Post by hawkeye on Mar 10, 2023 1:02:41 GMT
KICKPUNCH- ADAM WARROCK
www.youtube.com/watch?v=TXma0EkrrYQ
A short but curvaceous Black woman steps through the curtain, raising a fist to the cries of the crowd. A softly smiling Cassava Onika claps a few times before putting her hands on her hips, the normally high-energy, eternally positive New Media Mistress seems muted tonight. The forced retirement of Emily West, her secondary idol and future co-wife with future wife Kylie Sanders (Emily is unaware of this intention and has never met Cassava, Kylie is also unaware of these intentions) has her feeling down, despite the actual events happening some time ago. The lifelong Youtuber was working on a retrospective of The Academic’s excellent career when reality insisted itself yet again and made Cassava sad. She has to power through this dark mood, or she’ll be a half-step behind her opponent the whole night.
Cassava slaps her cheeks and starts hopping from foot to foot, muttering to herself, ”Head in the game… we can be down later. Let’s do this!”
The host of FAWN Finds is dressed for battle in a white tank top that shows a hint of her belly button, a red bra is visible through the thin fabric that's barely keeping her F Cup breasts from flashing the fans as she bounces to and fro. On her wide hips is a pair of pink booty shorts that seemed painted on (and a size too small), and just above those was a wide leather strap of the BMD title. The nature and design of the belt dictated that the gold plate be showcased just above its holder’s buns. The inward curve of the center gold plate resting on Onika’s shelf of ass like it was always meant to be there. She chooses to wrestle in bare feet like her hero Kylie Sanders once did, that worship clearly bleeding into her wardrobe and choice of hair dye (blonde with pink highlights).
At the top of the ramp, Cassava swings her hips into a turn that puts her back to the audience, presenting an ass that makes LaKeisha Bates self-conscious whether she admits it or not. She gives it a crowd-pleasing shimmy before making her way down to the ring, slapping hands that reach for her as she goes.
“FROM PLEASANT VALLEY, IOWA… SHE STANDS FIVE FEET, TWO INCHES TALL, AND WEIGHS IN TONIGHT AT ONE HUNDRED TWENTY-FIVE POUNDS… SHE IS THE WOMAN OF 1,000 HIP ATTACKS AND THE FIRST, CURRENT, AND ONLY BUNS OF MASS DESTRUCTION CHAMPION...THIS IS CASSAVA ONIKA!!”
CASSAVA ONIKA
Nearly completing her circuit of fan greets, Cassava looks in the ring and nods at FAWN’s newest and buffest referee Reginald, who is just poured in those black and white stripes (Commissioner Bethany Christian insisted on taking the measurements herself and supervised the fitting).
REGINALD WORTHINGTON THE THIRD
A small grin spreads across the young grappler’s face. Before heading to her corner, she passes by the announcer, cups his ear and whispers something. He chortles and brings the microphone to his lips.
“OFFICIATING THE MATCH WILL BE ‘PRESIDENT PECS AND THE ARCHDUKE OF ABS’ REGINALD WORTHINGTON THE THIRD!!!”
Reggie lets out a small laugh as he gets a small pop from the crowd and playfully curls a bicep, causing men in the audience to wince from the high-pitched squealing from the female fans. Giggling, Cassava rolls into the ring and goes to her corner for a pat-down. Reggie lightly touches her shoulders and wrists, inspecting for foreign objects while they wait for her opponent to make her entrance.
A catchy guitar riff blasts through the speakers, and someone cuts the power to the lights. The crowd comes alive as spotlights glare and target the entrance at the top of the ramp.
www.youtube.com/watch?v=lubaolhjzig
The charismatic wrestler and former mascot of her family’s company, Debra Sugerman, playfully marches out of the curtain, twirling her literal candy cane. The lightweight masterfully leads the masses in a wave of cheers travelling from one side of the building to the other, each one of the thousands-strong crowd following the arc of her baton like a symphony obeying its maestro.
“Weighing in at 121lbs, standing 5 feet and 5 inches, and hails from Valdosta, Georgia, by way of Stone Mountain. The face of Sugerman Confectionary, and it’s the Sweetest you’ll ever see! Debra ‘Little Debbieee’ Suugerrrmaaan!!!”
DEBRA SUGERMAN
Step inside, walk this way
You and me, babe
Hey, hey
The people are singing along to Ninja Sex Party’s cover within the first beats of the song, bobbing and swaying while they take in the bright-eyed and bushy-tailed newcomer. Fans of beach fighting and FAWN’s newest Indie partner, LAW (Ladies of Adventurous Wrestling), know the young rookie will put on a show the moment she's in the public eye. From head to ankle, Debra’s gear is a swirling rainbow of sequins glittering under the harsh lights of FAWN, and if you look close enough, each bead resembles a wrapped hard candy. The radiant sweets travelled up each arm from the wrist into the turtle neck of a VERY cropped top, the hemline serving as the bottom of the cups for her pert chest, with a wide triangle panel cut out to show off the sweets. After miles of bare, lightly toned belly is a pair of tight pants that clung to her legs like a candy coating; patches of material are cut out from the side of each leg, so Debra’s pale skin pushes through the opening. Hence, SUGERMAN blazed no matter what angle you saw the Countess of Candyland.
Debra twirls her 4-foot cane in front of her through two arcs before pointing it straight to the sky. The apparent signal turns the house lights back on. The walking instrument resembled a candy cane with a green gumdrop bottom that consisted of rubber with a glitter dusting. Instead of a hook or knob, the baton exploded at its top with a bouquet of round lollipops. Shaking her hips to the beat and singing of the crowd, Debra plucks a pomegranate-flavoured sucker out of the arrangement and gives it a quick tongue lashing. Pointing the now glistening candy at the camera zooming in, Sugerman chirps in a southern accent, “Y’all ready to see me beat this gal into frosting? If you’re good, I’ll let you lick the spoon!"
She places the confection back between her smiling lips before setting off on a hip-swivelling march around the ring. The candy heiress’s wavy blonde hair tickles the nape of her neck with each timed step; Debra encourages the masses to continue their serenade by swinging and pointing the cane to guide the fans’ voices, playing choirmaster to the largest choir in the world.
Take a bottle!
Shake it up!
Break the bubble!
Break it up!
As the crowd is about to launch into the chorus, Debra sprints up the ring steps, her candy-apple red running shoes reflecting the light. Debra spins against the ropes along the apron, not stopping till she’s dead center in the Hard cam’s sight; Debra tucks in her arms, holding the cane horizontally and crouches low into a tight ball. Tensing like a coiled spring, Sugerman hears the chorus start and bursts into the air! Spreading her limbs out and straight, she lands on the apron in a wide stance like a jubilant star. Packets of sugar drop from the ceiling and scatter onto the audience as the FAWNatics loudly sing.
Pour some sugar on me!!
The music dies down, but Little Debbie doesn't enter the ring. She turns the sucker in her mouth between thumb and forefinger as she eyes the front row, searching for the biggest hunk in- There he is! “If I take you home to mama, she might try to take ya for herself!”
Spotting a short king in a Cassava Onika/FAWN Finds t-shirt, the flaxen-haired rookie with flair saunters over, swaying her just recently used lollipop high in the air, making the hawt ticket buyer wobble his head in synchronicity. His jaws are wide open to accept the plane coming in for a landing, but you can still tell he’s smiling from his bright eyes and the raised corners of his mouth, the crowd playing up the scene, echoing in unison, “ooooooooOOOHHHH…” as the candy draws near, then “YARRHHHH!!” Erupting in cheers when he gleefully takes the lollipop in his teeth, a few fans are a little disgusted with the indirect spit swap, but given the nature of FAWN, you’d think they’d be okay with FAR worse, don’t you think?
The combative cuties head towards each other, Sugerman with a sassy sway in her step. Cassava intimates a handshake that the natural blonde takes with no hesitation. "Pleasure to officially meet you. How about we burn this place down?"
"The pleasure's mine, sweetheart," Debra's voice is as saccharin as possible, Cassava tries to take it at face value, but it puts her on edge. Cassava was in TV Champion Crystal Hilton’s corner months ago when she beat Sugerman, but the match was fought clean, so hopefully, there’s no grudge under the surface. "Been looking to meet up with you for a while; you've made many friends in LAW. They told me all about you during my schoolin'.
"All good I hope," Cassava backs away and settles into a wrestler's crouch, Debra mirrors her stance and starts to circle on the balls of her feet.
Debra grins with a quick nod, "Oh, yes!" The two come together in an Elbow and Collar like they're magnetically charged, "You're quite popular in Phoenix still. Been making them proud, seeing a trainee of theirs grab the spotlight. But I guess you online celebrity types gotta think on your feet to stay relevant."
Cassava quirks an eyebrow at the inadvertent(?) insult and pivots in her bare feet, slipping out of the grapple with Debra's wrist in hand. She
pirouettes under the limb to twist it in an Arm Wringer. "You're talking about my show, FAWN Finds? Yeah, you gotta keep it fresh to stay relevant, same with anyone in the entertainment biz." The BMD twists Debra's arm again, pausing to jar the blonde's elbow against her shoulder before completing the painful rotation.
Sugerman bites the inside of her cheek and slaps at her shoulder to disperse the pain; Onika applies more pressure as she raises the arm making Debra double over, "You must get that. You were the Sugerman mascot, right? Before they got Sally the Sugarglider?"
Debra feels a flash of lightning-intense hate for that damn cartoon tramp and for Cassava for bringing that disgrace up, “I’m always fresh, Sugar buns. That was just an opportunity for bigger venues.” The Georgian starts stomping a sneaker, probing for The Superfan’s toes, but Cassava keeps her piggies safe and away from Debra’s heel. The dyed blonde pulls the pilfered arm across her body and raises her left knee; she bends Sugerman’s arm around her thigh and keeps it in place with her calf. Cassava leans a right arm around Sugerman’s waist and presses down on the back of her head as she throws themselves to the mat, upending the former mascot onto her shoulders and leaving Debra's patootie in the air and squirming during Worthington’s count.
youtu.be/1fW4Qpz148c?t=104
ONE!
TWO!!
Debra nearly kicks herself into a headstand to escape and falls onto her side. She rushes to her feet simultaneously as Onika darts to her side for a Hip Toss. Debra tenses and tries to take Onika off her feet, but the Booty Battler bears down and uses her lower center of gravity to halt the move in its tracks. Cassava reverses the toss and flips Debra to the mat. The former mascot speedily gets up with a grimace and reaches for Onika but gets her wrist grabbed instead. The Superfan pulls Sugerman into a Kneelift to the gut that doubles the natural blonde over; Cassava straddles the arm and turns into Sugerman, bending the limb into a Hammerlock, then raises her left leg against the blonde’s belly and places her ankle on Debra’s hip.
“Been training with La Sombra, lately,” Cassava chirps as drops backward to the canvas sending Sugerman tumbling overhead, “I think it’s going well.”
Sugerman grunts angrily as she hits the ring floor and quickly rolls to her feet; she pushes to standing just in time for Cassava’s bare soles to smack into her face and knock her flat with a Dropkick. Cassava pounces on Debra with a snug Lateral cover, pulling in the far leg and pressing her far larger tits into Debra’s more modest pair.
ONE!
TWO!
Debra kicks out and immediately scampers from under Onika to the safety of the bottom rope, grabbing it with both hands and crossing her ankles around it to guarantee the official’s protection. Referee Reginald shifts between the two asking Cassava to give some space, and the Iowan concedes without argument. She gets up and backs away to impressed applause from the FAWNatics; Orlando likes the show of technique from the young lioness. Maybe Cassava should fight when she’s sad more often?
Debra gets up with as much dignity as possible, making a show of adjusting her ring togs, and fluffing up her hair, "La Sombra's from that group of weird Canadians, right? They're good, you gals should collab on something." She approaches with arms open for a grapple that Cassava eagerly accepts. Their foreheads and middles rub and slide off each other as the women struggle for dominance. The Countess feels a stab of indignation and bubbling anger toward her LAW school sempai as Cassava's juggs dominate and flatten the Georgian's more modest Mounds. Debra puts some muscle into a swing that sets Cassava off balance; The Candy Countess loops around The Superfan and takes her in a Hammerlock. "Like a Twitch stream or Reaction video, that's what YouTubers do for money, right? It's like playing bucket drums for coins, just online, now that I think about it."
Cassava stifles a growl and winces as Sugarman tries to pop her shoulder out. The Superfan throws an elbow back to check the uppity Southerner in the mouth, but Sugarman catches it and now has Cassava stuck in dual Hammerlocks. Debra cranks on the twin holds, making Cassava arch her back in pain and thrust out her shoulder boulders to an appreciative audience. Debra keeps her homestyle brand of smack talk going.
"Don't get ornery now. It takes a lot of talent to be a successful street walker- oops," Onika growls as Debra catches herself in a faux faux pas, "I mean content creator."
With Onika's arms painfully trapped, Sugarman easily trots the Online Sensation to the side of the ring where the Hard Cam records. Sugarman forces Onika's front against the ropes, using the top strand to bisect The BMD's juggs before they roll over and rest on top of it. The FAWNatics get a lovely shot of Cassava's calcium cannons lightly bouncing on the rope. Debra keeps a fuming Onika in place till the ref counts “Four!” and then breaks away with a showy flourish, spinning away with a pirouette and curtsying to Cassava at center ring. The former mascot was facing her back, but Cassava could see her smug face in the FAWNtron.
Turning to face the Southern tart, Cassava looks at Sugarman disapprovingly, "I'm beginning to think we're not gonna get along, Debra."
"Oh, we're gonna get along just fine," Debra waves that notion off with her trademark smile that's beginning to piss Cassava off. The Superfan approaches, cracking her knuckles while The Countess preens like she performed a chore that got her clothes dirty.
"Right now, we're just establishing the top brand. Separating the Oreos from the Hydrox."
"Bitch, you did not just call me an Oreo!" Cassava barks angrily as she stomps into Debra, breathing fire and ready to trounce the lighter Lightweight. Despite her demure smile, Debra is just as eager to butt heads with the booty battler, quite literally. The blonde stoops to grind her forehead against the shorter Cassava, her never ceasing advert smile not shifting a millimetre, further infuriating The Superfan. Their tête-à-tête devolves into a shoving match, then shrieks and shouts as they escalate into hair-pulling. The two circle and sway in a hateful dance as they wrench each other’s heads in all directions and tug and tear at each other's locks. The Florida audience is hootin’ and hollerin’ at this catfighting scene, but Worthington has to ruin the moment and restore order. The buff and British ref politely looms over the snarling wrestlers, “Ladies, I must insist you separate and restart the match, please. This isn’t a Penthouse fight.”
Hissing at the try-hard Confederate tugging at her two-tone follicles, Cassava risked a glance at the burly official, "I think we're gonna need a count, Reggie. OW! Bitch!" A sharp pull on her hair urges Cassava to respond in kind, Debra makes a noise akin to a tea kettle, and she drags her nails across the wannabe celeb's scalp. "Yes, sugar please do. I'd love for a strong gentleman to keep some order around-AAie! Slattern!"
Reginald shakes his head, this is why he usually dates men. The Alpha Zebra does his duty, "One! Two! Three!..."
Third time's the charm; the wrestlers separate and back away, but their eyes never deviate and remain locked in a stare-down as they circle the black and white pillar of a referee before expanding to the perimeter of the Squared Circle. They close in on each other slowly before darting toward each other with violent intentions.
The dangerous Debra flattens a palm and angles her arm across her chest, firing a Knife-edge Chop when the content creator comes close. Cassava takes it on a boxer's guard and shrugs off the sting to show Debra how to REALLY chop a chest. The Superfan strikes true and puts a red welt on Sugarman's vanilla cupcakes with a loud crack!
Debra squeaks like a stepped-on mouse and puts a gentle hand on her chastised lovelies. Her expression twists in fury and lunges at Cassava just to get another Knife-edge across the swell of her breasts. While Debra flinches and cries out, Cassava loads another Bloodwind blast and hits the sugar mama with a third chop, and then a fourth, a fifth, and a sixth! Debra’s painfully backed into a corner; Cassava quickly moves her opponent’s arms behind the top ropes, and instead of continuing the Chopfest, turns away while taking the middle ropes in hand.
"You seemed fine showing off my bodacious bounty, can't take it when your good and not-so plenties are in the spotlight? That’s alright. I’ll switch it up."
Onika thrusts out her body with her pelvis leading the way and throws herself back against the natural blonde, cudgelling Debra's stomach with her vaunted Buns of Mass Destruction. Onika feels a wheezing burst of air from Debra’s lips tickle the base of her neck and repeats the butt beating with a smile. The Superfan gets another four shots in before the referee’s count forces her to disengage; Sugerman holds her stomach and sinks to a seat on the middle buckle while Cassava struts to center ring and gives the fans a quick bump and grind that that’s VERY appreciated, “That’s Hip attack 292 for those keeping track.”
Wanting to buy time to plan her next move, Debra stays in the safety of the corner for longer than allowed, playing up the pain in her guts with all the skills she learned in high school drama class to ward off the official. Holding abdomen and writhing, “Uhhh… check her shorts foreign objects she’s hiding weights!”
“Roll outside the ring and take a walk if you need time,” offers Cassava plainly, with hands on hips and a raised eyebrow, “Or, better yet, walk home if you're going to wrestle like this.”
Sugerman buries an urge to run over and rip out Cassava's hair by the roots. Instead, she straightens up with a composed air and walks to meet her with the same poise and grace she displayed during a press conference with the American Diabetes Society.
"Pardon me for needing a moment after taking that bag of Bowling balls you call an ass to the tummy. Are they filling implants with concrete nowadays? Didn't feel like silicone."
Cassava goes silent and her eyes widen as she processes that verbal slap in the face. She stares at Debra's smug face a moment before tilting her head back in realization. "Oooh, you're just a fake bitch, aren't you? Alright, I get it now."
The dyed blonde walks up to the natural blonde and pokes a finger over Debra's heart, "Maybe you're thinking because we both lost to my friend Crystal that we're on the same level. Trust me, we are not."
Debra scoffs, "of course not, your family'd have to move up a few tax brackets to be accepted into the buildings as mine."
Onika snarls and whips her hand forward to slap the vanilla off this bytch's face but whiffs over Sugerman's crown. The Caucasian wrestler suddenly shrinks several feet from Onika's perspective; in actuality, Sugerman dropped in a perfect split, a skill gained from years of cheerleading. Debra fires a jab into Cassava's belly button from the lower position doubling The Superfan over with a squawk, making her chin an easy target for the uppercut that takes Cassava off her feet. Debra rises after a successful Crackerjack combo and retreats for a speed boost from the ropes; Cassava sits up to see Debra darting forward and, on instinct, crosses her arms protectively over her face. The Countess delights her court with a cartwheel that rotates Debra to Cassava’s left, where she can boot the BMD in the jaw, bypassing the makeshift shield.
www.youtube.com/watch?v=JrxZkR5ytAQ
Cassava’s chin leads the way as she crumbles to the canvas on her side, absentmindedly moving her jaw to check for clicks. She may have gotten up on her own power, but Debra takes that future away by taking the hourglassed shaped hottie by the straps of her tanktop and bra and dragging Cassava to her limited verticality. Debra takes a big step back with one of Cassava’s wrists in hand and Whips her Irish style into the farthest set of buckles. The Superfan’s bare feet fly across the canvas at a good clip, but she turns in time to spare her jiggling front a painful stop to take less smarting bump with her back. Debra’s not too happy about Cassava’s cannon’s escaping their fate and sprints after the dyed blonde and throws herself into Spinning Leg Lariat that flattens Cassava’s mountains and puts a shiver in her frame.
www.youtube.com/watch?v=u_7AOFYmH7Y
Winded, Cassava sinks into a seat on the middle buckle with her red bra askew under her tank top, the left cup having travelled into her cleavage. Debra sees AC has the Iowan sporting glass cutters from the tent on her left hill and gleefully gives it a twist! Cassava loudly hisses, straightens with a jolt, and grabs Debra’s wrist, but the blonde uses the nub like a radio dial she hates, making Cassava yelp and stamp her feet.
“Looks like you need some ring-appropriate attire, sweetheart,” Debra advises, chock full of saccharin. She leads Cassava out of the corner by the titty, step by speedy step with hurtful tugs, “Is the price a barrier? Well, I can help you out. My purse strings aren’t so-” Smack! Smack!
Sugerman’s cheeks get paintbrushed with successive, rapid, Bytch slaps that swivel the heiress’s head back and forth. The catty attack frees Cassava’s teat from Debra’s pincer, and since she enjoyed it so much, Cassava does it again and really puts her hips into each swing.
SMACK! SMACK!
Debra teeters back with handprints on her face as red as her shoes. The sense seems to have been slapped out of her because when Cassava draws near, she resorts to some schoolyard slapping that Superfan brushes aside to grab a handful of Debra’s honey-hued locks and pull her into a Kneelift. The Countess doubles around the joint groan that turns into a whimper when Cassava applies a tight side Headlock that feels like it’ll pop Debra’s head off like the cork of a champagne bottle.
“I’m giving you one last chance, Sugerman.” Cassava brandishes an olive branch with firm authority as she lowers to a knee and tightens the lock. “This doesn’t have to become a thing. We can have a straight match, shake hands after and walk away.”
Sugerman surprises Onika and earns a spot in tomorrow’s highlight reel by nimbly kicking off the canvas and arcing her body to cartwheel out of the Headlock into the space in front of the BMD champion. Onika looks up, bewildered to see the sole of Sugerman’s sneaker coming at her at 88 miles an hour!
SUGERKICK!
youtu.be/YmQhiLpfYFM?t=1266
Cassava jerks her head back but the SuperKick glances off her chin, shaking her brain and leaving The BMD temporarily stunned on the canvas. Debra runs to the eastward ropes and springs into another cartwheel, this one of the hands-free variety, and Splashes onto Cassava like she was a crash pad.
www.youtube.com/watch?v=KpMy30sU1js
When 121lbs of bitch blonde drops onto her tummy, Cassava’s legs shoot up and Debra snags her right leg around the knee before it falls away, pulling in deep to secure her first and last cover of the match.
ONE!
TWONOO!!
Cassava rips her leg free and turns away from Debra onto her side, stopping the count. Debra’s lip curls in dissatisfaction, and she swats Cassava on the rump, “Don’t draw this out.” She drags Cassava up by the hair and the waistband, pulling up on the latter so a glute of destruction is bared by a half-wedgie. The Superfan loudly protests as the Southerner hikes up her shorts to a biting degree and walks her in a wide circle to show the Orlando audience that the top blonde is the natural blonde!
Done with their promenading, Debra angles Onika to the farthest corner, switches her grip from the booty battler’s shorts to her wrist, and then sends her flying to the corner with a deep Irish Whip. As Cassava runs(and bounces) to the buckles she catches the FAWNtronin the corner of an eye and sees Debra speeding after her; Cassava throws herself at the corner and seizes the top ropes and kicks up her naked feet at Debra’s face. The Countess manages to slip under the mule Dropkick and has to throw her hands up to avoid an ugly buckle-to-face collision as Cassava floats over Debra’s body to the canvas. Sugerman straightens just as a pair of strong, feminine arms cuddle her waist and lifts her up and carry Sugerman a couple of metres away from a rope break.
“Looks like you finally decided to wrestle!” Onika exclaims happily as she shows off the power in that shortstack frame of hers; Onika keeps her patois-speaking prey in the air so when she puts the squeeze on, Debra’s legs kick and flail in the air as she tries to break the Superfan’s grip. “If you focused more on grappling than your marketing, you’d see some success outside of the Jungle.”
Cassava lowers Debra to terra firma for a proper liftoff to a German Suplex but gets another showing of Debra’s cheerleading skills instead. Little Debbie hurls herself into a speedy somersault; Cassava finds herself faceplanting on the mat and her left leg painfully contorted in a Leglock! Debra cuts off circulation below the knee with a Scissors while trying to pop off Cassava’s foot with an Ankle Lock!
ROLLING LEGLOCK
www.youtube.com/watch?v=F-I0qyBViAk
Debra grins maliciously and moves Cassava's foot to an angle it was not designed to achieve. She taunts over the dyed blonde's resulting screams, "I got the multitasking skills to kick ass between the ropes and in front of the camera!”
A slight twist on her ankle and it's like acid running through Cassava's veins! The Superfan starts to look like her often abused idol, Kylie Sanders, suffering valiantly against a fate determined to see her fail. Cassava pulls at her hair to distract from Debra's manipulations of her ankle and whines a high-pitched whine choked down from a total scream. Forcing reason above the fog of agony, The Superfan stamps her palms on the coarse ring floor and hand-walks to the closet set of ropes; digging in her fingernails hard with each ‘step’ Cassava drags their combined in a laborious but speedy trek to safety. Debra doesn’t actively impede her beast of burden, but delights in working her hold to make the trip as excruciating as possible; tightening her thighs on Cassava’s leg with the intent to leave behind a stump and moving The BMD’s ankle like it’s a jigsaw puzzle.
Several yelps, curses and loud threats in rapid succession later, Onika has her coiled around the bottom rope, screaming, “Break!” Sugerman keeps toying with the purloined joint wanting to get a full scream out of the unaffiliated upstart before separating. Onika shakes the rope violently to get the ref’s attention and converts pain to volume, determined not to give the Southern belle what she wants “BREAKBREAKBREAK!!” Ref. Reginald’s on the ball and gets straight to the warning count: Debra tries her hardest to get that scream until five is on the tip of his tongue, and then releases Cassava with a showy backroll and pops up to her feet with a curtsey.
“I believe you are correct, we are not on the same level.”
Cassava ignores her opponent's needling and concentrates on climbing to her feet with ropes, wincing a bit when her left foot bears her weight. “It’ll do,” she nods to the hovering ref and approaches Debra more cautiously this time. Adopting a lower, adaptable stance to counter whatever weird glucose gymnastics Debra might have up her non-existent sleeves.
Little Debbie smugly notes Cassva’s reevaluation and slow engagement, and wallows in the dominance, "Oh my, looks like you're starting to get a little gassed. Could the extra pounds you're dragging behind you be slowing you down?"
The Countess of Candyland turns around and sticks out her rainbow-bearing, tight tush and waggles it in Cassava’s face. The audience chuckles at the temerity but this is a laying of the gauntlet to The BMD champ! Cassava shoots toward Sugerman and slaps her body against hers. Debra almost topples over but a tight Waistlock appears, pressing into her lower abdomen, taking away her breath and keeping The Countess standing. Cassava hisses to Little Debbie as she rubs her knuckles hard into her stomach, “I’m going to grind you down and take before treating you to heaping serving of Cake!”
And grind they do; Debra wriggling and getting low as she tries to break the Booty Battler’s grip, but Cassava shadows her every movement and sticks to her like glue. Meaning for a few moments the crowd stops watching a wrestling match and enjoys two hot young women in a very intimate dance. Unfortunately for the shippers out there, the dance ends too soon. Debra finds the space she needs and escapes through the side with, yes, another cartwheel! The nimble nymph rotates over and out of Cassava’s arms and spins on a heel to take the Superfan in a stomach pumping Waistlock over her own. Little Debbie gives a giggle that grates on Onika’s nerves,” I’m too fast for ya!” and adds a disrespectful pelvic thrust to her opponent’s generous behind.
Steam’s blowing out of Onika’s ears; she’s tired of being shown up and she’s ready to crumble this cookie. “Oh yeah? Two can play this game!”
Cassava lifts her palms up and throws herself into a side cartwheel almost as graceful as Debra did moments before. Cassava lands on her feet, proud she completed the escape, and the applause from the FAWNatics tells her they are too.
“Wait…”
She hears some knowing laughter from the audience; confused, Cassava looks down to see Debra's arms still wrapped around her middle. Debra had cartwheeled in perfect unison with the Kylie-stan and kept the hold intact!
Cassava goes red with embarrassment and growls as she tries to break the Georgian's grip, only to be hoisted into the air and slapped onto the mat in a belly flop. "God damNITT!"
Sugerman falls with Cassava and rolls up the Iowan’s body to take her in a North/South choke, but Cassava grabs Sugerman's hand before the loop fully tightens. There's a brief struggle on the mat as Cassava tries to rid herself of the sugary noose around her neck managing to bully them back to their feet as they pepper each other with punches with their free hands. Onika finds the leverage she was looking for and rotates out of the Headlock with Debra’s wrist in hand. Smack! And withers with a cry when Debra ripples her right tit with an Overhand Chop, she lets go of the Georgian to tend to her abused booby but Debra snags Cassava’s hand in a hurtful KnuckleLock.
“Let's go for a ride!” Debra leads Cassava by their knot of hands in a race to the closest corner and runs up the cables to flip The BMD across the Squared Circle with a Springboard Armdrag!
www.facebook.com/ImpactWrestling/videos/taylor-wilde-vs-susan-impact-may-6-2021/1185934381820407/
Cassava’s off her feet but on the ball; she rolls with landing, mitigating most of the pain and disorientation and pops back up with vengeance on her mind. She swiftly strides toward Sugerman with a prepped Clothesline that the confectionary queen ducks under as she speeds past Cassava to the ropes. The Superfan spins on a heel and follows after the fleeing blonde and stops before Sugerman reaches the cables, bending over to fling Sugerman into the air with a Back Body Drop upon her return. Debra recoils off the ropes directly into Cassava. However, instead of carelessly gutting herself on the Iowan’s shoulder she skids to a stop on her heels. Debra takes the bowed Cassava in a Front Facelock and whips herself to the canvas, hammering the top of Cassava’s head into the hard ring floor!
RUNNING DDT
www.youtube.com/watch?v=6lqWjURyuFA
The short trip with a bad landing has Onika’s brains ping-ponging inside her skull; she rebounds off the covered plywood a foot in the air. Fans see her eyes crossed as Onika careens onto her side and after a smaller bounce, flat on her face. The Superfan is motionless aside from a slight jiggle in her backside from the ring’s reverberations; Debra pulls in her knees and performs a beautiful Kip Up into a dainty curtsey to the camera. The Countess is on the most dominant stretch of her FAWN career in this match. Cassava seems to have a habit of bringing out the best in her opponents, a great way to make sure you’re on the card but a way to progress in your career.
Debra becomes aware of how awesome she’s doing and she’s rolling in it like a croissant in powdered sugar. She skips over the prone Onika and turns to face her back, putting her hands on her waist to project authority and bending 90° so the camera can catch her candy apple bottom.
"Ya know, I heard the skinny on you. And for your own benefit, I think you should switch up your idols. Emily West was a firework. Had the goods but didn't have the heart for a truly epic in-ring career and got forcibly retired in one of the rare times she showed her face. That Kylie ain't much better, a step ladder that got lucky a few times. Maybe you should study Cynthia Mitchell or Portia VanBuren?"
Cassava's face is lowered so Sugerman and the masses can't see her expression, but the FAWNatics in the front row catch The Superfan’s Buns of Destruction clenching tightly and then relaxing to their spankable default. A giffable moment that will initially be used for private pleasure, then analyzed by dirt sheets as the switch flipping in Cassava's brain.
Ignorant of the hornet's nest she kicked over; Debra climbs the buckles for her showstopping final maneuver. The Countess stands on the top ropes with her straight out in a T pose. Debra balances precariously as she swivels her hips in a fast and sultry manner, stirring the audience into a tizzy before she goes for the final stroke. "Get your cameras out for this one, it's gonna be sweet!"
With the slightest push of her feet, Debra recoils into a soaring Moonsault. She gracefully flips in the air and descends on Cassava- who surges from the ring floor and catches The Countess in a Fireman's Carry!
The Cassava Corps has "PLEASANT VALLEY DRIVER!" On the tips of their tongues but get a more than pleasant surprise when Cassava adds an innovation. With a piston of her twerking trained knees, Cassava throws the Lady of Lollipops into the pen air behind her and as Sugerman descends, Cassava thrusts out her bountiful backside and launches up, cracking Sugerman's chin with a glute of Mass Destruction!
GO TO CHEEK!
youtu.be/Ll9xFRKYYcM?t=477
The enraged follower of the Black Queen isn't done with the slanderous Sugerman yet. Rather than immediately attempting a pin, Onika turns away from Debra to cover the girl more painfully with a standing Moonsault. Spite drives the young lioness to show up the showboater with a quick but impact display of twerkmanship; pumping those cheeks once, twice, thrice before launching into a flawless backflip that crushes Debra in a tummy-on-tummy collision!
CHEEKYSAULT
www.youtube.com/watch?v=W3G52fymLDQ
There's an echoing smeck! of moist skin hitting skin as the move hits; Debra’s legs shoot up from the impact put Cassava shoves them aside. She has more pain to give. The Milk Chocolate Mauler scuttles off Debra and rapidly runs to the corner, leaping to the top buckle in a single bound. Shifting to face the ring, Cassava takes to the air like an eagle; at the apex of her jump she spreads her legs into a perfect split and descends like a dropped bomb on Debra, her glorious glutes tenderize the ex-mascot’s titties with a Diving Seated Senton!
BOMBS AWAY!
www.youtube.com/watch?v=Wq58qvVhxv4&list=PLeRPsdtvusXikFAlFp0SFvMOT6E8kSips&index=267
The on-fire fangirl actually bounces off the heaving Sugerman’s chest into a forward roll then surges to her feet. Filled with righteous anger, Cassava runs to the other side of the ring, placing a foot on the bottom cable so she can lean over the top and scream out her rage at such blasphemy. And The FAWNatics, won over by the trio of crowd-pleasing moves roar back in turn!
Down on the canvas Debra’s flopping like a fish on a hot beach, hugging her chest hoping her sternum hasn’t crumbled. In her throes of pain, Debra’s flight instinct kicks in and she angles her fits toward the ropes and worms under the bottom strand. Sugerman flounders off the apron and less than gracefully on her fours; she rises into an unsteady walk to the ramp, rubbing her chest and wheezing, “Her butt implants must be made with lead!”
Ignoring the smattering of boos being thrown at her for Debra’s second strategic retreat of the match, she stands at the ramp’s base taking deep breaths. The Countess is prepared to make the bottom-heavy brawler wait the full 20-count before she deigns to get back in that ring. Devra turns to declare this fact to Reginald and Cassava-
“UUGH!”
The self-appointed champion of Emily West flies through the top and middle ropes and crashes into Debra like she’s shot out of cannon! Cassava’s shoulder rams into the Southerner’s impish features and blows Debra off her feet into a hard fall on the ramp with her ankles around her ears.
youtu.be/sTMzDcqfzpM?t=65
Onika pushes off the cool metal of the ramp no worse for wear and charges to the guardrail, aggressively hi-fiving a cadre of Kylie Corps members in good seats. Sugerman drunkenly gets upright and in desperation to get away from this racing madwoman actually heads -toward- the ring. It doesn't matter where she goes, as long as Onika isn't there. Debra has one leg strewn over the apron and fingers curling on the bottom strand when The BMD takes notice.
"Oooh no! You're not getting off that easy!"
Cassava snags Sugarman by the scruff and waistband of her tight pants and pulls her from the apron. The Georgian's desperate grip on the bottom rope gives way with a twang, and Debra is slung haphazardly into the side of the nearest steel steps. Debra groans and cradles the back of her head as she pushes off the padded floor to a seat. She leans against the cool metal of the steps, shouting, “Violent bytch!”
CLANG!
The Milk Chocolate Mauler moves with sadistic efficiency and uses that battle-ready badonkadonk to hammer Debra with a running Hip attack that bangs her head into the steel steps!
youtu.be/vGJoRAr0epE?t=9
The FAWNatics will pop for any and all of Cassva’s booty-based offence, but even they cringe at the sound of Debra’s skull bouncing off metal. And the pain doesn’t stop there; Cassava keeps The Countess’s face submerged in Cake and starts swivelling her hips like a belly dancer on cocaine, guiding Debra through an intricate, high-speed tour of the ass snared 500, 000 subscribers. The humiliating, suffocating Booty Pop(Cassava abhors the term stinkface) also grinds the back of Sugerman’s skull against the side of the steps, moulded with a rough texture to ensure extra grip on boot soles to prevent slip and falls. Each swing of Onika’s back porch wrenches muffled, horrible screams that pleasingly vibrate The Superfan’s nethers(Hip attack 95). Over the pitiful wails of her opponent, Cassava condemns the self-centred Southerner over her wails, still irritated over Debra’s slight to her idols.
"If you're going to talk trash about the woman with the greatest mind and greatest boobs in history, you better be ready for the consequences! And to disrespect Queen Kylie is grounds to be put on the injury list!"
Cassava thrusts back to booty bop Debra against the steps one last time before she takes a step away, freeing the candy peddler’s red, greasy face and letting her take in greedy breaths. Tears flow freely down Debra’s face as she reaches back and gingerly touches the back of her head, the scalp rubbed raw by the coarse steel. Cassava stands in front of the beleaguered blonde and takes the legholes of her misaligned short-shorts by the edge, pulling them out with deliberate slowness and letting them snap back into place. A message to Debra and anyone else who thinks they can shake their ass in front of The BMD.
“If you’re done being a bytch,” Cassava pulls the softly crying Debra up by the hair. “I’ll stop kicking your ass, and we’ll de-escalate to a regular match okay? Good.”
She shoves the whimpering Countess back into the ring then lifts herself onto the apron and stands up. Cassava wipes a little sweat from her face and releases a breath, “Whewww… went to a dark place for a bit there. Now let’s get back to it!” Cassava brushes past her drastic personality shift and resumes her bubbly standard. Wanting to bring the mood back up after going ham on the rude former mascot, The Superfan pauses after stepping over the second rope and bending under the top. With a grin, Cassava gives some slow, sexy gyrations of her hips that get the Floridians hooting and whistling for a slice of cake. Now feeling much better, Cassava fully steps into the ring- “Ow!”
Debra surges off the mat like a snake waiting, snatches Onika by her two-tone coif and pulls her into a Roll Up! The Superfan finds her ankles by her ears with Debra on her sneakers leaning with all her weight on Onika’s legs.
Ref. Reginald springs into action and throws himself to the canvas, slapping “One!” As he raises his large hand he notices the hefty handful of Onika’s shorts Sugerman’s pulling on, exposing a big amount of Cassava’s butt. The alpha zebra immediately goes back to standing and points at the offence, “Miss Sugerman, release Miss Onika at once!”
Debra ignores the braying of the bestriped man and does her damndest to keep the Roll Up intact, she’s out of ideas and running on a pure, desperate need to slow things down and keep this crazy stalker from going nuts again. Reginald keeps trying to get the obstinate rulebreaker to cease and desist, “Miss Sugerman! Miss Sugerman let go now, or I will disqualify you!”
Not wanting to end a match on a PPV with a DQ, Bethany's firm voice echoes in the referee’s earpiece, "Just slap her hand!" His face grimaces at the thought of that action, but there’s no time to dither; Reginald flattens his hand into a paddle and whips it down on- Debra's arm slithers away at the last moment, so Onika's bottom takes the full brunt of Reginald's palm. Rippling her flesh with a Crack!
"Ow!"
Cassava teeters onto her side holding her brazed buns and looking at Ref. Worthington in wide eyed open mouthed shock. "What the heck!" The bewildered British man sputters something between a defence and an apology, "I-I-I well-I, my apologies! Ms.Christian said-!"
Cassava rises to her feet still gripping her cheeks and speaking quickly with intense energy. Reginald couldn't tell if she was angry or excited, "If this is something you wanna explore it’s gotta be in private and we gotta go over safe words and-”
A hand clutches Cassava’s shoulder and spins her away from her potential new bull to face an infuriated Sugerman who wraps her hands around The Superfan’s neck in a choke!
“You think you can show me up you-!”
Cassava drops into a deep crouch but she’s not buckling from the choke; she’s using those thicc, powerful stems to jump into the air. The FAWNatics cheer in amazement mistakenly thinking Sugerman’s going for a Powerbomb; instead, Cassava twists out of Debra’s grasp to face away from her as she shoots her legs back and wraps them tight around Debra’s ribs. The polished Onika swings herself between Sugerman’s legs and upends the ex-mascot onto her back. Debra tries to yell “Noo!” but gets cut off by Onika’s prodigious phatty pancaking her tits and turning Debra’s voice hoarse.
WHEELBARROW ROLL UP
youtu.be/J8XBJ9adAvE?t=69
Referee Worthington dives for the count as Cassava educates her opponent, “People think about my ass so much they forget I have skillz!”
ONE!!
TWO!!
THREE!!!
Cassava has won this battle of medias! She stands up as soon as she hears the chime of bell, freeing Debra to roll over to a side and look at the ref in shock. As the official confirms her loss, the winner of the match heads to the nearest corner, clmibs to the middle rope and saultes her fans, “WOOO! Never doubt the booty battler!”
Cassava leaps back to the ring floor to see Sugerman on her feet with her head lowered and hands on her hips. Cassava breathes through her nose and mulls over the pros and cons of another person gunning for her failure. Not liking the mat and not wanting another headache, she approaches Sugerman, "Hey, great match. Could we move past all the bullshit and start over? We don't need-"
Debra cuts her off with a shove, almost bowling over the startled victress. She grabs Cassava by her white tank and pulls her close; the Candy Countess's pretty features is twisted with anger as she berates Cassava with a voice that is noticeably devoid of an accent.
"You got lucky with a cheap Roll-up, you punk! We do this again and I'll-"
Smack!
Cassava swivels Sugerman's head and torso with the bytchiest of bytch slaps. The blonde twists back; Debra’s angry expression changes into the how-could-you? shock of someone who's just been slapped, complete with a pink handprint tattooing her cheek. She reels back a hand for a return volley and doubles over with a comical "Guuah!" When Cassava pulls her by the hair into a Broadside Kneelift.
"I was trying to bury this petty shit, but you just had to be a bitch, didn't you!"
The Superfan drops down and slips her head between Debra's legs while grabbing the blonde above the knees. Cassava straightens up, draping her defeated opponent down her back, "If you don't like losing, stop peacocking and hit the gym!"
The struggling Southerner bleats out "N-no!" Before Onika plummets onto her haunches, spiking Debra's crown into the hard plywood of the ring floor.
UPSIDE DOWN CAKE
youtu.be/Dz3-M3y6xCE?t=519
Cassava releases Debra's legs, and the definitively beaten Countess slumps off her to the mat, legs straight, arms out and her snoozing face resting on a cheek. Cassava pops back up and pops a moderately sized bicep for the cameras, "Talk shit, get hit."
She turns and looks down at the finally silent Sugerman. Cassava, on principle, is not one for going 'old school' after winning, but she's not above humbling a bitch. With hands daintily placed on her hips, Cassava brings a foot to Debra's face and pinches the sleeping beauty's cute nose between her big and second toes, using it to lead Debra's face to the lights.
"You could have walked to the back under your own power with my respect.”
Those nostrils stay shut till the breathing restriction uncomfortably rouses Debra. She groans and whimpers as the grip tightens and Cassava in a literal sense, guides her by the nose, shaking her head back and forth till Debra is cognizant enough to learn her lesson. When she tries to mumble something Cassava forces her toes between the crushed Countess’ lips.
“Now you’re getting carried back with my foot sweat in your mouth; you better learn from this.”
With the battle between chocolate cake and vanilla loaf now decided, the ring crew walks down to prepare for the next match.
www.youtube.com/watch?v=TXma0EkrrYQ
A short but curvaceous Black woman steps through the curtain, raising a fist to the cries of the crowd. A softly smiling Cassava Onika claps a few times before putting her hands on her hips, the normally high-energy, eternally positive New Media Mistress seems muted tonight. The forced retirement of Emily West, her secondary idol and future co-wife with future wife Kylie Sanders (Emily is unaware of this intention and has never met Cassava, Kylie is also unaware of these intentions) has her feeling down, despite the actual events happening some time ago. The lifelong Youtuber was working on a retrospective of The Academic’s excellent career when reality insisted itself yet again and made Cassava sad. She has to power through this dark mood, or she’ll be a half-step behind her opponent the whole night.
Cassava slaps her cheeks and starts hopping from foot to foot, muttering to herself, ”Head in the game… we can be down later. Let’s do this!”
The host of FAWN Finds is dressed for battle in a white tank top that shows a hint of her belly button, a red bra is visible through the thin fabric that's barely keeping her F Cup breasts from flashing the fans as she bounces to and fro. On her wide hips is a pair of pink booty shorts that seemed painted on (and a size too small), and just above those was a wide leather strap of the BMD title. The nature and design of the belt dictated that the gold plate be showcased just above its holder’s buns. The inward curve of the center gold plate resting on Onika’s shelf of ass like it was always meant to be there. She chooses to wrestle in bare feet like her hero Kylie Sanders once did, that worship clearly bleeding into her wardrobe and choice of hair dye (blonde with pink highlights).
At the top of the ramp, Cassava swings her hips into a turn that puts her back to the audience, presenting an ass that makes LaKeisha Bates self-conscious whether she admits it or not. She gives it a crowd-pleasing shimmy before making her way down to the ring, slapping hands that reach for her as she goes.
“FROM PLEASANT VALLEY, IOWA… SHE STANDS FIVE FEET, TWO INCHES TALL, AND WEIGHS IN TONIGHT AT ONE HUNDRED TWENTY-FIVE POUNDS… SHE IS THE WOMAN OF 1,000 HIP ATTACKS AND THE FIRST, CURRENT, AND ONLY BUNS OF MASS DESTRUCTION CHAMPION...THIS IS CASSAVA ONIKA!!”
CASSAVA ONIKA
Nearly completing her circuit of fan greets, Cassava looks in the ring and nods at FAWN’s newest and buffest referee Reginald, who is just poured in those black and white stripes (Commissioner Bethany Christian insisted on taking the measurements herself and supervised the fitting).
REGINALD WORTHINGTON THE THIRD
A small grin spreads across the young grappler’s face. Before heading to her corner, she passes by the announcer, cups his ear and whispers something. He chortles and brings the microphone to his lips.
“OFFICIATING THE MATCH WILL BE ‘PRESIDENT PECS AND THE ARCHDUKE OF ABS’ REGINALD WORTHINGTON THE THIRD!!!”
Reggie lets out a small laugh as he gets a small pop from the crowd and playfully curls a bicep, causing men in the audience to wince from the high-pitched squealing from the female fans. Giggling, Cassava rolls into the ring and goes to her corner for a pat-down. Reggie lightly touches her shoulders and wrists, inspecting for foreign objects while they wait for her opponent to make her entrance.
A catchy guitar riff blasts through the speakers, and someone cuts the power to the lights. The crowd comes alive as spotlights glare and target the entrance at the top of the ramp.
www.youtube.com/watch?v=lubaolhjzig
The charismatic wrestler and former mascot of her family’s company, Debra Sugerman, playfully marches out of the curtain, twirling her literal candy cane. The lightweight masterfully leads the masses in a wave of cheers travelling from one side of the building to the other, each one of the thousands-strong crowd following the arc of her baton like a symphony obeying its maestro.
“Weighing in at 121lbs, standing 5 feet and 5 inches, and hails from Valdosta, Georgia, by way of Stone Mountain. The face of Sugerman Confectionary, and it’s the Sweetest you’ll ever see! Debra ‘Little Debbieee’ Suugerrrmaaan!!!”
DEBRA SUGERMAN
Step inside, walk this way
You and me, babe
Hey, hey
The people are singing along to Ninja Sex Party’s cover within the first beats of the song, bobbing and swaying while they take in the bright-eyed and bushy-tailed newcomer. Fans of beach fighting and FAWN’s newest Indie partner, LAW (Ladies of Adventurous Wrestling), know the young rookie will put on a show the moment she's in the public eye. From head to ankle, Debra’s gear is a swirling rainbow of sequins glittering under the harsh lights of FAWN, and if you look close enough, each bead resembles a wrapped hard candy. The radiant sweets travelled up each arm from the wrist into the turtle neck of a VERY cropped top, the hemline serving as the bottom of the cups for her pert chest, with a wide triangle panel cut out to show off the sweets. After miles of bare, lightly toned belly is a pair of tight pants that clung to her legs like a candy coating; patches of material are cut out from the side of each leg, so Debra’s pale skin pushes through the opening. Hence, SUGERMAN blazed no matter what angle you saw the Countess of Candyland.
Debra twirls her 4-foot cane in front of her through two arcs before pointing it straight to the sky. The apparent signal turns the house lights back on. The walking instrument resembled a candy cane with a green gumdrop bottom that consisted of rubber with a glitter dusting. Instead of a hook or knob, the baton exploded at its top with a bouquet of round lollipops. Shaking her hips to the beat and singing of the crowd, Debra plucks a pomegranate-flavoured sucker out of the arrangement and gives it a quick tongue lashing. Pointing the now glistening candy at the camera zooming in, Sugerman chirps in a southern accent, “Y’all ready to see me beat this gal into frosting? If you’re good, I’ll let you lick the spoon!"
She places the confection back between her smiling lips before setting off on a hip-swivelling march around the ring. The candy heiress’s wavy blonde hair tickles the nape of her neck with each timed step; Debra encourages the masses to continue their serenade by swinging and pointing the cane to guide the fans’ voices, playing choirmaster to the largest choir in the world.
Take a bottle!
Shake it up!
Break the bubble!
Break it up!
As the crowd is about to launch into the chorus, Debra sprints up the ring steps, her candy-apple red running shoes reflecting the light. Debra spins against the ropes along the apron, not stopping till she’s dead center in the Hard cam’s sight; Debra tucks in her arms, holding the cane horizontally and crouches low into a tight ball. Tensing like a coiled spring, Sugerman hears the chorus start and bursts into the air! Spreading her limbs out and straight, she lands on the apron in a wide stance like a jubilant star. Packets of sugar drop from the ceiling and scatter onto the audience as the FAWNatics loudly sing.
Pour some sugar on me!!
The music dies down, but Little Debbie doesn't enter the ring. She turns the sucker in her mouth between thumb and forefinger as she eyes the front row, searching for the biggest hunk in- There he is! “If I take you home to mama, she might try to take ya for herself!”
Spotting a short king in a Cassava Onika/FAWN Finds t-shirt, the flaxen-haired rookie with flair saunters over, swaying her just recently used lollipop high in the air, making the hawt ticket buyer wobble his head in synchronicity. His jaws are wide open to accept the plane coming in for a landing, but you can still tell he’s smiling from his bright eyes and the raised corners of his mouth, the crowd playing up the scene, echoing in unison, “ooooooooOOOHHHH…” as the candy draws near, then “YARRHHHH!!” Erupting in cheers when he gleefully takes the lollipop in his teeth, a few fans are a little disgusted with the indirect spit swap, but given the nature of FAWN, you’d think they’d be okay with FAR worse, don’t you think?
The combative cuties head towards each other, Sugerman with a sassy sway in her step. Cassava intimates a handshake that the natural blonde takes with no hesitation. "Pleasure to officially meet you. How about we burn this place down?"
"The pleasure's mine, sweetheart," Debra's voice is as saccharin as possible, Cassava tries to take it at face value, but it puts her on edge. Cassava was in TV Champion Crystal Hilton’s corner months ago when she beat Sugerman, but the match was fought clean, so hopefully, there’s no grudge under the surface. "Been looking to meet up with you for a while; you've made many friends in LAW. They told me all about you during my schoolin'.
"All good I hope," Cassava backs away and settles into a wrestler's crouch, Debra mirrors her stance and starts to circle on the balls of her feet.
Debra grins with a quick nod, "Oh, yes!" The two come together in an Elbow and Collar like they're magnetically charged, "You're quite popular in Phoenix still. Been making them proud, seeing a trainee of theirs grab the spotlight. But I guess you online celebrity types gotta think on your feet to stay relevant."
Cassava quirks an eyebrow at the inadvertent(?) insult and pivots in her bare feet, slipping out of the grapple with Debra's wrist in hand. She
pirouettes under the limb to twist it in an Arm Wringer. "You're talking about my show, FAWN Finds? Yeah, you gotta keep it fresh to stay relevant, same with anyone in the entertainment biz." The BMD twists Debra's arm again, pausing to jar the blonde's elbow against her shoulder before completing the painful rotation.
Sugerman bites the inside of her cheek and slaps at her shoulder to disperse the pain; Onika applies more pressure as she raises the arm making Debra double over, "You must get that. You were the Sugerman mascot, right? Before they got Sally the Sugarglider?"
Debra feels a flash of lightning-intense hate for that damn cartoon tramp and for Cassava for bringing that disgrace up, “I’m always fresh, Sugar buns. That was just an opportunity for bigger venues.” The Georgian starts stomping a sneaker, probing for The Superfan’s toes, but Cassava keeps her piggies safe and away from Debra’s heel. The dyed blonde pulls the pilfered arm across her body and raises her left knee; she bends Sugerman’s arm around her thigh and keeps it in place with her calf. Cassava leans a right arm around Sugerman’s waist and presses down on the back of her head as she throws themselves to the mat, upending the former mascot onto her shoulders and leaving Debra's patootie in the air and squirming during Worthington’s count.
youtu.be/1fW4Qpz148c?t=104
ONE!
TWO!!
Debra nearly kicks herself into a headstand to escape and falls onto her side. She rushes to her feet simultaneously as Onika darts to her side for a Hip Toss. Debra tenses and tries to take Onika off her feet, but the Booty Battler bears down and uses her lower center of gravity to halt the move in its tracks. Cassava reverses the toss and flips Debra to the mat. The former mascot speedily gets up with a grimace and reaches for Onika but gets her wrist grabbed instead. The Superfan pulls Sugerman into a Kneelift to the gut that doubles the natural blonde over; Cassava straddles the arm and turns into Sugerman, bending the limb into a Hammerlock, then raises her left leg against the blonde’s belly and places her ankle on Debra’s hip.
“Been training with La Sombra, lately,” Cassava chirps as drops backward to the canvas sending Sugerman tumbling overhead, “I think it’s going well.”
Sugerman grunts angrily as she hits the ring floor and quickly rolls to her feet; she pushes to standing just in time for Cassava’s bare soles to smack into her face and knock her flat with a Dropkick. Cassava pounces on Debra with a snug Lateral cover, pulling in the far leg and pressing her far larger tits into Debra’s more modest pair.
ONE!
TWO!
Debra kicks out and immediately scampers from under Onika to the safety of the bottom rope, grabbing it with both hands and crossing her ankles around it to guarantee the official’s protection. Referee Reginald shifts between the two asking Cassava to give some space, and the Iowan concedes without argument. She gets up and backs away to impressed applause from the FAWNatics; Orlando likes the show of technique from the young lioness. Maybe Cassava should fight when she’s sad more often?
Debra gets up with as much dignity as possible, making a show of adjusting her ring togs, and fluffing up her hair, "La Sombra's from that group of weird Canadians, right? They're good, you gals should collab on something." She approaches with arms open for a grapple that Cassava eagerly accepts. Their foreheads and middles rub and slide off each other as the women struggle for dominance. The Countess feels a stab of indignation and bubbling anger toward her LAW school sempai as Cassava's juggs dominate and flatten the Georgian's more modest Mounds. Debra puts some muscle into a swing that sets Cassava off balance; The Candy Countess loops around The Superfan and takes her in a Hammerlock. "Like a Twitch stream or Reaction video, that's what YouTubers do for money, right? It's like playing bucket drums for coins, just online, now that I think about it."
Cassava stifles a growl and winces as Sugarman tries to pop her shoulder out. The Superfan throws an elbow back to check the uppity Southerner in the mouth, but Sugarman catches it and now has Cassava stuck in dual Hammerlocks. Debra cranks on the twin holds, making Cassava arch her back in pain and thrust out her shoulder boulders to an appreciative audience. Debra keeps her homestyle brand of smack talk going.
"Don't get ornery now. It takes a lot of talent to be a successful street walker- oops," Onika growls as Debra catches herself in a faux faux pas, "I mean content creator."
With Onika's arms painfully trapped, Sugarman easily trots the Online Sensation to the side of the ring where the Hard Cam records. Sugarman forces Onika's front against the ropes, using the top strand to bisect The BMD's juggs before they roll over and rest on top of it. The FAWNatics get a lovely shot of Cassava's calcium cannons lightly bouncing on the rope. Debra keeps a fuming Onika in place till the ref counts “Four!” and then breaks away with a showy flourish, spinning away with a pirouette and curtsying to Cassava at center ring. The former mascot was facing her back, but Cassava could see her smug face in the FAWNtron.
Turning to face the Southern tart, Cassava looks at Sugarman disapprovingly, "I'm beginning to think we're not gonna get along, Debra."
"Oh, we're gonna get along just fine," Debra waves that notion off with her trademark smile that's beginning to piss Cassava off. The Superfan approaches, cracking her knuckles while The Countess preens like she performed a chore that got her clothes dirty.
"Right now, we're just establishing the top brand. Separating the Oreos from the Hydrox."
"Bitch, you did not just call me an Oreo!" Cassava barks angrily as she stomps into Debra, breathing fire and ready to trounce the lighter Lightweight. Despite her demure smile, Debra is just as eager to butt heads with the booty battler, quite literally. The blonde stoops to grind her forehead against the shorter Cassava, her never ceasing advert smile not shifting a millimetre, further infuriating The Superfan. Their tête-à-tête devolves into a shoving match, then shrieks and shouts as they escalate into hair-pulling. The two circle and sway in a hateful dance as they wrench each other’s heads in all directions and tug and tear at each other's locks. The Florida audience is hootin’ and hollerin’ at this catfighting scene, but Worthington has to ruin the moment and restore order. The buff and British ref politely looms over the snarling wrestlers, “Ladies, I must insist you separate and restart the match, please. This isn’t a Penthouse fight.”
Hissing at the try-hard Confederate tugging at her two-tone follicles, Cassava risked a glance at the burly official, "I think we're gonna need a count, Reggie. OW! Bitch!" A sharp pull on her hair urges Cassava to respond in kind, Debra makes a noise akin to a tea kettle, and she drags her nails across the wannabe celeb's scalp. "Yes, sugar please do. I'd love for a strong gentleman to keep some order around-AAie! Slattern!"
Reginald shakes his head, this is why he usually dates men. The Alpha Zebra does his duty, "One! Two! Three!..."
Third time's the charm; the wrestlers separate and back away, but their eyes never deviate and remain locked in a stare-down as they circle the black and white pillar of a referee before expanding to the perimeter of the Squared Circle. They close in on each other slowly before darting toward each other with violent intentions.
The dangerous Debra flattens a palm and angles her arm across her chest, firing a Knife-edge Chop when the content creator comes close. Cassava takes it on a boxer's guard and shrugs off the sting to show Debra how to REALLY chop a chest. The Superfan strikes true and puts a red welt on Sugarman's vanilla cupcakes with a loud crack!
Debra squeaks like a stepped-on mouse and puts a gentle hand on her chastised lovelies. Her expression twists in fury and lunges at Cassava just to get another Knife-edge across the swell of her breasts. While Debra flinches and cries out, Cassava loads another Bloodwind blast and hits the sugar mama with a third chop, and then a fourth, a fifth, and a sixth! Debra’s painfully backed into a corner; Cassava quickly moves her opponent’s arms behind the top ropes, and instead of continuing the Chopfest, turns away while taking the middle ropes in hand.
"You seemed fine showing off my bodacious bounty, can't take it when your good and not-so plenties are in the spotlight? That’s alright. I’ll switch it up."
Onika thrusts out her body with her pelvis leading the way and throws herself back against the natural blonde, cudgelling Debra's stomach with her vaunted Buns of Mass Destruction. Onika feels a wheezing burst of air from Debra’s lips tickle the base of her neck and repeats the butt beating with a smile. The Superfan gets another four shots in before the referee’s count forces her to disengage; Sugerman holds her stomach and sinks to a seat on the middle buckle while Cassava struts to center ring and gives the fans a quick bump and grind that that’s VERY appreciated, “That’s Hip attack 292 for those keeping track.”
Wanting to buy time to plan her next move, Debra stays in the safety of the corner for longer than allowed, playing up the pain in her guts with all the skills she learned in high school drama class to ward off the official. Holding abdomen and writhing, “Uhhh… check her shorts foreign objects she’s hiding weights!”
“Roll outside the ring and take a walk if you need time,” offers Cassava plainly, with hands on hips and a raised eyebrow, “Or, better yet, walk home if you're going to wrestle like this.”
Sugerman buries an urge to run over and rip out Cassava's hair by the roots. Instead, she straightens up with a composed air and walks to meet her with the same poise and grace she displayed during a press conference with the American Diabetes Society.
"Pardon me for needing a moment after taking that bag of Bowling balls you call an ass to the tummy. Are they filling implants with concrete nowadays? Didn't feel like silicone."
Cassava goes silent and her eyes widen as she processes that verbal slap in the face. She stares at Debra's smug face a moment before tilting her head back in realization. "Oooh, you're just a fake bitch, aren't you? Alright, I get it now."
The dyed blonde walks up to the natural blonde and pokes a finger over Debra's heart, "Maybe you're thinking because we both lost to my friend Crystal that we're on the same level. Trust me, we are not."
Debra scoffs, "of course not, your family'd have to move up a few tax brackets to be accepted into the buildings as mine."
Onika snarls and whips her hand forward to slap the vanilla off this bytch's face but whiffs over Sugerman's crown. The Caucasian wrestler suddenly shrinks several feet from Onika's perspective; in actuality, Sugerman dropped in a perfect split, a skill gained from years of cheerleading. Debra fires a jab into Cassava's belly button from the lower position doubling The Superfan over with a squawk, making her chin an easy target for the uppercut that takes Cassava off her feet. Debra rises after a successful Crackerjack combo and retreats for a speed boost from the ropes; Cassava sits up to see Debra darting forward and, on instinct, crosses her arms protectively over her face. The Countess delights her court with a cartwheel that rotates Debra to Cassava’s left, where she can boot the BMD in the jaw, bypassing the makeshift shield.
www.youtube.com/watch?v=JrxZkR5ytAQ
Cassava’s chin leads the way as she crumbles to the canvas on her side, absentmindedly moving her jaw to check for clicks. She may have gotten up on her own power, but Debra takes that future away by taking the hourglassed shaped hottie by the straps of her tanktop and bra and dragging Cassava to her limited verticality. Debra takes a big step back with one of Cassava’s wrists in hand and Whips her Irish style into the farthest set of buckles. The Superfan’s bare feet fly across the canvas at a good clip, but she turns in time to spare her jiggling front a painful stop to take less smarting bump with her back. Debra’s not too happy about Cassava’s cannon’s escaping their fate and sprints after the dyed blonde and throws herself into Spinning Leg Lariat that flattens Cassava’s mountains and puts a shiver in her frame.
www.youtube.com/watch?v=u_7AOFYmH7Y
Winded, Cassava sinks into a seat on the middle buckle with her red bra askew under her tank top, the left cup having travelled into her cleavage. Debra sees AC has the Iowan sporting glass cutters from the tent on her left hill and gleefully gives it a twist! Cassava loudly hisses, straightens with a jolt, and grabs Debra’s wrist, but the blonde uses the nub like a radio dial she hates, making Cassava yelp and stamp her feet.
“Looks like you need some ring-appropriate attire, sweetheart,” Debra advises, chock full of saccharin. She leads Cassava out of the corner by the titty, step by speedy step with hurtful tugs, “Is the price a barrier? Well, I can help you out. My purse strings aren’t so-” Smack! Smack!
Sugerman’s cheeks get paintbrushed with successive, rapid, Bytch slaps that swivel the heiress’s head back and forth. The catty attack frees Cassava’s teat from Debra’s pincer, and since she enjoyed it so much, Cassava does it again and really puts her hips into each swing.
SMACK! SMACK!
Debra teeters back with handprints on her face as red as her shoes. The sense seems to have been slapped out of her because when Cassava draws near, she resorts to some schoolyard slapping that Superfan brushes aside to grab a handful of Debra’s honey-hued locks and pull her into a Kneelift. The Countess doubles around the joint groan that turns into a whimper when Cassava applies a tight side Headlock that feels like it’ll pop Debra’s head off like the cork of a champagne bottle.
“I’m giving you one last chance, Sugerman.” Cassava brandishes an olive branch with firm authority as she lowers to a knee and tightens the lock. “This doesn’t have to become a thing. We can have a straight match, shake hands after and walk away.”
Sugerman surprises Onika and earns a spot in tomorrow’s highlight reel by nimbly kicking off the canvas and arcing her body to cartwheel out of the Headlock into the space in front of the BMD champion. Onika looks up, bewildered to see the sole of Sugerman’s sneaker coming at her at 88 miles an hour!
SUGERKICK!
youtu.be/YmQhiLpfYFM?t=1266
Cassava jerks her head back but the SuperKick glances off her chin, shaking her brain and leaving The BMD temporarily stunned on the canvas. Debra runs to the eastward ropes and springs into another cartwheel, this one of the hands-free variety, and Splashes onto Cassava like she was a crash pad.
www.youtube.com/watch?v=KpMy30sU1js
When 121lbs of bitch blonde drops onto her tummy, Cassava’s legs shoot up and Debra snags her right leg around the knee before it falls away, pulling in deep to secure her first and last cover of the match.
ONE!
TWONOO!!
Cassava rips her leg free and turns away from Debra onto her side, stopping the count. Debra’s lip curls in dissatisfaction, and she swats Cassava on the rump, “Don’t draw this out.” She drags Cassava up by the hair and the waistband, pulling up on the latter so a glute of destruction is bared by a half-wedgie. The Superfan loudly protests as the Southerner hikes up her shorts to a biting degree and walks her in a wide circle to show the Orlando audience that the top blonde is the natural blonde!
Done with their promenading, Debra angles Onika to the farthest corner, switches her grip from the booty battler’s shorts to her wrist, and then sends her flying to the corner with a deep Irish Whip. As Cassava runs(and bounces) to the buckles she catches the FAWNtronin the corner of an eye and sees Debra speeding after her; Cassava throws herself at the corner and seizes the top ropes and kicks up her naked feet at Debra’s face. The Countess manages to slip under the mule Dropkick and has to throw her hands up to avoid an ugly buckle-to-face collision as Cassava floats over Debra’s body to the canvas. Sugerman straightens just as a pair of strong, feminine arms cuddle her waist and lifts her up and carry Sugerman a couple of metres away from a rope break.
“Looks like you finally decided to wrestle!” Onika exclaims happily as she shows off the power in that shortstack frame of hers; Onika keeps her patois-speaking prey in the air so when she puts the squeeze on, Debra’s legs kick and flail in the air as she tries to break the Superfan’s grip. “If you focused more on grappling than your marketing, you’d see some success outside of the Jungle.”
Cassava lowers Debra to terra firma for a proper liftoff to a German Suplex but gets another showing of Debra’s cheerleading skills instead. Little Debbie hurls herself into a speedy somersault; Cassava finds herself faceplanting on the mat and her left leg painfully contorted in a Leglock! Debra cuts off circulation below the knee with a Scissors while trying to pop off Cassava’s foot with an Ankle Lock!
ROLLING LEGLOCK
www.youtube.com/watch?v=F-I0qyBViAk
Debra grins maliciously and moves Cassava's foot to an angle it was not designed to achieve. She taunts over the dyed blonde's resulting screams, "I got the multitasking skills to kick ass between the ropes and in front of the camera!”
A slight twist on her ankle and it's like acid running through Cassava's veins! The Superfan starts to look like her often abused idol, Kylie Sanders, suffering valiantly against a fate determined to see her fail. Cassava pulls at her hair to distract from Debra's manipulations of her ankle and whines a high-pitched whine choked down from a total scream. Forcing reason above the fog of agony, The Superfan stamps her palms on the coarse ring floor and hand-walks to the closet set of ropes; digging in her fingernails hard with each ‘step’ Cassava drags their combined in a laborious but speedy trek to safety. Debra doesn’t actively impede her beast of burden, but delights in working her hold to make the trip as excruciating as possible; tightening her thighs on Cassava’s leg with the intent to leave behind a stump and moving The BMD’s ankle like it’s a jigsaw puzzle.
Several yelps, curses and loud threats in rapid succession later, Onika has her coiled around the bottom rope, screaming, “Break!” Sugerman keeps toying with the purloined joint wanting to get a full scream out of the unaffiliated upstart before separating. Onika shakes the rope violently to get the ref’s attention and converts pain to volume, determined not to give the Southern belle what she wants “BREAKBREAKBREAK!!” Ref. Reginald’s on the ball and gets straight to the warning count: Debra tries her hardest to get that scream until five is on the tip of his tongue, and then releases Cassava with a showy backroll and pops up to her feet with a curtsey.
“I believe you are correct, we are not on the same level.”
Cassava ignores her opponent's needling and concentrates on climbing to her feet with ropes, wincing a bit when her left foot bears her weight. “It’ll do,” she nods to the hovering ref and approaches Debra more cautiously this time. Adopting a lower, adaptable stance to counter whatever weird glucose gymnastics Debra might have up her non-existent sleeves.
Little Debbie smugly notes Cassva’s reevaluation and slow engagement, and wallows in the dominance, "Oh my, looks like you're starting to get a little gassed. Could the extra pounds you're dragging behind you be slowing you down?"
The Countess of Candyland turns around and sticks out her rainbow-bearing, tight tush and waggles it in Cassava’s face. The audience chuckles at the temerity but this is a laying of the gauntlet to The BMD champ! Cassava shoots toward Sugerman and slaps her body against hers. Debra almost topples over but a tight Waistlock appears, pressing into her lower abdomen, taking away her breath and keeping The Countess standing. Cassava hisses to Little Debbie as she rubs her knuckles hard into her stomach, “I’m going to grind you down and take before treating you to heaping serving of Cake!”
And grind they do; Debra wriggling and getting low as she tries to break the Booty Battler’s grip, but Cassava shadows her every movement and sticks to her like glue. Meaning for a few moments the crowd stops watching a wrestling match and enjoys two hot young women in a very intimate dance. Unfortunately for the shippers out there, the dance ends too soon. Debra finds the space she needs and escapes through the side with, yes, another cartwheel! The nimble nymph rotates over and out of Cassava’s arms and spins on a heel to take the Superfan in a stomach pumping Waistlock over her own. Little Debbie gives a giggle that grates on Onika’s nerves,” I’m too fast for ya!” and adds a disrespectful pelvic thrust to her opponent’s generous behind.
Steam’s blowing out of Onika’s ears; she’s tired of being shown up and she’s ready to crumble this cookie. “Oh yeah? Two can play this game!”
Cassava lifts her palms up and throws herself into a side cartwheel almost as graceful as Debra did moments before. Cassava lands on her feet, proud she completed the escape, and the applause from the FAWNatics tells her they are too.
“Wait…”
She hears some knowing laughter from the audience; confused, Cassava looks down to see Debra's arms still wrapped around her middle. Debra had cartwheeled in perfect unison with the Kylie-stan and kept the hold intact!
Cassava goes red with embarrassment and growls as she tries to break the Georgian's grip, only to be hoisted into the air and slapped onto the mat in a belly flop. "God damNITT!"
Sugerman falls with Cassava and rolls up the Iowan’s body to take her in a North/South choke, but Cassava grabs Sugerman's hand before the loop fully tightens. There's a brief struggle on the mat as Cassava tries to rid herself of the sugary noose around her neck managing to bully them back to their feet as they pepper each other with punches with their free hands. Onika finds the leverage she was looking for and rotates out of the Headlock with Debra’s wrist in hand. Smack! And withers with a cry when Debra ripples her right tit with an Overhand Chop, she lets go of the Georgian to tend to her abused booby but Debra snags Cassava’s hand in a hurtful KnuckleLock.
“Let's go for a ride!” Debra leads Cassava by their knot of hands in a race to the closest corner and runs up the cables to flip The BMD across the Squared Circle with a Springboard Armdrag!
www.facebook.com/ImpactWrestling/videos/taylor-wilde-vs-susan-impact-may-6-2021/1185934381820407/
Cassava’s off her feet but on the ball; she rolls with landing, mitigating most of the pain and disorientation and pops back up with vengeance on her mind. She swiftly strides toward Sugerman with a prepped Clothesline that the confectionary queen ducks under as she speeds past Cassava to the ropes. The Superfan spins on a heel and follows after the fleeing blonde and stops before Sugerman reaches the cables, bending over to fling Sugerman into the air with a Back Body Drop upon her return. Debra recoils off the ropes directly into Cassava. However, instead of carelessly gutting herself on the Iowan’s shoulder she skids to a stop on her heels. Debra takes the bowed Cassava in a Front Facelock and whips herself to the canvas, hammering the top of Cassava’s head into the hard ring floor!
RUNNING DDT
www.youtube.com/watch?v=6lqWjURyuFA
The short trip with a bad landing has Onika’s brains ping-ponging inside her skull; she rebounds off the covered plywood a foot in the air. Fans see her eyes crossed as Onika careens onto her side and after a smaller bounce, flat on her face. The Superfan is motionless aside from a slight jiggle in her backside from the ring’s reverberations; Debra pulls in her knees and performs a beautiful Kip Up into a dainty curtsey to the camera. The Countess is on the most dominant stretch of her FAWN career in this match. Cassava seems to have a habit of bringing out the best in her opponents, a great way to make sure you’re on the card but a way to progress in your career.
Debra becomes aware of how awesome she’s doing and she’s rolling in it like a croissant in powdered sugar. She skips over the prone Onika and turns to face her back, putting her hands on her waist to project authority and bending 90° so the camera can catch her candy apple bottom.
"Ya know, I heard the skinny on you. And for your own benefit, I think you should switch up your idols. Emily West was a firework. Had the goods but didn't have the heart for a truly epic in-ring career and got forcibly retired in one of the rare times she showed her face. That Kylie ain't much better, a step ladder that got lucky a few times. Maybe you should study Cynthia Mitchell or Portia VanBuren?"
Cassava's face is lowered so Sugerman and the masses can't see her expression, but the FAWNatics in the front row catch The Superfan’s Buns of Destruction clenching tightly and then relaxing to their spankable default. A giffable moment that will initially be used for private pleasure, then analyzed by dirt sheets as the switch flipping in Cassava's brain.
Ignorant of the hornet's nest she kicked over; Debra climbs the buckles for her showstopping final maneuver. The Countess stands on the top ropes with her straight out in a T pose. Debra balances precariously as she swivels her hips in a fast and sultry manner, stirring the audience into a tizzy before she goes for the final stroke. "Get your cameras out for this one, it's gonna be sweet!"
With the slightest push of her feet, Debra recoils into a soaring Moonsault. She gracefully flips in the air and descends on Cassava- who surges from the ring floor and catches The Countess in a Fireman's Carry!
The Cassava Corps has "PLEASANT VALLEY DRIVER!" On the tips of their tongues but get a more than pleasant surprise when Cassava adds an innovation. With a piston of her twerking trained knees, Cassava throws the Lady of Lollipops into the pen air behind her and as Sugerman descends, Cassava thrusts out her bountiful backside and launches up, cracking Sugerman's chin with a glute of Mass Destruction!
GO TO CHEEK!
youtu.be/Ll9xFRKYYcM?t=477
The enraged follower of the Black Queen isn't done with the slanderous Sugerman yet. Rather than immediately attempting a pin, Onika turns away from Debra to cover the girl more painfully with a standing Moonsault. Spite drives the young lioness to show up the showboater with a quick but impact display of twerkmanship; pumping those cheeks once, twice, thrice before launching into a flawless backflip that crushes Debra in a tummy-on-tummy collision!
CHEEKYSAULT
www.youtube.com/watch?v=W3G52fymLDQ
There's an echoing smeck! of moist skin hitting skin as the move hits; Debra’s legs shoot up from the impact put Cassava shoves them aside. She has more pain to give. The Milk Chocolate Mauler scuttles off Debra and rapidly runs to the corner, leaping to the top buckle in a single bound. Shifting to face the ring, Cassava takes to the air like an eagle; at the apex of her jump she spreads her legs into a perfect split and descends like a dropped bomb on Debra, her glorious glutes tenderize the ex-mascot’s titties with a Diving Seated Senton!
BOMBS AWAY!
www.youtube.com/watch?v=Wq58qvVhxv4&list=PLeRPsdtvusXikFAlFp0SFvMOT6E8kSips&index=267
The on-fire fangirl actually bounces off the heaving Sugerman’s chest into a forward roll then surges to her feet. Filled with righteous anger, Cassava runs to the other side of the ring, placing a foot on the bottom cable so she can lean over the top and scream out her rage at such blasphemy. And The FAWNatics, won over by the trio of crowd-pleasing moves roar back in turn!
Down on the canvas Debra’s flopping like a fish on a hot beach, hugging her chest hoping her sternum hasn’t crumbled. In her throes of pain, Debra’s flight instinct kicks in and she angles her fits toward the ropes and worms under the bottom strand. Sugerman flounders off the apron and less than gracefully on her fours; she rises into an unsteady walk to the ramp, rubbing her chest and wheezing, “Her butt implants must be made with lead!”
Ignoring the smattering of boos being thrown at her for Debra’s second strategic retreat of the match, she stands at the ramp’s base taking deep breaths. The Countess is prepared to make the bottom-heavy brawler wait the full 20-count before she deigns to get back in that ring. Devra turns to declare this fact to Reginald and Cassava-
“UUGH!”
The self-appointed champion of Emily West flies through the top and middle ropes and crashes into Debra like she’s shot out of cannon! Cassava’s shoulder rams into the Southerner’s impish features and blows Debra off her feet into a hard fall on the ramp with her ankles around her ears.
youtu.be/sTMzDcqfzpM?t=65
Onika pushes off the cool metal of the ramp no worse for wear and charges to the guardrail, aggressively hi-fiving a cadre of Kylie Corps members in good seats. Sugerman drunkenly gets upright and in desperation to get away from this racing madwoman actually heads -toward- the ring. It doesn't matter where she goes, as long as Onika isn't there. Debra has one leg strewn over the apron and fingers curling on the bottom strand when The BMD takes notice.
"Oooh no! You're not getting off that easy!"
Cassava snags Sugarman by the scruff and waistband of her tight pants and pulls her from the apron. The Georgian's desperate grip on the bottom rope gives way with a twang, and Debra is slung haphazardly into the side of the nearest steel steps. Debra groans and cradles the back of her head as she pushes off the padded floor to a seat. She leans against the cool metal of the steps, shouting, “Violent bytch!”
CLANG!
The Milk Chocolate Mauler moves with sadistic efficiency and uses that battle-ready badonkadonk to hammer Debra with a running Hip attack that bangs her head into the steel steps!
youtu.be/vGJoRAr0epE?t=9
The FAWNatics will pop for any and all of Cassva’s booty-based offence, but even they cringe at the sound of Debra’s skull bouncing off metal. And the pain doesn’t stop there; Cassava keeps The Countess’s face submerged in Cake and starts swivelling her hips like a belly dancer on cocaine, guiding Debra through an intricate, high-speed tour of the ass snared 500, 000 subscribers. The humiliating, suffocating Booty Pop(Cassava abhors the term stinkface) also grinds the back of Sugerman’s skull against the side of the steps, moulded with a rough texture to ensure extra grip on boot soles to prevent slip and falls. Each swing of Onika’s back porch wrenches muffled, horrible screams that pleasingly vibrate The Superfan’s nethers(Hip attack 95). Over the pitiful wails of her opponent, Cassava condemns the self-centred Southerner over her wails, still irritated over Debra’s slight to her idols.
"If you're going to talk trash about the woman with the greatest mind and greatest boobs in history, you better be ready for the consequences! And to disrespect Queen Kylie is grounds to be put on the injury list!"
Cassava thrusts back to booty bop Debra against the steps one last time before she takes a step away, freeing the candy peddler’s red, greasy face and letting her take in greedy breaths. Tears flow freely down Debra’s face as she reaches back and gingerly touches the back of her head, the scalp rubbed raw by the coarse steel. Cassava stands in front of the beleaguered blonde and takes the legholes of her misaligned short-shorts by the edge, pulling them out with deliberate slowness and letting them snap back into place. A message to Debra and anyone else who thinks they can shake their ass in front of The BMD.
“If you’re done being a bytch,” Cassava pulls the softly crying Debra up by the hair. “I’ll stop kicking your ass, and we’ll de-escalate to a regular match okay? Good.”
She shoves the whimpering Countess back into the ring then lifts herself onto the apron and stands up. Cassava wipes a little sweat from her face and releases a breath, “Whewww… went to a dark place for a bit there. Now let’s get back to it!” Cassava brushes past her drastic personality shift and resumes her bubbly standard. Wanting to bring the mood back up after going ham on the rude former mascot, The Superfan pauses after stepping over the second rope and bending under the top. With a grin, Cassava gives some slow, sexy gyrations of her hips that get the Floridians hooting and whistling for a slice of cake. Now feeling much better, Cassava fully steps into the ring- “Ow!”
Debra surges off the mat like a snake waiting, snatches Onika by her two-tone coif and pulls her into a Roll Up! The Superfan finds her ankles by her ears with Debra on her sneakers leaning with all her weight on Onika’s legs.
Ref. Reginald springs into action and throws himself to the canvas, slapping “One!” As he raises his large hand he notices the hefty handful of Onika’s shorts Sugerman’s pulling on, exposing a big amount of Cassava’s butt. The alpha zebra immediately goes back to standing and points at the offence, “Miss Sugerman, release Miss Onika at once!”
Debra ignores the braying of the bestriped man and does her damndest to keep the Roll Up intact, she’s out of ideas and running on a pure, desperate need to slow things down and keep this crazy stalker from going nuts again. Reginald keeps trying to get the obstinate rulebreaker to cease and desist, “Miss Sugerman! Miss Sugerman let go now, or I will disqualify you!”
Not wanting to end a match on a PPV with a DQ, Bethany's firm voice echoes in the referee’s earpiece, "Just slap her hand!" His face grimaces at the thought of that action, but there’s no time to dither; Reginald flattens his hand into a paddle and whips it down on- Debra's arm slithers away at the last moment, so Onika's bottom takes the full brunt of Reginald's palm. Rippling her flesh with a Crack!
"Ow!"
Cassava teeters onto her side holding her brazed buns and looking at Ref. Worthington in wide eyed open mouthed shock. "What the heck!" The bewildered British man sputters something between a defence and an apology, "I-I-I well-I, my apologies! Ms.Christian said-!"
Cassava rises to her feet still gripping her cheeks and speaking quickly with intense energy. Reginald couldn't tell if she was angry or excited, "If this is something you wanna explore it’s gotta be in private and we gotta go over safe words and-”
A hand clutches Cassava’s shoulder and spins her away from her potential new bull to face an infuriated Sugerman who wraps her hands around The Superfan’s neck in a choke!
“You think you can show me up you-!”
Cassava drops into a deep crouch but she’s not buckling from the choke; she’s using those thicc, powerful stems to jump into the air. The FAWNatics cheer in amazement mistakenly thinking Sugerman’s going for a Powerbomb; instead, Cassava twists out of Debra’s grasp to face away from her as she shoots her legs back and wraps them tight around Debra’s ribs. The polished Onika swings herself between Sugerman’s legs and upends the ex-mascot onto her back. Debra tries to yell “Noo!” but gets cut off by Onika’s prodigious phatty pancaking her tits and turning Debra’s voice hoarse.
WHEELBARROW ROLL UP
youtu.be/J8XBJ9adAvE?t=69
Referee Worthington dives for the count as Cassava educates her opponent, “People think about my ass so much they forget I have skillz!”
ONE!!
TWO!!
THREE!!!
Cassava has won this battle of medias! She stands up as soon as she hears the chime of bell, freeing Debra to roll over to a side and look at the ref in shock. As the official confirms her loss, the winner of the match heads to the nearest corner, clmibs to the middle rope and saultes her fans, “WOOO! Never doubt the booty battler!”
Cassava leaps back to the ring floor to see Sugerman on her feet with her head lowered and hands on her hips. Cassava breathes through her nose and mulls over the pros and cons of another person gunning for her failure. Not liking the mat and not wanting another headache, she approaches Sugerman, "Hey, great match. Could we move past all the bullshit and start over? We don't need-"
Debra cuts her off with a shove, almost bowling over the startled victress. She grabs Cassava by her white tank and pulls her close; the Candy Countess's pretty features is twisted with anger as she berates Cassava with a voice that is noticeably devoid of an accent.
"You got lucky with a cheap Roll-up, you punk! We do this again and I'll-"
Smack!
Cassava swivels Sugerman's head and torso with the bytchiest of bytch slaps. The blonde twists back; Debra’s angry expression changes into the how-could-you? shock of someone who's just been slapped, complete with a pink handprint tattooing her cheek. She reels back a hand for a return volley and doubles over with a comical "Guuah!" When Cassava pulls her by the hair into a Broadside Kneelift.
"I was trying to bury this petty shit, but you just had to be a bitch, didn't you!"
The Superfan drops down and slips her head between Debra's legs while grabbing the blonde above the knees. Cassava straightens up, draping her defeated opponent down her back, "If you don't like losing, stop peacocking and hit the gym!"
The struggling Southerner bleats out "N-no!" Before Onika plummets onto her haunches, spiking Debra's crown into the hard plywood of the ring floor.
UPSIDE DOWN CAKE
youtu.be/Dz3-M3y6xCE?t=519
Cassava releases Debra's legs, and the definitively beaten Countess slumps off her to the mat, legs straight, arms out and her snoozing face resting on a cheek. Cassava pops back up and pops a moderately sized bicep for the cameras, "Talk shit, get hit."
She turns and looks down at the finally silent Sugerman. Cassava, on principle, is not one for going 'old school' after winning, but she's not above humbling a bitch. With hands daintily placed on her hips, Cassava brings a foot to Debra's face and pinches the sleeping beauty's cute nose between her big and second toes, using it to lead Debra's face to the lights.
"You could have walked to the back under your own power with my respect.”
Those nostrils stay shut till the breathing restriction uncomfortably rouses Debra. She groans and whimpers as the grip tightens and Cassava in a literal sense, guides her by the nose, shaking her head back and forth till Debra is cognizant enough to learn her lesson. When she tries to mumble something Cassava forces her toes between the crushed Countess’ lips.
“Now you’re getting carried back with my foot sweat in your mouth; you better learn from this.”
With the battle between chocolate cake and vanilla loaf now decided, the ring crew walks down to prepare for the next match.