Post by walkindude on Dec 25, 2019 0:26:53 GMT
Hello Friends,
Tonight's Tuesday Night Fight is FAWN's answer to a Christmas Special, a six woman tornado tag pitting the ladies of Wicked against the Misfit Toys of Maddy Crane, Autumn Sammain and Jenny Jacobs.
Hope you enjoy and Merry Christmas,
~rf
*********
“Ladies and gentlemen, it is now time for our Main Ev--”
The Announcer trailed off in confusion as the arena lights dropped away all at once. This gloom didn’t last long as the speakers offered up a soft rasp that gave way to the staccato opening of Panic at the Disco’s ‘Say Amen’ (Saturday Night)
SAY AMEN (SATURDAY NIGHT):
www.youtube.com/watch?v=sy8wclUmYWA
Been traveling in packs that I can't carry anymore
Been waiting for somebody else to carry me
There's nothing else there for me at my door
All the people I know aren't who they used to be
And if I try to change my life one more day
There would be nobody else to save
And I can't change into a person I don't wanna be, so
Oh, it's Saturday night, yeah
The lights returned with the chorus, a frantic bluish-white strobe that made it difficult to focus on the three figures that now stood atop the stage. Going on instinct rather than visual confirmation, the Announcer tried again. “Ladies and gentlemen, the following contest is a Six Woman Tornado Tag Match scheduled for one fall with a thirty minute time limit. Introducing first, weighing in at a combined four hundred and six pounds, this is Lucy Harker, Mina Murray and Daphne Dufresne! Individually they are infinitely better than you, together they are oh so WICKED!”
DAPHNE DUFRESNE:
LUCY HARKER:
MINA MURRAY:
The strobes pointed at the stage lessened enough to reveal Lucy and Mina with Daphne between them, all three ladies holding their hands high in the ‘W’ sigil they’d adopted as a crest. For tonight’s festive fracas against a trio of misfit toys all three ladies wore heartstoppin’ fightin’ crimson one-pieces adorned with high cut hips, a plunging neckline and a light dusting of silver glitter. Matching boots and pads completed their seasonally salacious look.
“Ready to wreck these white elephants, ladies?” Dufresne asked her Scandalous companions.
“You two can have the elephants.” Mina cooed. “The Dragon is mine.”
“I’ll take the prankster, then.” Lucy noted. “Nothing amuses me more than a sad clown.”
Evening plans set thusly, Wicked started down the ramp with Daphne in the lead and Scandalous a little behind in their usual hip swinging lock-step. Gifting any and all of their detractors with that devious ‘W’ and a several choice curse words, the ladies abruptly dismissed the sheeple and raced for the ring with Lucy just far enough in front to hop onto the apron. Feet planted firm, Harker leaned back against the ropes as first Mina and then Daphne shot underneath to enter the squared circle. Once they were in place she hooked her arms over the top rope and dipped her hips to roll into the ring herself. She landed just in front of Mina and Daphne and the crowd, long-time Scandalous haters that they were couldn’t help but cheer as it looked like they’d finally get-- the hateful threesome spun away from each other and raised the W’s high, their salute far more effective than any middle finger.
“And their opponents, introducing first, hailing from the Red Hook Section of Brooklyn New York, she weighs one hundred and twenty five pounds and stands at five feet five inches tall. She is the Queen of the Facebusters Tribe, the Happy Anarchist, the Glad Bomber and the Smiling Knight, she is MADDY CRANE!”
MADDY CRANE:
The capacity crowd met this announcement with an enthusiastic roar and leapt to their feet when Shinedown’s ‘Cut The Cord’ rang out in the dark. Maddy appeared with her music and raised a fist to her supporters. For tonight’s bout she wore a forest green sports bra top and matching bikini bottoms crisscrossed with thin red & white striped belts worn bandolier style while her boots and pads were done in a snowy white. Flashing her usual snarky smile, Mads whipped around and pointed to the message on the seat of her trunks:
‘You’ll Shoot Your Eye Out!’
The lights went out as Shinedown faded into the background din.
“And her Tag Team partner, hailing from Tokyo Japan, she stands at one point seven meters tall and weighs in at fifty-nine point eight kilograms. She is the Gaijin Extraordinaire, the Dragon of Tokyo, THIS IS… AUTUMN SAMMAIN!”
AUTUMN SAMMAIN:
Her name served as a harbinger for ‘Clap for the Killers’ which in turn brought Autumn through the curtain immediately thereafter. Pausing atop the ramp beside Maddy, the Joshi Kicking Machine nodded to the redhead before tearing into a lightning-fast array of punches, chops, elbows, knee strikes and finally kicks, all of which made dangerous little ’whicking’ sounds as they cut the air. Settling back to a zen-like stillness when the kata was finished, Sammain raised her left thumb to her throat and drew it across in a slow slash. Following Crane’s holiday lead, the Gaijin Extraordinaire sported a green sports bra and matching bottoms which were all but obscured by the Joshi style ‘skirt’ that ended mid-thigh. This garment was an identical, save for several bright red slashes running from north to south. The rest of her outfit consisted of green kneepads, matching boots and fingerless white gloves that reached to just below her elbows.
With that the lights came up and she extended a fist to Crane, who bumped her knuckles with an appropriately jolly ‘Ho, Ho, Ho!’ The Phenom refrained from rolling her eyes. Truth was, Mads’ enthusiasm for Christmas was obnoxiously infectious. Instead she said, “I know you’re not happy about this, Mads. That’s fine. I just need you to channel it in the right direction.”
“Not happy about what? Main Eventing a big show on Christmas Eve? I’m ecstatic!” the Smiling Knight replied.
“I know that. I meant the other thing.”
“Oh, you mean tagging with Skabenezer Traitorface? Yeah, I’m not thrilled about--”
“And introducing their partner, hailing from Antonio Bay, California, she stands at five feet four inches tall and weighs in at one hundred twenty seven pounds. She is the Innovator of Offense, the NorCal Sensation, the Girl of 8,675,309 Holds… JENNY JACOBS!"
JENNY JACOBS:
The jeers from the massed FAWNatics were still quite strong, though a keen ear would note that seemed to lack the angry venom that’d followed the disgraced former leader of the Jacob-ites during the last few years of her career. Even so, there was an audible murmur of apprehension from the sold out crowd when the former FAWN World Champion strode through the curtain and posted up beside Autumn. Seemingly paying her partners no mind, Jenny raised the J’s for a few seconds, then tucked them into invisible holsters at each hip before she glanced to the Dragon of Tokyo and the Sultana of Slapstick. “What the hell are you two still doing up here? Let’s go kick their asses.”
Strategy made clear, the NorCal Sensation turned her attention to Wicked and stormed down the aisle.
“Charming as ever.” Crane grumbled.
“C’mon. We don’t want her wading into those brats three on one.” Autumn swatted her shoulder.
“Speak for yourself.”
Despite her reservations, Maddy matched Autumn stride for stride when the limber brunette took off after her former partner.
Shifting back to the Innovator for a moment, it’s worth noting that she’d carried through on the chromatic theme with a deep green variant of her ‘starstruck’ briefs as well as a matching halter-style top with the cups held together by a small metal buckle in the shape of a star. Her boots and pads were a gleaming white while her hair was swept back in a bob that just tickled her shoulders. It was an iconic look for Jacobs, one that never failed to seize the attention of supporter and detractor alike. Even so, the Girl of 8,675,309 Holds made no move to slap any of the few hands extended in her direction, nor did she engage with any of the verbal barbs slung her way. Indeed, didn’t say so much as a word before she burst into a fevered sprint that took her under the bottom rope and well past middle ring before she bounded to her feet.
Wicked converged on her at once just as Autumn had predicted, but the Prankster and the Dragon arrived to level the playing field within the span of heartbeats, not that Jenny Jacobs gave a rat’s ass.
The seventh member of this Yuletide drama, one Nick Castle, wore the expression of a man who’d rather anywhere else as he stood solitary vigil between the set of trash-talking trios. Allowing himself one last moment for a deep breath and a thought of that sweet, sweet Christmas bonus, the Senior Official called for the bell, then damned near hurled himself into a neutral corner as the Misfit Toys crashed into Wicked to form a chaotic Yuletide scrum in the center of the ring.
No show of technical prowess this, they attacked with all the energized fury of shoppers searching for stays of retail execution at 11:59 on Christmas Eve. This shoulder to shoulder brawling carried on for maybe five seconds before breaking off into a trio of duos, Maddy and Lucy careening left, Autumn and Mina going right while Jenny and Daphne remained posted up in the center of the squared circle.
The forearm-to-mouth ratio remained one to one for a little while longer, then Sammain juked her blonde’s latest shot and made her pay a high price via a Kneelift to the gut. Three more machine-gun Kneelifts doubled Murray over long enough for the Joshi Phenom to break away to THWHAP a kick across the back of Dufresne’s left thigh, which in turn allowed Jenny to water the brunette’s eyes with a Headbutt to the bridge of the nose. Daphne’s curse wasn’t nearly enough to prevent Jenny from collecting a Front Facelock or unloading with half a dozen tire iron-ish Overhand Forearm Smashes across the taller wrestler’s upper back. The cheers from the crowd barely registered with Maddy Crane, as she was currently trying to remove a great fistful of Lucy Harker’s hair while simultaneously protecting her own face from the Scandalous brat’s questing claws.
“Gonna regret standing with those two losers, Crane.” Harker hissed as her nails scored the redhead’s nose and cheeks. “We would’ve left your pathetic ass alone if you hadn’t NNNGGGHH OOOWWW BYTCH!”
The Queen of the Facebusters pivoted into her attacker so Lucy thrust her hips back to defend against the inevitable Kneelift. In this her plan was successful but only because there was no Kneelift. Rather, Crane stamped down on Harker’s toes and twisted her heel like she meant to mash ‘em to a pulp! Lucy wobbled back on instinct, leaving herself vulnerable for Mads’ Three Stooges-style Eye Poke. Catching a double fistful of dark hair when Harker tried to turn away, the Maiden of Mirth drove a Kneelift into her lower back, then smirked when she saw Jenny and Autumn controlling their Wicked foes with a Side Headlock and a Cravate respectively.
“Well this is awkward.” she said. “How in the name of Rankin & Bass did we ALL get each other nasty bytches for Christmas?!”
Sammain soaked up a quick punch from Mina, wrenched her neck for the effort. “It’s the thought that counts, Maddy. Now lets test ‘em out.”
Jacobs wasn’t quite sure what that meant until Autumn mirrored Crane’s grip and yanked Murray up on tiptoe. Following suit with Daphne, Jacobs rushed forward to make sure the Gatecrasher wouldn’t miss the meeting of the minds, those Wicked noggins THWONKING offa one another in beautiful three part harmony. Lucy, Mina and Daphne sagged against one another without bending the knee, so the aggressors yanked ‘em up on tiptoe and split off to three different sides whereupon they hurled their pernicious presents over the top rope to a thunderous reaction from the FAWNatics!
“MERRY CHRISTMAS YA FILTHY ANIMALS!” Crane bellowed to the throng from the perch on the middle rope she’d so recently claimed.
“You can quote Christmas Story later, Mads.” Autumn barked. “For now we’ve got witches to burn.”
Aghast with amaze and horror, Crane looked over one shoulder and said, “Jesus wept, Autumn. That’s--”
“She never remembers movies.” Jacobs interrupted. “Correct her after we‘ve won., for now the Dragon’s right.”
The former best friends exchanged a nod, then ran straight for one another only to zig at the last second. They ‘twanged’ offa the strands at the same time and crossed paths a second time en route to their original targets. Picking up on the intent about that time, Crane ran the ropes at her back just after blonde and brunette ‘crossed the streams’ so she was only a couple heartbeats behind in delivering the last of three Suicide Dives that drove their respective foes into the guardrail with a resounding BWAAANG!
Never one to let their foot off the gas when they had an opponent on the ropes, Sammain and Jacobs pounded a few quick punches into their rival’s foreheads before whipping ‘round and gliding back into the ring. “Seconds?” the NorCal Sensation asked the Joshi Phenom.
“Hell yeah.” Sammain glanced to Maddy, who was still applying liberal doses of knuckle to Harker’s pate. “Crane, get in here! Time for round two!”
“Coooooooming!” Maddy punctuated with a Bionic Elbow between the eyes, pushed clear of the groaning brunette and hopped onto the apron to rejoin her partners. What should’ve been a clear path grew surprisingly difficult when Lucy surged after her, grabbed hold of both ankles and yanked the unsuspecting battler straight to the flo--“NNNRRRRRGGGHH!”
Crane’s chin struck the edge of apron with such force it unhinged her knees. She would’ve crumpled to her butt then and there if Harker hadn’t caught her in a snug Waistlock. Quick to grind her chin into the soft flesh at the base of Maddy’s neck, Lucy leered up at Autumn and Jenny and hissed, “Want her, bytches? Come get her.” The cavalry came for Mads at once, unfortunately they weren’t quite fast enough to prevent Harker from claiming a hip-level straightjacket, Crane’s arms pulled tight against her own midsection when the Scandalous brunette took her up ‘n over with a German Suplex that BWAAAANGED the back of Maddy’s head and shoulders against the steel barricade!
STRAIGHTJACKET GERMAN SUPLEX:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=McFDD1hLzX8
Such a vile landing would’ve required mandatory gloating under a more rigid rule set, but Harker hadn’t even made it off one knee when Sammain and Jacobs converged on her with a veritable blizzard of elbows and Forearm Smashes. Once Lucy was subdued they dragged her up with a double handful of hair and--
Mina and Daphne struck like raptors with a pair of high Running Knees that struck Autumn and Jenny amidships to drive them together shoulder to shoulder. Neither went down, not that this concerned Dufresne or Murray in the slightest. Catching hold of their foes at trunks and tresses, the Wicked duo bumrushed Dragon and Innovator into the apron, their lower backs striking the unforgiving edge with an ugly THWHUMP!
“I swear these decorations get tackier every year.” Daphne said after driving Autumn’s spine into the apron a second time.
Mina mulled this over as she scrubbed her forearm across Jenny’s mouth and nose. “Sounds like you think our annual good deed should be a bit of ringside beautification.”
“It IS Christmas Eve, we’re kinda running out of time.”
“If you insist.”
As one, Mina and Daph scraped their prey off the ring and bustled them across the narrow aisle whereupon they promptly bowled over nearly a dozen front row FAWNatics with a pair of flying losers! All smiles now that the odds were heavily stacked in their favor, Dufresne and Murray helped Lucy to her feet and made a point of dusting some invisible grime from their friend’s shoulders.
“Thank you ladies, that was quite refreshing.” Lucy huffed. “Now let’s shear this sheep. Daph, Mina and I have the trenches covered, wanna take the high ground?”
“Always.”
The Gatecrasher hopped onto the apron and jogged down to the far end, giving Scandalous plenty of room to work. And work they did, Harker and Murray working with pitiless efficiency as they hauled Crane to her feet so Lucy could collect her in a one-armed Three Quarters Facelock.
“Bring it in, babe!” Mina beckoned. “Let’s put this stain right where she belongs!”
That was more than enough for Harker, who charged forward and flicked her right leg up for Murray to catch. What followed was a Scandalous sort of kick-flip that sent Lucy floating over and ultimately behind her prey, the brunette landing comfortably on her belly while poor Maddy was THWHUMPED down flat on her back! The thin blue mats might’ve absorbed the very worst of the Standing Shiranui, but it still hit hard enough to bounce Crane to a slumped seat on impact. Or perhaps it was more accurate to say it sat her up for a moment because the woozy redhead was still slopping forward when Murray rushed in and THWHONKED the point of her right knee into Crane’s exposed forehead!
WICKED TEAMWORK @ 1:37
www.youtube.com/watch?v=0rhk1G365ow
Mina spun away from her victim only adopt a sweeping sort of game show starlet sort of pose that drew the crowd’s attention to Daphne Dufresne as she started her sprint down the apron. Moving with incredible confidence despite the narrowness of the runway, the Gatecrasher took flight, crunched in on herself and stretched out full length approximately half a heartbeat before she THWHAMMED down on Maddy’s chest in a vicious Frog Splash!
APRON FROG SPLASH:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=c5szrznT9DA
The New Yorker’s legs bounced up but Dufresne swatted them aside, the lithesome brunette far more concerned with joining her Wicked Sisters in throwing up those infuriating W’s. “THAT’S HOW IT’S DONE, LOSERS!” Daphne shouted to the throng once she’d exchanged high fives with her partners. She would’ve continued in that vein if a rumble from the front row drew their combined attention to Jenny and Autumn, who were clambering their way clear of the scattered tangle of chairs and fans.
“You got that?” D² asked Lucy.
“But of course.” Harker replied. “You work on mincing the ginger. Mina and I will handle salty and bland here.” Satisfied, Daphne scraped Maddy up by trunks and tresses, then bundled her under the bottom rope and rolled in after while Scandalous moved to engage the rest of the sheeple.
Intercepting their quarries at the barricade with a nasty little handful of hair, Harker and Murray CLAPPED stereo Bytch Slaps offa opposing cheeks to ensure they were too overwhelmed with Christmas cheer to resist when they turned them toward one another and-- Jacobs & Sammain locked hands in an impromptu Test of Strength that effectively neutralized a retaliatory meeting of the minds. And speaking of interesting mental phenomena, Jenny & Autumn demonstrated a beautiful bit of Tag Team ESP when they halved the Knuckle-Locks to drive identical back elbows into Scandalous chins!
Lucy and Mina rocked back on their heels, but neither relinquished their hair-holds which made it that much easier for their foes to reel them in for Front Facelocks. Practically shoulder to shoulder, Sensation & Phenom threw their foe’s near arm across their shoulders, then grabbed a handful of red trunks and hoisted them up and over for-- Jacobs made it all the way to the floor which meant Harker did too, the Scandalous brunette crashing down on a litter of chairs and a few FAWNatics too foolish to vacate the area. Mina Murray however hooked onto the barricade to stay rooted in place, then curled that hand into a fist and sent half a dozen punches into Autumn’s ribs.
“Let go of me you scrawny, whey-faced bytcOOFFFHHH!”
Sammain went up on tiptoe, then dropped to a deep squat which meant her blonde was driven chest-first into the top of the steel guardrail. Autumn enjoyed the sound so much she repeated it twice more and when she straightened up the give in Murray’s legs told her she was the only thing keeping the blonde upright. Releasing the Facelock, the Dragon of Tokyo turned Mina around and draped her arms over the barricade so she was looking into the overhead lights. Cupping Murray’s chin with one hand, she pulled the blonde’s head back and laid a single tart Forearm Smash across that proud California rack.
“Shouldn’t of told me to let you go, asshole.” Sammain chided. “Now I’ve got both hands free to hit ya.”
Still breathless from the awkward collision, Mina’s response was long on ‘tude, short on believability. “Duuuhhh… do your worst, Sammy. We both know you hit like a white beNNGGGHH!”
Jenny Jacobs stepped in on the left and brought that hand CRAAACKING down on Murray’s exposed tummy! “You gonna let her talk to you like that?” the former World Champion asked her former tag team partner.
“No. I was going to let her finish, then cave her teeth in. Thanks for spoiling yet another moment for me, Jacobs.”
Jenny’s eyes narrowed and she opened her mouth to say something but ultimately thought better of it. After a moment, she muttered, “Stop wasting time. Crane needs all the help she can get.” With that she hopped over the barricade and THUMPED a Kneelift into Murray’s exposed midriff en route to sliding under the bottom rope.
Biting back hard words of her own, Autumn straightened up the listing blonde just to jab a Headbutt into the base of her neck! Mina cried out and crumpled to all fours, allowing the brunette to join her partners un-accosted.
At about the time Lucy & Mina were feasting on knuckle sandwiches, Daphne Dufresne was scraping Maddy Crane off the mat with a double handful of hair that she transitioned to Wristlock only after reminding Nick Castle that she did so of her own goddamned volition. “Beating your punk ass is never going to carry the cache of humbling those other two bytches.” Dufresne admitted as she stuffed a shoulder into the redhead’s sternum. “But there’s just something about shutting your mouth that’s sublimely satisfying.”
A lack of response from the usually jocular battler only spurred Daphne to put that much more ‘oomph!’ on the Irish Whip that sent Crane racing at the far corner. The triple team hangover meant Mads had no chance of countering or even slowing down, though she managed a drunken half-turn which meant her back took the worst of the BWUUUNGING collision. The Queen of the Facebusters Tribe bounced away from the buckles and might’ve done a full-on Flair Flop if she hadn’t caught hold of the top rope in both hands. This act of self preservation proved far more detrimental than she would’ve liked when Daphne flew in with her right elbow crooked back somewhere behind her ear for an Elbow Smash that did just that to the redhead’s jaw!
Mads tottered but still wasn’t allowed to collapse because D² hooked her right arm across the New Yorker’s chest while simultaneously dipping her head beneath Crane’s right arm. Using that hook to draw the other woman away from the corner, Daphne cinched her left arm around the back of Maddy’s left thigh, then popped her hips to dump the Happy Anarchist on the back of her head and shoulders with an Exploder so good it was Wicked.
ELBOW SMASH & EXPLODER SUPLEX:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=84OUs8x1l7o
Maddy tumbled to another weary seat that she didn’t get to enjoy for more than a couple of seconds before Dufresne dragged her back to verticality. Now aware of Scandalous’ problems on the outside of the ring (she’d just watched that washed up troll Jacobs Suplex poor Lucy into the third or fourth row) the Gatecrasher displayed a great deal of urgency as she muscled Crane onto her shoulders for a Fireman’s Carry. “They’re not gonna save you in time, bytch.” Daphne taunted her prey. “Not that they’re trying particularly haNGH! NGH! NGH!”
Say what you will about Madeline Crane, she’d never needed anyone to save her, as she demonstrated to Dufresne by slamming several elbows into the side of the brunette’s skull. Staggered sideways by this unexpected resistance, Daph tottered into the strands and made the best of a bad situation by simply dumping Mads over the top rope! That was the intention anyway, but the Glad Bomber loved nothing more than thwarting the best laid plans so it wasn’t all that surprising when she caught hold of the rubber-coated steel and pulled herself into an awkward landing on the apron.
Her attention divided by the redhead on her six and the blonde that’d just slid under the bottom rope, Dufresne spat a curse and whipped around on her heel to unleash a big Haymaker aimed at Crane’s temp-- Maddy blocked the shot with her forearm, caught a big handful of hair and drilled a Headbutt into the bridge of Daphne’s nose! Already unsteady after that flurry of elbows, Dufresne reeled away from the Merry Prankster as fast as she could only to feel a strong hand clamp down on one shoulder after only a few steps. Daphne didn’t even get a chance to defend herself this time, as the unseen attacker simply spun her ‘round in a half circle and ‘OOOOHHHHH!’ Simultaneous surprise and pleasure from a whole host of lapsed Jacobites when their former leader hopped up, caught Daphne across the back of the head and pulled her down into a rude collision with the point of her right knee!
SINGLE KNEE FACEBUSTER:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=guzBykHSBfM
The Facebuster made Dufresne sway in place but she didn’t go down, so the Innovator hooked an arm across the back of the neck and doubled her over for a few quick Kneelifts to the gut. “Look alive, Crane.” Double J barked at her teammate (she couldn’t bring herself to think of Maddy as a partner), “there’s garbage coming your way!”
Mads answered by seizing the middle strands in both hands, so Jenny clouted Daph’s chin with a European Uppercut that put her up on tiptoe and started her tottering toward the ropes. Noting the Gatecrasher’s approach, Maddy launched herself into the squared circle with a flawless forward roll that segued into a perfect vertical leap. Mads caught herself a whole lotta hair at the apex, then kicked her legs out in a ‘V’ and dropped to her butt to THWONK Dufresne’s mug into the mat with a gorgeous Sit-Out Facebuster! The leftover momentum bounced Daphne onto her back and Crane went for a cover at once, a display of aggression that Jacobs would’ve appreciated in pretty much anyone else. Regardless, it didn’t stop Nick from swooping in to count…
ROLLING THUNDER SIT-OUT FACEBUSTER:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=fKk3vYvjvXY
ONE…
TWO…
Dufresne kicked free just after ‘TWO!’
“Keep your forearm on her jaw next time, Crane.” Jacobs muttered. “It’ll make it harder for her to fight you off.”
“I know how to pin a brat, JJ.” Maddy snapped. “After all, I pinned you.”
“You snotty little--”
“EASY.” Autumn stepped between Crane and Jacobs, forcing them to pull away. “We can bytch at one another after the bell rings, for now we need to put this one away before Harker and Murray recover.”
Jenny took a look around and spotted Mina at once, the blonde was slumped against the ring-post nearest the steps watching the interior with pale, hating eyes. Lucy was nowhere to be seen, though some commotion in the first few rows suggested she was still fighting out from under the chairs. The NorCal Sensation’s attention returned to the ring when she realized Autumn was still talking.
“Mads I want you in that corner, Jenny you take the opposite. On my signal you’re both gonna come off the top,” to Jenny, “you with an Elbow,” then Maddy, “and you with a Senton. Got it?”
“What’s the signal?” Crane asked.
“You’ll know. Now GO!”
Blonde and redhead did as commanded, hurrying to far corners while Sammain hair-hauled Daphne to all fours. A single pitiless knee to the side of the head ensured utter compliance from the other brunette, so Autumn pulled her all the way to verticality, then slipped an arm between her thighs and scooped her onto one shoulder for a Body Sl- the Dragon of Tokyo sat out to just DRILL the back of her opponent’s neck and shoulders into the thinly-sheathed plywood with a Michinoku Driver II!
MICHINOKU DRIVER II:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=oqqvZBrIaYk
The groan from the crowd told her they wanted to see a cover, but Sammain wasn’t about to countermand her own--
“LOOK OUT, JJ!” Autumn looked to Crane first, then to Jenny which meant she had perhaps half a second to register the chair Lucy Harker had flung at the precariously perched blonde! Jenny didn’t even get a chance to shift before the weaponized steel BWAAANGED against the exposed curve of her lower back! Shrieking in surprise and pain, Jacobs took a header to the canvas, landing awkwardly on her right hip and shoulder.
“Stay on Dufresne, Crane.” Autumn was already moving. “I got this bytch.”
Maddy didn’t so much as peep, rather she sank into a deep crouch and sprang out into the lights, the redhead ultimately leeeaaaning back and pulling both knees up under her chin for the Senton that THWHAMMED down atop Daphne’s chest! Unwilling to risk the Phenom’s wrath by coming to her aid, Mads rolled over into a Crossbody and hooked the far leg for…
DIVING SENTON:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=VOKb-Rh_mW8
ONE…
TWO…
THRNOOOO!
Video review later confirmed that Dufresne did kick out, but it was really Mina Murray’s perfectly placed Double Axehandle that deserved the credit for keeping Wicked in the match.
“Ooooohhhhh, so close!” the Scandalous blonde sneered as she plunged both hands into her opponent’s hair. “Don’t worry loser, I hear Santa’s bringing you a Participation Award this yeOWW! NGH! NGH! NGH!”
Maddy let Mina bring ‘em both to their feet before she casually stomped a heel down on Murray’s toes! This she followed with two straight rights to the dome, as well as a short Shoulderblock to the tits that Mina stacked against the ropes because Crane just kept coming. “I already know what Santa’s bringing me, beeyotch.” Maddy teased. “A necklace made of your teeth!”
The Smiling Knight stepped back and dropped a hip to shoot her blonde across the ring with an Irish NO! Mina reversed the momentum of the Whip, sending Crane to the strands in her stead. Mads made the journey without comment, indeed she returned moving considerably faster than when she THWHACK! Right shoulder pointed at the oncoming redhead, Murray took to the skies in a gorgeous vertical leap that got really ugly when she flicked her right leg up ‘n out to smash that calf into Maddy’s mouth and nose. The New Yorker went down like she’d been clipped by a Pandora Clothesline and there she stayed while Mina sprawled across her chest for the…
SCANDALOUS SIDE KICK:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=G-PtX0iKlqA
ONE…
TWO…
Crane powered out just after ‘TWO!’ and didn’t even get a chance to appreciate her freedom because Murray immediately sidled into a seat directly above her so she could trap the redhead’s noggin in a Headscissors! “Choke on it, Sugar Plum Freak.” the blonde demanded. “Or tap a festive little fa-la-la, I don’t give a shyt!”
Maddy’d just put a big ‘ol divot in Daphne’s sternum when Autumn dropped to one knee beside Jenny Jacobs. Dark eyes locked on Lucy Harker (who returned the gaze with equal intensity) Sammain touched a hand to the blonde’s shoulder and asked, “You ok Jacobs?”
“I’ll be fine.” the Innovator grunted through clenched teeth. “Save me a little of Harker’s fat ass, would’ja?”
“No promises.”
The Gaijin Extraordinaire slipped through the ropes to the floor below and went straight for Lucy, who had reclaimed the chair she’d used to knock Jenny out of the sky. Ceding ground at precisely the same rate Sammain claimed it, Harker taunted, “Awwwwww, does the big bad Dragon still get the feels when someone hurts her old partner? You remember what she did to you, right Sammain? Bytch cost you the World Title. What’d we ever do? Just beat your skinny ass a few times, no big--”
Instead of saying ‘deal’ Harker lowered the chair and drove the rounded top edge straight at Autumn’s tummy. But Sammain had expected just this sort of duplicity so she threw her hips backward and caught hold of the chair no fuss, no muss. “I’ll never forget what she cost me, Harker.” Autumn growled. “But that doesn’t mean you can…”
Sammain trailed off into thunderstruck silence when Lucy leaned forward over the chair and spit in the other brunette’s face. “THAT’S what she did to you, sweetie. Doesn’t feel good, does HURK!”
The Dragon released her hold on the chair to clamp down on Harker’s throat. While this choice filled her with immense satisfaction, it proved poor strategy because the Scandalous brunette simply stabbed the chair into the pit of her stomach! Sammain stumbled back but didn’t go down, so Lucy jabbed her again, then tilted the chair down at a near forty-five degree angle and drove that rounded edge into the top of her attacker’s left foot!
Autumn shrieked, pivoted on that now throbbing foot and drove her right knee into Harker’s ribs with enough force to make her drop the chair. The loss of her weapon didn’t trouble Harker for more than a moment, as that’s when she crooked one hand into a claw and slashed it across Sammain’s eyes. Even then Sammain wouldn’t release the other brunette’s neck, but her misty-eyed thrashing couldn’t prevent Lucy from treating herself to a double handful of Joshi locks. A glance over one shoulder told Harker she was right where she wanted to be, then a few quick steps backward put Autumn exactly where she did not want to be, namely a BWONKING forehead on steel collision with the ring-post!
Sammain’s legs gave out on impact, she certainly would’ve collapsed to her knees if she hadn’t draped one leaden arm over the bottom rope. “Ooooohhhh, are you just too tuff to go down, Dragon?” Harker scoffed. “Bet you’re not!”
Plunging her hands into Autumn’s hair again, Lucy cranked her prey’s head back and proceeded to BWONK it against the post no less than half a dozen times! A continuation of this technique would’ve paid dividends in seconds almost assuredly, yet when Lucy yanked Sammain away from the corner she was still vertical. Head already dipped, Harker wedged it beneath the Gaijin’s left arm and looped her right arm around Autumn’s waist. With her free hand against the back of Sammain’s left thigh, Lucy lifted the woozy bendyback onto the ball of one shoulder then stepped close to the ring and simply DROPPED Autumn spine-first along the narrow apron!
The crowd cringed right along with the Joshi Phenom, though their backs didn’t arch like they’d been touched with a cattle-prod. “Crawl in a hole and die, Sammain.” Harker cooed down at the vulnerable wrestler. “Abandon Jacobs like she abandoned you. She’s ours noHUURRRGGGHH!”
Damned if Autumn didn’t grab her by the throat and start to squeeze! Thinking fast despite the abrupt oxygen shortage, Lucy buried one hand in Sammain’s hair and pressed the other against her thigh to shove her lower body under the bottom rope. Doubling down on the hair-hold once this was done, Harker tugged / yanked Autumn partway down the edge, then pounded a knee into the back of her head until the Dragon’s hateful hand fell away.
“You still care about her, that’s cute. It really is.” Lucy huffed once she’d reclaimed a Sammain’s hair. “Then you can die on that hill with her!” The Scandalous battler tugged Autumn to the left, then whipped her in the opposite direction with such force that the lissome brunette swept around in what would’ve been a full circle if the side of her head hadn’t BWONKED offa the ring-post! No cry from Autumn now, she just shuddered and rolled off the apron to land at Harker’s feet with a damp thud.
“Sleep tight, lizard breath.”
Back in the squared circle, Maddy Crane had maneuvered her way onto all fours, though it’d cost her a great deal of energy to do so. She was plotting a handstand escape when a freshly vertical and extremely angry Daphne Dufresne snatched a handful of her green bottoms and YANKED them up in a Wicked wedgie!
“That’s what you get, BYTCH!” the Gatecrasher shouted as both she and Mina set to paddling the redhead’s defenseless cheeks. “Have you figured out you can’t f*cking hang with Wick--”
Jenny Jacobs (also freshly vertical) cinched a Waistlock around Dufresne’s slim hips and took her up, over and down with a German Suplex that PLANTED the brunette on the back of her head and shoulders!
Castle started to close in for the count but this proved unnecessary as the NorCal Sensation rolled onto her knees and clambered back to boot-leather with Daphne still hanging in her grasp. Trading her full Waistlock for a Half & Half (the other half being a Nelson) Double J got low and “NNNNNNGGGGHHH!” Daphne put an end to the blonde’s plans by whipping her right foot back through Jacobs’ legs for a nauseating Low Blow!
Twisting free of Jenny’s hold the instant her heel made contact with opposing trunks, Dufresne slipped ‘round behind and secured an identical grip to the one she’d just escaped. Well, not exactly identical, as the Girl of 8,675,309 Holds hadn’t made it a point to squeeze and claw her opponent’s breasts. “Were you actually going to toss me with a Half Nelson Suplex?” Daphne hissed in Jacobs’ ear as the mauling continued. “Allow me to explain what happens to the sheep that tries to poach my moves!” Said explanation proved extremely succinct, as D² got low, then popped her hips to pitch Jacobs through the aether with a Half Nelson Suplex that THWHAMMED the former World Champion down flat on her face, chest and belly!
HALF NELSON SUPLEX:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=Em7LxxgItoY
Dufresne might’ve snuggled in for a cover if Murray hadn’t called out, “Daphne dear, would you be so kind as to boot this ass for me?”
The ass in question belonged to Maddy Crane and it was still pointed at the rafters after Daphne’s assisting wedgie. More than happy to oblige the blonde’s request, Dufresne scrambled to her feet and ran the ropes to ensure an appropriately Wicked head of steam by the time she hopped up and THWHAPPED a Dropkick against those undefended haunches! Mina’d had her hips elevated in anticipation of just such a shot and now she brought them down which in turn drove the crown of Crane’s skull against the mat in a sort of truncated DDT.
The cruelly creative combination finally bounced Mads free from her gammy confinement, though she didn’t have the energy to do much more than roll onto her back. Daphne had just offered a hand to Mina when Lucy slid under the bottom rope and rose to her feet. “Ya know Daph, I think you were a bit harsh earlier. I’d say the decorations look GREAT this year!” Harker was all smiles as she surveyed the wreckage of Jacobs and Crane.
“Yeah, who knew a little scuffing would take the tacky right off?” Mina agreed.
“Where’s the Dragon?” Daphne asked the other brunette.
“Trying to put her skull back together, I’d imagine. It’ll take her a while. Tell me Daph, have you ever made a wish on the wishbone after a big meal?”
“Can’t say as I have.”
“Oh, you simply must! Here, Mina and I will help.”
Stalking over to Maddy, Lucy stomped on her gut a few times, then slipped that boot underneath her ribs and rolled her onto her stomach. From there a handful of hair brought her to all fours, but Harker relinquished that grip in favor of claiming the redhead’s right ankle. “Ok, you grab her other foot and we’ll this party started!” Dufresne didn’t have to ask about Murray’s role in all of this, the Scandalous blonde was already sauntering into position against the nearest set of strands. Seizing hold of Crane’s boot just as Harker had suggested, Daphne mirrored her movements to Lucy’s so it only a matter of heartbeats until they had Mads hoisted up in an involuntary handstand made all the more awkward because the heartless brunettes had wrenched her legs in opposite directions.
Tapping an insolent finger to one ear as the crowd started to jeer, Mina looked at Daphne and purred, “Make a wish, dear.”
The exact details of Dufresne’s wish are unfit to print here, suffice to say it was granted in cringe-inducing fashion when Mina charged off the strands and sprang into the air, the blonde’s right leg whipping up over her head before she brought it THWHUMPING down onto the fork of Maddy’s crotch. Crane sobbed and collapsed into a fetal ball or at least tried. She hadn’t even finished drawing into herself when Murray shoved her onto her back and collected the far leg for…
ONE…
TWO…
THRNOOOO!
Jenny roared in from deep in left field with a low-flying Shoulderblock that knocked the other blonde off her prey with a whisper to spare! The FAWNatics cheered mightily for this last second reprieve, though Wicked put a quick damper on their spirits by burying the Innovator beneath an avalanche of stomps, short Knee Drops and Double Axehandles.
“Meddling sheep.” Lucy scuffed Jacobs’ mouth with a heartless Forearm Smash, then grabbed a double handful of hair and dragged her to her knees. “I’ll teach you to turn us doOFH! OOFH! OOOFH!”
Desperate for some separation, Jenny palmed Lucy’s hips so she could stuff a Headbutt into the pit of her stomach. This she followed with a pair of clipped Uppercuts, each landing flush against her opponent’s navel. They did in fact force Harker back on her heels, but Double J wasn’t able to capitalize because Dufresne & Murray chose that moment to THW-THWHACK a pair of Low Super Kicks into either side of the blonde’s skull!
Jenny toppled to all fours and might’ve settled out even lower if Lucy hadn’t resumed her previous hard-hearted hair tugging. Once the brat was upright Harker sidled in against her right flank and trapped that arm in a Half Nelson. Her other hand secured a grip on Jacobs’ trunks just above her left hip, meaning the NorCal Sensation wasn’t going anywhere when Mina snuggled in to claim an identical grip on the opposite side. Swinging their burden around so they were all facing Daphne, Lucy said, “Put a fresh dent in her fugly little face, won’t you dear?”
The Gatecrasher stepped in, caught a handful of hair and forced scathing eye contact with the trapped blonde while she teasingly brushed at a spot on her chin. “Consider it Dnnngghhh!”
Jenny blasted her with a Kneelift just beneath the navel and immediately brought that heel down on the brunette’s toes! “Get the f*ck outta my face you gutless little--”
Daphne answered with a Super Kick to Jacobs’ defenseless face, the crisp THWHACK acting as a starter pistol for Scandalous, who dipped down and popped their hips to spike the Innovator on the back of her head as the latest victim of the Morningsidewinder. The vicious triple team left Jenny folded up in a boneless Matchbook that allowed both Lucy and Mina to pile onto those upturned haunches for the…
MORNINGSIDEWINDER:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=dux6YbpMjkw
ONE…
TWO…
THRENOOOOOOOO!
Now it was Maddy’s turn to save Christmas, a feat she accomplished with a ramshackle tackle to Daphne that sent the both of them sprawling into their stacked partners!
“GODDAMMIT!” Dufresne roared in frustration as she clambered outta the thrashing collection of bodies. “C’mere you meddling bytch!”
Snagging Mads with a double handful of hair, she muscled her to boot-leather, then dropped a shoulder and ‘hupped’ Crane up ‘n across in a Fireman’s Carry. Careful to get clear of the three fallen ladies, Daph swung ‘round in a circle to make sure everyone knew she was in total control. Once that was established she tossed Maddy onto her feet then planted on her left heel and damned near kicked the redhead’s noggin offa her shoulders with a vicious Roundhouse!
STARRY EYED @ 00:18
www.youtube.com/watch?v=FEFzLzKf9LA
Starry Eyed in the aftermath of that brutal head-shot, Maddy landed flat on her face, but Dufresne didn’t try for a cover. Instead she kicked Crane onto her back before stomping over to Jacobs so she could collect the blonde’s wrists. A round of enthusiastic tugging put the pair of rivals beside one another with the full strength of Wicked assembled overhead.
“You knocked out the Dragon, yeah?” Daphne asked Lucy.
“Left her drooling on the floor by that corner. If she’s not here getting her ass kicked, she’s out.”
“Perfect. You two go up top, these sheep need a little 450 magic to brighten their sad little lives.”
“A wonderful idea!” Mina clapped her hands. “After you, Lucy dear.”
Scandalous set off for the corner in lockstep, blonde and brunette only slowing their progress to favor the crowd with pageant wave middle fingers. Dufresne watched with obvious amusement, though she was also careful to keep an eye out for Sammain and occasionally administer a stomp to Jenny or Maddy, lest they think about trying to escape.
Neither did, meaning the atmosphere in the FAWN Arena was downright grim when Harker and Murray ascended to the top turnbuckle via each side of the ring-post. Grim or not, they offered Scandalous a grudging murmur of respect when blonde and brunette hooked an arm over one another’s shoulders and stood tall in the high rent district.
Eyes alight with evil anticipation, Lucy cooed, “And I heard them exclaim as they drove out of sight…”
“Get these miserable pieces of shyt otta my ring!” Mina finished for her. “After all, it’s Chrism--”
A thunderous roar from those in attendance when a coal-eyed Autumn Sammain leapt from the floor to the apron to the second rope in the span between heartbeats. Harker and Murray both turned to look at the interloper, a decision that proved rather disastrous as it allowed the Gaijin Extraordinaire to catch both of them both with a single spewed plume of Green Mist!
Yowling in two-part outrage, Scandalous’ situation went from dire to calamitous because Autumn gifted them with a single shove that sent blonde and brunette hurling from their perch to THAWHAM-KERHASH through the poor defenseless Announce Table!
Patently disgusted by this Christmas Miracle, Daphne Dufresne sprinted at the Dragon of Tokyo with every intention of caving in her face with a single smiting elb--PFWOOOOOOOSH!
Sammain caught her coming in with a second dose of the Green Mist! Stopped dead in her tracks, the Gatecrasher pawed and swiped at her eyes, meaning she was effectively defenseless when Autumn tagged her across the temple with a Roundhouse delivered from her spot on the apron. D² stumbled around in a wobbly arc and retreated toward the center of the ring in search of a place to clear her stinging eyNO!
Maddy Crane planted a Kneelift between the brunette’s thighs, slapped on a Front Facelock and slung Daphne’s left arm over her shoulders. Just like that she hoisted Dufresne to about three o’clock, then twisted around in a tight little circle and laid out on her belly to PLANT the Wicked warrior face-first with Insult 2 Injury!
INSULT 2 INJURY @ 2:38
www.youtube.com/watch?v=iy-Rh9DcrV0
Daphne jolted violently but Crane didn’t let her roll onto her back. Instead she hurried to verticality with Dufresne still in her grasp. Spotting Jenny pushing off her knees, Mads called, “Hey JJ!” Don’t say I never got ya anything!”
Crane transitioned to a Wristlock and just slung the glassy-eyed brunette straight at the Girl of 8,675,309 Holds. It wasn’t a whole lotta time to react, but Jacobs didn’t shy away from her ‘gift’ in fact she ran at Daphne, threaded her right arm across the taller wrestler’s chest and threw herself into a gorgeous back-flip that THAWHAMMED Dufresne down flat on the thinly-sheathed plywood!
JENNYCIDE:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=j9NtUUxaamY
Jenny reared back on her haunches, started to go for the cover, then paused when she noticed Autumn back inside the ring. Collecting a big handful of the Gatecrasher’s hair, Jenny peeled her off the mat and grabbed a wrist. “Normally I wouldn’t re-gift, but tonight I’ll make an exception. Merry Christmas, Autumn.”
Jacobs offered her gift via Irish Whip and Sammain accepted gratefully, the lissome brunette greeting Dufresne with a single quick Back Elbow to the mouth. Daphne’s head snapped back and she turned away from this latest attack, the sole surviving Wicked witch seemingly unaware that she was surrounded. Autumn was happy to remind her though, as she sidled in behind and dipped her head beneath the stunned brunette’s right arm. Curling her left arm around Dufresne’s chest so she could press a palm to the other woman’s chest. In the same breath she threaded her other hand between Daphne’s legs and hoisted / spun her through a nauseating one-eighty! Catching Dufresne around the waist in the heartbeat before gravity could bring her down, Sammain squeezed tight and sped the descent by sitting out full force, her butt meeting the mat with a soft thump that was completely overwhelmed by the heavy THWONK of Daphne’s skull against the thinly-sheathed plywood!
AUTUMN RAIN:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=AFXvzqh_-Ps
Dufresne crumpled in on herself and might’ve stayed that way all night if Sammain hadn’t rolled her onto her back and slid in place across the starfished brunette’s chest. Autumn pressed a palm against Daph’s cheek but didn’t bother to hook the far leg. This might’ve constituted a lackadaisical cover if first Maddy and then Jenny hadn’t crowded in from behind, Prankster and Innovator both pressing their palms on Autumn’s back while Castle and his Christmas chorus belted out that old favorite…
ONE…
TWO…
THREE!
Autumn maintained her perch, Jenny threw up a pair of J’s and Maddy crowded the ropes to make sure she had a good look at Scandalous when the Announcer confirmed, “Ladies and gentlemen, your winners via pin-fall, JENNY JACOBS, MADDY CRANE AND AUTUMN SAMMAIN!”
Delighted to see Lucy and Mina barely stirring amidst the rubble of the table, Maddy strode back to Autumn and extended a hand to help the victorious Dragon off her slumbering adversary. “And just how good did THAT feel, Nin-jor?” Crane asked with weary.
“Amazing.” Sammain admitted. “Still want her one on one, though.”
“Get in line.” Maddy replied, her smile fading a little. “Chick’s got a lot of receipts coming.”
“And mine comes first.” Crane and Sammain rounded on Jenny, who didn’t blanch beneath their combined glares. “Bytch cost me the World Title.” Jacobs continued. “That takes precedence, as far as I’m concerned.”
“You mean YOU take precedence.” Maddy snapped. “Why am I not surprised by this take on the situat--”
“Shut your mouth, Crane.” Jacobs interrupted. “It’s not like you’d understand what it meant to lose out on--”
“On the World Title?” Crane’s voice bristled with anger. “Oh no, I wouldn’t know ANYTHING about that! Neither would Autumn. Oh wait, that’s right! There was that one greedy bytch that screwed BOTH of us out of the big belt! F*ck, what was that piece of shyt’s na--”
Jenny surged forward only to stop when Autumn moved between them. “Stop it, both of you.” she murmured. “This is the same counterproductive shyt that let Wicked put us down before.”
Crane and Jacobs didn’t advance, but they didn’t retreat either. There was clearly still some bad blood between the longtime rivals.
After another few seconds of silence, Autumn went on. “We won tonight, that’s what’s important. And as far as I’m concerned, there’s more than enough of Daphne Dufresne to go around. Now stop glaring at each other and let me raise your hands.”
Maddy and Jenny ultimately did their partner one better, they took a wrist each and lifted Autumn’s arms in jaunty ‘V’. The FAWNatics responded with resounding cheer that grew that much louder when Sammain returned the favor for blonde and redhead.
In the end their victory was more a temporary ceasefire than Christmas miracle and no one’s heart grew ten sizes, but it still ended with Wicked looking up at those glorious lights and that was more than enough for the Joshi Phenom.
Tonight's Tuesday Night Fight is FAWN's answer to a Christmas Special, a six woman tornado tag pitting the ladies of Wicked against the Misfit Toys of Maddy Crane, Autumn Sammain and Jenny Jacobs.
Hope you enjoy and Merry Christmas,
~rf
*********
“Ladies and gentlemen, it is now time for our Main Ev--”
The Announcer trailed off in confusion as the arena lights dropped away all at once. This gloom didn’t last long as the speakers offered up a soft rasp that gave way to the staccato opening of Panic at the Disco’s ‘Say Amen’ (Saturday Night)
SAY AMEN (SATURDAY NIGHT):
www.youtube.com/watch?v=sy8wclUmYWA
Been traveling in packs that I can't carry anymore
Been waiting for somebody else to carry me
There's nothing else there for me at my door
All the people I know aren't who they used to be
And if I try to change my life one more day
There would be nobody else to save
And I can't change into a person I don't wanna be, so
Oh, it's Saturday night, yeah
The lights returned with the chorus, a frantic bluish-white strobe that made it difficult to focus on the three figures that now stood atop the stage. Going on instinct rather than visual confirmation, the Announcer tried again. “Ladies and gentlemen, the following contest is a Six Woman Tornado Tag Match scheduled for one fall with a thirty minute time limit. Introducing first, weighing in at a combined four hundred and six pounds, this is Lucy Harker, Mina Murray and Daphne Dufresne! Individually they are infinitely better than you, together they are oh so WICKED!”
DAPHNE DUFRESNE:
LUCY HARKER:
MINA MURRAY:
The strobes pointed at the stage lessened enough to reveal Lucy and Mina with Daphne between them, all three ladies holding their hands high in the ‘W’ sigil they’d adopted as a crest. For tonight’s festive fracas against a trio of misfit toys all three ladies wore heartstoppin’ fightin’ crimson one-pieces adorned with high cut hips, a plunging neckline and a light dusting of silver glitter. Matching boots and pads completed their seasonally salacious look.
“Ready to wreck these white elephants, ladies?” Dufresne asked her Scandalous companions.
“You two can have the elephants.” Mina cooed. “The Dragon is mine.”
“I’ll take the prankster, then.” Lucy noted. “Nothing amuses me more than a sad clown.”
Evening plans set thusly, Wicked started down the ramp with Daphne in the lead and Scandalous a little behind in their usual hip swinging lock-step. Gifting any and all of their detractors with that devious ‘W’ and a several choice curse words, the ladies abruptly dismissed the sheeple and raced for the ring with Lucy just far enough in front to hop onto the apron. Feet planted firm, Harker leaned back against the ropes as first Mina and then Daphne shot underneath to enter the squared circle. Once they were in place she hooked her arms over the top rope and dipped her hips to roll into the ring herself. She landed just in front of Mina and Daphne and the crowd, long-time Scandalous haters that they were couldn’t help but cheer as it looked like they’d finally get-- the hateful threesome spun away from each other and raised the W’s high, their salute far more effective than any middle finger.
“And their opponents, introducing first, hailing from the Red Hook Section of Brooklyn New York, she weighs one hundred and twenty five pounds and stands at five feet five inches tall. She is the Queen of the Facebusters Tribe, the Happy Anarchist, the Glad Bomber and the Smiling Knight, she is MADDY CRANE!”
MADDY CRANE:
The capacity crowd met this announcement with an enthusiastic roar and leapt to their feet when Shinedown’s ‘Cut The Cord’ rang out in the dark. Maddy appeared with her music and raised a fist to her supporters. For tonight’s bout she wore a forest green sports bra top and matching bikini bottoms crisscrossed with thin red & white striped belts worn bandolier style while her boots and pads were done in a snowy white. Flashing her usual snarky smile, Mads whipped around and pointed to the message on the seat of her trunks:
‘You’ll Shoot Your Eye Out!’
The lights went out as Shinedown faded into the background din.
“And her Tag Team partner, hailing from Tokyo Japan, she stands at one point seven meters tall and weighs in at fifty-nine point eight kilograms. She is the Gaijin Extraordinaire, the Dragon of Tokyo, THIS IS… AUTUMN SAMMAIN!”
AUTUMN SAMMAIN:
Her name served as a harbinger for ‘Clap for the Killers’ which in turn brought Autumn through the curtain immediately thereafter. Pausing atop the ramp beside Maddy, the Joshi Kicking Machine nodded to the redhead before tearing into a lightning-fast array of punches, chops, elbows, knee strikes and finally kicks, all of which made dangerous little ’whicking’ sounds as they cut the air. Settling back to a zen-like stillness when the kata was finished, Sammain raised her left thumb to her throat and drew it across in a slow slash. Following Crane’s holiday lead, the Gaijin Extraordinaire sported a green sports bra and matching bottoms which were all but obscured by the Joshi style ‘skirt’ that ended mid-thigh. This garment was an identical, save for several bright red slashes running from north to south. The rest of her outfit consisted of green kneepads, matching boots and fingerless white gloves that reached to just below her elbows.
With that the lights came up and she extended a fist to Crane, who bumped her knuckles with an appropriately jolly ‘Ho, Ho, Ho!’ The Phenom refrained from rolling her eyes. Truth was, Mads’ enthusiasm for Christmas was obnoxiously infectious. Instead she said, “I know you’re not happy about this, Mads. That’s fine. I just need you to channel it in the right direction.”
“Not happy about what? Main Eventing a big show on Christmas Eve? I’m ecstatic!” the Smiling Knight replied.
“I know that. I meant the other thing.”
“Oh, you mean tagging with Skabenezer Traitorface? Yeah, I’m not thrilled about--”
“And introducing their partner, hailing from Antonio Bay, California, she stands at five feet four inches tall and weighs in at one hundred twenty seven pounds. She is the Innovator of Offense, the NorCal Sensation, the Girl of 8,675,309 Holds… JENNY JACOBS!"
JENNY JACOBS:
The jeers from the massed FAWNatics were still quite strong, though a keen ear would note that seemed to lack the angry venom that’d followed the disgraced former leader of the Jacob-ites during the last few years of her career. Even so, there was an audible murmur of apprehension from the sold out crowd when the former FAWN World Champion strode through the curtain and posted up beside Autumn. Seemingly paying her partners no mind, Jenny raised the J’s for a few seconds, then tucked them into invisible holsters at each hip before she glanced to the Dragon of Tokyo and the Sultana of Slapstick. “What the hell are you two still doing up here? Let’s go kick their asses.”
Strategy made clear, the NorCal Sensation turned her attention to Wicked and stormed down the aisle.
“Charming as ever.” Crane grumbled.
“C’mon. We don’t want her wading into those brats three on one.” Autumn swatted her shoulder.
“Speak for yourself.”
Despite her reservations, Maddy matched Autumn stride for stride when the limber brunette took off after her former partner.
Shifting back to the Innovator for a moment, it’s worth noting that she’d carried through on the chromatic theme with a deep green variant of her ‘starstruck’ briefs as well as a matching halter-style top with the cups held together by a small metal buckle in the shape of a star. Her boots and pads were a gleaming white while her hair was swept back in a bob that just tickled her shoulders. It was an iconic look for Jacobs, one that never failed to seize the attention of supporter and detractor alike. Even so, the Girl of 8,675,309 Holds made no move to slap any of the few hands extended in her direction, nor did she engage with any of the verbal barbs slung her way. Indeed, didn’t say so much as a word before she burst into a fevered sprint that took her under the bottom rope and well past middle ring before she bounded to her feet.
Wicked converged on her at once just as Autumn had predicted, but the Prankster and the Dragon arrived to level the playing field within the span of heartbeats, not that Jenny Jacobs gave a rat’s ass.
The seventh member of this Yuletide drama, one Nick Castle, wore the expression of a man who’d rather anywhere else as he stood solitary vigil between the set of trash-talking trios. Allowing himself one last moment for a deep breath and a thought of that sweet, sweet Christmas bonus, the Senior Official called for the bell, then damned near hurled himself into a neutral corner as the Misfit Toys crashed into Wicked to form a chaotic Yuletide scrum in the center of the ring.
No show of technical prowess this, they attacked with all the energized fury of shoppers searching for stays of retail execution at 11:59 on Christmas Eve. This shoulder to shoulder brawling carried on for maybe five seconds before breaking off into a trio of duos, Maddy and Lucy careening left, Autumn and Mina going right while Jenny and Daphne remained posted up in the center of the squared circle.
The forearm-to-mouth ratio remained one to one for a little while longer, then Sammain juked her blonde’s latest shot and made her pay a high price via a Kneelift to the gut. Three more machine-gun Kneelifts doubled Murray over long enough for the Joshi Phenom to break away to THWHAP a kick across the back of Dufresne’s left thigh, which in turn allowed Jenny to water the brunette’s eyes with a Headbutt to the bridge of the nose. Daphne’s curse wasn’t nearly enough to prevent Jenny from collecting a Front Facelock or unloading with half a dozen tire iron-ish Overhand Forearm Smashes across the taller wrestler’s upper back. The cheers from the crowd barely registered with Maddy Crane, as she was currently trying to remove a great fistful of Lucy Harker’s hair while simultaneously protecting her own face from the Scandalous brat’s questing claws.
“Gonna regret standing with those two losers, Crane.” Harker hissed as her nails scored the redhead’s nose and cheeks. “We would’ve left your pathetic ass alone if you hadn’t NNNGGGHH OOOWWW BYTCH!”
The Queen of the Facebusters pivoted into her attacker so Lucy thrust her hips back to defend against the inevitable Kneelift. In this her plan was successful but only because there was no Kneelift. Rather, Crane stamped down on Harker’s toes and twisted her heel like she meant to mash ‘em to a pulp! Lucy wobbled back on instinct, leaving herself vulnerable for Mads’ Three Stooges-style Eye Poke. Catching a double fistful of dark hair when Harker tried to turn away, the Maiden of Mirth drove a Kneelift into her lower back, then smirked when she saw Jenny and Autumn controlling their Wicked foes with a Side Headlock and a Cravate respectively.
“Well this is awkward.” she said. “How in the name of Rankin & Bass did we ALL get each other nasty bytches for Christmas?!”
Sammain soaked up a quick punch from Mina, wrenched her neck for the effort. “It’s the thought that counts, Maddy. Now lets test ‘em out.”
Jacobs wasn’t quite sure what that meant until Autumn mirrored Crane’s grip and yanked Murray up on tiptoe. Following suit with Daphne, Jacobs rushed forward to make sure the Gatecrasher wouldn’t miss the meeting of the minds, those Wicked noggins THWONKING offa one another in beautiful three part harmony. Lucy, Mina and Daphne sagged against one another without bending the knee, so the aggressors yanked ‘em up on tiptoe and split off to three different sides whereupon they hurled their pernicious presents over the top rope to a thunderous reaction from the FAWNatics!
“MERRY CHRISTMAS YA FILTHY ANIMALS!” Crane bellowed to the throng from the perch on the middle rope she’d so recently claimed.
“You can quote Christmas Story later, Mads.” Autumn barked. “For now we’ve got witches to burn.”
Aghast with amaze and horror, Crane looked over one shoulder and said, “Jesus wept, Autumn. That’s--”
“She never remembers movies.” Jacobs interrupted. “Correct her after we‘ve won., for now the Dragon’s right.”
The former best friends exchanged a nod, then ran straight for one another only to zig at the last second. They ‘twanged’ offa the strands at the same time and crossed paths a second time en route to their original targets. Picking up on the intent about that time, Crane ran the ropes at her back just after blonde and brunette ‘crossed the streams’ so she was only a couple heartbeats behind in delivering the last of three Suicide Dives that drove their respective foes into the guardrail with a resounding BWAAANG!
Never one to let their foot off the gas when they had an opponent on the ropes, Sammain and Jacobs pounded a few quick punches into their rival’s foreheads before whipping ‘round and gliding back into the ring. “Seconds?” the NorCal Sensation asked the Joshi Phenom.
“Hell yeah.” Sammain glanced to Maddy, who was still applying liberal doses of knuckle to Harker’s pate. “Crane, get in here! Time for round two!”
“Coooooooming!” Maddy punctuated with a Bionic Elbow between the eyes, pushed clear of the groaning brunette and hopped onto the apron to rejoin her partners. What should’ve been a clear path grew surprisingly difficult when Lucy surged after her, grabbed hold of both ankles and yanked the unsuspecting battler straight to the flo--“NNNRRRRRGGGHH!”
Crane’s chin struck the edge of apron with such force it unhinged her knees. She would’ve crumpled to her butt then and there if Harker hadn’t caught her in a snug Waistlock. Quick to grind her chin into the soft flesh at the base of Maddy’s neck, Lucy leered up at Autumn and Jenny and hissed, “Want her, bytches? Come get her.” The cavalry came for Mads at once, unfortunately they weren’t quite fast enough to prevent Harker from claiming a hip-level straightjacket, Crane’s arms pulled tight against her own midsection when the Scandalous brunette took her up ‘n over with a German Suplex that BWAAAANGED the back of Maddy’s head and shoulders against the steel barricade!
STRAIGHTJACKET GERMAN SUPLEX:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=McFDD1hLzX8
Such a vile landing would’ve required mandatory gloating under a more rigid rule set, but Harker hadn’t even made it off one knee when Sammain and Jacobs converged on her with a veritable blizzard of elbows and Forearm Smashes. Once Lucy was subdued they dragged her up with a double handful of hair and--
Mina and Daphne struck like raptors with a pair of high Running Knees that struck Autumn and Jenny amidships to drive them together shoulder to shoulder. Neither went down, not that this concerned Dufresne or Murray in the slightest. Catching hold of their foes at trunks and tresses, the Wicked duo bumrushed Dragon and Innovator into the apron, their lower backs striking the unforgiving edge with an ugly THWHUMP!
“I swear these decorations get tackier every year.” Daphne said after driving Autumn’s spine into the apron a second time.
Mina mulled this over as she scrubbed her forearm across Jenny’s mouth and nose. “Sounds like you think our annual good deed should be a bit of ringside beautification.”
“It IS Christmas Eve, we’re kinda running out of time.”
“If you insist.”
As one, Mina and Daph scraped their prey off the ring and bustled them across the narrow aisle whereupon they promptly bowled over nearly a dozen front row FAWNatics with a pair of flying losers! All smiles now that the odds were heavily stacked in their favor, Dufresne and Murray helped Lucy to her feet and made a point of dusting some invisible grime from their friend’s shoulders.
“Thank you ladies, that was quite refreshing.” Lucy huffed. “Now let’s shear this sheep. Daph, Mina and I have the trenches covered, wanna take the high ground?”
“Always.”
The Gatecrasher hopped onto the apron and jogged down to the far end, giving Scandalous plenty of room to work. And work they did, Harker and Murray working with pitiless efficiency as they hauled Crane to her feet so Lucy could collect her in a one-armed Three Quarters Facelock.
“Bring it in, babe!” Mina beckoned. “Let’s put this stain right where she belongs!”
That was more than enough for Harker, who charged forward and flicked her right leg up for Murray to catch. What followed was a Scandalous sort of kick-flip that sent Lucy floating over and ultimately behind her prey, the brunette landing comfortably on her belly while poor Maddy was THWHUMPED down flat on her back! The thin blue mats might’ve absorbed the very worst of the Standing Shiranui, but it still hit hard enough to bounce Crane to a slumped seat on impact. Or perhaps it was more accurate to say it sat her up for a moment because the woozy redhead was still slopping forward when Murray rushed in and THWHONKED the point of her right knee into Crane’s exposed forehead!
WICKED TEAMWORK @ 1:37
www.youtube.com/watch?v=0rhk1G365ow
Mina spun away from her victim only adopt a sweeping sort of game show starlet sort of pose that drew the crowd’s attention to Daphne Dufresne as she started her sprint down the apron. Moving with incredible confidence despite the narrowness of the runway, the Gatecrasher took flight, crunched in on herself and stretched out full length approximately half a heartbeat before she THWHAMMED down on Maddy’s chest in a vicious Frog Splash!
APRON FROG SPLASH:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=c5szrznT9DA
The New Yorker’s legs bounced up but Dufresne swatted them aside, the lithesome brunette far more concerned with joining her Wicked Sisters in throwing up those infuriating W’s. “THAT’S HOW IT’S DONE, LOSERS!” Daphne shouted to the throng once she’d exchanged high fives with her partners. She would’ve continued in that vein if a rumble from the front row drew their combined attention to Jenny and Autumn, who were clambering their way clear of the scattered tangle of chairs and fans.
“You got that?” D² asked Lucy.
“But of course.” Harker replied. “You work on mincing the ginger. Mina and I will handle salty and bland here.” Satisfied, Daphne scraped Maddy up by trunks and tresses, then bundled her under the bottom rope and rolled in after while Scandalous moved to engage the rest of the sheeple.
Intercepting their quarries at the barricade with a nasty little handful of hair, Harker and Murray CLAPPED stereo Bytch Slaps offa opposing cheeks to ensure they were too overwhelmed with Christmas cheer to resist when they turned them toward one another and-- Jacobs & Sammain locked hands in an impromptu Test of Strength that effectively neutralized a retaliatory meeting of the minds. And speaking of interesting mental phenomena, Jenny & Autumn demonstrated a beautiful bit of Tag Team ESP when they halved the Knuckle-Locks to drive identical back elbows into Scandalous chins!
Lucy and Mina rocked back on their heels, but neither relinquished their hair-holds which made it that much easier for their foes to reel them in for Front Facelocks. Practically shoulder to shoulder, Sensation & Phenom threw their foe’s near arm across their shoulders, then grabbed a handful of red trunks and hoisted them up and over for-- Jacobs made it all the way to the floor which meant Harker did too, the Scandalous brunette crashing down on a litter of chairs and a few FAWNatics too foolish to vacate the area. Mina Murray however hooked onto the barricade to stay rooted in place, then curled that hand into a fist and sent half a dozen punches into Autumn’s ribs.
“Let go of me you scrawny, whey-faced bytcOOFFFHHH!”
Sammain went up on tiptoe, then dropped to a deep squat which meant her blonde was driven chest-first into the top of the steel guardrail. Autumn enjoyed the sound so much she repeated it twice more and when she straightened up the give in Murray’s legs told her she was the only thing keeping the blonde upright. Releasing the Facelock, the Dragon of Tokyo turned Mina around and draped her arms over the barricade so she was looking into the overhead lights. Cupping Murray’s chin with one hand, she pulled the blonde’s head back and laid a single tart Forearm Smash across that proud California rack.
“Shouldn’t of told me to let you go, asshole.” Sammain chided. “Now I’ve got both hands free to hit ya.”
Still breathless from the awkward collision, Mina’s response was long on ‘tude, short on believability. “Duuuhhh… do your worst, Sammy. We both know you hit like a white beNNGGGHH!”
Jenny Jacobs stepped in on the left and brought that hand CRAAACKING down on Murray’s exposed tummy! “You gonna let her talk to you like that?” the former World Champion asked her former tag team partner.
“No. I was going to let her finish, then cave her teeth in. Thanks for spoiling yet another moment for me, Jacobs.”
Jenny’s eyes narrowed and she opened her mouth to say something but ultimately thought better of it. After a moment, she muttered, “Stop wasting time. Crane needs all the help she can get.” With that she hopped over the barricade and THUMPED a Kneelift into Murray’s exposed midriff en route to sliding under the bottom rope.
Biting back hard words of her own, Autumn straightened up the listing blonde just to jab a Headbutt into the base of her neck! Mina cried out and crumpled to all fours, allowing the brunette to join her partners un-accosted.
At about the time Lucy & Mina were feasting on knuckle sandwiches, Daphne Dufresne was scraping Maddy Crane off the mat with a double handful of hair that she transitioned to Wristlock only after reminding Nick Castle that she did so of her own goddamned volition. “Beating your punk ass is never going to carry the cache of humbling those other two bytches.” Dufresne admitted as she stuffed a shoulder into the redhead’s sternum. “But there’s just something about shutting your mouth that’s sublimely satisfying.”
A lack of response from the usually jocular battler only spurred Daphne to put that much more ‘oomph!’ on the Irish Whip that sent Crane racing at the far corner. The triple team hangover meant Mads had no chance of countering or even slowing down, though she managed a drunken half-turn which meant her back took the worst of the BWUUUNGING collision. The Queen of the Facebusters Tribe bounced away from the buckles and might’ve done a full-on Flair Flop if she hadn’t caught hold of the top rope in both hands. This act of self preservation proved far more detrimental than she would’ve liked when Daphne flew in with her right elbow crooked back somewhere behind her ear for an Elbow Smash that did just that to the redhead’s jaw!
Mads tottered but still wasn’t allowed to collapse because D² hooked her right arm across the New Yorker’s chest while simultaneously dipping her head beneath Crane’s right arm. Using that hook to draw the other woman away from the corner, Daphne cinched her left arm around the back of Maddy’s left thigh, then popped her hips to dump the Happy Anarchist on the back of her head and shoulders with an Exploder so good it was Wicked.
ELBOW SMASH & EXPLODER SUPLEX:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=84OUs8x1l7o
Maddy tumbled to another weary seat that she didn’t get to enjoy for more than a couple of seconds before Dufresne dragged her back to verticality. Now aware of Scandalous’ problems on the outside of the ring (she’d just watched that washed up troll Jacobs Suplex poor Lucy into the third or fourth row) the Gatecrasher displayed a great deal of urgency as she muscled Crane onto her shoulders for a Fireman’s Carry. “They’re not gonna save you in time, bytch.” Daphne taunted her prey. “Not that they’re trying particularly haNGH! NGH! NGH!”
Say what you will about Madeline Crane, she’d never needed anyone to save her, as she demonstrated to Dufresne by slamming several elbows into the side of the brunette’s skull. Staggered sideways by this unexpected resistance, Daph tottered into the strands and made the best of a bad situation by simply dumping Mads over the top rope! That was the intention anyway, but the Glad Bomber loved nothing more than thwarting the best laid plans so it wasn’t all that surprising when she caught hold of the rubber-coated steel and pulled herself into an awkward landing on the apron.
Her attention divided by the redhead on her six and the blonde that’d just slid under the bottom rope, Dufresne spat a curse and whipped around on her heel to unleash a big Haymaker aimed at Crane’s temp-- Maddy blocked the shot with her forearm, caught a big handful of hair and drilled a Headbutt into the bridge of Daphne’s nose! Already unsteady after that flurry of elbows, Dufresne reeled away from the Merry Prankster as fast as she could only to feel a strong hand clamp down on one shoulder after only a few steps. Daphne didn’t even get a chance to defend herself this time, as the unseen attacker simply spun her ‘round in a half circle and ‘OOOOHHHHH!’ Simultaneous surprise and pleasure from a whole host of lapsed Jacobites when their former leader hopped up, caught Daphne across the back of the head and pulled her down into a rude collision with the point of her right knee!
SINGLE KNEE FACEBUSTER:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=guzBykHSBfM
The Facebuster made Dufresne sway in place but she didn’t go down, so the Innovator hooked an arm across the back of the neck and doubled her over for a few quick Kneelifts to the gut. “Look alive, Crane.” Double J barked at her teammate (she couldn’t bring herself to think of Maddy as a partner), “there’s garbage coming your way!”
Mads answered by seizing the middle strands in both hands, so Jenny clouted Daph’s chin with a European Uppercut that put her up on tiptoe and started her tottering toward the ropes. Noting the Gatecrasher’s approach, Maddy launched herself into the squared circle with a flawless forward roll that segued into a perfect vertical leap. Mads caught herself a whole lotta hair at the apex, then kicked her legs out in a ‘V’ and dropped to her butt to THWONK Dufresne’s mug into the mat with a gorgeous Sit-Out Facebuster! The leftover momentum bounced Daphne onto her back and Crane went for a cover at once, a display of aggression that Jacobs would’ve appreciated in pretty much anyone else. Regardless, it didn’t stop Nick from swooping in to count…
ROLLING THUNDER SIT-OUT FACEBUSTER:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=fKk3vYvjvXY
ONE…
TWO…
Dufresne kicked free just after ‘TWO!’
“Keep your forearm on her jaw next time, Crane.” Jacobs muttered. “It’ll make it harder for her to fight you off.”
“I know how to pin a brat, JJ.” Maddy snapped. “After all, I pinned you.”
“You snotty little--”
“EASY.” Autumn stepped between Crane and Jacobs, forcing them to pull away. “We can bytch at one another after the bell rings, for now we need to put this one away before Harker and Murray recover.”
Jenny took a look around and spotted Mina at once, the blonde was slumped against the ring-post nearest the steps watching the interior with pale, hating eyes. Lucy was nowhere to be seen, though some commotion in the first few rows suggested she was still fighting out from under the chairs. The NorCal Sensation’s attention returned to the ring when she realized Autumn was still talking.
“Mads I want you in that corner, Jenny you take the opposite. On my signal you’re both gonna come off the top,” to Jenny, “you with an Elbow,” then Maddy, “and you with a Senton. Got it?”
“What’s the signal?” Crane asked.
“You’ll know. Now GO!”
Blonde and redhead did as commanded, hurrying to far corners while Sammain hair-hauled Daphne to all fours. A single pitiless knee to the side of the head ensured utter compliance from the other brunette, so Autumn pulled her all the way to verticality, then slipped an arm between her thighs and scooped her onto one shoulder for a Body Sl- the Dragon of Tokyo sat out to just DRILL the back of her opponent’s neck and shoulders into the thinly-sheathed plywood with a Michinoku Driver II!
MICHINOKU DRIVER II:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=oqqvZBrIaYk
The groan from the crowd told her they wanted to see a cover, but Sammain wasn’t about to countermand her own--
“LOOK OUT, JJ!” Autumn looked to Crane first, then to Jenny which meant she had perhaps half a second to register the chair Lucy Harker had flung at the precariously perched blonde! Jenny didn’t even get a chance to shift before the weaponized steel BWAAANGED against the exposed curve of her lower back! Shrieking in surprise and pain, Jacobs took a header to the canvas, landing awkwardly on her right hip and shoulder.
“Stay on Dufresne, Crane.” Autumn was already moving. “I got this bytch.”
Maddy didn’t so much as peep, rather she sank into a deep crouch and sprang out into the lights, the redhead ultimately leeeaaaning back and pulling both knees up under her chin for the Senton that THWHAMMED down atop Daphne’s chest! Unwilling to risk the Phenom’s wrath by coming to her aid, Mads rolled over into a Crossbody and hooked the far leg for…
DIVING SENTON:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=VOKb-Rh_mW8
ONE…
TWO…
THRNOOOO!
Video review later confirmed that Dufresne did kick out, but it was really Mina Murray’s perfectly placed Double Axehandle that deserved the credit for keeping Wicked in the match.
“Ooooohhhhh, so close!” the Scandalous blonde sneered as she plunged both hands into her opponent’s hair. “Don’t worry loser, I hear Santa’s bringing you a Participation Award this yeOWW! NGH! NGH! NGH!”
Maddy let Mina bring ‘em both to their feet before she casually stomped a heel down on Murray’s toes! This she followed with two straight rights to the dome, as well as a short Shoulderblock to the tits that Mina stacked against the ropes because Crane just kept coming. “I already know what Santa’s bringing me, beeyotch.” Maddy teased. “A necklace made of your teeth!”
The Smiling Knight stepped back and dropped a hip to shoot her blonde across the ring with an Irish NO! Mina reversed the momentum of the Whip, sending Crane to the strands in her stead. Mads made the journey without comment, indeed she returned moving considerably faster than when she THWHACK! Right shoulder pointed at the oncoming redhead, Murray took to the skies in a gorgeous vertical leap that got really ugly when she flicked her right leg up ‘n out to smash that calf into Maddy’s mouth and nose. The New Yorker went down like she’d been clipped by a Pandora Clothesline and there she stayed while Mina sprawled across her chest for the…
SCANDALOUS SIDE KICK:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=G-PtX0iKlqA
ONE…
TWO…
Crane powered out just after ‘TWO!’ and didn’t even get a chance to appreciate her freedom because Murray immediately sidled into a seat directly above her so she could trap the redhead’s noggin in a Headscissors! “Choke on it, Sugar Plum Freak.” the blonde demanded. “Or tap a festive little fa-la-la, I don’t give a shyt!”
Maddy’d just put a big ‘ol divot in Daphne’s sternum when Autumn dropped to one knee beside Jenny Jacobs. Dark eyes locked on Lucy Harker (who returned the gaze with equal intensity) Sammain touched a hand to the blonde’s shoulder and asked, “You ok Jacobs?”
“I’ll be fine.” the Innovator grunted through clenched teeth. “Save me a little of Harker’s fat ass, would’ja?”
“No promises.”
The Gaijin Extraordinaire slipped through the ropes to the floor below and went straight for Lucy, who had reclaimed the chair she’d used to knock Jenny out of the sky. Ceding ground at precisely the same rate Sammain claimed it, Harker taunted, “Awwwwww, does the big bad Dragon still get the feels when someone hurts her old partner? You remember what she did to you, right Sammain? Bytch cost you the World Title. What’d we ever do? Just beat your skinny ass a few times, no big--”
Instead of saying ‘deal’ Harker lowered the chair and drove the rounded top edge straight at Autumn’s tummy. But Sammain had expected just this sort of duplicity so she threw her hips backward and caught hold of the chair no fuss, no muss. “I’ll never forget what she cost me, Harker.” Autumn growled. “But that doesn’t mean you can…”
Sammain trailed off into thunderstruck silence when Lucy leaned forward over the chair and spit in the other brunette’s face. “THAT’S what she did to you, sweetie. Doesn’t feel good, does HURK!”
The Dragon released her hold on the chair to clamp down on Harker’s throat. While this choice filled her with immense satisfaction, it proved poor strategy because the Scandalous brunette simply stabbed the chair into the pit of her stomach! Sammain stumbled back but didn’t go down, so Lucy jabbed her again, then tilted the chair down at a near forty-five degree angle and drove that rounded edge into the top of her attacker’s left foot!
Autumn shrieked, pivoted on that now throbbing foot and drove her right knee into Harker’s ribs with enough force to make her drop the chair. The loss of her weapon didn’t trouble Harker for more than a moment, as that’s when she crooked one hand into a claw and slashed it across Sammain’s eyes. Even then Sammain wouldn’t release the other brunette’s neck, but her misty-eyed thrashing couldn’t prevent Lucy from treating herself to a double handful of Joshi locks. A glance over one shoulder told Harker she was right where she wanted to be, then a few quick steps backward put Autumn exactly where she did not want to be, namely a BWONKING forehead on steel collision with the ring-post!
Sammain’s legs gave out on impact, she certainly would’ve collapsed to her knees if she hadn’t draped one leaden arm over the bottom rope. “Ooooohhhh, are you just too tuff to go down, Dragon?” Harker scoffed. “Bet you’re not!”
Plunging her hands into Autumn’s hair again, Lucy cranked her prey’s head back and proceeded to BWONK it against the post no less than half a dozen times! A continuation of this technique would’ve paid dividends in seconds almost assuredly, yet when Lucy yanked Sammain away from the corner she was still vertical. Head already dipped, Harker wedged it beneath the Gaijin’s left arm and looped her right arm around Autumn’s waist. With her free hand against the back of Sammain’s left thigh, Lucy lifted the woozy bendyback onto the ball of one shoulder then stepped close to the ring and simply DROPPED Autumn spine-first along the narrow apron!
The crowd cringed right along with the Joshi Phenom, though their backs didn’t arch like they’d been touched with a cattle-prod. “Crawl in a hole and die, Sammain.” Harker cooed down at the vulnerable wrestler. “Abandon Jacobs like she abandoned you. She’s ours noHUURRRGGGHH!”
Damned if Autumn didn’t grab her by the throat and start to squeeze! Thinking fast despite the abrupt oxygen shortage, Lucy buried one hand in Sammain’s hair and pressed the other against her thigh to shove her lower body under the bottom rope. Doubling down on the hair-hold once this was done, Harker tugged / yanked Autumn partway down the edge, then pounded a knee into the back of her head until the Dragon’s hateful hand fell away.
“You still care about her, that’s cute. It really is.” Lucy huffed once she’d reclaimed a Sammain’s hair. “Then you can die on that hill with her!” The Scandalous battler tugged Autumn to the left, then whipped her in the opposite direction with such force that the lissome brunette swept around in what would’ve been a full circle if the side of her head hadn’t BWONKED offa the ring-post! No cry from Autumn now, she just shuddered and rolled off the apron to land at Harker’s feet with a damp thud.
“Sleep tight, lizard breath.”
Back in the squared circle, Maddy Crane had maneuvered her way onto all fours, though it’d cost her a great deal of energy to do so. She was plotting a handstand escape when a freshly vertical and extremely angry Daphne Dufresne snatched a handful of her green bottoms and YANKED them up in a Wicked wedgie!
“That’s what you get, BYTCH!” the Gatecrasher shouted as both she and Mina set to paddling the redhead’s defenseless cheeks. “Have you figured out you can’t f*cking hang with Wick--”
Jenny Jacobs (also freshly vertical) cinched a Waistlock around Dufresne’s slim hips and took her up, over and down with a German Suplex that PLANTED the brunette on the back of her head and shoulders!
Castle started to close in for the count but this proved unnecessary as the NorCal Sensation rolled onto her knees and clambered back to boot-leather with Daphne still hanging in her grasp. Trading her full Waistlock for a Half & Half (the other half being a Nelson) Double J got low and “NNNNNNGGGGHHH!” Daphne put an end to the blonde’s plans by whipping her right foot back through Jacobs’ legs for a nauseating Low Blow!
Twisting free of Jenny’s hold the instant her heel made contact with opposing trunks, Dufresne slipped ‘round behind and secured an identical grip to the one she’d just escaped. Well, not exactly identical, as the Girl of 8,675,309 Holds hadn’t made it a point to squeeze and claw her opponent’s breasts. “Were you actually going to toss me with a Half Nelson Suplex?” Daphne hissed in Jacobs’ ear as the mauling continued. “Allow me to explain what happens to the sheep that tries to poach my moves!” Said explanation proved extremely succinct, as D² got low, then popped her hips to pitch Jacobs through the aether with a Half Nelson Suplex that THWHAMMED the former World Champion down flat on her face, chest and belly!
HALF NELSON SUPLEX:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=Em7LxxgItoY
Dufresne might’ve snuggled in for a cover if Murray hadn’t called out, “Daphne dear, would you be so kind as to boot this ass for me?”
The ass in question belonged to Maddy Crane and it was still pointed at the rafters after Daphne’s assisting wedgie. More than happy to oblige the blonde’s request, Dufresne scrambled to her feet and ran the ropes to ensure an appropriately Wicked head of steam by the time she hopped up and THWHAPPED a Dropkick against those undefended haunches! Mina’d had her hips elevated in anticipation of just such a shot and now she brought them down which in turn drove the crown of Crane’s skull against the mat in a sort of truncated DDT.
The cruelly creative combination finally bounced Mads free from her gammy confinement, though she didn’t have the energy to do much more than roll onto her back. Daphne had just offered a hand to Mina when Lucy slid under the bottom rope and rose to her feet. “Ya know Daph, I think you were a bit harsh earlier. I’d say the decorations look GREAT this year!” Harker was all smiles as she surveyed the wreckage of Jacobs and Crane.
“Yeah, who knew a little scuffing would take the tacky right off?” Mina agreed.
“Where’s the Dragon?” Daphne asked the other brunette.
“Trying to put her skull back together, I’d imagine. It’ll take her a while. Tell me Daph, have you ever made a wish on the wishbone after a big meal?”
“Can’t say as I have.”
“Oh, you simply must! Here, Mina and I will help.”
Stalking over to Maddy, Lucy stomped on her gut a few times, then slipped that boot underneath her ribs and rolled her onto her stomach. From there a handful of hair brought her to all fours, but Harker relinquished that grip in favor of claiming the redhead’s right ankle. “Ok, you grab her other foot and we’ll this party started!” Dufresne didn’t have to ask about Murray’s role in all of this, the Scandalous blonde was already sauntering into position against the nearest set of strands. Seizing hold of Crane’s boot just as Harker had suggested, Daphne mirrored her movements to Lucy’s so it only a matter of heartbeats until they had Mads hoisted up in an involuntary handstand made all the more awkward because the heartless brunettes had wrenched her legs in opposite directions.
Tapping an insolent finger to one ear as the crowd started to jeer, Mina looked at Daphne and purred, “Make a wish, dear.”
The exact details of Dufresne’s wish are unfit to print here, suffice to say it was granted in cringe-inducing fashion when Mina charged off the strands and sprang into the air, the blonde’s right leg whipping up over her head before she brought it THWHUMPING down onto the fork of Maddy’s crotch. Crane sobbed and collapsed into a fetal ball or at least tried. She hadn’t even finished drawing into herself when Murray shoved her onto her back and collected the far leg for…
ONE…
TWO…
THRNOOOO!
Jenny roared in from deep in left field with a low-flying Shoulderblock that knocked the other blonde off her prey with a whisper to spare! The FAWNatics cheered mightily for this last second reprieve, though Wicked put a quick damper on their spirits by burying the Innovator beneath an avalanche of stomps, short Knee Drops and Double Axehandles.
“Meddling sheep.” Lucy scuffed Jacobs’ mouth with a heartless Forearm Smash, then grabbed a double handful of hair and dragged her to her knees. “I’ll teach you to turn us doOFH! OOFH! OOOFH!”
Desperate for some separation, Jenny palmed Lucy’s hips so she could stuff a Headbutt into the pit of her stomach. This she followed with a pair of clipped Uppercuts, each landing flush against her opponent’s navel. They did in fact force Harker back on her heels, but Double J wasn’t able to capitalize because Dufresne & Murray chose that moment to THW-THWHACK a pair of Low Super Kicks into either side of the blonde’s skull!
Jenny toppled to all fours and might’ve settled out even lower if Lucy hadn’t resumed her previous hard-hearted hair tugging. Once the brat was upright Harker sidled in against her right flank and trapped that arm in a Half Nelson. Her other hand secured a grip on Jacobs’ trunks just above her left hip, meaning the NorCal Sensation wasn’t going anywhere when Mina snuggled in to claim an identical grip on the opposite side. Swinging their burden around so they were all facing Daphne, Lucy said, “Put a fresh dent in her fugly little face, won’t you dear?”
The Gatecrasher stepped in, caught a handful of hair and forced scathing eye contact with the trapped blonde while she teasingly brushed at a spot on her chin. “Consider it Dnnngghhh!”
Jenny blasted her with a Kneelift just beneath the navel and immediately brought that heel down on the brunette’s toes! “Get the f*ck outta my face you gutless little--”
Daphne answered with a Super Kick to Jacobs’ defenseless face, the crisp THWHACK acting as a starter pistol for Scandalous, who dipped down and popped their hips to spike the Innovator on the back of her head as the latest victim of the Morningsidewinder. The vicious triple team left Jenny folded up in a boneless Matchbook that allowed both Lucy and Mina to pile onto those upturned haunches for the…
MORNINGSIDEWINDER:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=dux6YbpMjkw
ONE…
TWO…
THRENOOOOOOOO!
Now it was Maddy’s turn to save Christmas, a feat she accomplished with a ramshackle tackle to Daphne that sent the both of them sprawling into their stacked partners!
“GODDAMMIT!” Dufresne roared in frustration as she clambered outta the thrashing collection of bodies. “C’mere you meddling bytch!”
Snagging Mads with a double handful of hair, she muscled her to boot-leather, then dropped a shoulder and ‘hupped’ Crane up ‘n across in a Fireman’s Carry. Careful to get clear of the three fallen ladies, Daph swung ‘round in a circle to make sure everyone knew she was in total control. Once that was established she tossed Maddy onto her feet then planted on her left heel and damned near kicked the redhead’s noggin offa her shoulders with a vicious Roundhouse!
STARRY EYED @ 00:18
www.youtube.com/watch?v=FEFzLzKf9LA
Starry Eyed in the aftermath of that brutal head-shot, Maddy landed flat on her face, but Dufresne didn’t try for a cover. Instead she kicked Crane onto her back before stomping over to Jacobs so she could collect the blonde’s wrists. A round of enthusiastic tugging put the pair of rivals beside one another with the full strength of Wicked assembled overhead.
“You knocked out the Dragon, yeah?” Daphne asked Lucy.
“Left her drooling on the floor by that corner. If she’s not here getting her ass kicked, she’s out.”
“Perfect. You two go up top, these sheep need a little 450 magic to brighten their sad little lives.”
“A wonderful idea!” Mina clapped her hands. “After you, Lucy dear.”
Scandalous set off for the corner in lockstep, blonde and brunette only slowing their progress to favor the crowd with pageant wave middle fingers. Dufresne watched with obvious amusement, though she was also careful to keep an eye out for Sammain and occasionally administer a stomp to Jenny or Maddy, lest they think about trying to escape.
Neither did, meaning the atmosphere in the FAWN Arena was downright grim when Harker and Murray ascended to the top turnbuckle via each side of the ring-post. Grim or not, they offered Scandalous a grudging murmur of respect when blonde and brunette hooked an arm over one another’s shoulders and stood tall in the high rent district.
Eyes alight with evil anticipation, Lucy cooed, “And I heard them exclaim as they drove out of sight…”
“Get these miserable pieces of shyt otta my ring!” Mina finished for her. “After all, it’s Chrism--”
A thunderous roar from those in attendance when a coal-eyed Autumn Sammain leapt from the floor to the apron to the second rope in the span between heartbeats. Harker and Murray both turned to look at the interloper, a decision that proved rather disastrous as it allowed the Gaijin Extraordinaire to catch both of them both with a single spewed plume of Green Mist!
Yowling in two-part outrage, Scandalous’ situation went from dire to calamitous because Autumn gifted them with a single shove that sent blonde and brunette hurling from their perch to THAWHAM-KERHASH through the poor defenseless Announce Table!
Patently disgusted by this Christmas Miracle, Daphne Dufresne sprinted at the Dragon of Tokyo with every intention of caving in her face with a single smiting elb--PFWOOOOOOOSH!
Sammain caught her coming in with a second dose of the Green Mist! Stopped dead in her tracks, the Gatecrasher pawed and swiped at her eyes, meaning she was effectively defenseless when Autumn tagged her across the temple with a Roundhouse delivered from her spot on the apron. D² stumbled around in a wobbly arc and retreated toward the center of the ring in search of a place to clear her stinging eyNO!
Maddy Crane planted a Kneelift between the brunette’s thighs, slapped on a Front Facelock and slung Daphne’s left arm over her shoulders. Just like that she hoisted Dufresne to about three o’clock, then twisted around in a tight little circle and laid out on her belly to PLANT the Wicked warrior face-first with Insult 2 Injury!
INSULT 2 INJURY @ 2:38
www.youtube.com/watch?v=iy-Rh9DcrV0
Daphne jolted violently but Crane didn’t let her roll onto her back. Instead she hurried to verticality with Dufresne still in her grasp. Spotting Jenny pushing off her knees, Mads called, “Hey JJ!” Don’t say I never got ya anything!”
Crane transitioned to a Wristlock and just slung the glassy-eyed brunette straight at the Girl of 8,675,309 Holds. It wasn’t a whole lotta time to react, but Jacobs didn’t shy away from her ‘gift’ in fact she ran at Daphne, threaded her right arm across the taller wrestler’s chest and threw herself into a gorgeous back-flip that THAWHAMMED Dufresne down flat on the thinly-sheathed plywood!
JENNYCIDE:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=j9NtUUxaamY
Jenny reared back on her haunches, started to go for the cover, then paused when she noticed Autumn back inside the ring. Collecting a big handful of the Gatecrasher’s hair, Jenny peeled her off the mat and grabbed a wrist. “Normally I wouldn’t re-gift, but tonight I’ll make an exception. Merry Christmas, Autumn.”
Jacobs offered her gift via Irish Whip and Sammain accepted gratefully, the lissome brunette greeting Dufresne with a single quick Back Elbow to the mouth. Daphne’s head snapped back and she turned away from this latest attack, the sole surviving Wicked witch seemingly unaware that she was surrounded. Autumn was happy to remind her though, as she sidled in behind and dipped her head beneath the stunned brunette’s right arm. Curling her left arm around Dufresne’s chest so she could press a palm to the other woman’s chest. In the same breath she threaded her other hand between Daphne’s legs and hoisted / spun her through a nauseating one-eighty! Catching Dufresne around the waist in the heartbeat before gravity could bring her down, Sammain squeezed tight and sped the descent by sitting out full force, her butt meeting the mat with a soft thump that was completely overwhelmed by the heavy THWONK of Daphne’s skull against the thinly-sheathed plywood!
AUTUMN RAIN:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=AFXvzqh_-Ps
Dufresne crumpled in on herself and might’ve stayed that way all night if Sammain hadn’t rolled her onto her back and slid in place across the starfished brunette’s chest. Autumn pressed a palm against Daph’s cheek but didn’t bother to hook the far leg. This might’ve constituted a lackadaisical cover if first Maddy and then Jenny hadn’t crowded in from behind, Prankster and Innovator both pressing their palms on Autumn’s back while Castle and his Christmas chorus belted out that old favorite…
ONE…
TWO…
THREE!
Autumn maintained her perch, Jenny threw up a pair of J’s and Maddy crowded the ropes to make sure she had a good look at Scandalous when the Announcer confirmed, “Ladies and gentlemen, your winners via pin-fall, JENNY JACOBS, MADDY CRANE AND AUTUMN SAMMAIN!”
Delighted to see Lucy and Mina barely stirring amidst the rubble of the table, Maddy strode back to Autumn and extended a hand to help the victorious Dragon off her slumbering adversary. “And just how good did THAT feel, Nin-jor?” Crane asked with weary.
“Amazing.” Sammain admitted. “Still want her one on one, though.”
“Get in line.” Maddy replied, her smile fading a little. “Chick’s got a lot of receipts coming.”
“And mine comes first.” Crane and Sammain rounded on Jenny, who didn’t blanch beneath their combined glares. “Bytch cost me the World Title.” Jacobs continued. “That takes precedence, as far as I’m concerned.”
“You mean YOU take precedence.” Maddy snapped. “Why am I not surprised by this take on the situat--”
“Shut your mouth, Crane.” Jacobs interrupted. “It’s not like you’d understand what it meant to lose out on--”
“On the World Title?” Crane’s voice bristled with anger. “Oh no, I wouldn’t know ANYTHING about that! Neither would Autumn. Oh wait, that’s right! There was that one greedy bytch that screwed BOTH of us out of the big belt! F*ck, what was that piece of shyt’s na--”
Jenny surged forward only to stop when Autumn moved between them. “Stop it, both of you.” she murmured. “This is the same counterproductive shyt that let Wicked put us down before.”
Crane and Jacobs didn’t advance, but they didn’t retreat either. There was clearly still some bad blood between the longtime rivals.
After another few seconds of silence, Autumn went on. “We won tonight, that’s what’s important. And as far as I’m concerned, there’s more than enough of Daphne Dufresne to go around. Now stop glaring at each other and let me raise your hands.”
Maddy and Jenny ultimately did their partner one better, they took a wrist each and lifted Autumn’s arms in jaunty ‘V’. The FAWNatics responded with resounding cheer that grew that much louder when Sammain returned the favor for blonde and redhead.
In the end their victory was more a temporary ceasefire than Christmas miracle and no one’s heart grew ten sizes, but it still ended with Wicked looking up at those glorious lights and that was more than enough for the Joshi Phenom.