Post by hawkeye on Jun 11, 2020 0:58:18 GMT
“Ladies and gentlemen, it is now time for our Main Event of the evening!” the Announcer called over the growing rumble of the crowd. “The following contest is scheduled for one fall with a sixty minute time limit and it is for the FAWN World Championship! Introducing first, she is the challenger, hailing from the Red Hook Section of Brooklyn New York, she weighs one hundred and twenty five pounds and stands at five feet five inches tall. She is the Queen of the Facebusters Tribe, the Happy Anarchist, the Glad Bomber and the Smiling Knight, she is MADDY CRANE!”
MADDY CRANE:
The capacity crowd gathered for Mayhem answered with a cacophonous roar, one that grew even louder when Shinedown’s ‘Cut the Cord’ rose over the din. Mads appeared immediately thereafter, the challenger in no mood to stand around and yak when there was only one more obstacle between herself and FAWN’s biggest prize. Which isn’t to say that Crane ignored the fan-base she’d built over a decade of hard work. Indeed she paused atop the ramp long enough to raise the ‘MC’ sigil *and* strap an invisible belt around her waist. Then she was on the move, the Sultana of Slapstick making a beeline for the squared circle. For tonight’s show closing appearance the wiry redhead sported a simple black sports bra top and matching bikini bottoms crisscrossed with thin white belts worn bandolier style while her boots and pads were done in a matching matte black. And as per tradition, the seat of her trunks featured a pithy observation with regards to this evening’s opponent:
YOUR FACE HERE, ASK ME HOW!
Increasing her pace as she approached the foot of the ramp, Maddy circled the ring to bump a few more fists, then stomped up the steps and hopped over the ropes. Once inside she crossed the canvas to the edge facing the hard camera and climbed onto the second strand. Gaze turned to the camera on the floor, Mads adopted her best newscaster voice to say, “This is Maddy Crane, with tonight’s ‘News from the not too distant Future. FAWN’s long, incoherent nightmare finally came to an end this evening when one plucky ginger with a penchant for sass finally stood up to the rampaging, delusional leather fetishist that up until recently, dared call herself the World Champion. I’m here on the scene with Maddy Crane, the badass who put a stop to all of the spitting and close talking. Maddy, anything to say to the people watching from earlier tonight? Why yes, Maddy. I’d just like to tell everyone to strap in and hold on tight because I’m gonna whoop that crazy ass.” Crane tipped the crowd a salute, hopped off the ropes and made her way to the opposite corner where Nick Castle could check her pads and boots and she could keep a careful eye on the stage.
From lunatics to stand-up comedians. Was the FAWN roster so completely lacking suitable companions to perfection? Certainly none could beat her purity of excellence, but could Christian not find someone to at least compete with it? Such were the questions that plagued the Ultimate Image as she waited for the signal to grace the Wanadreams with her presence and the assembled were so graced when O Fortuna echoed through the arena portending the immaculate arrival.
O FORTUNA:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=EJC-_j3SnXk
The jeers of the FAWNatics rose to a crescendo along with the stirring music when the industry icon appeared, moving to center stage, taking the spotlight figuratively and literally. The crowd spewed their venom and Lisa looked upon them with utter disdain, every single one jealous of her perfection instead of celebrating it.
LISA DREAM:
Having sent a chill down the spine of Dreamophile and Dreamophobe alike, Lisa lowered her gaze upon herself, there the further proof of her flawless ability wrapped around her midriff, the FAWN World Championship belt evidence of excellence even the most obtuse could not avoid or deny.
Satisfied with her bask, The Dream began her champion’s promenade, Lisa moving gracefully down the ramp and aisle, then ascending the ring steps with all the surety of someone who’s known from birth she’s without a single shortcoming.
Lisa halted and took a long look around the unfriendly confines before sticking a leather-clad leg through and follows the cowskin-covered limb into the battleground.
The Luscious One moved to the middle as her music faded, unfastened her belt, and raised it high, staring a hole through her challenger. She had a microphone in her opposite hand.
“Tonight. The joke teller becomes the joke. Enjoy your moment of relevance, playing your part in adding to my legend.”
Lisa let the microphone slip from her fingers and CLUNK against the canvas.
Dream was clad in her iconic, skin-tight, black leather; Lisa wearing her customary sleeveless vest, cut to give her pert bosom room to breathe but otherwise covering her alabaster tummy, only a slight rim of skin showing. Her long, black cowhide pants reached down to her black boots, the Dreamophiles, again frustrated at not being able to view the flawless, alabaster stems of the Personification of Perfection. A series of leather ‘strings’ cobweb across her back to keep the vest in place, though they also left a considerable portion of her ivory back in view.
Lisa gazed at Crane with utter contempt and the Announcer used the lull to declare the arrival of the title holder.
“And introducing her opponent, from New York, New York, standing five feet six inches tall and weighing in at one hundred and seventeen pounds, the Ultimate Image of Human Perfection… and YOUR FAWN WORLD CHAMPION…LISA DREAM!”
The beautiful dark-haired Dream handed her belt to Castle who brought it to an attendant for safekeeping. Moving to her corner, the “sane” megalomaniac version of The Dream stretched both sets of limbs, keeping a watchful set of brown pools on Maddy, Lisa ignoring the jeers and leers of the jealous Wannadreams.
Mads was out of her corner with the sound of bell, the redhead clearly eager to get at the Personification of Perfection. She’d been robbed of FAWN’s big belt in her first World Title opportunity, she didn’t intend for history to repeat itself. Picking up speed as she passed the center of the ring, Crane was perhaps half a heartbeat from lunging at The Dream when Lisa casually dipped her upper body through the gap between the top and middle rope. “Really Lis, already?” Maddy asked, her tone slightly mocking. “Usually you don’t go for the ropes until I’ve dropped you on your face three or four times.”
“I have no memory of any such altercation.” Lisa replied without withdrawing from the strands. “If my memory serves, and it does, because it’s perfect, our encounters end with my hand raised and you looking at the lights.”
“Enough stalling, Lisa.” Castle interjected before the challenger could offer a rebuttal. “Take it out of the ropes and get at her.”
“Oh, that’s ok, Nick.” Crane’s spoke to the referee, though her eyes didn’t leave Lisa. “You can give her another minute. I think that prescription cocktail that keeps her brain from frying is working overtime trying to suppress the memory of our last match… you know, the one where I sat on her face for the one, two, three?”
“SLANDER!” Lisa pulled clear of the ropes and made straight for her antagonist, the Ultimate Image rearing back with her right hand for a-- Maddy raised her arms overhead in a droopy-wristed ‘Y’ and pushed up on the ball of her right foot while her left knee rose to waist level. Just the threat of a Crane Kick sent The Dream backpedaling to start, the leather-clad practically throwing herself against the turnbuckles to keep clear of her foe’s foot.
The FAWNatics chuckled, but Maddy did not, she only held the pose for a few more seconds, then settled down and ceded a few steps so the champion couldn’t complain to Castle. “Don’t look so scared, Lis.” Crane murmured over the buzz of the crowd. “I have no interest in taking your pants. All I want is your shiny gold belt.”
“It’ll never be yours, Wannadream.” Lisa answered in a sibilant hiss. “Tonight your only prize is a well deserved comeuppance for daring to put those impertinent cheeks upon my perfect visage.”
Maddy bit her bottom lip in a coy smile, then raised her left hand and waggled her fingers at the brunette. “I knew you remembered. That little whimper against my butt was--”
CRACK!
Dream pushed off the buckles, reared back and clouted Crane’s cheek with a Bytch Slap that swiveled her head to one side. “Your receipt has just come due, you motor-mouthed whelp.” she hissed in Mads’ ear. “And I mean to collect with CRIPPLING inter--”
Maddy’s head snapped back, putting her nose to nose with the Reflection of Perfection. “My hand’s still up there, champ. You want to make me pay? Lock up and prove it.”
The demand was fresh off her lips when The Dream obliged, Lisa joining her right to Maddy’s left. Their fingers laced and started to squeeze even though the Test was only half done. “You asked for this, Crane.” Dream growled. “Remember that when you’re on your imperfect knees, bleeding and begging for mercy. You ASKED for this.” She raised her left hand and Crane immediately mirrored her, brunette and redhead driving in mouth on shoulder in an effort to control the Test of Strength.
“I remember, Lis. Just like I remember how you needed Celia and the Sisters to beat me the first two times. Now it’s just you and your batshyt crazy roommate. And two against one is odds I can hanNGH!”
Lisa jerked her head to the right, driving it against the other wrestler’s temple. Maddy answered in kind and soon enough champ and challenger were getting after the other with an exchange of miniature Headbutts. “Yammer about the odds all you like, Wannadream.” Lisa hissed. “It doesn’t change the fact that failure has soaked through every fiber of your being. The sad truth is, every bit of success you’ve ever achieved only ensures you’ll make a more attractive pedestal for my perfect bootSUUGGGHH!”
Maddy drew back from the encroaching brunette for the sole purpose of thumping her chest against Lisa’s. T’was no collision of tank-top terrors true, yet The Dream still stumbled back a couple steps and Crane stayed close, the redhead damned near glued to her immaculate adversary. “You should know better than to bullshyt a bullshytter, Dream.” Challenger and champion were nose to nose now, neither willing to do so much as blink in the face of such brazen, incendiary eye contact. “The record book may show you as two-time World Champion, but the whole locker room knows you only won the first by yourself. Celia’s monster is the real FAWN champ and you’re not fit to carry Sue Burlingame’s bagSSOOOFFFFHHHH!”
The Ultimate Image of Infuriated Indignation plowed a Kneelift into the washboard of Maddy’s tummy, then pivoted on her left foot so she could double pump the leather-sheathed broadside of her right thigh across those startled abdominals! Crane’s legs shimmied ominously before they gave way entirely, their rapid descent helped along by The Dream, who went up on her tiptoes and pushed the redhead’s hands back over her own wrists. It was more a violation of etiquette than an actual breach of the rules, thus explaining why Nick Castle did nothing even in the face of overwhelming boos from the Mayhem throng.
Still on tiptoe after forcing Crane to genuflect before Perfection, Lisa bounced in place to exacerbate the strain on those wrists. “Oh, don’t waste your breath, Wannadreams!” she sneered at the crowd. “Or MY oxygen, for that matter! This yippy little toe rag is exactly where she belongs and if you could stop distracting me for five seconds, I could dispose of her as quickly and efficiently as possible!” Shifting her gaze to the kneeling redhead, Lisa gnashed Maddy’s fingers between her knuckles and continued to bear down on those aching wrists. “Ask her!” Lisa barked at Castle after several more seconds. “If the quit oozing from her pores is any indication, she’s finished!”
The Senior Official was almost certain this wasn’t true, yet he wasn’t brave enough (at least not anymore) to call out Lisa’s bombast unless it was absolutely crucial. Since it wasn’t he went to one knee and said, “How you doing, Maddy? Need me to call for the bell?”
“Call the Fashion Police instead, Nick.” Crane grimaced. “I think they’ve got some outstanding warrants on these tacky ass pleather paMMMRRHHHH!”
Dream set her feet flat and thrust her tummy forward, all the better to swipe it back and forth against Maddy’s mug! “Better idea. I’ll call Code Enforcement to deal with that dumpster fire in your mouth. How does that sound, Wannadr--”
Lisa’s question was cut off behind the ‘clack’ of her teeth coming together, the lithesome brunette suddenly much more concerned with Maddy’s position now that the challenger was pushing off her knees. The Waking Nightmare didn’t make it easy, but Crane never eased up for a second and sooner than later they were back to the positions they’d occupied prior to Dream’s Kneelif-- “OOOOWWWWW!”
Lisa shouted and went up on tiptoes, only now it was because Maddy drew their tethered hands from midnight to six and forced the brunette’s wrists in the direction of her forearms like they were playing a high stakes version of the old bad schoolyard masterpiece, Mercy.
“I got a better idea, Lisa sweetie. Why don’t you try to shut my mouth yourself? Or call out to the real champ, see if she can show up in time to keep you from losing HER Title.”
Lisa hated the stinging pain in her hands, she hated the notion of ‘Red Lisa’ as an individual unto herself even more. “There is NO Red Lisa.” she hissed. “There is only The Dream and The Dream will not be denied!”
Lisa sent her head flashing forward, butting Crane in the bridge of the nose. Maddy’s head flopped back, neck loosened considerably by the blow. Some corpuscles started to leak from one of the challenger’s nostrils.
“Who’s Red?” Lisa sneered.
Maddy’s head not only recovered its stability but the challenger’s eyes gained a steely focus, her grips on Lisa’s fingers tightening, drawing a mewl of pain before Maddy delivered a butt of her own to Dream’s braincase.
Payback sent a released Lisa staggering away, holding her nose with one hand and begging off with the other. Soon, The Dream’s back was pressed tight into a corner, nowhere else to retreat.
“Not the perfect comedian, I take it,” Maddy informed. “It’s OK, Lis. I’m not much for joking tonight.”
Lisa covered high, bringing her forearms up to cover her flawless features and Crane drove a stiff combo into the thin rim of ivory skin on the waistline of the champ. With the Ultimate Image’s defenses lowering, Crane worked Lisa’s jaw, swabbing Dream’s head from side to side with her fisticuffery. With Dream in a stupor after Crane’s Sugar Ray impression, Maddy lifted her right elbow high and crowned the top of Lisa’s skull with an elbow of the Bionic variety, dropping a battered Lisa to her haunches.
Maddy turned away from the penitent Lisa, letting her cheeks hover a few inches from the glassy-eyed Dream.
“Does she want seconds, Wannadreams?!” Maddy shouted.
The FAWNatics overwhelming response was a hearty ‘YES’ and Mads obliged, stuffing her pert backside into Lisa’s mug, filling the Dream’s face with her taut little booty.
“Deja-vous all over again,” a beaming Crane chuckled, mopping her ass across the buried features of a squirming Dream. Pushing her palms against Maddy’s rump, a sputtering Lisa found enough room to rise.
“How daruuuh…”
The legend is cut off with a European Uppercut clattering against the underside of Lisa’s mandible. The challenger shoved a rattled Lisa past, The Dream stumbling to the middle of the ring but remaining upright, if bent over, trying to recover her bearings. Crane took to her nest at the top of the corner, turning to face her stalled target. Taking flight, it becomes ever more clear, Maddy’s on a mission. Crane finished off her volley with a brutal Snark Attack, POUNDING Lisa in the posterior.
SNARK ATTACK @ 00:10
www.youtube.com/watch?v=QzQSeKycYDY
Dream waddled forward from the very personal attack, knees knocking, the Dreamophobes enjoying every second of her discomfort. She leaned her forehead into the top buckle, Maddy watching with bemusement.
“I know you’re in there somewhere, Red,” she shouted at Dream. “Come out and play. I want to beat the REAL champ.”
Maddy shrugged when Lisa only managed to massage her leather-bound butt and groan incoherently.
“I get it,” Maddy responds. “Not embarrassing enough. Let’s see what else we can do.”
Racing in from mid-ring, Maddy RAMMED a raised knee between the cheeks of the Dream, straightening up the flawless brunette then pressing against the champ’s back, sandwiching her in tight and nibbling on The Dream’s ear before whispering in it.
“Now that’s classical music,” Maddy informed. “Not some lame ass symphony. Who plays the bongos for a symphony anyway?”
Maddy roughly turned Lisa to face her and scooped under the leather-encased thighs of the title holder. She launched a wincing Dream to a seat on the top, the landing drawing another chirp from the pained Lisa. Maddy ascended to the middle cables, pulling Dream to a stance in front of her. Crane underhooks both arms of the World Champ, locking her fingers in the small of Lisa’s back.
“Let’s see how a Dream dies,” Crane growled with not a hint of mirth as she powered Lisa out of the corner, flinging her with a Double Underhook Suplex from the top.
AVALANCHE DOUBLE UNDERHOOK SUPLEX:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=K-j49q5yI0g
Lisa THWUMPED in a spine-first collision with the canvas halfway across the ring, The Dream bouncing several inches into the air from the ferocity of the impact then spreading out in a motionless starfish, the fight apparently pounded out of perfection. A grimacing Crane ignored her own pained vertebrae and crawls to the waylaid brunette, dropping across her in a lateral press for the…
ONE…
TWO…
Lisa kicked free in a spasm that left her on a hip and elbow, reaching to massage the base of her backbone with a free hand. A risen Maddy collected the readymade handle at the wrist and tugged Dream to her feet. Sliding next to the reeling Lisa, Crane locked near arms with her foe.
“There’s only so long you’ve got, Red.”
Maddy pivoted and scooped her free arm behind Lisa’s near knee, lifting the joint so it settled behind the Mirthmaker’s neck.
“Before this has-been gives away your gold!”
With Dream situated on one stem, Maddy launched Lisa into a less than graceful, partial back-flip, the challenger delivering Dream face and chest-first to the deck, busting the brunette.
BACKDROP FLIP FACEBUSTER:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=TIw1HNXKvjA
Lisa bounced to a three-point stance on her knees and forehead, the champ hugging her aching chest before collapsing onto her side, the concussive blow turning her lights off as a rampaging Maddy shoved Dream to her back, climbing aboard in a crossbody for the…
ONE…
TWO…
THRNOOOO!
The Ultimate Image barely shifted a shoulder up, weakly enough Crane checked with Castle. He held his thumb and forefinger a few inches apart.
“There’s a joke there,” Maddy said, smiling at the man’s digits, “but this is a family crowd. A demented family if they’re coming to FAWN. But still…a family.”
While Crane had her fun with the organization’s lead referee, Dream rolled to hands and knees but seemed stuck there in recovery mode, trying to blink some senses into place with her fluttering lids. The Princess of the Punchline dove on her back in MMA mode.
She controlled her foe then rolled to her back, bringing The Dream with her. The champ’s back ends in Maddy’s lap. Quickly, Crane grapevined her foe’s legs around the leather-clad lovelies of the title holder, then drew her left arm across Lisa’s throat, trying to secure a Rear Naked Choke on the faltering Lisa.
But before the redhead could lock the noose tight with her opposite arm, the cracking Ultimate Image leaned chin to chest then threw her head back, SMACKING her skull into Maddy’s chin. The Dream rolled clear of the loosened limbs of her challenger, pushing to hands and knees as a dazed Crane flexed her jacked jaw.
Eyes locked on Lisa even as she covered the bottom half of her face with one hand, Maddy allowed a few more seconds to catch her bearings, then knee walked over to the penitent Perfectionist and caught a double handful of hair. “Up, Lisa.” Crane ordered as she began to rise. “I said UPNGH!”
Set on one knee, The Dream balled both hands into fists and fired a left-right-left combination into the challenger’s trim tummy. “Don’t order me around, Wannadream.” Lisa barked. “Don’t even consider OOFFH!”
Seeing that the brunette was on her way to verticality, Mads relinquished the hair-holds and fired off some snappy body shots of her own. “I’ll do whatever the hell I wanna do, Lis. History shows you can’t do a damned thing about NNNGGGHH!”
FAWN’s World Champion bared her teeth, staggered back a step and CRAAACKED a single scintillating Knife-Edge Chop across the other New Yorker’s chest. “That so, Wannadream? It seems you need a reminder of your position within the perfect order of thi--”
Crane split the air with a Chop of her own, unfortunately The Dream spun aside to evade the blow and take up residence on her opponent’s six. Her window was a short one, but lest you forget, Lisa was perfect which was why she made the most of it by catching a double handful of crimson locks and yanking Mads backward into a quick Headbutt that landed flush against the nape of her neck! The Sultana of Slapstick flailed without losing her footing, so Lisa went up on tiptoe and dropped to one knee while the back of Maddy’s neck was still snugged tight against the curve of her forehead. The result was a sort of Inverted Jawbreaker or possibly a Kneeling Neckbreaker. Whatever you called it, the move wrenched Crane’s neck at an awkward angle and sent her stumbling away from the champion with both arms swaddling her buzzing sk-- Lisa reached out, caught her foe’s waistband in an overhand grip and yanked her in for another Headbutt, this one landing firmly in the small of Maddy’s back!
“What’s wrong, Wannadream?” The Dream sneered over Crane’s groan of protest. “The crushing weight of your inadequacies starting to slow you down?” Mads’ reply didn’t get beyond the firs syllable before Lisa raised both hands overhead and SLAPPED ‘em down between the redhead’s shoulders! Movement already slowed, the Princess of the Punchline effectively froze in place, offering Lisa ample opportunity to sidle ‘round to the front.
“You’re going to learn to keep my name out of your mouth, Wannadream.” the Ultimate Image of Painful Prognostication explained in the midst of catching Crane’s chin in both hands. “Even if it means wiring your damned jaw shut.”
Maddy answered with a few stunned punches to those perfect flanks, ineffectual shots that Lisa shook off en route to twisting the both of ‘em into a back to back configuration with the challenger’s head wrenched backward over the point of Lisa’s right shoulder. The crowd was still analyzing this arrangement when The Dream kicked both feet forward and dropped to her tush, which in turn THWHUNKED Maddy’s aching skull against her shoulder! The Hangman’s Neckbreaker left Crane in a slumped seat until a dismissive nudge from Lisa turned her onto her belly.
HANGMAN'S NECKBREAKER:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=27cYbPg4pcY
“That you, of all Wannadreams would dare to undermine my validity as champion,” The Dream shook her head in disgust, “just serves to illustrate what sort of a sick joke you are, Crane.”
“Yuh… you got it all wrong, Lis.” Maddy braced her forehead and palms against the canvas so she could power to all fours. “I don’t care about your validity as champion… I just think you’re a really shitty human beiNNOOOFFFHHH!”
Lisa rushed forward and buried a savage punt in the redhead’s flanks, Maddy folding up around the encroaching footwear even as it lifted her off the canvas and sent her tumbling onto her back. “SHUT YOUR MOUTH, WANNADREAM!” Lisa bellowed down at the rasping redhead. “I AM A CHAMPION, YOU’RE A COCKROACH!” She stepped forward, raised her right leg and stomped that heel deep into the challenger’s navel. “I AM A LEGEND, YOU’RE NOTHING BUT TRASH!” Maddy gurgled, rolled over onto her belly, cried out in sharp anguish when Lisa stamped on the small of her back! With Crane pinned beneath her boot, The Dream leaned in and grrrrrrrrrround her heel against the wailing wrestler’s vertebrae. Over this commotion, she explained, “I am perfection and you? You’re a punchline.”
Another hard stomp put Maddy on her back once more, so the Ultimate Image of Targeted Trampling turned ‘round and stalked to the far side of the ring, where she dipped through the ropes to take a position on the apron. Grabbing the top rope in both hands, Lisa leaned back and vaulted onto the strands just to fly even higher, the leather-clad lovely seeming to disappear in the lights before she dropped outta the sky to THWHUMP down back-first across the challenger’s chest with a ‘Nightmarish’ Springboard Senton.
Far from done despite the perfect landing, Lisa rolled through, sprinted forward and hopped onto the second rope without missing a beat. First came the nightmare, then came the Dream, or rather a Dreamysault, Lisa’s vaunted midsection THWHAMMING down atop her opponent’s chest! Maddy’s far leg popped into the air so The Dream caught it in a perfect Cradle and leaned all her weight in across Crane’s shoulders while Castle and the capacity crowd counted off…
NIGHTMARE SENTON & DREAMYSAULT:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=bEPLqSMOhSg
ONE…
TWO…
THRNOOOO!
The Queen of the Facebusters kicked free about half a second before three, much to the irritation of FAWN’s Waking Nightmare. “What are you thinking, Castle?” she snapped at the Senior Official. “Even an open mic night hack like this one knows you have to end a joke before it gets old.”
Nick offered her a shrug the champ found entirely too insolent. “Sorry Lisa, guess this one’s got a few more laughs in her. You wanna bring the house down? Be funnier.”
Lisa’s eyes narrowed to dark slots. “Trust me, idiot. I’m hilarious. And I’ll leave you in stitches if it suits me.”
Returning her attention to Crane when Castle scurried to a safe distance, The Dream shoved Maddy onto her stomach, grabbed hold of her right wrist and angled that arm across her lower back so Lisa could pin it in place with her right knee. From there she claimed the other New Yorker’s left wrist and elbow, tugging Maddy’s arm up and back at a sharp angle. “Ready to accept your place in my shadow, alongside the rest of the Wannadreams?” Lisa chided. “Or shall I continue to humiliate you?”
“Do your worst, beeyotch.” Maddy grunted. “The only embarrassment here is your attempt at trash talkKEERRRGGGHH!”
The Ultimate Image abruptly folded Crane’s left arm across her lower back and shifted her hands so she could control both of the prone New Yorker’s wrists. Standing up without releasing her hold, Lisa pivoted a quarter circle and stepped over Mads’ frame to plant her boots near the redhead’s right shoulder and hip. Then she dropped to her butt, landing with her right leg slung across Maddy’s lower back and her left leg bearing down on the nape of Crane’s neck. Gripping her right wrist in her left hand for extra torque, The Dream clamped down on Maddy’s left wrist and CRAAAAAAAANKED up on a hellaciously perfect variation on the Kimura!
DREAM THERAPY:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=3D0U5u8597o
“AAAAAAAHHHHHHHH F*CK!” Crane shrieked as Lisa tried to add several elbow bends to her left arm.
“What do you say, Mads?” Castle asked. “Need me to call for the bell?”
“NO!” the Smiling Knight shook her head as best she could. “No, just back up and EERRRRRRHHHHHH!”
“Don’t be foolish, Wannadream.” Lisa cooed. “This idiot’s not good for much, but I’m certain he’s got the EMT’s on speed dial. Let him help you.”
Dream raised her right leg and slammed her heel into the back of Maddy’s skull a half dozen times before returning her attention to her therapy.
“Do you want to reconsider?” Lisa asked, the arrogance in her voice growing but also the impatience when the madcap Maddy refused to give in.
Flustered by her lack of perfection in forcing FAWN’s court jester to capitulate, Dream unknotted herself from the captured Crane and hopped to her feet, furious at her imperfect foe’s lack of compliance.
Determined to make a point with the Dreamophobes and Dreamophiles alike, Lisa sank her ruby-tipped nails into the auburn locks of Crane and RIPPED Maddy to her feet, only to gut Mads with a Toe Kick to her flat, ivory abdomen. Forced to double at the waist, her dark eyes bulging as she tried to draw in air, Maddy could do little to stop the rampaging Dream when she pulled Crane’s lowered head forward, between her leather-encased lower limbs.
Lisa clamped down with the Standing Headscissors and a buzz grew as a beaming Dream raised her right hand high, forming it into a familiar paddle. Dream looked at her instrument with pride and joy before bringing it down in an echoing SWAT across Maddy’s derriere, Crane flinching from the stinging rebuke. But Lisa was no one-note musician and, despite the wriggling of her foe, Lisa blistered Maddy’s backside with a Bittersweet Symphony that drew jeers from the Wannadreams and a sneering smirk of satisfaction from the World Champion.
With one final two-handed crescendo, Lisa ended her masterful musical montage and dismounted Crane, allowing Maddy to limp away, both hands glued to her bum, trying to cool the fire below. Concentration on the whereabouts of The Dream lacking, Crane wandered to center stage, still doubled as she fanned her tanned cheeks.
A looming Lisa rambled into the ropes and rebounded, sprinting at Crane from her left flank. She drew a looping right arm overhead and DOWN across the back of Maddy’s neck, the clueless Crane’s face PLANTED into the deck, making the impact a double-play to Maddy’s braincase, Lisa’s signature Dreamsicle an emphatic second exclamation point in a row.
Lisa skidded to a stop after the violent crashing impact. She dropped to her knees next to the demolished challenger and shoved Maddy to her back, climbing aboard in a lateral press to dash the hopes of the Wannadreams once and for all with the…
ONE…
TWO…
Maddy threw a shoulder up, pushing Lisa to her haunches. Showing a hint of hyperventilation, Lisa had Castle backing up even before the champ demanded to know what happened during Nick’s grade school career that kept him from being able to reach ‘THREE’. To his credit, Castle insisted on his decision and Lisa turned her laser-like gaze back to the rising Maddy, Crane having made it to all fours.
“There’s a reason I’m sublime and you’re ridiculous,” Lisa growled, eyes narrowing to slits a she reached the challenger and pulled Maddy to her knees. “AnDDUHHHH!”
Maddy drove a fist into the Lisa’s flawless tummy, backing her up a step. The Dream came back but ate another and another, Crane rising as Dream’s on the backpedal, suddenly looking vulnerable. In disbelief Crane could mount a comeback, The Dream surged toward the redhead.
Crane pivoted and PLANTED a swinging elbow between the eyes of the Immaculate One, jarring The Dream, Lisa looking lost. Maddy grabbed a wrist and spun next to the Ultimate Image, ending in a stance side by side with the title holder, both facing in the same direction. She wrapped her near arm around the neck of The Dream, leaned back, then threw her frame forward, SPIKING Lisa’s perfect puss into the thinly-sheathed plywood with a Bad Joke.
BAD JOKE:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=6AQptWZ0NtY
The force of the reverse Russian Leg Sweep rocked The Dream, the brunette absently flopping to her back. Maddy dove across the splayed Lisa and the crowd came to its feet for the ultimate punchline as Castle slapped the mat for the…
ONE…
TWO…
THRNOOO!
Unwilling for perfection to end, something deep inside the Ultimate Image of Human Perfection coerced Lisa’s body to spasm and get her shoulders off the canvas in the nick of time. Slopping to her side, eyes clouded, The Dream’s daze evident, the champ couldn’t manage more and it became Maddy’s job to tug her foe the rest of the way to a rubber-legged vertical.
As both women reached their feet, one less willingly, The Dream broke free from Crane’s grip. The champ fashioned her right index and middle fingers into a fork to poke the peepers of the Mistress of Mirth, but Crane’s seen some Stooges in her day. She got a knife-edge up to block, inserting it between the fingers to prevent Dream’s attempt to blind her.
With Lisa’s shortcut upended, Maddy raised a pointed elbow high and THUMPED the bionic joint into The Dream’s forehead, Lisa driven to her knees from the concussive contact, her lids fluttering over glassy pools.
As the champ tried to regain her faculties, Maddy rose on one stem, prompting an ovation from the FAWNatics, Crane going all Mister Miyagi, setting up for her infamous Crane Kick then sending it ripping through the air in front of her when Lisa started to ascend. The boot SLAMMED into perfection just beneath the point of Lisa’s chin and lifted The Dream’s soles from the canvas, Lisa flying to a flattened starfish, out cold from Maddy’s specialty.
But Crane didn’t go for the pin. Instead, she jogged to the most distant corner before spinning and racing at the splayed Dream. She leapt over the brunette, bunny-hopping to the middle ropes while grabbing the top. From that vantage, the challenger sent her legs up and back as she vaulted out of the corner and into a rib-crushing Reverse Splash.
REVERSE SPLASH:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=UdkKP61sVuc
The ring-rattling impact DESTROYED what’s left of The Dream and a delighted crowd reveled as Maddy hooked a leg and rolls Lisa into a cradled ball for the…
ONE…
TWO…
THRNOOOO!
Lisa didn’t kick out because she didn’t have to, the cagey World Champion simply reached out and grabbed hold of the bottom rope, forcing Castle to break the count of his own accord.
“Clever girl.” Crane grunted after she’d leaned back on her haunches to catch a couple deep breaths. “Too bad this T-Wrecks Your Shyt is still gonna eat you the hell up!”
“Uuuuhhh… open that mouth any wider and you’re likely to fall in, WannadreAAARRRHHH!”
The Dream yowled in pain and outrage when Mads buried both hands in her hair and swiftly BWUUUNGED her forehead offa the top turnbuckle. Lisa rebounded away from the impact and that was fine with the challenger, as she used it to swing around in a half circle before sprinting to the opposite corner with The Dream still in tow. Prepared for an emphatic albeit traditional second serving of turnbuckle smash, the FAWNatics ‘ooooooohhhhed!’ in surprise because Crane leapt over the ropes to land on the apron while forcefully driving Lisa’s forehead into the canvas-sheathed steel!
Lisa’s noggin whipped back and she staggered into the center of the ring, the heel of one hand pressed between her eyes. As for the Sultana of Slapstick, she hurried to the middle of the apron to better line up with the reeling champion. Taking the top rope in both hands, Mads launched herself up and over, the redhead’s legs spread in a wide ‘V’ to ensure the most comfortable landing even as she caught hold of Lisa’s skull and THAWHONKED her down on that aching forehead courtesy of a beautiful Springboard Sit-Out Facebuster!
SPRINGBOARD SIT-OUT FACEBUSTER:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=h99Ww5oEwmY
The Dream did a damned fine impression of a lawn dart on impact, though the residual momentum meant she bounced out of the challenger’s reach before Crane could go for a cover. Didn’t seem to bother the Sultana though, she looked happy as ever crawling after Lisa to collect another handful of hair.
“No more running, Lis.” Maddy explained in the midst of drawing her longtime rival into a Standing Headscissors of her own. “Tonight FAWN wakes up from this bullshyt nightmare of yours.”
Lisa tried to tug free of the Scissors though her efforts came to naught when Crane butterflied her arms and wrenched them overhead in a Double Underhook. For a moment it looked like Mads might bust out a Symphony of her own, yet in the end she chose to clasp her hands and muscle the leather-clad brunette head over heels, The Dream’s toes pointed at the rafters. Lisa, flashing back to some very un-Dreamy moments in her past, shouted, “You’re not fooling anyone, Wannadream! You’ll never be Deschain, no matter how hard you WHAOOUUUUUNNNNGGGHH!”
Maddy didn’t borrow her mentor’s finish, rather she went up on tiptoe and swung Lisa forward and down while dropping to her tush to THWHAM the Ultimate Image of Breathless Bewilderment flat on her face, chest and belly with a Sit-Out Double Underhook Facebuster!
SIT-OUT DOUBLE UNDERHOOK FACEBUSTER:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=0sqfxAWN4BQ
Lisa remained facedown in the aftermath, her obvious vulnerability earning Maddy a raucous roar from the capacity crowd. The din subsided somewhat when the redhead scraped Lisa up without trying for a pin, but it came back all the louder once Crane slapped on the Double Underhook for the second time. Knees dipped slightly, Maddy sank a little deeper, then swung The Dream into the air, not upside down, but arched awkwardly over her left shoulder in what might’ve been an especially painful Backbreaker… if Maddy had chosen to bounce in place instead of launching ‘em both into a dizzying spin cycle. Once, twice, three times around they went before Mads swung the imperiled perfectionist off her perch and sat out full force, the ‘thump’ of her landing utterly overwhelmed by the resounding THAWHAAAAM of Lisa’s flawless frame putting a perfect divot in the canvas!
ELEVATED SIT-OUT DOUBLE UNDERHOOK FACEBUSTER:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=FvTuc4uqDgA
Now Crane went for her cover, the Smiling Knight shooting a Half Nelson and twisting ‘round a quarter turn to catch both of The Dream’s legs in a Back Press that pointed her butt at the lights for…
ONE…
TWO…
THRENOOOOOOOO!
Lisa twitched her way free at the last possible second, Crane’s golden dream so close to reality that Castle had to bark an order to the Timekeeper to prevent an erroneous decision.
Set on her knees beside the cratered remains of Lisa Dream, Maddy Crane raised three fingers for Nick Castle even though more than a decade in the ring told her it never worked. “C’mon Nick,” she huffed. “That was three.”
“It was as close to three as it can be without being three, Mads. Keep on her.”
The challenger did just that, catching Lisa by the ears so she could scrape, peel and pull her into a snug Front Facelock. Lowering her head just enough to sling The Dream’s near arm across her shoulders, Crane helped herself to a strong hold on Lisa’s leather waistband and muscled her skyward for a little Insult 2 InjurNO! Lisa kicked her legs wildly, the embattled champion doing anything and everything within her power to return to terra firma. Undeterred, Mads stuffed a pair of Kneelifts into the brunette’s tummy to quiet her down, then gathered her strength and-- “OOOWW BYTCH!”
The Dream couldn’t escape Crane’s grasp so she pivoted into it and STAMPED on her left foot in a bit of slapstick Maddy might’ve appreciated if she wasn’t on the receiving end. Tearing away from the New Yorker with a furious bellow, Red Lisa staggered the challenger with a hard shove and followed up with a punt aimed for the juncture of Maddy’s thi-- Crane caught the ankle in both hands, pulled Lisa’s leg out full length and halved her grip just to hoist a middle finger to the champion’s face.
“Kiss my ass you crazy bytAAARRRRRHHHHH FAAAAAAAAAHK!”
The Perilous Portrait of Human Degeneration wrapped a hand around Maddy’s index finger and bent backward like she meant to snap it clean off! Crane abandoned her grip on Red’s ankle in an effort to free her hand, a decision that proved calamitous as soon as the Waking Nightmare lunged in and GOUGED her thumb into the challenger’s left eye!
“GODDAMNYOUNNNNGGGGHHH!” Maddy’s roar of rage gave way to a sob of pain when Red Lisa finally stuffed a heavy Kneelift into the fork of her crotch. Doubled over with nausea, she couldn’t retreat to a safe distance before the Red Menace snatched hold and yanked her into a Standing Headscissors. Quick to loop her arms around Lisa’s thighs even in such dire circumstances, Mads’ attempt at defense came to an abrupt end because Red, perhaps retaining a bit of her Dreamier side’s Bittersweet theatrics, grabbed a double handful of opposing briefs and made them disappear in an eye-watering wedgie. The blink and you’ll miss itthong was bad enough, unfortunately Red Lisa’s grip was strong enough to upend Crane entirely, meaning she THWHONKED down on the crown of her skull when the champion dropped to her perfectly insane derriere.
PULLING PILEDRIVER:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=cbflyZAs_uU
Maddy landed straight up and down, was shoved to her side and immediately covered in a miniature Splash, Red Lisa hooking the far leg tight enough to bring it within a whisper of the challenger’s chin. A heartbeat later, Nick Castle dove in beside them and slapped the mat…
ONE…
TWO…
THRNOOOO!
Maddy kicked out despite of, or perhaps in spite of, all the indignities heaped upon her in the last several seconds, an insult Red Lisa laid squarely at the feet of the Senior Official. Bounding to her feet with fire in her eyes and blood dripping from her mouth and nose (that trifecta of Facebusters had done quite a number on her perfect features), the Scarlet Screamer might’ve torn the zebra’s face off if he hadn’t stood his ground and barked, “Think about the gold, Lisa! You want the doctors to take your gold?”
Big Red stopped so abruptly it looked like she’d run into a wall. “No…. DOCTORS.” she hissed.
“That’s right.” he agreed. “No doctors.”
She turned without another word and stalked back to Maddy, who was gamely struggling to verti-- “NNNNNNNGGGGHHHH!”
Red Lisa sank to one knee and smashed a pitiless blindside Uppercut between Crane’s already bowed legs. Somehow Mads remained upright (albeit it knock-kneed) meaning the FAWN World champion only had to slip in close and reach over her right shoulder to catch the redhead’s noggin in a Three Quarters Facelock. Just like that she pushed up on her left foot, kicked her right leg forward and brought it slicing back to bring both New Yorker’s down flat, Red Lisa landing on her tummy while poor Maddy was PLANTED on the crown of her skull. Crane somersaulted through the disastrous collision to end up in splayed starfish. Eyes glassy and wide, she made no sound when Red Lisa palmed her shoulders and pressed down for an academic…
DAY DREAMER @ 00:26
www.youtube.com/watch?v=nqQ2ZCG_Wx0
ONE…
TWO…
THRENOOOOOOOO!
It wasn’t much of a kick out, but then it wasn’t much of a cover and Maddy twisted her hips just enough break free of the champion’s embrace. Seemingly caught in some psychotic sensory overload in the wake of Crane’s narrow escape, Red Lisa clambered to her feet and threw herself at Nick only twist into the ropes, grab hold of the top and draaaaaaaaaaaaag her forehead across the rubber-coated steel! Reaching the nearest turnbuckle she whipped round in half circle, sprinted across the ring and BWUUUNGED her face against rough padding no less than half a dozen times!
Genuinely at a loss, Castle rushed over and barked, “GET A HOLD OF YOURSELF, LISA! CALM DOWN OR I’LL CALL THE--”
“NO DOCTORS!” she raged at the flabbergasted official. No distracting her now, Red Lisa had Nick in her sights and she went straight for him with jaws clacking and fingers twitching in anticipation of-- movement to the right snapped her attention in that direction and honed it on Maddy Crane, who was struggling to steady her footing after the gawdaful Day Dreamer.
“No…. doctors.” Red Lisa hissed to no one in particular.
Pouncing upon Mads in a single spasmodic lunge, the Shattered Image of Crimson Confusion left her feet in a vertical leap that ended with her astride the challenger’s should--THAWHONK! Red Lisa crossed her ankles and snapped back, the bloodied brunette landing on her tummy in relative comfort while Maddy was driven into the canvas like a tent spike. No half measures now, the champ bulldozed the sprawled redhead onto her back and climbed aboard, Red Lisa just digging her claws into Maddy’s biceps while she leaned in and shrieked incomprehensible madness into the other wrestler’s face through the…
DREAM DRIVER @ 00:14
www.youtube.com/watch?v=W6O_fX2O1AY
ONE…
TWO…
THREE!
Castle called for the bell at once, the CLANG of it having to contend with the displeasure of the FAWNatics and the Announcer’s confirmation. “Ladies and gentlemen, your winner of the match and STILL the FAWN World Champion, LISA DREAM!”
Usually the sound of her name (or rather, one of her names) brought The Dream back from the brink. Tonight however it only seemed to make matters worse, as she twined her fingers in Crane’s hair and started to bwunk-bwunk-bwunk-BWUNK the back of her head against the thinly-sheathed plywood!
“Hey! Knock it off, Lisa!” Nick ordered. “Get off her, dammit! I swear if you don’t get off her I’ll--oh f*ck!”
FAWN’s Waking Nightmare popped up and raced for the official, forcing Castle to make a beeline to and ultimately through the ropes. This didn’t slow Big Red in the slightest, she followed along hot on heels and probably would’ve torn him to shreds if not for the mellow shine of the overhead lights on a small group of extra steel chairs stacked in one corner of the Timekeeper’s nook.
Dismissing the black & white in an instant, Red Lisa crept over to this dubious treasure trove and ran a hand along their combined tops. “No doctors?” It sounded like a question until she glanced over her shoulder and bared her teeth at Maddy Crane. “No doctors.”
On that ominous proclamation she grabbed a chair in each hand and hurried over to the apron so she could slide her prizes inside. Following them in a moment thereafter, Red Lisa neatly placed one chair beneath Maddy’s head, then took the other in both hands and got to her feet. Seemingly mesmerized by the sight of her shadow following across Crane’s face, the Scarlet Screamer hefted the weapon overhead and shrieked, “NO MORE DOCT--”
An overwhelming roar from the capacity crowd as a camouflage blur shot down the aisle and shot under the bottom rope before coalescing into none other than Becky Clayton.
BECKY CLAYTON:
The unexpected arrival of the Peacekeeper scrambled Red Lisa’s overheated circuits for no more than a heartbeat or two, yet this was more than enough time for Bex to damned near kick the champion’s head into the upper deck with one helluva Big Boot! Dream hit the deck, popped right back up and caught a huge Forearm Smash to the mush for her troubles. Catching the babbling brunette by togs and tresses, Clayton wheeled around in a half circle to build up a good head of steam in the few steps it took her to toss the World Champ over the top rope! Big Red didn’t bounce back from that landing, she only rolled onto her back and blinked into the lights while Becky looked down on her from somewhere miles above.
“Stay down, you lunatic.” Clayton threatened over the cacophony of the crowd. “Stay down or I’ll make sure you don’t get back up.”
No response from the champ, so Becky held her tongue and her position, the BFG making sure the EMT’s had a clear path to Maddy as Mayhem slowly faded to black.
MADDY CRANE:
The capacity crowd gathered for Mayhem answered with a cacophonous roar, one that grew even louder when Shinedown’s ‘Cut the Cord’ rose over the din. Mads appeared immediately thereafter, the challenger in no mood to stand around and yak when there was only one more obstacle between herself and FAWN’s biggest prize. Which isn’t to say that Crane ignored the fan-base she’d built over a decade of hard work. Indeed she paused atop the ramp long enough to raise the ‘MC’ sigil *and* strap an invisible belt around her waist. Then she was on the move, the Sultana of Slapstick making a beeline for the squared circle. For tonight’s show closing appearance the wiry redhead sported a simple black sports bra top and matching bikini bottoms crisscrossed with thin white belts worn bandolier style while her boots and pads were done in a matching matte black. And as per tradition, the seat of her trunks featured a pithy observation with regards to this evening’s opponent:
YOUR FACE HERE, ASK ME HOW!
Increasing her pace as she approached the foot of the ramp, Maddy circled the ring to bump a few more fists, then stomped up the steps and hopped over the ropes. Once inside she crossed the canvas to the edge facing the hard camera and climbed onto the second strand. Gaze turned to the camera on the floor, Mads adopted her best newscaster voice to say, “This is Maddy Crane, with tonight’s ‘News from the not too distant Future. FAWN’s long, incoherent nightmare finally came to an end this evening when one plucky ginger with a penchant for sass finally stood up to the rampaging, delusional leather fetishist that up until recently, dared call herself the World Champion. I’m here on the scene with Maddy Crane, the badass who put a stop to all of the spitting and close talking. Maddy, anything to say to the people watching from earlier tonight? Why yes, Maddy. I’d just like to tell everyone to strap in and hold on tight because I’m gonna whoop that crazy ass.” Crane tipped the crowd a salute, hopped off the ropes and made her way to the opposite corner where Nick Castle could check her pads and boots and she could keep a careful eye on the stage.
From lunatics to stand-up comedians. Was the FAWN roster so completely lacking suitable companions to perfection? Certainly none could beat her purity of excellence, but could Christian not find someone to at least compete with it? Such were the questions that plagued the Ultimate Image as she waited for the signal to grace the Wanadreams with her presence and the assembled were so graced when O Fortuna echoed through the arena portending the immaculate arrival.
O FORTUNA:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=EJC-_j3SnXk
The jeers of the FAWNatics rose to a crescendo along with the stirring music when the industry icon appeared, moving to center stage, taking the spotlight figuratively and literally. The crowd spewed their venom and Lisa looked upon them with utter disdain, every single one jealous of her perfection instead of celebrating it.
LISA DREAM:
Having sent a chill down the spine of Dreamophile and Dreamophobe alike, Lisa lowered her gaze upon herself, there the further proof of her flawless ability wrapped around her midriff, the FAWN World Championship belt evidence of excellence even the most obtuse could not avoid or deny.
Satisfied with her bask, The Dream began her champion’s promenade, Lisa moving gracefully down the ramp and aisle, then ascending the ring steps with all the surety of someone who’s known from birth she’s without a single shortcoming.
Lisa halted and took a long look around the unfriendly confines before sticking a leather-clad leg through and follows the cowskin-covered limb into the battleground.
The Luscious One moved to the middle as her music faded, unfastened her belt, and raised it high, staring a hole through her challenger. She had a microphone in her opposite hand.
“Tonight. The joke teller becomes the joke. Enjoy your moment of relevance, playing your part in adding to my legend.”
Lisa let the microphone slip from her fingers and CLUNK against the canvas.
Dream was clad in her iconic, skin-tight, black leather; Lisa wearing her customary sleeveless vest, cut to give her pert bosom room to breathe but otherwise covering her alabaster tummy, only a slight rim of skin showing. Her long, black cowhide pants reached down to her black boots, the Dreamophiles, again frustrated at not being able to view the flawless, alabaster stems of the Personification of Perfection. A series of leather ‘strings’ cobweb across her back to keep the vest in place, though they also left a considerable portion of her ivory back in view.
Lisa gazed at Crane with utter contempt and the Announcer used the lull to declare the arrival of the title holder.
“And introducing her opponent, from New York, New York, standing five feet six inches tall and weighing in at one hundred and seventeen pounds, the Ultimate Image of Human Perfection… and YOUR FAWN WORLD CHAMPION…LISA DREAM!”
The beautiful dark-haired Dream handed her belt to Castle who brought it to an attendant for safekeeping. Moving to her corner, the “sane” megalomaniac version of The Dream stretched both sets of limbs, keeping a watchful set of brown pools on Maddy, Lisa ignoring the jeers and leers of the jealous Wannadreams.
Mads was out of her corner with the sound of bell, the redhead clearly eager to get at the Personification of Perfection. She’d been robbed of FAWN’s big belt in her first World Title opportunity, she didn’t intend for history to repeat itself. Picking up speed as she passed the center of the ring, Crane was perhaps half a heartbeat from lunging at The Dream when Lisa casually dipped her upper body through the gap between the top and middle rope. “Really Lis, already?” Maddy asked, her tone slightly mocking. “Usually you don’t go for the ropes until I’ve dropped you on your face three or four times.”
“I have no memory of any such altercation.” Lisa replied without withdrawing from the strands. “If my memory serves, and it does, because it’s perfect, our encounters end with my hand raised and you looking at the lights.”
“Enough stalling, Lisa.” Castle interjected before the challenger could offer a rebuttal. “Take it out of the ropes and get at her.”
“Oh, that’s ok, Nick.” Crane’s spoke to the referee, though her eyes didn’t leave Lisa. “You can give her another minute. I think that prescription cocktail that keeps her brain from frying is working overtime trying to suppress the memory of our last match… you know, the one where I sat on her face for the one, two, three?”
“SLANDER!” Lisa pulled clear of the ropes and made straight for her antagonist, the Ultimate Image rearing back with her right hand for a-- Maddy raised her arms overhead in a droopy-wristed ‘Y’ and pushed up on the ball of her right foot while her left knee rose to waist level. Just the threat of a Crane Kick sent The Dream backpedaling to start, the leather-clad practically throwing herself against the turnbuckles to keep clear of her foe’s foot.
The FAWNatics chuckled, but Maddy did not, she only held the pose for a few more seconds, then settled down and ceded a few steps so the champion couldn’t complain to Castle. “Don’t look so scared, Lis.” Crane murmured over the buzz of the crowd. “I have no interest in taking your pants. All I want is your shiny gold belt.”
“It’ll never be yours, Wannadream.” Lisa answered in a sibilant hiss. “Tonight your only prize is a well deserved comeuppance for daring to put those impertinent cheeks upon my perfect visage.”
Maddy bit her bottom lip in a coy smile, then raised her left hand and waggled her fingers at the brunette. “I knew you remembered. That little whimper against my butt was--”
CRACK!
Dream pushed off the buckles, reared back and clouted Crane’s cheek with a Bytch Slap that swiveled her head to one side. “Your receipt has just come due, you motor-mouthed whelp.” she hissed in Mads’ ear. “And I mean to collect with CRIPPLING inter--”
Maddy’s head snapped back, putting her nose to nose with the Reflection of Perfection. “My hand’s still up there, champ. You want to make me pay? Lock up and prove it.”
The demand was fresh off her lips when The Dream obliged, Lisa joining her right to Maddy’s left. Their fingers laced and started to squeeze even though the Test was only half done. “You asked for this, Crane.” Dream growled. “Remember that when you’re on your imperfect knees, bleeding and begging for mercy. You ASKED for this.” She raised her left hand and Crane immediately mirrored her, brunette and redhead driving in mouth on shoulder in an effort to control the Test of Strength.
“I remember, Lis. Just like I remember how you needed Celia and the Sisters to beat me the first two times. Now it’s just you and your batshyt crazy roommate. And two against one is odds I can hanNGH!”
Lisa jerked her head to the right, driving it against the other wrestler’s temple. Maddy answered in kind and soon enough champ and challenger were getting after the other with an exchange of miniature Headbutts. “Yammer about the odds all you like, Wannadream.” Lisa hissed. “It doesn’t change the fact that failure has soaked through every fiber of your being. The sad truth is, every bit of success you’ve ever achieved only ensures you’ll make a more attractive pedestal for my perfect bootSUUGGGHH!”
Maddy drew back from the encroaching brunette for the sole purpose of thumping her chest against Lisa’s. T’was no collision of tank-top terrors true, yet The Dream still stumbled back a couple steps and Crane stayed close, the redhead damned near glued to her immaculate adversary. “You should know better than to bullshyt a bullshytter, Dream.” Challenger and champion were nose to nose now, neither willing to do so much as blink in the face of such brazen, incendiary eye contact. “The record book may show you as two-time World Champion, but the whole locker room knows you only won the first by yourself. Celia’s monster is the real FAWN champ and you’re not fit to carry Sue Burlingame’s bagSSOOOFFFFHHHH!”
The Ultimate Image of Infuriated Indignation plowed a Kneelift into the washboard of Maddy’s tummy, then pivoted on her left foot so she could double pump the leather-sheathed broadside of her right thigh across those startled abdominals! Crane’s legs shimmied ominously before they gave way entirely, their rapid descent helped along by The Dream, who went up on her tiptoes and pushed the redhead’s hands back over her own wrists. It was more a violation of etiquette than an actual breach of the rules, thus explaining why Nick Castle did nothing even in the face of overwhelming boos from the Mayhem throng.
Still on tiptoe after forcing Crane to genuflect before Perfection, Lisa bounced in place to exacerbate the strain on those wrists. “Oh, don’t waste your breath, Wannadreams!” she sneered at the crowd. “Or MY oxygen, for that matter! This yippy little toe rag is exactly where she belongs and if you could stop distracting me for five seconds, I could dispose of her as quickly and efficiently as possible!” Shifting her gaze to the kneeling redhead, Lisa gnashed Maddy’s fingers between her knuckles and continued to bear down on those aching wrists. “Ask her!” Lisa barked at Castle after several more seconds. “If the quit oozing from her pores is any indication, she’s finished!”
The Senior Official was almost certain this wasn’t true, yet he wasn’t brave enough (at least not anymore) to call out Lisa’s bombast unless it was absolutely crucial. Since it wasn’t he went to one knee and said, “How you doing, Maddy? Need me to call for the bell?”
“Call the Fashion Police instead, Nick.” Crane grimaced. “I think they’ve got some outstanding warrants on these tacky ass pleather paMMMRRHHHH!”
Dream set her feet flat and thrust her tummy forward, all the better to swipe it back and forth against Maddy’s mug! “Better idea. I’ll call Code Enforcement to deal with that dumpster fire in your mouth. How does that sound, Wannadr--”
Lisa’s question was cut off behind the ‘clack’ of her teeth coming together, the lithesome brunette suddenly much more concerned with Maddy’s position now that the challenger was pushing off her knees. The Waking Nightmare didn’t make it easy, but Crane never eased up for a second and sooner than later they were back to the positions they’d occupied prior to Dream’s Kneelif-- “OOOOWWWWW!”
Lisa shouted and went up on tiptoes, only now it was because Maddy drew their tethered hands from midnight to six and forced the brunette’s wrists in the direction of her forearms like they were playing a high stakes version of the old bad schoolyard masterpiece, Mercy.
“I got a better idea, Lisa sweetie. Why don’t you try to shut my mouth yourself? Or call out to the real champ, see if she can show up in time to keep you from losing HER Title.”
Lisa hated the stinging pain in her hands, she hated the notion of ‘Red Lisa’ as an individual unto herself even more. “There is NO Red Lisa.” she hissed. “There is only The Dream and The Dream will not be denied!”
Lisa sent her head flashing forward, butting Crane in the bridge of the nose. Maddy’s head flopped back, neck loosened considerably by the blow. Some corpuscles started to leak from one of the challenger’s nostrils.
“Who’s Red?” Lisa sneered.
Maddy’s head not only recovered its stability but the challenger’s eyes gained a steely focus, her grips on Lisa’s fingers tightening, drawing a mewl of pain before Maddy delivered a butt of her own to Dream’s braincase.
Payback sent a released Lisa staggering away, holding her nose with one hand and begging off with the other. Soon, The Dream’s back was pressed tight into a corner, nowhere else to retreat.
“Not the perfect comedian, I take it,” Maddy informed. “It’s OK, Lis. I’m not much for joking tonight.”
Lisa covered high, bringing her forearms up to cover her flawless features and Crane drove a stiff combo into the thin rim of ivory skin on the waistline of the champ. With the Ultimate Image’s defenses lowering, Crane worked Lisa’s jaw, swabbing Dream’s head from side to side with her fisticuffery. With Dream in a stupor after Crane’s Sugar Ray impression, Maddy lifted her right elbow high and crowned the top of Lisa’s skull with an elbow of the Bionic variety, dropping a battered Lisa to her haunches.
Maddy turned away from the penitent Lisa, letting her cheeks hover a few inches from the glassy-eyed Dream.
“Does she want seconds, Wannadreams?!” Maddy shouted.
The FAWNatics overwhelming response was a hearty ‘YES’ and Mads obliged, stuffing her pert backside into Lisa’s mug, filling the Dream’s face with her taut little booty.
“Deja-vous all over again,” a beaming Crane chuckled, mopping her ass across the buried features of a squirming Dream. Pushing her palms against Maddy’s rump, a sputtering Lisa found enough room to rise.
“How daruuuh…”
The legend is cut off with a European Uppercut clattering against the underside of Lisa’s mandible. The challenger shoved a rattled Lisa past, The Dream stumbling to the middle of the ring but remaining upright, if bent over, trying to recover her bearings. Crane took to her nest at the top of the corner, turning to face her stalled target. Taking flight, it becomes ever more clear, Maddy’s on a mission. Crane finished off her volley with a brutal Snark Attack, POUNDING Lisa in the posterior.
SNARK ATTACK @ 00:10
www.youtube.com/watch?v=QzQSeKycYDY
Dream waddled forward from the very personal attack, knees knocking, the Dreamophobes enjoying every second of her discomfort. She leaned her forehead into the top buckle, Maddy watching with bemusement.
“I know you’re in there somewhere, Red,” she shouted at Dream. “Come out and play. I want to beat the REAL champ.”
Maddy shrugged when Lisa only managed to massage her leather-bound butt and groan incoherently.
“I get it,” Maddy responds. “Not embarrassing enough. Let’s see what else we can do.”
Racing in from mid-ring, Maddy RAMMED a raised knee between the cheeks of the Dream, straightening up the flawless brunette then pressing against the champ’s back, sandwiching her in tight and nibbling on The Dream’s ear before whispering in it.
“Now that’s classical music,” Maddy informed. “Not some lame ass symphony. Who plays the bongos for a symphony anyway?”
Maddy roughly turned Lisa to face her and scooped under the leather-encased thighs of the title holder. She launched a wincing Dream to a seat on the top, the landing drawing another chirp from the pained Lisa. Maddy ascended to the middle cables, pulling Dream to a stance in front of her. Crane underhooks both arms of the World Champ, locking her fingers in the small of Lisa’s back.
“Let’s see how a Dream dies,” Crane growled with not a hint of mirth as she powered Lisa out of the corner, flinging her with a Double Underhook Suplex from the top.
AVALANCHE DOUBLE UNDERHOOK SUPLEX:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=K-j49q5yI0g
Lisa THWUMPED in a spine-first collision with the canvas halfway across the ring, The Dream bouncing several inches into the air from the ferocity of the impact then spreading out in a motionless starfish, the fight apparently pounded out of perfection. A grimacing Crane ignored her own pained vertebrae and crawls to the waylaid brunette, dropping across her in a lateral press for the…
ONE…
TWO…
Lisa kicked free in a spasm that left her on a hip and elbow, reaching to massage the base of her backbone with a free hand. A risen Maddy collected the readymade handle at the wrist and tugged Dream to her feet. Sliding next to the reeling Lisa, Crane locked near arms with her foe.
“There’s only so long you’ve got, Red.”
Maddy pivoted and scooped her free arm behind Lisa’s near knee, lifting the joint so it settled behind the Mirthmaker’s neck.
“Before this has-been gives away your gold!”
With Dream situated on one stem, Maddy launched Lisa into a less than graceful, partial back-flip, the challenger delivering Dream face and chest-first to the deck, busting the brunette.
BACKDROP FLIP FACEBUSTER:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=TIw1HNXKvjA
Lisa bounced to a three-point stance on her knees and forehead, the champ hugging her aching chest before collapsing onto her side, the concussive blow turning her lights off as a rampaging Maddy shoved Dream to her back, climbing aboard in a crossbody for the…
ONE…
TWO…
THRNOOOO!
The Ultimate Image barely shifted a shoulder up, weakly enough Crane checked with Castle. He held his thumb and forefinger a few inches apart.
“There’s a joke there,” Maddy said, smiling at the man’s digits, “but this is a family crowd. A demented family if they’re coming to FAWN. But still…a family.”
While Crane had her fun with the organization’s lead referee, Dream rolled to hands and knees but seemed stuck there in recovery mode, trying to blink some senses into place with her fluttering lids. The Princess of the Punchline dove on her back in MMA mode.
She controlled her foe then rolled to her back, bringing The Dream with her. The champ’s back ends in Maddy’s lap. Quickly, Crane grapevined her foe’s legs around the leather-clad lovelies of the title holder, then drew her left arm across Lisa’s throat, trying to secure a Rear Naked Choke on the faltering Lisa.
But before the redhead could lock the noose tight with her opposite arm, the cracking Ultimate Image leaned chin to chest then threw her head back, SMACKING her skull into Maddy’s chin. The Dream rolled clear of the loosened limbs of her challenger, pushing to hands and knees as a dazed Crane flexed her jacked jaw.
Eyes locked on Lisa even as she covered the bottom half of her face with one hand, Maddy allowed a few more seconds to catch her bearings, then knee walked over to the penitent Perfectionist and caught a double handful of hair. “Up, Lisa.” Crane ordered as she began to rise. “I said UPNGH!”
Set on one knee, The Dream balled both hands into fists and fired a left-right-left combination into the challenger’s trim tummy. “Don’t order me around, Wannadream.” Lisa barked. “Don’t even consider OOFFH!”
Seeing that the brunette was on her way to verticality, Mads relinquished the hair-holds and fired off some snappy body shots of her own. “I’ll do whatever the hell I wanna do, Lis. History shows you can’t do a damned thing about NNNGGGHH!”
FAWN’s World Champion bared her teeth, staggered back a step and CRAAACKED a single scintillating Knife-Edge Chop across the other New Yorker’s chest. “That so, Wannadream? It seems you need a reminder of your position within the perfect order of thi--”
Crane split the air with a Chop of her own, unfortunately The Dream spun aside to evade the blow and take up residence on her opponent’s six. Her window was a short one, but lest you forget, Lisa was perfect which was why she made the most of it by catching a double handful of crimson locks and yanking Mads backward into a quick Headbutt that landed flush against the nape of her neck! The Sultana of Slapstick flailed without losing her footing, so Lisa went up on tiptoe and dropped to one knee while the back of Maddy’s neck was still snugged tight against the curve of her forehead. The result was a sort of Inverted Jawbreaker or possibly a Kneeling Neckbreaker. Whatever you called it, the move wrenched Crane’s neck at an awkward angle and sent her stumbling away from the champion with both arms swaddling her buzzing sk-- Lisa reached out, caught her foe’s waistband in an overhand grip and yanked her in for another Headbutt, this one landing firmly in the small of Maddy’s back!
“What’s wrong, Wannadream?” The Dream sneered over Crane’s groan of protest. “The crushing weight of your inadequacies starting to slow you down?” Mads’ reply didn’t get beyond the firs syllable before Lisa raised both hands overhead and SLAPPED ‘em down between the redhead’s shoulders! Movement already slowed, the Princess of the Punchline effectively froze in place, offering Lisa ample opportunity to sidle ‘round to the front.
“You’re going to learn to keep my name out of your mouth, Wannadream.” the Ultimate Image of Painful Prognostication explained in the midst of catching Crane’s chin in both hands. “Even if it means wiring your damned jaw shut.”
Maddy answered with a few stunned punches to those perfect flanks, ineffectual shots that Lisa shook off en route to twisting the both of ‘em into a back to back configuration with the challenger’s head wrenched backward over the point of Lisa’s right shoulder. The crowd was still analyzing this arrangement when The Dream kicked both feet forward and dropped to her tush, which in turn THWHUNKED Maddy’s aching skull against her shoulder! The Hangman’s Neckbreaker left Crane in a slumped seat until a dismissive nudge from Lisa turned her onto her belly.
HANGMAN'S NECKBREAKER:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=27cYbPg4pcY
“That you, of all Wannadreams would dare to undermine my validity as champion,” The Dream shook her head in disgust, “just serves to illustrate what sort of a sick joke you are, Crane.”
“Yuh… you got it all wrong, Lis.” Maddy braced her forehead and palms against the canvas so she could power to all fours. “I don’t care about your validity as champion… I just think you’re a really shitty human beiNNOOOFFFHHH!”
Lisa rushed forward and buried a savage punt in the redhead’s flanks, Maddy folding up around the encroaching footwear even as it lifted her off the canvas and sent her tumbling onto her back. “SHUT YOUR MOUTH, WANNADREAM!” Lisa bellowed down at the rasping redhead. “I AM A CHAMPION, YOU’RE A COCKROACH!” She stepped forward, raised her right leg and stomped that heel deep into the challenger’s navel. “I AM A LEGEND, YOU’RE NOTHING BUT TRASH!” Maddy gurgled, rolled over onto her belly, cried out in sharp anguish when Lisa stamped on the small of her back! With Crane pinned beneath her boot, The Dream leaned in and grrrrrrrrrround her heel against the wailing wrestler’s vertebrae. Over this commotion, she explained, “I am perfection and you? You’re a punchline.”
Another hard stomp put Maddy on her back once more, so the Ultimate Image of Targeted Trampling turned ‘round and stalked to the far side of the ring, where she dipped through the ropes to take a position on the apron. Grabbing the top rope in both hands, Lisa leaned back and vaulted onto the strands just to fly even higher, the leather-clad lovely seeming to disappear in the lights before she dropped outta the sky to THWHUMP down back-first across the challenger’s chest with a ‘Nightmarish’ Springboard Senton.
Far from done despite the perfect landing, Lisa rolled through, sprinted forward and hopped onto the second rope without missing a beat. First came the nightmare, then came the Dream, or rather a Dreamysault, Lisa’s vaunted midsection THWHAMMING down atop her opponent’s chest! Maddy’s far leg popped into the air so The Dream caught it in a perfect Cradle and leaned all her weight in across Crane’s shoulders while Castle and the capacity crowd counted off…
NIGHTMARE SENTON & DREAMYSAULT:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=bEPLqSMOhSg
ONE…
TWO…
THRNOOOO!
The Queen of the Facebusters kicked free about half a second before three, much to the irritation of FAWN’s Waking Nightmare. “What are you thinking, Castle?” she snapped at the Senior Official. “Even an open mic night hack like this one knows you have to end a joke before it gets old.”
Nick offered her a shrug the champ found entirely too insolent. “Sorry Lisa, guess this one’s got a few more laughs in her. You wanna bring the house down? Be funnier.”
Lisa’s eyes narrowed to dark slots. “Trust me, idiot. I’m hilarious. And I’ll leave you in stitches if it suits me.”
Returning her attention to Crane when Castle scurried to a safe distance, The Dream shoved Maddy onto her stomach, grabbed hold of her right wrist and angled that arm across her lower back so Lisa could pin it in place with her right knee. From there she claimed the other New Yorker’s left wrist and elbow, tugging Maddy’s arm up and back at a sharp angle. “Ready to accept your place in my shadow, alongside the rest of the Wannadreams?” Lisa chided. “Or shall I continue to humiliate you?”
“Do your worst, beeyotch.” Maddy grunted. “The only embarrassment here is your attempt at trash talkKEERRRGGGHH!”
The Ultimate Image abruptly folded Crane’s left arm across her lower back and shifted her hands so she could control both of the prone New Yorker’s wrists. Standing up without releasing her hold, Lisa pivoted a quarter circle and stepped over Mads’ frame to plant her boots near the redhead’s right shoulder and hip. Then she dropped to her butt, landing with her right leg slung across Maddy’s lower back and her left leg bearing down on the nape of Crane’s neck. Gripping her right wrist in her left hand for extra torque, The Dream clamped down on Maddy’s left wrist and CRAAAAAAAANKED up on a hellaciously perfect variation on the Kimura!
DREAM THERAPY:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=3D0U5u8597o
“AAAAAAAHHHHHHHH F*CK!” Crane shrieked as Lisa tried to add several elbow bends to her left arm.
“What do you say, Mads?” Castle asked. “Need me to call for the bell?”
“NO!” the Smiling Knight shook her head as best she could. “No, just back up and EERRRRRRHHHHHH!”
“Don’t be foolish, Wannadream.” Lisa cooed. “This idiot’s not good for much, but I’m certain he’s got the EMT’s on speed dial. Let him help you.”
Dream raised her right leg and slammed her heel into the back of Maddy’s skull a half dozen times before returning her attention to her therapy.
“Do you want to reconsider?” Lisa asked, the arrogance in her voice growing but also the impatience when the madcap Maddy refused to give in.
Flustered by her lack of perfection in forcing FAWN’s court jester to capitulate, Dream unknotted herself from the captured Crane and hopped to her feet, furious at her imperfect foe’s lack of compliance.
Determined to make a point with the Dreamophobes and Dreamophiles alike, Lisa sank her ruby-tipped nails into the auburn locks of Crane and RIPPED Maddy to her feet, only to gut Mads with a Toe Kick to her flat, ivory abdomen. Forced to double at the waist, her dark eyes bulging as she tried to draw in air, Maddy could do little to stop the rampaging Dream when she pulled Crane’s lowered head forward, between her leather-encased lower limbs.
Lisa clamped down with the Standing Headscissors and a buzz grew as a beaming Dream raised her right hand high, forming it into a familiar paddle. Dream looked at her instrument with pride and joy before bringing it down in an echoing SWAT across Maddy’s derriere, Crane flinching from the stinging rebuke. But Lisa was no one-note musician and, despite the wriggling of her foe, Lisa blistered Maddy’s backside with a Bittersweet Symphony that drew jeers from the Wannadreams and a sneering smirk of satisfaction from the World Champion.
With one final two-handed crescendo, Lisa ended her masterful musical montage and dismounted Crane, allowing Maddy to limp away, both hands glued to her bum, trying to cool the fire below. Concentration on the whereabouts of The Dream lacking, Crane wandered to center stage, still doubled as she fanned her tanned cheeks.
A looming Lisa rambled into the ropes and rebounded, sprinting at Crane from her left flank. She drew a looping right arm overhead and DOWN across the back of Maddy’s neck, the clueless Crane’s face PLANTED into the deck, making the impact a double-play to Maddy’s braincase, Lisa’s signature Dreamsicle an emphatic second exclamation point in a row.
Lisa skidded to a stop after the violent crashing impact. She dropped to her knees next to the demolished challenger and shoved Maddy to her back, climbing aboard in a lateral press to dash the hopes of the Wannadreams once and for all with the…
ONE…
TWO…
Maddy threw a shoulder up, pushing Lisa to her haunches. Showing a hint of hyperventilation, Lisa had Castle backing up even before the champ demanded to know what happened during Nick’s grade school career that kept him from being able to reach ‘THREE’. To his credit, Castle insisted on his decision and Lisa turned her laser-like gaze back to the rising Maddy, Crane having made it to all fours.
“There’s a reason I’m sublime and you’re ridiculous,” Lisa growled, eyes narrowing to slits a she reached the challenger and pulled Maddy to her knees. “AnDDUHHHH!”
Maddy drove a fist into the Lisa’s flawless tummy, backing her up a step. The Dream came back but ate another and another, Crane rising as Dream’s on the backpedal, suddenly looking vulnerable. In disbelief Crane could mount a comeback, The Dream surged toward the redhead.
Crane pivoted and PLANTED a swinging elbow between the eyes of the Immaculate One, jarring The Dream, Lisa looking lost. Maddy grabbed a wrist and spun next to the Ultimate Image, ending in a stance side by side with the title holder, both facing in the same direction. She wrapped her near arm around the neck of The Dream, leaned back, then threw her frame forward, SPIKING Lisa’s perfect puss into the thinly-sheathed plywood with a Bad Joke.
BAD JOKE:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=6AQptWZ0NtY
The force of the reverse Russian Leg Sweep rocked The Dream, the brunette absently flopping to her back. Maddy dove across the splayed Lisa and the crowd came to its feet for the ultimate punchline as Castle slapped the mat for the…
ONE…
TWO…
THRNOOO!
Unwilling for perfection to end, something deep inside the Ultimate Image of Human Perfection coerced Lisa’s body to spasm and get her shoulders off the canvas in the nick of time. Slopping to her side, eyes clouded, The Dream’s daze evident, the champ couldn’t manage more and it became Maddy’s job to tug her foe the rest of the way to a rubber-legged vertical.
As both women reached their feet, one less willingly, The Dream broke free from Crane’s grip. The champ fashioned her right index and middle fingers into a fork to poke the peepers of the Mistress of Mirth, but Crane’s seen some Stooges in her day. She got a knife-edge up to block, inserting it between the fingers to prevent Dream’s attempt to blind her.
With Lisa’s shortcut upended, Maddy raised a pointed elbow high and THUMPED the bionic joint into The Dream’s forehead, Lisa driven to her knees from the concussive contact, her lids fluttering over glassy pools.
As the champ tried to regain her faculties, Maddy rose on one stem, prompting an ovation from the FAWNatics, Crane going all Mister Miyagi, setting up for her infamous Crane Kick then sending it ripping through the air in front of her when Lisa started to ascend. The boot SLAMMED into perfection just beneath the point of Lisa’s chin and lifted The Dream’s soles from the canvas, Lisa flying to a flattened starfish, out cold from Maddy’s specialty.
But Crane didn’t go for the pin. Instead, she jogged to the most distant corner before spinning and racing at the splayed Dream. She leapt over the brunette, bunny-hopping to the middle ropes while grabbing the top. From that vantage, the challenger sent her legs up and back as she vaulted out of the corner and into a rib-crushing Reverse Splash.
REVERSE SPLASH:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=UdkKP61sVuc
The ring-rattling impact DESTROYED what’s left of The Dream and a delighted crowd reveled as Maddy hooked a leg and rolls Lisa into a cradled ball for the…
ONE…
TWO…
THRNOOOO!
Lisa didn’t kick out because she didn’t have to, the cagey World Champion simply reached out and grabbed hold of the bottom rope, forcing Castle to break the count of his own accord.
“Clever girl.” Crane grunted after she’d leaned back on her haunches to catch a couple deep breaths. “Too bad this T-Wrecks Your Shyt is still gonna eat you the hell up!”
“Uuuuhhh… open that mouth any wider and you’re likely to fall in, WannadreAAARRRHHH!”
The Dream yowled in pain and outrage when Mads buried both hands in her hair and swiftly BWUUUNGED her forehead offa the top turnbuckle. Lisa rebounded away from the impact and that was fine with the challenger, as she used it to swing around in a half circle before sprinting to the opposite corner with The Dream still in tow. Prepared for an emphatic albeit traditional second serving of turnbuckle smash, the FAWNatics ‘ooooooohhhhed!’ in surprise because Crane leapt over the ropes to land on the apron while forcefully driving Lisa’s forehead into the canvas-sheathed steel!
Lisa’s noggin whipped back and she staggered into the center of the ring, the heel of one hand pressed between her eyes. As for the Sultana of Slapstick, she hurried to the middle of the apron to better line up with the reeling champion. Taking the top rope in both hands, Mads launched herself up and over, the redhead’s legs spread in a wide ‘V’ to ensure the most comfortable landing even as she caught hold of Lisa’s skull and THAWHONKED her down on that aching forehead courtesy of a beautiful Springboard Sit-Out Facebuster!
SPRINGBOARD SIT-OUT FACEBUSTER:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=h99Ww5oEwmY
The Dream did a damned fine impression of a lawn dart on impact, though the residual momentum meant she bounced out of the challenger’s reach before Crane could go for a cover. Didn’t seem to bother the Sultana though, she looked happy as ever crawling after Lisa to collect another handful of hair.
“No more running, Lis.” Maddy explained in the midst of drawing her longtime rival into a Standing Headscissors of her own. “Tonight FAWN wakes up from this bullshyt nightmare of yours.”
Lisa tried to tug free of the Scissors though her efforts came to naught when Crane butterflied her arms and wrenched them overhead in a Double Underhook. For a moment it looked like Mads might bust out a Symphony of her own, yet in the end she chose to clasp her hands and muscle the leather-clad brunette head over heels, The Dream’s toes pointed at the rafters. Lisa, flashing back to some very un-Dreamy moments in her past, shouted, “You’re not fooling anyone, Wannadream! You’ll never be Deschain, no matter how hard you WHAOOUUUUUNNNNGGGHH!”
Maddy didn’t borrow her mentor’s finish, rather she went up on tiptoe and swung Lisa forward and down while dropping to her tush to THWHAM the Ultimate Image of Breathless Bewilderment flat on her face, chest and belly with a Sit-Out Double Underhook Facebuster!
SIT-OUT DOUBLE UNDERHOOK FACEBUSTER:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=0sqfxAWN4BQ
Lisa remained facedown in the aftermath, her obvious vulnerability earning Maddy a raucous roar from the capacity crowd. The din subsided somewhat when the redhead scraped Lisa up without trying for a pin, but it came back all the louder once Crane slapped on the Double Underhook for the second time. Knees dipped slightly, Maddy sank a little deeper, then swung The Dream into the air, not upside down, but arched awkwardly over her left shoulder in what might’ve been an especially painful Backbreaker… if Maddy had chosen to bounce in place instead of launching ‘em both into a dizzying spin cycle. Once, twice, three times around they went before Mads swung the imperiled perfectionist off her perch and sat out full force, the ‘thump’ of her landing utterly overwhelmed by the resounding THAWHAAAAM of Lisa’s flawless frame putting a perfect divot in the canvas!
ELEVATED SIT-OUT DOUBLE UNDERHOOK FACEBUSTER:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=FvTuc4uqDgA
Now Crane went for her cover, the Smiling Knight shooting a Half Nelson and twisting ‘round a quarter turn to catch both of The Dream’s legs in a Back Press that pointed her butt at the lights for…
ONE…
TWO…
THRENOOOOOOOO!
Lisa twitched her way free at the last possible second, Crane’s golden dream so close to reality that Castle had to bark an order to the Timekeeper to prevent an erroneous decision.
Set on her knees beside the cratered remains of Lisa Dream, Maddy Crane raised three fingers for Nick Castle even though more than a decade in the ring told her it never worked. “C’mon Nick,” she huffed. “That was three.”
“It was as close to three as it can be without being three, Mads. Keep on her.”
The challenger did just that, catching Lisa by the ears so she could scrape, peel and pull her into a snug Front Facelock. Lowering her head just enough to sling The Dream’s near arm across her shoulders, Crane helped herself to a strong hold on Lisa’s leather waistband and muscled her skyward for a little Insult 2 InjurNO! Lisa kicked her legs wildly, the embattled champion doing anything and everything within her power to return to terra firma. Undeterred, Mads stuffed a pair of Kneelifts into the brunette’s tummy to quiet her down, then gathered her strength and-- “OOOWW BYTCH!”
The Dream couldn’t escape Crane’s grasp so she pivoted into it and STAMPED on her left foot in a bit of slapstick Maddy might’ve appreciated if she wasn’t on the receiving end. Tearing away from the New Yorker with a furious bellow, Red Lisa staggered the challenger with a hard shove and followed up with a punt aimed for the juncture of Maddy’s thi-- Crane caught the ankle in both hands, pulled Lisa’s leg out full length and halved her grip just to hoist a middle finger to the champion’s face.
“Kiss my ass you crazy bytAAARRRRRHHHHH FAAAAAAAAAHK!”
The Perilous Portrait of Human Degeneration wrapped a hand around Maddy’s index finger and bent backward like she meant to snap it clean off! Crane abandoned her grip on Red’s ankle in an effort to free her hand, a decision that proved calamitous as soon as the Waking Nightmare lunged in and GOUGED her thumb into the challenger’s left eye!
“GODDAMNYOUNNNNGGGGHHH!” Maddy’s roar of rage gave way to a sob of pain when Red Lisa finally stuffed a heavy Kneelift into the fork of her crotch. Doubled over with nausea, she couldn’t retreat to a safe distance before the Red Menace snatched hold and yanked her into a Standing Headscissors. Quick to loop her arms around Lisa’s thighs even in such dire circumstances, Mads’ attempt at defense came to an abrupt end because Red, perhaps retaining a bit of her Dreamier side’s Bittersweet theatrics, grabbed a double handful of opposing briefs and made them disappear in an eye-watering wedgie. The blink and you’ll miss itthong was bad enough, unfortunately Red Lisa’s grip was strong enough to upend Crane entirely, meaning she THWHONKED down on the crown of her skull when the champion dropped to her perfectly insane derriere.
PULLING PILEDRIVER:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=cbflyZAs_uU
Maddy landed straight up and down, was shoved to her side and immediately covered in a miniature Splash, Red Lisa hooking the far leg tight enough to bring it within a whisper of the challenger’s chin. A heartbeat later, Nick Castle dove in beside them and slapped the mat…
ONE…
TWO…
THRNOOOO!
Maddy kicked out despite of, or perhaps in spite of, all the indignities heaped upon her in the last several seconds, an insult Red Lisa laid squarely at the feet of the Senior Official. Bounding to her feet with fire in her eyes and blood dripping from her mouth and nose (that trifecta of Facebusters had done quite a number on her perfect features), the Scarlet Screamer might’ve torn the zebra’s face off if he hadn’t stood his ground and barked, “Think about the gold, Lisa! You want the doctors to take your gold?”
Big Red stopped so abruptly it looked like she’d run into a wall. “No…. DOCTORS.” she hissed.
“That’s right.” he agreed. “No doctors.”
She turned without another word and stalked back to Maddy, who was gamely struggling to verti-- “NNNNNNNGGGGHHHH!”
Red Lisa sank to one knee and smashed a pitiless blindside Uppercut between Crane’s already bowed legs. Somehow Mads remained upright (albeit it knock-kneed) meaning the FAWN World champion only had to slip in close and reach over her right shoulder to catch the redhead’s noggin in a Three Quarters Facelock. Just like that she pushed up on her left foot, kicked her right leg forward and brought it slicing back to bring both New Yorker’s down flat, Red Lisa landing on her tummy while poor Maddy was PLANTED on the crown of her skull. Crane somersaulted through the disastrous collision to end up in splayed starfish. Eyes glassy and wide, she made no sound when Red Lisa palmed her shoulders and pressed down for an academic…
DAY DREAMER @ 00:26
www.youtube.com/watch?v=nqQ2ZCG_Wx0
ONE…
TWO…
THRENOOOOOOOO!
It wasn’t much of a kick out, but then it wasn’t much of a cover and Maddy twisted her hips just enough break free of the champion’s embrace. Seemingly caught in some psychotic sensory overload in the wake of Crane’s narrow escape, Red Lisa clambered to her feet and threw herself at Nick only twist into the ropes, grab hold of the top and draaaaaaaaaaaaag her forehead across the rubber-coated steel! Reaching the nearest turnbuckle she whipped round in half circle, sprinted across the ring and BWUUUNGED her face against rough padding no less than half a dozen times!
Genuinely at a loss, Castle rushed over and barked, “GET A HOLD OF YOURSELF, LISA! CALM DOWN OR I’LL CALL THE--”
“NO DOCTORS!” she raged at the flabbergasted official. No distracting her now, Red Lisa had Nick in her sights and she went straight for him with jaws clacking and fingers twitching in anticipation of-- movement to the right snapped her attention in that direction and honed it on Maddy Crane, who was struggling to steady her footing after the gawdaful Day Dreamer.
“No…. doctors.” Red Lisa hissed to no one in particular.
Pouncing upon Mads in a single spasmodic lunge, the Shattered Image of Crimson Confusion left her feet in a vertical leap that ended with her astride the challenger’s should--THAWHONK! Red Lisa crossed her ankles and snapped back, the bloodied brunette landing on her tummy in relative comfort while Maddy was driven into the canvas like a tent spike. No half measures now, the champ bulldozed the sprawled redhead onto her back and climbed aboard, Red Lisa just digging her claws into Maddy’s biceps while she leaned in and shrieked incomprehensible madness into the other wrestler’s face through the…
DREAM DRIVER @ 00:14
www.youtube.com/watch?v=W6O_fX2O1AY
ONE…
TWO…
THREE!
Castle called for the bell at once, the CLANG of it having to contend with the displeasure of the FAWNatics and the Announcer’s confirmation. “Ladies and gentlemen, your winner of the match and STILL the FAWN World Champion, LISA DREAM!”
Usually the sound of her name (or rather, one of her names) brought The Dream back from the brink. Tonight however it only seemed to make matters worse, as she twined her fingers in Crane’s hair and started to bwunk-bwunk-bwunk-BWUNK the back of her head against the thinly-sheathed plywood!
“Hey! Knock it off, Lisa!” Nick ordered. “Get off her, dammit! I swear if you don’t get off her I’ll--oh f*ck!”
FAWN’s Waking Nightmare popped up and raced for the official, forcing Castle to make a beeline to and ultimately through the ropes. This didn’t slow Big Red in the slightest, she followed along hot on heels and probably would’ve torn him to shreds if not for the mellow shine of the overhead lights on a small group of extra steel chairs stacked in one corner of the Timekeeper’s nook.
Dismissing the black & white in an instant, Red Lisa crept over to this dubious treasure trove and ran a hand along their combined tops. “No doctors?” It sounded like a question until she glanced over her shoulder and bared her teeth at Maddy Crane. “No doctors.”
On that ominous proclamation she grabbed a chair in each hand and hurried over to the apron so she could slide her prizes inside. Following them in a moment thereafter, Red Lisa neatly placed one chair beneath Maddy’s head, then took the other in both hands and got to her feet. Seemingly mesmerized by the sight of her shadow following across Crane’s face, the Scarlet Screamer hefted the weapon overhead and shrieked, “NO MORE DOCT--”
An overwhelming roar from the capacity crowd as a camouflage blur shot down the aisle and shot under the bottom rope before coalescing into none other than Becky Clayton.
BECKY CLAYTON:
The unexpected arrival of the Peacekeeper scrambled Red Lisa’s overheated circuits for no more than a heartbeat or two, yet this was more than enough time for Bex to damned near kick the champion’s head into the upper deck with one helluva Big Boot! Dream hit the deck, popped right back up and caught a huge Forearm Smash to the mush for her troubles. Catching the babbling brunette by togs and tresses, Clayton wheeled around in a half circle to build up a good head of steam in the few steps it took her to toss the World Champ over the top rope! Big Red didn’t bounce back from that landing, she only rolled onto her back and blinked into the lights while Becky looked down on her from somewhere miles above.
“Stay down, you lunatic.” Clayton threatened over the cacophony of the crowd. “Stay down or I’ll make sure you don’t get back up.”
No response from the champ, so Becky held her tongue and her position, the BFG making sure the EMT’s had a clear path to Maddy as Mayhem slowly faded to black.