rises a moment before Ohno and clocks AI’s spokeswoman in the nose with a soup bone. Ohno staggers back with watering eyes then reels back a fist with a snarl but gets cut off with a Forearm Shiver to the chest, then a punch to the kidney, then a slap in the face! That stomp session must have knocked loose memories of training with Roxanne McCrimmon because she’s working up to a Boston Massacre.
Buoyed by the cheering throngs of FAWNatics, Kylie beats Reiko back nine-tenths of the ring, whipping the warmongering heel’s head to all points on a compass and welting her chest with Chops of every type. Kylie confronts her opponent with hard truths as she schools her in hard knocks.
“You’re not so tough without all the cheap shots huh!?”
She tags each breast with an Overhand Chop, each one accompanied by a shriek from Reiko and a ‘WOO!’ from the audience.
“If AI spent more time wrestling and less time blabbering you’d have challenged for the belt byUGHH!”
Kylie doubles over with a groan from a digging toekick. Reiko drags her nails down the midwestern mythos scalp and tugs her into a Headscissors.
“You should take your own advice, O bāchan.”
Reiko snags both of Sanders’ arms in Double Underhooks. She’s going for her finisher a jumping Facebuster called Ohno She Didn’n’!
Reiko lowers for the takeoff but Kylie slips free of one hook then slips behind the Invader and resets the hooks on her terms.
“I hoped to save this move for Cynthia one day,” explains Kylie as she drops to her knees and puts her forehead on the mat, stacking Reiko on her shoulders with a Backslide Pin.
“But you’ll do for a test run!”
www.youtube.com/watch?v=NppR4cwe_Ig
Ohno frantically kicks her legs as the ref drops beside the Invader. Seah starts coming through the ropes to interrupt the cover, but Cassava mirrors her movements across the ring and points a warning finger. “I will mess you up.”
ONE!
TWO!
Reiko slithers free and onto her knees with a second to spare Crack! And gets tagged with a Palm Strike by a fuming Sanders. Sporting a fresh handprint on her face with her vision spinning, Reiko falls onto her calves with the bottom cable supporting her upper back. Kylie shoots up from her seat and leaps toward Cassava’s eager, outstretched hand and finally tags her into the match!
The Milk Chocolate Mauler slides through the ropes, more than ready to impress. And that begins my racing toward Reiko, Ohno having reached her knees but no further when Cassava RAMS her face with a classic hip attack that rocks the Ninja with potentially concussive force.
The Superfan grabs the Invader with a double-hand grip of her bobbling head and hauls Ohno to fer feet. She tosses Reiko into a neutral corner, the increased power of Onika compared to Sanders immediately apparent.
Pivoting 90 degrees to open room for attack, Cassava gets to work, swinging a series of thumping kicks into Reiko’s golden-skinned breadbasket then raising the level to her chest, rapidly THWACKING Japanese torso time and time again. The crowd struggles to keep their count updated, ending with ‘TEN’ though the real count might be something closer to twelve.
With a grimacing Reiko unsteady before her, Cassava kicks the Invader’s feet out from under her, sending Ohno plopping to her backside, legs extended, awareness minimal.
Sensing an opportunity for payback on what the cruel Invaders did to her beloved Kylie, Cassava turns her back, or more importantly bum to the dazed Ohno and backs it up into Reiko’s face.
“So you want to see how phat my ass is?” the BMD Boss asks. “Have a taste.”
Cassava shoves the cake into Reiko’s features, swallowing them up, the Invader’s nose fitting neatly in the crease between her buns. Cakeface applied in thorough fashion, Ohno flails wildly as her air supply is cut, the Ninja with lips suckling on rear end rather than finding available oxygen. Reiko pushes against the miraculous thighs of the Mauler to no effect, her world in darkness with the up close and personal butt smother.
Topside, a beaming Cassava points to Sanders.
“This is for you,” she shouts.
“Well, I hope it’s more for her,” Ky chuckles to herself, giving Cassava a thumbs up.
With Castle’s count starting to grow, Onika pulls forward a step to break the count, in so doing letting a greasy-faced Reiko gasp for breath. The respite is momentary as Cassava RAMS her monumental derriere into Reiko’s mug then proceeds to twerk a ten-count of pelvic thrusts that batter Ohno’s face, her head bopping back and forth with each impact.
With the crowd roaring at the end of a more accurate ten-count, the Booty Blaster bounces away, literally, from the ravaged Reiko, Ohno little more than a grease spot, semi-conscious from the sensual attack.
Cassava’s has much more to her mission to make it impossible for Kylie to ever want any other tag partner.
Plucking Ohno off the canvas with a grasp on a wrist, she flings the Invader toward the opposite buckles with an Irish Whip. The impact of Reiko’s spine to the buckles shakes the ring and sends the wincing warrior staggering out to Onika who waits center stage.
In a single fluid motion, Cassava catches Ohno under her arms and launches Reiko HIGH into the Orlando sky. She pivots with the Ninja at her zenith and sits out, apparently trying and half-succeeding in DRIVING the Invader THROUGH the mat, Ohno’s body bouncing off the canvas before settling into a coma between the extended stems of the Mauler.
Rydeen Bomb ( www.youtube.com/watch?v=SrrQQi7QCG8 )
Cassava gathers Reiko’s limp legs and leans forward for the pin and the win with the…
ONE…
TWO…
Kylie’s attempt to intercept an entering Seah is only partially positive as Sin manages to bring Sanders with her into a pile-up atop the legal women and break Castle’s count.
The newly minted team of Iowans is jumbled with the Asian invaders. A confused Cassava grabs whoever’s behind her and turns with a right fist ready for pounding when she sees the anxious hazel eyes and sweat-soaked elfin features of her dream girl staring back.
Palms raised, Sanders offers a worried ‘WHOA’, thankful that her Superfan is able to stop in time.
“Sorry Miss Sanders.”
“It’s Kylie, Cassava. Let’s just go with Kylie.”
The delight is obvious on Onika’s joyful features…until a risen Sin NAILS Cassava’s temple with a superkick that sends the Mauler flopping onto a shoulder and hip. The Platinum Pixie scrambles to her feet but has the poor fortune to turn into a reloaded second superkick from Seah that spins Sanders in a pirouette.
The lights are on but no one’s home for the still vertical Ky, which is fine by the Little Dragon as she collects the blonde and bullies her to one corner while a recovering Reiko peels Cassava off the deck and whips her to the opposite one. Ohno follows in with a splash of the BMD champ that leaves Onika pliant and ready for heaving.
“You two simpletons need to know each other better to be a top tag team,” Seah shouts, “and I know Fat Ass wants nothing more, so let’s see if we can make a love connection.”
The Invaders silently signal to each other and simultaneously toss Cassava and Kylie on their way, ebony and ivory racing toward each other where mid-ring there’s a meeting of the minds AND bodies. The partners CRASH into each other, the slighter Sanders taking the worst as she’s flattened by the curvy Cassava. The Mauler is sent in a stumbling u-turn from the collision but is quickly decked by a spinning heel kick from the Japanese invader.
Spinning Heel Kick ( www.youtube.com/watch?v=9TvvS_y4oos&t=20s ) :19
The FAWNatics are amidst loud uproar with the Invaders wresting control from their favorites in underhanded fashion while an equally unhappy Castle demands Seah leave the legal confines immediately.
“Let me help you first,” the Invader insists, sinking a set of nails into the silvery bob of the legendary Hawkeye.
Sin rips a bewildered Kylie to her feet and bum rushes the Pixie to the ropes, heaving her over the top, Sanders crashing off the apron and plopping to an ignominious pool on the arena floor.
Seah raises her hands plaintively to Nick.
“I’m next. Don’t worry.”
Sin slips through the cables and drops boot soles to floor then STOMPS them into a defenseless Sanders, Ky’s body bruised as she’s left a mudhole by the rampaging Korean grappler.
Inside, Reiko scoops Cassava off the canvas and sends her to the ropes. The curvy Superfan rebounds off the cables at full speed and a waiting Ohno’s able to pluck her foe off the deck then deftly maneuver Onika across her shoulders into a modified Torture Rack position. But the Mauler’s only there for a moment.
The Invader spins with her cargo, dizzying the Booty Blaster before dropping to her knees and delivering her Ninja Backbreaker.
Ninja Backbreaker ( www.youtube.com/watch?v=zevJ_fi8cFA ) :17
Reiko spins to find a tumbling Onika come to rest on her abundant chest. She hooks her hands around the far side of Cassava’s rack and hips and pulls Onika toward her, rolling the melted Milk Chocolate Mauler to her back. Reiko mounts tight with a crossbody pin, collecting the far leg for insurance, the Invasion securing a beachhead with the victory at…
ONE…
TWO…
Cassava rips her thicc leg free and squirms to her side. Reiko hisses in anger and pulls back harshly on Cassava’s hair “Agh!” and paddles the BMD champ’s buns like she’s being punished for misbehaving.
“Know when you're beaten!”
Cassava cries out as her follicles are nearly freed, but it’s the butt blistering by the kunoichi that makes her eyes well up and spurs the dyed blonde to get up.
Reiko keeps her controlling grip on the fur of Kylie’s guard dog and lashes at Onika’s bulbous buns with a steady stream of forehand/backhand as she rises, the smacking and clapping sound creating its own applause amongst the echoing boos.
Her spanking hand getting tired, Reiko works Onika’s multicoloured locks into a makeshift ponytail and guides the whimpering young lioness to turn into a knee to the solar plexus, hunching the defender over.
“How can you stand being so out of shape?” Reiko chides as she guides Onika’s head under her left armpit and her arms under the dusky beauty in a reverse Full Nelson.
“If my ass jiggled like purin in an earthquake I’d die of shame.”
The Yokohama Mama falls back to the canvas and hurls Cassava overhead, then flips over into a sitting straddle of her opponent. With one knee on the mat and her other leg lying across Cassava’s lap, Reiko’s biceps flex magnificently as she reefs on the Butterfly lock.
www.youtube.com/watch?v=RA0ynTsZrGw
Biting the inside of her lip to deny Ohno a cry, Cassava wags a finger from side to side, an answer to ref Nick’s queries.
Reiko bounces in The BMD’s lap while she vigorously pumps the hold, making Cass flap her arms like a baby bird.
“You can tap or you can suffer alongside your aging crush in the hospital.”
Cassava sees red at that slander of Kylie and breathes out through her nose like an angry bull.
Using that highly trained ass of hers, Cassava begins to inch her way to the ropes; alternatively tensing each maximized glute with each lurch to waddle her way to the cables. Reiko incredulously looks over her shoulder to see Cassava’s toes wiggling closer to the bottom strand. Reiko plants her feet and rises with the Sanders wannabe in the submission.
“My gawd! Do you have bowling balls for implants?” Reiko complains.
Cassava stomps a heel on the toe of Ohno’s boot making her yelp. “Watch your mouth, never-was!” Cassava barks, “Maybe if you had some curves, you’d be less of a bitter bYYYTCH!”
The second syllable of Onika’s insult stretches and rises like a roller coaster when Reiko swings her into a swift arc that smacks her back and ass against the firm ring floor. Reiko bridged in the aftermath of the Butterfly Suplex then floats over into another crossbody pin; again hooking the far leg for insurance. The Invader grinds her forearm against Cassava’s cheek in disrespect. The ref smacks the canvas once, twice, but before the final third Cassava breaks free with a kick out resulting in a firm smack to the back of the head.
Outside the ring, parallel to the legal competitors, Seah’s still taking Kylie to the woodshed.
Palming the sides of the Platinum Pixie’s skull, The Little Dragon leans Kylie back and rams her face against the apron. Kylie groans and grasps at the Invader’s wrists but Sin keeps the pressure on her noggin and leans her back for another thudding meeting with the thinly covered plywood. And then another, and another, and onto the fourth brain scrambling.
Sin presses Kylie’s face hard against the rough texture of the apron and walks up that side of the ring, grinding the shrieking Pixie’s features against the mat like she means to rub her nose off! Reaching the end of the line, Sin presses a hand between Kylie’s shoulders to keep her against the apron.
“Will you be leeching off Fat Ass as you’ve done to all your other partners your entire career?”
Seeing Reiko paddle Onika’s big behind inspires Seah to swat Sanders’ much smaller tush with a clapping shot. The blonde yelps indignantly and kicks her feet while Seah looks at Kylie’s buns in irritation.
“You don’t even take a spank properly, Miriam lied in her Christmas cards!”
Taking Kylie by the wrist with both hands, the former Devil Doll takes a big step and buggy whips the decorated former champion back down the aisle, but Kylie drops into a crouch and reverses the Whip!
Seah speeds out of control and crashes into the steel steps. KLACLANG!!
Her body flips and bounces off the metal corners in a chiropractic nightmare of an impact. Seah writhes on the padded arena floor mouth forming a silent scream as Kylie exhales wearily and tenderly checks if her nose is in one piece.
“How the hell do people still remember those cards, is she still sending them?”
Setting that mystery aside for another night, Kylie turns to check on her partner and sees Cassava trying to shake off aches and pains and get to all fours. She gives a sigh of relief that her bootyiful partner wasn’t pinned while she was occupied, but there’s something wrong with this picture.
“Wait… where’s Reiko?”
“Hiiiyah!!”
The Ninja is flying from the top of the corner post! Reiko descends like a bird of prey and nearly bifurcates the beleaguered blonde with a Diving Karate Chop to the top of her dome.
Church bells ring inside Kylie’s skull as her eyes cross with a moan. She sinks to her knees like a deflating balloon. Reiko kicks Kylie in the chest folding her flat, thighs atop calves and purposefully steps on the American floormat’s belly on her way to collect Seah.
“Right where you belong, underfoot.”
The spokeswoman for the Asian Invasion hurriedly but gently guides Seah up and speedwalks her to their corner.
“Let’s capitalize while they’re still in pieces.”
Still feeling pangs from her collision with the steel steps, Sin grimaces as she nods and climbs back onto the apron, grabbing the tag rope as Reiko steps back through the ropes into the squared circle.
Ohno spreads her arms wide and flips off the booing arena attendees with a double bird as she strides over to Onika, who’s got her knees under her but hasn’t the strength to push off the mat, only managing to raise her plush patootie into the air.
Too irresistible a target to ignore, Reiko raises her arms into the air and turns those middle fingers into flat hands. She swings them down and ripples Onika’s cheek meat with a gaudy double spank.
“It is a bit addictive,“ Ohno remarks to Sin, walking around to The Superfan’s hair and pulling a whinging Cassava to her feet.
“After we beat them let’s tie this one to the guardrail, let everyone get a turUUURCK!!”
Cassava stops playing possum and strikes like a cobra; daggering her hand into Reiko’s open mouth and digging her fingers into a bundle of nerves under The Ninja’s tongue.
Mandible Claw (https://youtu.be/tBXjaz2iAAs?t=1240)
Cassava smiles spitefully at the fear in Reiko's eyes and the desperate gurgling sounds leaking from her mouth.
“If you were learning from Miss Sanders instead of trying to take her down, you might have won this match by now.”
Seah slaps the top buckle in frustration and swears in her native tongue. Powering through a possible concussion, Kylie trudges to the Western hemisphere corner with the help of the apron and uses the ropes to get to her feet. The sight of Cassava regaining control of the match helps clear most of the swirling spots from her vision. She claps in support and calls out, “We’re almost there! You can do it, Cass!”
Cassava whips her head around to the sound of her idol’s voice and gives her a confident nod before whipping back to Reiko, drawing the heel by the jaw closer to her face and whispering in glee, “I’m back on a nickname basis!”
Reiko raises an eyebrow and gurgles in confusion, bewildered at Cassava speaking to her like a school friend while slowly draining her consciousness with the strange agony. Ohno’s eyes begin to glaze over and she slowly drops to a kneel; she slaps and grabs at Cassava’s body looking for a handhold to stay up, but only manages to give the Mauler’s tits a groping squeeze before her hands trail onto her hips.
Wanting some payback for all the rudeness toward her icon of a tag partner, Cassava asks “Was all this foul behaviour just an excuse to feel me up?”
Cassava forces Reiko to shake her head in agreement; the fast motion makes lightning travel down her chin and robs her arms of life, they drop listlessly to the canvas as Reiko bleats.
“Well I’m flattered, but that’s no excuse to insult the greatest woman in wrestling-no, WORLD history! After we pin your asses you better apologiiIEE!”
Cassava’s voice raises two octaves when Reiko slaps her between the legs in a desperate move. The booty battler seizes and her knees quake, but she maintains the Claw, albeit slightly weaker.
Whap! Reiko slaps even harder on Main Street, the chance for freedom giving the Invader a second wind. Nick Castle waves a warning finger at Reiko.
“Stay out of her trunks, this isn’t a penthouse match!”
Cassava forces down a scream, wanting to be as composed as a diplomat in front of Kylie Sanders, but that display is somewhat ruined by her doubling over with intense trembling, causing all manner of movement in her moneymaker.
Both mesmerizing and terrifying Kylie with flashbacks to her early days against Lakeisha Bates. The veteran shakes off her PTSD via Rumpshaking and tries to support her young partner, “Just hold on a little longer, Cass! She’s almost out!”
With the angelic voice of the greatest Sanders in her ears, Cassava rallies and works the Claw like she trying to tear through Reiko’s soft underside. Tears run down Reiko’s cheeks and she lets out a bubbling moan, WHAP! and thumps her bicep against Cassava’s kitty!
Shooting off the mat microseconds after contact, Reiko disguises the low blow as a bodyslam stall, lifting Onika into the air and upside down, the junior Iowan’s fingers slipping from her mouth giving Reiko sweet relief. Her mouth’s thrumming with too much of an aftershock, so The Ninja just roars wordlessly as she breaks into a sprint with The BMD in hand. Slamming Onika into the canvas with a Running Bodyslam with rope-shaking strength!
Ohno’s body slaps onto Cassava’s in the followthrough of the move, beating a sigh out of The BMD that would have been a scream 30 seconds before. Ohno slithers onto Onika's wheezing body into a full body pin; she presses Cassava's wrists against the mat and hooks her ankles around the thicc contender's naked pair, spreading her legs wide in a Grapevine split.
ONE!
TWO!!
THR-
Cassava pops a shoulder up in time, saving the match and bullying Reiko's breast with her larger one. Reiko gives a harsh exhale in annoyance and pushes Cassava flat.
"This has become tedious."
She turns Cassava’s cheek with a bitchy slap and uses The Superfan’s tits as stress balls with a white-knuckled grip. Ignoring Onika’s writhing and whining, Reiko speaks over her shoulder to Seah.
“We keep her here and ring her out.”
Seah points her chin at Kylie across the ring
"We'll finish the job on the cream puff after the match."
Kylie didn't catch what they were saying but understood the intent. She beats a palm against her chest
"Why don’t you try something when I’m in the ring!? Or you afraid I’ll beat you again!?”
At the reminder of that once-in-a-lifetime fluke incident, Seah stares daggers at Kylie and draws her thumb across her throat,
“I’ll send you to the farm where they send aging pets and wrestlers before Youtube.”
Having grown tired of kneading Onika’s breasts like bread dough, Reiko pushes off the content creator and tags in her sister Invader. Seah vaults onto the top buckle in a crouch and shoots into the air like a Jill in the Box. With as much grace and power as the patriarch of masculine insanity, Sin twists in the air and lands an Elbow Drop across Onika’s hills. Cassava sits up with a jolt, cradling her second-best feature and gets shoved back down against the mat by Sin who climbs aboard in a seat on The Superfan’s bruised breasts.
ONE!
Cassava bucks Seah off into a kneel immediately then bleats when Sin punches her square in the face. Nick Castle issues a warning as she gets up to tag in Reiko.
“Watch the closed hands, Sin!”
He gets a noncommittal grunt from the Korean Killer as she leaves while Reiko mirrors Seah’s earlier vault, but faces away from the ring. Reiko throws herself backward in a spectacular Moonsault that ends with the wet smack! that accompanies a tummy-on-tummy impact. Cassava’s limbs spring into the air and flop back down lifeless. Reiko stays lying across the shuddering stalker, making a human plus sign as a cover.
ONE!
TWO!!
THRE-CASSAVA KICKS OUT!!!
The BMD exemplifies the kind of heart and grit that her partner and heroine, Kylie Sanders showed and inspired Cassava with her whole career. Reiko leans back onto her haunches and huffs angrily as Cassava rolls onto her elbows. She slaps Onika’s destructive buns as she rises.
“You’re like a sleeping bag filled with pudding.”
She tags Seah back into the match.
Kylie tries to pump up her partner by getting the FAWNatics to chant and clap.
“Come on, baby you can do this! Just make it over here! Ca-Ssa-Va! Ca-Ssa-Va!...”
The Corps starts to rally around their second in command by the will of their leader and a shiver runs through Cassava’s body. Her heart’s desire is cheering for her, and called Cassava baby... a flood of adrenaline and endorphins being to cascade down the Superfan’s person, numbing her pains and filling her with the energy to get to her feet.
Seah backs into the ropes and recoils into a run to the chocolate-dipped Kylie-copy.
“Stay down or get out down!”
Seah leaps and spins into a high Roundhouse Kick that would have sent Cassava’s coconut into the third row if she hadn’t dashed forward and caught Seah around the waist and thigh. The surprise of being caught stalls the Little Dragon’s long enough for Cassava to rise to the tiptoes of her powerful legs and misalign Seah’s spine with a sudden Powerbomb!
youtu.be/7R8lwpPDDAw?t=156
The reinvigorated Onika keeps her handholds and digs her fingers into Seah’s flesh, stacking the opposing martial artist on her shoulders for a flash pin.
Castle is on the canvas in a heartbeat and slaps the pine for a count of two before Seah violently twists out of The BMD’s grasp onto all fours.
“You lucky girl,” Seah rasps as she rushes to stand, “that one wrestling class paid offugh!”
Cassava snatches her by the ears and pulls her into a Kneelift to the gut, then takes her off her feet with a Hiptoss that bounces Seah’s lower back off the ring floor. Cassava pulls the cringing wyrm off the canvas with a fistful of hair.
“You don’t know it yet, but you’re in the middle of a Sanders-run.”
Confused, Sin almost asks if Cassava means she’s about to tag Kylie in or reveal some kind of familial relation when the Milk Chocolate Mauler takes a big step back, drops her shapely hips and launches Sin to the corner parallel to Kylie with an Irish Whip. Seah manages to turn in time but judging by the THUD-D-D of the vibrating corner it is of little benefit. The power turns off in Seah’s legs and she slides to a painful seat against the buckles groaning at the pain and the future bill from her chiropractor.
Onika speeds to the far corner from her prey. Gripping the top rope, she places a foot on the middle buckle and lightly paddles the raised glute to get the flesh enticingly wobbling. She calls out to the crowd (but mostly to Kylie)
“Here comes the BOOM, baby!”
She rockets across the ring. Seah sees a bad future coming and wills herself to move to safety but will alone isn’t enough. Onika’s proud ass hits the Korean woman’s face like a baseball bat in the hands of a Major Leaguer!
www.youtube.com/watch?v=f_opCfcf_g0
The Orlando audience has been booing The Asian Invasion all night but they collectively“OOOHH!!” in sympathy watching Seah’s head whiplash over the bottom turnbuckle.
Reiko bites her lower lip nervously and fiddles with the tag rope in her fist. Even Kylie winces at the destructive power in her partner’s buns.
I don’t want to be on the other end of that wrecking ball, is the glaring thought in the blonde’s mind as she watches Cassava scoop Seah up, turn her away and chest her into the corner. Flashing a quick smile at Kylie, Cassava snares her arms around Seah’s tummy and forces the two of them into a backroll. As Cassava spins back onto her feet she pops off the canvas to her full height, using the momentum to throw Seah back and plant her shoulders on the mat, bridging to keep the villain upended, the Rolling German Suplex a clear callback to Kylie’s early years.
OVER AND DONE
www.youtube.com/watch?v=zIKlY8V9SUc
ONE!
TWO!!
THRE-
Reiko sprints into the ring and soccer kicks Onika in the side, knocking the two over. Sin puddles on the mat rocked by the cannonade of Cassava offence, as Reiko puts the boots to the booty battler for staying their win for another minute.
“You! Are! Trash!” Reiko punctuates each word with a stomp, “You! Will! Not! StoaGH!”
Kylie comes flying to her partner’s rescue with a Double Axe-handle from the top rope bringing her joined fists down on the top of Ohno’s skull.
“Don’t mess with Plesant Valley!”
Grabbing Reiko’s wrist as she staggers back, Kylie buggywhips the Japanese heel to the ropes and speeds after her. Reiko’s two steps off the rebound of the cables before Sanders’ shoulder hits her gut with a Spear that could put the lightweight in the XFL; Kylie sacks her foe like lunch and leaves her gasping on the mat. After rising to a knee, Ky cranes her neck and sees Cassava and Seah crawling to their respective corners with her Number One Fan much farther ahead.
“Be right there!”
Kylie bounds across the ring ahead of Cassava and slips into position behind the ropes just as her partner is within tagging distance. Kylie extends her palm and Cassava reaches up and happily smacks it with hers, bringing the veteran back into battle.
“I made good on setting them up at least,” Cassava japes with a flinch as she rolls onto the apron, the fading of the adrenaline allowing ignored soreness to reclaim her bruised but beautiful body.
Kylie pats her on the navel before she chases after The Invasion, making Cassava stifle a gasp “I like knocking them down anyway.”
Sin is mere feet from her home corner, though it is empty with Reiko still struggling to breathe on the canvas. Not that it would have mattered. Coming up on her six, Kylie leapfrogs into a double foot stomp on Sin’s back pinning her like a fly to the canvas. Kylie hops off her unwilling cushion and drags the squirming Dragon along the rough surface, closer to the American side of the ring.
“You’ve been such a pain in our asses I’m bringing out something special, no take-backs.”
Seah finds herself pulled to verticality by her one-piece and tucked into a Front Facelock. She beats punches against the false idol’s hip in a bid for freedom, but the bootying Seah suffered has taken the starch out of her blows.
Kylie places one of Seah’s arms over her neck and works her fingers under the hemline of a leghole for an extra secure grip on her quarry.
“With a strained “Up!” leaving her lips, Kylie points the Little Dragon’s boots into the air, the two forming a human pillar. Onika’s heart flutters thinking it’s going to be a Brainbuster tribute to The Superfan’s other great love and the third in their yet-to-be-made (or mentioned) relationship, Emily West. It is not. It is however a callback to Kylie’s meaner but victorious days; The Pleasant Valley Princess holds Seah steady for three seconds then suddenly genuflects, bringing Seah’s neck with all her weight behind it onto Kylie’s bended knee!
Pleasant Dreams: www.youtube.com/watch?v=onLxf9TCQ8A
The Senseless Sin falls onto her rear after her disastrous impact with her chin to her chest, then droops to the ring floor on her side and cheek. Kylie leans over to pull her into a pin when thudding footsteps divert her attention to her blindside; Reiko’s up, running and roaring with a knee aiming toward the lone white woman’s temple.
THUMP!
Ohno gets intercepted by a Flying Crossbody from Cassava!
Spying on The Ninja from afar, Cassava copied her idol’s save from a minute before and jumped from the top of her corner to squash the interfering Invader. The BMD bounces off Reiko onto her feet like the heel was a trampoline and shares a look with Kylie.
A moment of wordless communication occurs and the two Iowans break out in wild smiles.
Somehow the crowd knows what’s coming and they’re already on their feet! Moving in perfect unison, the leaders of the Kylie Corps pull the Asian Invasion up by their silky hair and lift them into dueling Fireman’s Carries.
“Pleasant!” Kylie screams out as she lowers into a deep crouch.
“Valley!” Cassava hollers, mirroring her spiritual center and sinking her haunches closer to the ground.
“DRIVER!!” The Corps shakes the very foundation of the arena with their cry as Sanders and Onika hit simultaneous PVDs.
www.youtube.com/watch?v=sFD5dEtKJqY
The Asian Invasion display their years of finely crafted teamwork by collapsing into matching starfishes on the mat after the ring finishes shaking after that detour to Pleasant Valley.
While not official, Cassava swings a leg over and feeds Reiko some Cake with a Reverse Facesit while flattening the Invader’s bust with her palms. In a bit of mischief and solidarity, Kylie performs a rare Facesit and feeds the slumbering Seah some Vanilla flavoured Cake.
Castle lowers for the count as Cassava beams and gives Kylie a double thumbs up, while still pressing down Reiko’s breasts of course. “Amazing!”
ONE!
TWO!!
THREE!!!
DINGDINGDING!!
At the victory bell’s first chime, Cassava lunges from her perch on Ohno’s nose and nearly bowls Kylie over with a tackle of a hug. Nearly. Cassava makes sure to pull Miss Sanders back into position on Seah’s face, involuntarily guiding her on a grind that puts the platinum blond on the road to going ‘Old School’.
Trying not to blush, Kylie pats Cassava on the head and tries to coax her to let go before she breaks something with this Bearhug.
“Great win, Cass. We did it!”
Cassava squeezes even tighter much to her partner’s chagrin.
“Hell yeah, we did! All thanks to you!”
Kylie accepts a lifeline from Nick who pulls them to their feet and gets between the Pleasant Valley powerhouses to raise their hands in victory. So excited that she’s sharing a win with The Icon, Kylie Sanders, Onika breaks from the official and scampers up the buckles of a corner.
“Woooo!!”
The Superfan has her clenched hands in the air and screaming like she just won Mania’s main event.
Kylie raises her eyebrows and gives a surprised laugh.
“Damn, maybe I should keep her around and make every fight a title match.”
Caught up by her partner’s energy, Kylie runs up a set of buckles and gives a “Wooo!” to her Corps as well.
The Asian invasion slinks off quietly as Kylie and Cassava celebrate, in no shape or mood to get their revenge. But tomorrow’s another day…
Sanders recoils lightly off the cables and hops back in the ring. She wipes some sweat from her forehead with the back of her hand and sees Cassava has left the ring to grab something by the commentator’s table. As she slides into the ring, Kylie sees it’s a microphone in Cassava’s hands.
“Miss Sanders, Kylie! Sorry.”
The BMD has the beginnings of tears in her eyes from happiness. One hand holds the mic to her lips while the other gestures wildly, “Teaming with you has been a dream come true.”
Shocked murmurs stir in the crowd as Cassava lowers to one knee, “and I’m hoping you’ll agree to make another dream of mine real…..”
A cold sweat starts to run down Kylie’s back. Oh God, she isn’t about to propose, is she?
“Will you have a match with me? Against me? Cassava Onika vs The Kylie Sanders!”
“Well damn. I’ve got a sweet tooth, but I don’t know if I can handle that much cake.”
Ky turns to her Corps, toothy grin emerging.
“Whaddya all think?”
Overcome with the idea of the Platinum Pixie sharing the ring with her Superfan and seeing if the idol or the obsessive devotee comes out on top, they soon begin chanting “YES…YES…YES!”
The mantra quickly reaches ear-splitting levels and Sanders turns back to Cassava. She motions for her fan to rise and offers her hand in a shake.
“I guess you got yourself a match.”
A giddy Cassava grabs the proffered mitt and tugs Kylie into a bearhug.
“Thank you…thank you…thank you…you don’t know how happy…”
Kylie gurgles out a playful “I think I do” between gasping breaths. “Please…down.”
“Oh…sorry…Miss…Kylie.”
Recovering her oxygen, Sanders holds up a palm.
“It’s OK. I’m happy to make dreams come true and you’ve earned this one.”
Cassava swoons but catches herself before completely melting to the canvas.
“But don’t think beating me is going to be easy,” Kylie adds. I’ve still got some fight left in me.”
“No…no,” the Milk Chocolate Mauler insists. “I know this will be the favorite match of my life, but just as much I know it will be the toughest.”
Ky nods and grabs Cassava’s near wrist, raising it high as she turns to the hard cam.
“Then it’s a date,” Kylie pronounces.
Those words turn Cassava’s legs to jelly. Sanders catches her partner before Onika slips to her knees. A beaming Pixie helps the BMD back to full vertical and a final shoulder to shoulder embrace by the Iowans leads to a promo for tonight’s title matches.