Post by dsb on May 13, 2019 18:09:42 GMT
Having bucked the odds at March to War, walking away with a win in a triple threat match where they were the underdogs among all parties involved, the FAWNatics’ favorites hop in place behind the curtain.
The nervous energy in the youngsters is evident as they wait for their cue to take the Spring Break ring and put an end to Collusion’s reign at the tag team top.
Settling and turning to each other, blonde and brunette share a warm embrace and whisper a few words of encouragement. Though far from the betting choice, at least the challengers’ would only have to beat one team to make their dream a reality.
The FAWNatics explode with excitement as Taylor Swift’s ‘Style’ plays over the arena speakers.
(https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-CmadmM5cOk )
A moment later, a stunning, dimpled platinum blonde bursts through the curtains, the crowd raising the decibels to outrageous levels.
CHARLIE DAWSON
The grappler cups a hand to an ear, daring the throng to get louder still and, when the blushing blonde drops to one knee to show the capacity crowd her partner standing behind, they manage.
The frenetic Lil’est Mitchell waves her arms upward, beckoning the FAWNatics to keep the love coming. Charlie raises her hands high and the babyfaced brunette laces her fingers with her fellow Sweetheart.
SKYLAR MITCHELL
Skye pulls her partner up and they pivot into an adorable hug, their foreheads pressing together, words exchanged under the roar of the crowd, the beloved duo no doubt acknowledging how important the chance they have tonight is.
The ring announcer makes the gravity of the situation clear.
“The following contest is scheduled for one fall, with a thirty minute time limit, and is for the FAWN Tag Team Championships! Introducing first, the challengers, at a total combined weight of two-hundred and twenty-six pounds ... Charlie Dawson... Skylar Mitchell, you know them, you love them, you can’t live without them... AMMMEEERRRIIICCCAAA’S SWWWEEEETTTHHHEEEAAARRRTTTSSS!”
Having left jobberdom well behind, it was time for the Sweethearts to take the next and ultimate step. They break from their huddle and head for the ring, Charlie and Skylar making it a point to slap EVERY single hand offered their way.
Reaching the squared circle, the Darling of the Desert and the Lil’est Mitchell slide under the bottom rope, spring to their feet and unzip their hot pink hoodies, Charlie slips hers off to reveal a light blue fightin’ two piece that, in spite of its somewhat modest and innocent cut still manages to raise the blood pressure of quite a few spectators. For her part, Skye sports a royal purple lycra bikini top and short shorts, with white pads and boots, the old school fans no doubt noting the distinct similarity in Skylar’s togs with the gear worn by her older sister Cynthia at the beginning of her career.
Charlotte and Skye share a high-five center stage as their music fades. They move to their corner, taking a moment to adjust their togs before intermittently stretching and waving, readying for the opportunity to send Collusion to the back pages.
With the saccharine Sweet-tarts situated, the arena’s speakers spark to life with the pounding of “America, Fuck Yeah” from Team America World Police, and the crowd is brought back to life as with shock therapy.
(https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7R5A0pg4oN8 )
Blue America’s least favorite, little blonde antagonist strides to center stage. Beside her is the woman she’d introduced to the big time and used to become and stay a champion, Kira Koslova. The Fox&Friendly blonde and the Russian redhead scan the proletariat, each with a golden championship belt slung over a shoulder.
POLLY LOCKWOOD
KIRA KOSLOVA
The women raise their trophies high and the increasing number of ‘Polly Patriots’ rise in support, the Star Spangled Bytch collecting more of the president’s base with each successive victory. Still in the minority, the Patriots salute their leader, her partner and their anthem. The far from silent majority make themselves known in completely different fashion, jeering the obnoxious xenophobe and her Russian ruffian.
The flaxen-haired hardbody brings a crisp salute to her brow to signal her troops then lets the liberal snowflakes know what she thinks of them by fashioning the knife-edge into a salute of the middle finger variety.
The True American is in her own brand of battle fatigues, Polly proudly sporting her customary hot pants and bikini top. Lockwood alternates her country’s colors between a shiny, eye catching blue topside, white stars prominently placed in the appropriate spots; and shimmering red and white-striped spandex below, the space age polymer barely covering her biscuit butt. She finishes the ensemble with gleaming white pads and boots.
Lockwood sports her customary cape, Old Glory draped over her shoulders.
She turns and accepts her new partner in a literal Russian bear hug. As the crowd’s jeers rise in volume, the duo separate and start down the ramp to defend their titles.
Kira throws off a full length grey fur coat and white wool hat to reveal a simple red one piece, with one unusual aspect — a cutout pattern displaying a portion of Kira’s tanned, toned abdomen in the form of a hammer and sickle, Koslova embracing her dictatorial roots even more forcefully than her hero, President Vlad. White pads and boots, the footwear with red hammer-and-sickles, complete the rookie’s attire.
Shoulder to shoulder, the international team march confidently to the ring, Polly occasionally jawing with the fans who’ve watched too much fake news and saluting those with enough common sense to understand she’s the best this country and thus the world has ever produced. Koslova is a picture of former Soviet stoicism, ignoring the hate emanating from the FAWNatics, steering clear of them altogether as she tramps to the squared circle.
Reaching the ring, Lockwood is energized next to her powerful ally, as she informs the challengers that in this country, HER COUNTRY, there’s no room for sweethearts, only motherfuckin’ warriors. When a smartass call out from the first row to ask Polly if she has bone spurs, Lockwood threatens to have the man deported. The comparatively calm Koslova pulls Polly away from the altercation and the Russian leads her teammate up the steps as the announcer makes their introduction.
“And their opponents...hailing from Buffalo, New York and St. Petersburg, Russia, respectively, at a combined weight of two hundred and forty pounds…the FAWN tag team champions…Polly Lockwood and Kira Koslova, together they commit COLLUSION!”
Koslova sits on the middle cable and pushes the top upward to make room for her partner in crime and success. Polly dives through the opening, landing on her hands and rolling through a somersault, the momentum of which she uses to pop to her feet. Kira swings her legs through, climbs off the middle rope and strides to the Pernicious Patriot in less dramatic fashion.
Kira hands a microphone to Polly then relieves Lockwood of her banner/cape, neatly folding the Stars-n-Stripes and placing it in Collusion’s corner.
“There’s only one way to explain it,” Lockwood announces. “Pure stupid luck.”
The reaction from the crowd shows Polly would lose the popular vote in a landslide.
“There’s no other answer for you two being in this ring with the greatest team two superpowers could ever produce. Since you’re supposedly from this country, I’ll offer you a chance to save yourselves. I’m giving you five seconds to get out of my ring and tremble your way backstage.”
Mitchell and Dawson clearly have no plan to do so, instead moving toward the middle, causing Polly to shift behind her teammate. Lockwood peers around her fellow colluder at the challengers.
“Unfortunately, there are only a few TRUE Americans like myself who make this country what it is. And with the help of our great, powerful friends…”
Polly wraps an arm around the Russian redhead’s waist.
“We’ll clean out all the weaklings that rot our great land from the inside. You two brats included!”
Lockwood lets the stick tumble from her fingers, hitting the deck with a CLUNK. Collusion backpedals to their corner, Kira and Polly discussing who’ll lead their assault.
When Skye remains center stage, Charlie heading for her position on the outside, Lockwood decides she’s up to the task, directing Koslova to take her place as second fiddle.
Polly Patriot moves to the middle and Mitchell meets her there, not backing down in the least. They dip foreheads, pressing them against each other, literally nose to nose, Lockwood making clear that despite evidence to the contrary, America’s Sweethearts neither lived up to their name nor should they be in a title match.
“We’ve already beaten teams better then you and Russian Red to get here,” Skylar responds. “Tonight’s the final stop in joining my sisters as a FAWN champ.”
“You mean the one I beat to take the titles, not the hack who can barely stay in the organization?”
The bell rings and Polly piefaces the Lil’est Mitchell of the clan. Skye backpedals a step or two, doing her best to keep her head about her. Lockwood motions to the corner populated by Dawson. “Take yourself and that cupie doll of a partner to the back and I’ll pretend you’re not as stupid as low-energy, low-IQ Cynthia.
Showing her up is one thing but talking trash about her big sis is another altogether and Skylar unleashes with a right cross that staggers the True American. Not satisfied, rocks Lockwood with another and another, Polly’s arms windmilling as she tries and succeeds at keeping her balance. Skye unleashes a fourth that Fox&Friendly blonde ducks under. The little blonde hardbody DRIVES a knee into Mitchell’s solar plexus, the Sweetheart folded around the impact, baby blues bulging. Lockwood turns to her partner.
“How did we get so lucky? Getting the twerps?”
Snatching Skylar’s lowered noggin in a side headlock with her left arm, the Star-Spangled Bytch fires a fusillade of closed right firsts into Mitchell’s forehead before exchanging her grip for a wrist and flinging the babyfaced brunette away with an Irish whip that ends with Mitchell turning into a harsh collision with a neutral corner. Skye grimaces in pain from the bruise to her backbone but it’s not nearly as bad as the splash of Polly’s sinewy frame against hers, Lockwood crushing the Sweetheart at full speed, her chest RAMMING into Skylar’s features.
Seamlessly, Polly bounces away from the impact with another wrist in her possession and sends her racing across the canvas, again turning and CRASHING into the opposite buckles. The challenger’s legs give way and Mitchell plops to her butt, stems extended in front of her, head bobbling, arms limp at her sides.
With Charlie pleading with her partner to “MOVE”, a grinning Lockwood takes off, planning to fill Skye’s face with her Rockets Red Glare, a humiliating bronco buster that would give Mitchell a close-up of the Stripes in her Old Glory-inspired attire. But as Lockwood leaps toward a battering landing, Mitchell drops to her side and the True American goes sailing over. The ‘V’ of her legs end like a horseshoe hitting a stake, the champ RAMMING her crotch into the metal ring post.
A delighted crowd, clearly made up of liberal pinheads and potheads, laugh and cheer at Polly’s face twisting in agony, hands burying in her patriotic pussy.
Having pushed to her feet behind Lockwood, Mitchell snatches Polly’s head, wrapping up the blonde’s braincase in an inverted facelock. The second-generation superstar pulls the Trump true believer out from her painful position against the iron rod so Polly’s legs are extended from the middle ropes, each Achilles’ draped on the cable on either aside of the corner. From there, the Sweetheart quickly converts an inverted DDT, laying out, PLANTING the back of the champ’s skull into the thinly-sheathed plywood.
Dazed, Lockwood stares glassy-eyed into the rafters, the FAWNatics roaring as the Lil’est Mitchell covers in a lateral press for what might be the most unfathomable pair of tag champions, the organization had yet rendered. But there Skye is, body perpendicular and TIGHT to Polly’s, Mitchell hooking the far leg, like Mama always taught for the…
ONE…
TWO…
The True American’s body convulses and she shakes Mitchell off enough to get her shoulders off the canvas, rolling to her side then to all fours, before one hand slips between her thighs to work at the pulsating pain from below.
Beside her and standing, Skylar tugs the former Fox News babbler to her feet and into a tight side headlock. She grinds away on the grip Carolina old-school.
“You’re a sad symbol of our country,” Mitchell informs, “spoiled brat constantly relying on Putin’s pooch. Mueller didn’t find collusion, just that your boss was a moron. FAWN fans won’t find you either after Charlie and I are done.”
Speaking of, Mitchell draws Lockwood to the Collusion corner and hands the reins to Dawson with a tag, the platinum blonde hopping clean over the ropes to enter. Skye draws Polly’s head back and bangs it into the top buckle before exiting. As FAWN goes, it’s a pretty clean exchange of personnel and the ‘buh-bye’ from Mitchell doesn’t even draw a remark from Castle.
As the vertically-challenged Lockwood staggers serval steps away from the Sweethearts’ corner, wobbling to a stop, head bowed, the new arrival climbs to the middle ropes. Dawson leaps from her perch, soaring over Polly’s right shoulder, grabbing her foe’s noggin on the fly-by and RIPPING Polly off her feet with a blockbuster neckbreaker.
Blockbuster neckbreaker (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SH53y6_6UFk )
Lockwood’s abbreviated legs rise above her as she lands heavy on her head and shoulders and Dawson’s quick enough on the scramble to catch them before thy flop back to the canvas, rolling the “patriot” up in a cradle for the…
ONE…
TWO…
Polly kicks her way free of the pinning predicament, pushing Dawson up to her haunches. Charlotte doesn’t show a hint of annoyance of coming up one second short of the ultimate goal. Instead, as Lockwood rolls to her chest and begins pushing up, Charlie dives atop the True American from the side and captures the far arm behind her looping grip around the nearside of Polly’s neck. As an added bonus, she scissors the near arm, securing a hold of which any submission specialist would be proud.
Crossface Scissored Armbar (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pc1m1Ht9FLA )
I doesn’t take but a few seconds for Polly to yelp in complaint and for the fans to call for the Fox&Friendly blonde to surrender. Castle asks as well and gets an enthusiastic FU from the title holder. Gritting her teeth, Dawson reels back on her locked fingers, increasing the pressure on shoulder and neck, curbing that enthusiasm greatly, Polly changing her tune, calling for Kira to provide less than covert assistance. But Castle has ears and he turns to an entering Koslova, pointing the redhead the way back outside the squared circle.
With arms apprehended, Polly has few options of escape, but the veteran manages to use her squirming stems to rotate her body enough to drape an ankle over the bottom rope and squeal for her release. Nick acknowledges and informs Dawson who, in turn unhooks her scissors and crossface grip instantly. She pops cheerily to her feet, drawing an ovation from the sellout assemblage.
Backing off several steps at Polly’s demand and Castle’s urging, Charlie prompts a rhythmic clap from the crowd as a scowling Lockwood climbs the cables and rolls her aching neck and right shoulder. With an adorable grin, Charlie motions the champ forward.
“You starting to figure out us being here isn’t a fluke?” Dawson inquires.
“You’re going to figure out why we’re champs?” Polly responds.
“Oh. So you’re tagging your partner in?”
Polly growls in anger, forgetting her aches and pains and charging the challenger with a double axhandle loaded for placement on Dawson’s forehead, but Charlie intercedes with a well-aimed toe kick that delves into Polly’s navel, doubling over the Star Spangled Bytch. As Lockwood groans, the most famous alumni of the Desert Divas organization turns and heads for the ropes behind her. She rebounds out of the cables and charges her foe.
But Polly’s ready, pivoting and scooping Dawson off the canvas on her hip. She lifts the platinum blonde up to a body slam position on her right shoulder but the Sweetheart isn’t done slithering around the “patriot’s” body, curling her way off the launch point and into a scissoring guillotine choke of the recently announced future head of the Department of Education.
The future Madame Secretary is immediately showered with chants of “TAP…TAP…TAP” and she raises an index finger, waggling it ta the crowd and Castle. Still, Charlie is strapped on like a little bulldog and Polly’s stubby but powerful legs give a shimmy. While Skye cheers on her fellow Sweetheart, the obstinate flag-waver turns with her bundle toward the Collusion corner and strides unsteadily, picking up steam until she THUMPS Charlie’s spine into the buckles.
The impact loosens Dawson’s grip and a nasty right forearm to the back of her skull from the Putinista ends it completely. Guillotine removed from around her neck and scissors from around her midriff, Lockwood has the strength to shift her arms under Dawson’s alabaster thighs and keep her foe elevated as Kira climbs the buckles behind her. Polly staggers a few steps out from her HQ and holds on until Kira launches and takes the Desert Diva out of her grip with a flying clothesline that sends Charlie CRASHING to the deck.
Lockwood is more than ready for a rest and she stumbles her way out of the ring, Dawson avoiding the usual double-teaming display of the colluding champions, but Kira is more than ready to dole out some punishment. She fashions a pointed right elbow and drops it into Charlie’s sternum, sending a rippling shudder through the Desert Diva’s frame.
Judging it too early to go for the victory, Koslova pulls the blonde up to a seat, Dawson’s legs extended in front of her. Behind, the Red Menace snatches both of her foe’s arms at the wrists and thrusts her right knee between Charlie’s shoulderblades, testing the Sweetheart’s will with a modified surfboard hold. Trying to put a dent in Dawson’s spine while also threatening to remove arms from shoulder sockets, the solemn Russian silently grinds away on Charlie.
From the sidelines, Polly demands her fellow colluder “destroy the cupie doll” and sinewy redhead seems amenable even if she doesn’t respond to her partner directly. Leaning into the bony joint, Dawson fights through the pain and gets her knees then her feet beneath her, reaching vertical. Kira transitions to a full nelson with her piercing knee cap no longer in place. She rattles the Sweetheart’s noggin before shifting to a side headlock.
With the blonde in her control, Koslova sprints to a neutral corner with Charlie in tow. She leaps to the left of the corner, sliding between the top and middle ropes as she DRIVES Dawson’s skull into the middle turnbuckle with a battering bulldog.
Turnbuckle bulldog (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RhIIQ65-QFU )
The blasted Charlie flops to her back a few feet from impact, a tantalizing distance for an aerial assault from the nearby buckles. But the Russian, like most, enjoys her ground game. She roughly draws a flagging Dawson to her feet, Charlotte doubled and dazed. The crystal blue eyes of the Rooskie catch a glimmer. A slight smirk emerging as she underhooks one of Dawson’s droopy arms then the other. Setting herself, Kira heaves the diminutive and beloved blonde up-n-over with beautiful butterfly suplex.
Butterfly Suplex (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-Ajjp5D63YQ )
The landing knocks the air out of the upset-minded challenger and the momentum slides Charlie up to a seat, her left arm quickly reaching for the base of her spinal column, Dawson yelping in pain from the landing.
Coming in from the Sweetheart’s six, Kira snatches Dawson by her platinum blonde locks and RIPS Charlie to her feet, Nick Castle getting in the champ’s ear about the hair. The champ blithely ignores the official, turning Dawson to face her and checking the blonde’s chin with a European Uppercut that snaps the challenger’s head in a whiplash-inducing snap.
The staggered Desert Diva backpedals into the ropes behind her, throwing arms over the top cable to keep herself upright. Immediately, Kira is upon her, CRASHING a clothesline into Charlie’s clavicle. The impact sends Dawson flipping over the strands, but she manages to snatch the top rope on the opposite side and remain on the apron, recovering from a wobble that nearly delivers her to the floor below.
Instead, Charlie tries to slide back in and gets intercepted halfway with a wicked kneelift that takes the starch out of the challenger, Dawson sagging atop the middle rope. Kira backpedals until she feels rubber-coated steel behind her. Using the rebound, the Red Menace sprints toward her foe, snatches Charlotte’s head as she races by, and lays out, sending Dawson into a swinging neckbreaker from her precarious position, raising the level of impact of the Russian ingenious augmentation of the maneuver.
Middle Rope Hung Swinging Neckbreaker (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4F43BMNBd-4 )
With Charlie cradling the back of her neck and head with both hands, Kira can hear the shrill shouts of her partner, demanding entry. The demands of her partner curdle in Kira’s ears. Koslova doesn’t even turn in Lockwood’s direction, instead holding up a palm toward the True American. Instantly, Polly’s mouth shuts obediently. She watches as the Putinista stalks the rising Sweetheart.
Kira slips halfway through the ropes, dropping into a handstand. Her legs snake around the arms of the platinum blonde, stretching the limb backward. Koslova gathers up Charlie’s legs and elevates, capturing Dawson in a limb-tormenting Tarantula.
Tarantula (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oFQhOLHntY4 )
As Charlie writhes and howls in pain, Nick demands the Russian relent. He finally starts his count when he receives no response and Koslova holds on for the full ‘FOUR’ before disengaging and sliding fully back into the squared circle. Charlie having pooled at her feet, moaning like the overmatched pretender many in the crowd feared her to be. Her partner shows no such doubt but does call for Dawson to find a way to Sweetheart HQ.
Kira shuts that idea down before Charlie can make her feet and get two steps in Skylar’s direction, violently flattening the Desert Diva to the canvas with a discus clothesline. One almost expects Charlie’s head to be rolling away from her body from the force of the blow, but it remains attached, glassy eyes staring blankly into the rafters as Kira decides she can afford to let Lockwood have her way.
Unconcerned Dawson will be getting up anytime soon, she strides to Polly and hands over the steering wheel to the more flamboyant and clearly self-absorbed of the colluders. Instead of entering, the Star Spangled Bytch travels around the outside of the ropes, remaining on the apron until she reaches the vicinity of Charlie, Dawson struggling to her feet.
Reaching vertical, the clueless blonde tries to find her missing foe. Finally, turning behind her, she finds all too much of Polly. Lockwood, having latched onto the middle cable with both hands, fires like a missile through the cables with her Lockwood Lung, SPEARING the holy heaven out of the beloved Sweetheart, Charlie folded in half and PLANTED into the canvas.
Lockwood Lunge (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lhSX8bNbYGE )
Ending in a motionless starfish after the brutal tackle from the vertically challenged hardbody, the beleaguered Dawson is on a platter for another successful title defense from Collusion. A smirking Polly arrogantly covers the defeated Dawson, pressing palms into her gulping tummy and pounding chest for the…
ONE…
TWO…
THRNOOO!
Sweet Charlotte throws a shoulder up, stubborn to the end, determined to show hers is the REAL American Way.
A furious Polly hops to her feet and stomps in a tirade around the ring, ultimately blaming Castle, Mitchell, the fans, liberals, and the decaying moral fiber of Orlando Florida before returning toward Charlie, who’s made it to all fours. Stooping and reaching to collect the battered Sweetheart, Polly’s legs bow the slightest bit and Dawson scurries through the five-hole, scrambling on hands and knees across the ring.
A startled Polly turns and races after her, coming up just short of catching her by a toe before Dawson delivers a tag to the rested, ready and ravenous Mitchell.
Skye uses the top rope to hop over and straight into a dropkick to Polly’s chest, sending the little blonde hardbody over in a back somersault. A wincing Lockwood uses the momentum to end on her feet, staggering as Mitchell charges toward her. Still, the Star Spangled Bytch is ready to scoop the Lil’est Mitchell of the deck on her hip. Unfortunately for the bewildered Lockwood, she can’t control Skye’s momentum. The brunette sweeps around the ‘patriot’ in an acrobatic display, Skylar keeping one step ahead of Polly’s ability to counter until, after two orbits, Skye PLANTS Lockwood’s skull to the canvas with a Satellite DDT.
Satellite DDT (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eEGqkyelxZY )
With a chance at the nigh impossible staring her in the face, Mitchell dives atop the prone form of the blonde, hooking a leg for the…
ONE…
TWO…
THRNOOO!
Koslova would have been tardy if the save were necessary but Polly perseveres and throws a shoulder off the deck to keep Collusion alive.
Determined to keep the momentum toward victory rolling, a risen Mitchell dips and collects Polly off the deck. But as she’s pulling the rubbery Lockwood to her feet, the True American’s nails flash toward Skye’s face and scrape across her blazing baby blues.
Skylar shrieks in pain, turning and stumbling away from the champion as all but Polly’s Patriots jeer the flag waver loud and strong. As the Carolina Cutie rubs at her watering eyes, blindly reaching the ropes, trying to find Charlie’s voice in the din, Lockwood’s to her feet.
The xenophobic opportunist knows an opening when she sees one. She ignores her aches and pains to track down the brunette before Skye can find her partner. Turning the brunette to face her with a grasp of the challenger’s shoulder, Polly plants a toe kick deep into Mitchell’s abdomen, doubling the second-generation superstar at the waist. She follows with a punt to the pert chest of the underdog, snapping Skylar’s body back in a whiplash. Mitchell maintains her verticality and Lockwood adds another kick, a boot between the legs of the half-blind brunette, cruelly splitting her wickets.
Skylar rises to tiptoes as her jaw drops, squeaking in pain. The noise grows when Polly drops to her knees in front of the frozen Mitchell, pushes Skye’s hands aside and sinks in her Presidential Handshake, Polly grabbing pussy and squeezing until her knuckles go white.
Mitchell wraps her palms around Polly’s right wrist and desperately tries to remove the claw but is unable. Lockwood continues to viciously gnaw away, finally giving the Handshake one final twisting tug before releasing, rising and snatching Mitchell by her dark locks, leading her limping to the Collusion corner. There Lockwood tags Kira.
Before exiting, Polly scoops the weepy-eyed Mitchell off the mat like a babe in her arms and genuflects, DRIVING Skye’s spine across the plank of her upper leg, half of Mitchell on either side. Instead of entering, Koslova is on the climb. She reaches the top buckle and launches, landing her right leg across Skye’s throat and sending the Lil’est Mitchell flipping off Polly’s knee.
Grasping at her neck, redfaced and gasping, Skye’s quickly collected by the Russian and rolled into a tight, cradled ball for the…
ONE…
TWO…
THRNOOO!
Desperate and determined, Mitchell kicks her way out, flopping to her side beside a stoic Kira. The Red Menace gives Lockwood a side-eye when Polly complains about Kira not being able to hold on through THREE and it’s enough to silent the Star Spangled Bytch.
Dragging the bedraggled Mitchell to the cables, Kira drapes the Carolina Cutie’s neck over the bottom rope, face pointed to the rafters. The Putinista slips through the cables and STANDS ATOP SKYE’S FACE while she grasps the top rope.
Rope-assisted Double Foot Press (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FRp3iGprLAA )
The vile maneuver draws an immediate count from Castle, but Kira gets to have her good “clean” American fun for four seconds, bouncing up and down on Skylar’s features. Hopping off before the threatened DQ, Koslova reenters and grabs Skye by the ankles, pulling her to center stage. Kira aims a knee right between the glazed baby blues of her foe and drops it, only to find Mitchell gone when Skye rolls to the right.
A pained Koslova pops to her feet, hopping as she holds her bruised joint close. Skylar forces her way through the haze, reaching vertical beside the redhead, but Koslova NAILS Mitchell with an elbow to the chin that stops the comeback dead in its tracks.
Slipping her head beneath Skylar’s left arm, Kira swings her right arm around the alabaster frame of the Carolinian. The champ launches Mitchell off the deck, the move first appearing to be a side suplex before transforming to a facebuster, Koslova SLAMMING the challenger into the thinly-sheathed plywood.
Belly-to-back facebuster (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vCBQG8m5KuM )
A gobsmacked Mitchell is rolled to her back by the colluder, Koslova covering for the…
ONE…
TWO…
THRENOO!
A worried Charlie watches as her partner escapes with Castle’s palm inches off the canvas. She swipes her platinum locks off her forehead and turns to the crowd, rhythmically clapping. The FAWNatics take on the timed ovation and Skye pushes to all fours, trying to respond to the support. Already on her feet, Kira sinks a set of talons into Mitchell’s locks, shaking her head at the imbecilic Americans.
“NYET!” she uncharacteristically shouts, Polly pleased with the rare show of emotion.
Kira rips Skye to her feet , dips under a ragged clothesline attempt from Mitchell, and sweeps her right arm across the chest and neck of the brunette, ready to launch Skye into ‘From Russia With Love’.
From Russia With Love (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GCbZgV7iDYg )
But as the Red Menace tries to vault Skylar into a devastating finish of the Lil’est Mitchell, the second-gen superstar has enough to grapevine a leg around one of the Russian’s, keeping her grounded. Kira tries to heave the Carolina Cutie up for the Big Knee again, but can’t break through the counter. And befopre she can try a third time, Skye’s ready. She lifts a knee into Kira’s solar plexus, forcing deep into the hammer-and-sickle cut-out of Koslova’s gear.
With the Russian’s grip loosened, Skye laces her fingers behind Koslova’s neck and drops to the canvas in a tuck, knees pressed to Kira’s chest with a Carolina Codebreaker.
Carolina Codebreaker (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WKCakk-95xE )
Left splayed in a starfish from the impact, Kira’s knocked into next week out of nowhere and, while excitement buzzes through the crowd, there’s a profound look of worry on Polly.
As Skylar slowly pushes to her feet above a splayed Koslova, she realizes the champion’s state and dives atop her foe for the…
ONE…
TWO…
Whether Kira would’ve kicked out in time will never be known as Polly enters, snatches an ankle, and drags the brunette off the shellshocked Rooskie.
As Castle starts to intervene, a platinum blonde blur pushes past. Charlie grabs Polly by a shoulder and spins the Star Spangled Bytch toward her. Dawson BLASTS a toe kick into the tanned tummy of Lockwood, grabs her by a wrist and the side of her patriotic booty trunks and bum rushes her foe to the ropes, tossing the True American to the floor.
With Skye back on her feet, Mitchell calls to her partner and the Desert Diva responds. Together, the Sweethearts move to the Red Menace and peel her off the deck. In tandem, blonde and brunette slip their heads under Kira’s limp arms, grasp a handful of her red spandex wardrobe then lift and deposit to the canvas with a double German suplex that rattles the ring and Koslova’s backbone.
Not done, the Sweethearts roll to their feet with the Russian still in their possession and repeat the maneuver, Koslova’s back arching in agony, her face etched in pain. It hardly comes a s surprise when the challengers go for three and again take the reeling Russian up and over, THWUMPING her to the deck, Polly’s partner reaching for her spine, trying to relieve the anguish.
Finally, paying attention to Nick instead of their adoring crowd, Charlie separates and departs while Skylar goes for the pin. Castle delays until Dawson is completely departed then drops and counts…
ONE…
TWO…
THREENOOO!
The champion sneaks a shoulder off the canvas a few inches. She thrusts a palm heel to Mitchell’s chin that sends the kneeling brunette to all fours, turned away from the Red Menace.
Desperate for some immediate complicity with Polly, Kira crawls toward her corner. Thankfully for the Russian, Lockwood’s made her way to home base from the floor. But as Kira reaches her, the Star Spangled Bytch is turned toward the FAWNatics, jawing with the less supportive members of the masses. Sensing Skye on her tail, a diving Koslova tags Polly’s hip from behind, a second before she’s snagged and ripped to her feet by Mitchell. With a shoulder and a handful of spandex at Kira’s hip, Skye spins the colluder into a pirouette and HEAVES the redhead over the top, the crowd roaring as Koslova’s sent tumbling to the concrete.
Deep in furious debate with the ‘bleeding hearts’ in the front rows, Polly hasn’t noticed the tag or Skye’s return. Mitchell taps the blonde on a shoulder and Lockwood turns to find Kira but instead discovers the Lil’est Mitchell. With Lockwood’s palms tight around the top rope, Skye grabs the cable and tugs the strand toward her, launching Polly into a soaring flip over the ropes, Lockwood CRASHING to her spine.
Mitchell tears a seated, mewling Polly to her feet. Cynthia’s sis lines Lockwood up with the Sweethearts’ corner and Irish whips the little blonde hardbody. Polly sprints at full speed to the buckles and turns into a body blasting collision, her spinal column taking the blow. The champ remains upright, an arm slung over the top rope on either side, but that changes quickly when a Carolina hurricane blows and brings in Skye. The brunette charges, leaps and DESTROYS Polly with a an engulfing splash that cuts Lockwood’s strings, sending the True American to her backside, legs extended in front of her.
Surveying Polly’s state, a cheeky Skye turns her derriere to the Star Spangled Bytch and forces Lockwood to ‘Kiss My Grits’. The Sweetheart indulges in her version of a stinkface, Mitchell swabbing her butt across Polly’s features, Lockwood’s face buried, her body spasming as she’s forced to endure a healthy half-dozen seconds with her face full of Carolina ass cheeks.
From outside, Charlie tags her partner’s shoulder and climbs while Mitchell ends her fun and pulls a greasy-faced Polly back to her feet, tugging her a few feet out from the buckles. A sputtering Polly turns to attack and absolutely EATS Greetings From Charlotte.
Skye’s superlative superkick nearly removes Polly’s head from her shoulders, Lockwood’s noggin SNAPPING back from the impact under her chin. Somehow, she remains upright out of sheer force of will, but it suits Charlie, who from the top buckle, launches toward the stunned Polly.
Dawson soars toward Lockwood, flipping as she catches her hands around Polly’s cranium. As Charlie lands on her diminutive derriere a shock hear round the world explodes through the arena as Polly’s skull is SPIKED into the mat with the Charlie Cutter.
Charlie Cutter (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P53Lflg9OC0 )
The FAWNatics erupt as Dawson dives atop her demolished foe, Skye seeping through the ropes to intercept a ragged but reentering Kira with a spear that plants the Red Menace down and out.
Nick slides into place and there’s no doubt about this…
ONE…
TWO…
THREEEE!
Again, the assembled audience rocks the arena’s foundation. Charlie tosses Polly’s limp, cradled leg aside and leaps for joy. Skye pushes up from the spreadeagled Koslova and joins in the celebration. The Sweethearts lock in an embrace and hop in unison around the ring as the announcer makes the once unthinkable official.
“Your winners and NEW FAWN tag team champions, AMERICA’S SWEETHEARTS!”
A semiconscious Kira rolls her way out of the ring, plopping to the floor, but smelling salts will be necessary for the comatose member of Collusion. The Sweethearts take care not to trample Polly’s carcass as they bounce around the squared circle, leaping and clapping and saluting the fans, sharing this career-defining moment with their countless supporters.
Finally, blonde and brunette are presented their prizes. Each takes a corner to climb and lift their belts toward the rafters. Skye is misty-eyed, knowing she’s matched her big sisters. Dawson, considered a cute moneymaking jobber when coming from Desert Divas despite her success in Albuquerque, proves the doubters wrong and is loving every second.
The nervous energy in the youngsters is evident as they wait for their cue to take the Spring Break ring and put an end to Collusion’s reign at the tag team top.
Settling and turning to each other, blonde and brunette share a warm embrace and whisper a few words of encouragement. Though far from the betting choice, at least the challengers’ would only have to beat one team to make their dream a reality.
The FAWNatics explode with excitement as Taylor Swift’s ‘Style’ plays over the arena speakers.
(https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-CmadmM5cOk )
A moment later, a stunning, dimpled platinum blonde bursts through the curtains, the crowd raising the decibels to outrageous levels.
CHARLIE DAWSON
The grappler cups a hand to an ear, daring the throng to get louder still and, when the blushing blonde drops to one knee to show the capacity crowd her partner standing behind, they manage.
The frenetic Lil’est Mitchell waves her arms upward, beckoning the FAWNatics to keep the love coming. Charlie raises her hands high and the babyfaced brunette laces her fingers with her fellow Sweetheart.
SKYLAR MITCHELL
Skye pulls her partner up and they pivot into an adorable hug, their foreheads pressing together, words exchanged under the roar of the crowd, the beloved duo no doubt acknowledging how important the chance they have tonight is.
The ring announcer makes the gravity of the situation clear.
“The following contest is scheduled for one fall, with a thirty minute time limit, and is for the FAWN Tag Team Championships! Introducing first, the challengers, at a total combined weight of two-hundred and twenty-six pounds ... Charlie Dawson... Skylar Mitchell, you know them, you love them, you can’t live without them... AMMMEEERRRIIICCCAAA’S SWWWEEEETTTHHHEEEAAARRRTTTSSS!”
Having left jobberdom well behind, it was time for the Sweethearts to take the next and ultimate step. They break from their huddle and head for the ring, Charlie and Skylar making it a point to slap EVERY single hand offered their way.
Reaching the squared circle, the Darling of the Desert and the Lil’est Mitchell slide under the bottom rope, spring to their feet and unzip their hot pink hoodies, Charlie slips hers off to reveal a light blue fightin’ two piece that, in spite of its somewhat modest and innocent cut still manages to raise the blood pressure of quite a few spectators. For her part, Skye sports a royal purple lycra bikini top and short shorts, with white pads and boots, the old school fans no doubt noting the distinct similarity in Skylar’s togs with the gear worn by her older sister Cynthia at the beginning of her career.
Charlotte and Skye share a high-five center stage as their music fades. They move to their corner, taking a moment to adjust their togs before intermittently stretching and waving, readying for the opportunity to send Collusion to the back pages.
With the saccharine Sweet-tarts situated, the arena’s speakers spark to life with the pounding of “America, Fuck Yeah” from Team America World Police, and the crowd is brought back to life as with shock therapy.
(https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7R5A0pg4oN8 )
Blue America’s least favorite, little blonde antagonist strides to center stage. Beside her is the woman she’d introduced to the big time and used to become and stay a champion, Kira Koslova. The Fox&Friendly blonde and the Russian redhead scan the proletariat, each with a golden championship belt slung over a shoulder.
POLLY LOCKWOOD
KIRA KOSLOVA
The women raise their trophies high and the increasing number of ‘Polly Patriots’ rise in support, the Star Spangled Bytch collecting more of the president’s base with each successive victory. Still in the minority, the Patriots salute their leader, her partner and their anthem. The far from silent majority make themselves known in completely different fashion, jeering the obnoxious xenophobe and her Russian ruffian.
The flaxen-haired hardbody brings a crisp salute to her brow to signal her troops then lets the liberal snowflakes know what she thinks of them by fashioning the knife-edge into a salute of the middle finger variety.
The True American is in her own brand of battle fatigues, Polly proudly sporting her customary hot pants and bikini top. Lockwood alternates her country’s colors between a shiny, eye catching blue topside, white stars prominently placed in the appropriate spots; and shimmering red and white-striped spandex below, the space age polymer barely covering her biscuit butt. She finishes the ensemble with gleaming white pads and boots.
Lockwood sports her customary cape, Old Glory draped over her shoulders.
She turns and accepts her new partner in a literal Russian bear hug. As the crowd’s jeers rise in volume, the duo separate and start down the ramp to defend their titles.
Kira throws off a full length grey fur coat and white wool hat to reveal a simple red one piece, with one unusual aspect — a cutout pattern displaying a portion of Kira’s tanned, toned abdomen in the form of a hammer and sickle, Koslova embracing her dictatorial roots even more forcefully than her hero, President Vlad. White pads and boots, the footwear with red hammer-and-sickles, complete the rookie’s attire.
Shoulder to shoulder, the international team march confidently to the ring, Polly occasionally jawing with the fans who’ve watched too much fake news and saluting those with enough common sense to understand she’s the best this country and thus the world has ever produced. Koslova is a picture of former Soviet stoicism, ignoring the hate emanating from the FAWNatics, steering clear of them altogether as she tramps to the squared circle.
Reaching the ring, Lockwood is energized next to her powerful ally, as she informs the challengers that in this country, HER COUNTRY, there’s no room for sweethearts, only motherfuckin’ warriors. When a smartass call out from the first row to ask Polly if she has bone spurs, Lockwood threatens to have the man deported. The comparatively calm Koslova pulls Polly away from the altercation and the Russian leads her teammate up the steps as the announcer makes their introduction.
“And their opponents...hailing from Buffalo, New York and St. Petersburg, Russia, respectively, at a combined weight of two hundred and forty pounds…the FAWN tag team champions…Polly Lockwood and Kira Koslova, together they commit COLLUSION!”
Koslova sits on the middle cable and pushes the top upward to make room for her partner in crime and success. Polly dives through the opening, landing on her hands and rolling through a somersault, the momentum of which she uses to pop to her feet. Kira swings her legs through, climbs off the middle rope and strides to the Pernicious Patriot in less dramatic fashion.
Kira hands a microphone to Polly then relieves Lockwood of her banner/cape, neatly folding the Stars-n-Stripes and placing it in Collusion’s corner.
“There’s only one way to explain it,” Lockwood announces. “Pure stupid luck.”
The reaction from the crowd shows Polly would lose the popular vote in a landslide.
“There’s no other answer for you two being in this ring with the greatest team two superpowers could ever produce. Since you’re supposedly from this country, I’ll offer you a chance to save yourselves. I’m giving you five seconds to get out of my ring and tremble your way backstage.”
Mitchell and Dawson clearly have no plan to do so, instead moving toward the middle, causing Polly to shift behind her teammate. Lockwood peers around her fellow colluder at the challengers.
“Unfortunately, there are only a few TRUE Americans like myself who make this country what it is. And with the help of our great, powerful friends…”
Polly wraps an arm around the Russian redhead’s waist.
“We’ll clean out all the weaklings that rot our great land from the inside. You two brats included!”
Lockwood lets the stick tumble from her fingers, hitting the deck with a CLUNK. Collusion backpedals to their corner, Kira and Polly discussing who’ll lead their assault.
When Skye remains center stage, Charlie heading for her position on the outside, Lockwood decides she’s up to the task, directing Koslova to take her place as second fiddle.
Polly Patriot moves to the middle and Mitchell meets her there, not backing down in the least. They dip foreheads, pressing them against each other, literally nose to nose, Lockwood making clear that despite evidence to the contrary, America’s Sweethearts neither lived up to their name nor should they be in a title match.
“We’ve already beaten teams better then you and Russian Red to get here,” Skylar responds. “Tonight’s the final stop in joining my sisters as a FAWN champ.”
“You mean the one I beat to take the titles, not the hack who can barely stay in the organization?”
The bell rings and Polly piefaces the Lil’est Mitchell of the clan. Skye backpedals a step or two, doing her best to keep her head about her. Lockwood motions to the corner populated by Dawson. “Take yourself and that cupie doll of a partner to the back and I’ll pretend you’re not as stupid as low-energy, low-IQ Cynthia.
Showing her up is one thing but talking trash about her big sis is another altogether and Skylar unleashes with a right cross that staggers the True American. Not satisfied, rocks Lockwood with another and another, Polly’s arms windmilling as she tries and succeeds at keeping her balance. Skye unleashes a fourth that Fox&Friendly blonde ducks under. The little blonde hardbody DRIVES a knee into Mitchell’s solar plexus, the Sweetheart folded around the impact, baby blues bulging. Lockwood turns to her partner.
“How did we get so lucky? Getting the twerps?”
Snatching Skylar’s lowered noggin in a side headlock with her left arm, the Star-Spangled Bytch fires a fusillade of closed right firsts into Mitchell’s forehead before exchanging her grip for a wrist and flinging the babyfaced brunette away with an Irish whip that ends with Mitchell turning into a harsh collision with a neutral corner. Skye grimaces in pain from the bruise to her backbone but it’s not nearly as bad as the splash of Polly’s sinewy frame against hers, Lockwood crushing the Sweetheart at full speed, her chest RAMMING into Skylar’s features.
Seamlessly, Polly bounces away from the impact with another wrist in her possession and sends her racing across the canvas, again turning and CRASHING into the opposite buckles. The challenger’s legs give way and Mitchell plops to her butt, stems extended in front of her, head bobbling, arms limp at her sides.
With Charlie pleading with her partner to “MOVE”, a grinning Lockwood takes off, planning to fill Skye’s face with her Rockets Red Glare, a humiliating bronco buster that would give Mitchell a close-up of the Stripes in her Old Glory-inspired attire. But as Lockwood leaps toward a battering landing, Mitchell drops to her side and the True American goes sailing over. The ‘V’ of her legs end like a horseshoe hitting a stake, the champ RAMMING her crotch into the metal ring post.
A delighted crowd, clearly made up of liberal pinheads and potheads, laugh and cheer at Polly’s face twisting in agony, hands burying in her patriotic pussy.
Having pushed to her feet behind Lockwood, Mitchell snatches Polly’s head, wrapping up the blonde’s braincase in an inverted facelock. The second-generation superstar pulls the Trump true believer out from her painful position against the iron rod so Polly’s legs are extended from the middle ropes, each Achilles’ draped on the cable on either aside of the corner. From there, the Sweetheart quickly converts an inverted DDT, laying out, PLANTING the back of the champ’s skull into the thinly-sheathed plywood.
Dazed, Lockwood stares glassy-eyed into the rafters, the FAWNatics roaring as the Lil’est Mitchell covers in a lateral press for what might be the most unfathomable pair of tag champions, the organization had yet rendered. But there Skye is, body perpendicular and TIGHT to Polly’s, Mitchell hooking the far leg, like Mama always taught for the…
ONE…
TWO…
The True American’s body convulses and she shakes Mitchell off enough to get her shoulders off the canvas, rolling to her side then to all fours, before one hand slips between her thighs to work at the pulsating pain from below.
Beside her and standing, Skylar tugs the former Fox News babbler to her feet and into a tight side headlock. She grinds away on the grip Carolina old-school.
“You’re a sad symbol of our country,” Mitchell informs, “spoiled brat constantly relying on Putin’s pooch. Mueller didn’t find collusion, just that your boss was a moron. FAWN fans won’t find you either after Charlie and I are done.”
Speaking of, Mitchell draws Lockwood to the Collusion corner and hands the reins to Dawson with a tag, the platinum blonde hopping clean over the ropes to enter. Skye draws Polly’s head back and bangs it into the top buckle before exiting. As FAWN goes, it’s a pretty clean exchange of personnel and the ‘buh-bye’ from Mitchell doesn’t even draw a remark from Castle.
As the vertically-challenged Lockwood staggers serval steps away from the Sweethearts’ corner, wobbling to a stop, head bowed, the new arrival climbs to the middle ropes. Dawson leaps from her perch, soaring over Polly’s right shoulder, grabbing her foe’s noggin on the fly-by and RIPPING Polly off her feet with a blockbuster neckbreaker.
Blockbuster neckbreaker (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SH53y6_6UFk )
Lockwood’s abbreviated legs rise above her as she lands heavy on her head and shoulders and Dawson’s quick enough on the scramble to catch them before thy flop back to the canvas, rolling the “patriot” up in a cradle for the…
ONE…
TWO…
Polly kicks her way free of the pinning predicament, pushing Dawson up to her haunches. Charlotte doesn’t show a hint of annoyance of coming up one second short of the ultimate goal. Instead, as Lockwood rolls to her chest and begins pushing up, Charlie dives atop the True American from the side and captures the far arm behind her looping grip around the nearside of Polly’s neck. As an added bonus, she scissors the near arm, securing a hold of which any submission specialist would be proud.
Crossface Scissored Armbar (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pc1m1Ht9FLA )
I doesn’t take but a few seconds for Polly to yelp in complaint and for the fans to call for the Fox&Friendly blonde to surrender. Castle asks as well and gets an enthusiastic FU from the title holder. Gritting her teeth, Dawson reels back on her locked fingers, increasing the pressure on shoulder and neck, curbing that enthusiasm greatly, Polly changing her tune, calling for Kira to provide less than covert assistance. But Castle has ears and he turns to an entering Koslova, pointing the redhead the way back outside the squared circle.
With arms apprehended, Polly has few options of escape, but the veteran manages to use her squirming stems to rotate her body enough to drape an ankle over the bottom rope and squeal for her release. Nick acknowledges and informs Dawson who, in turn unhooks her scissors and crossface grip instantly. She pops cheerily to her feet, drawing an ovation from the sellout assemblage.
Backing off several steps at Polly’s demand and Castle’s urging, Charlie prompts a rhythmic clap from the crowd as a scowling Lockwood climbs the cables and rolls her aching neck and right shoulder. With an adorable grin, Charlie motions the champ forward.
“You starting to figure out us being here isn’t a fluke?” Dawson inquires.
“You’re going to figure out why we’re champs?” Polly responds.
“Oh. So you’re tagging your partner in?”
Polly growls in anger, forgetting her aches and pains and charging the challenger with a double axhandle loaded for placement on Dawson’s forehead, but Charlie intercedes with a well-aimed toe kick that delves into Polly’s navel, doubling over the Star Spangled Bytch. As Lockwood groans, the most famous alumni of the Desert Divas organization turns and heads for the ropes behind her. She rebounds out of the cables and charges her foe.
But Polly’s ready, pivoting and scooping Dawson off the canvas on her hip. She lifts the platinum blonde up to a body slam position on her right shoulder but the Sweetheart isn’t done slithering around the “patriot’s” body, curling her way off the launch point and into a scissoring guillotine choke of the recently announced future head of the Department of Education.
The future Madame Secretary is immediately showered with chants of “TAP…TAP…TAP” and she raises an index finger, waggling it ta the crowd and Castle. Still, Charlie is strapped on like a little bulldog and Polly’s stubby but powerful legs give a shimmy. While Skye cheers on her fellow Sweetheart, the obstinate flag-waver turns with her bundle toward the Collusion corner and strides unsteadily, picking up steam until she THUMPS Charlie’s spine into the buckles.
The impact loosens Dawson’s grip and a nasty right forearm to the back of her skull from the Putinista ends it completely. Guillotine removed from around her neck and scissors from around her midriff, Lockwood has the strength to shift her arms under Dawson’s alabaster thighs and keep her foe elevated as Kira climbs the buckles behind her. Polly staggers a few steps out from her HQ and holds on until Kira launches and takes the Desert Diva out of her grip with a flying clothesline that sends Charlie CRASHING to the deck.
Lockwood is more than ready for a rest and she stumbles her way out of the ring, Dawson avoiding the usual double-teaming display of the colluding champions, but Kira is more than ready to dole out some punishment. She fashions a pointed right elbow and drops it into Charlie’s sternum, sending a rippling shudder through the Desert Diva’s frame.
Judging it too early to go for the victory, Koslova pulls the blonde up to a seat, Dawson’s legs extended in front of her. Behind, the Red Menace snatches both of her foe’s arms at the wrists and thrusts her right knee between Charlie’s shoulderblades, testing the Sweetheart’s will with a modified surfboard hold. Trying to put a dent in Dawson’s spine while also threatening to remove arms from shoulder sockets, the solemn Russian silently grinds away on Charlie.
From the sidelines, Polly demands her fellow colluder “destroy the cupie doll” and sinewy redhead seems amenable even if she doesn’t respond to her partner directly. Leaning into the bony joint, Dawson fights through the pain and gets her knees then her feet beneath her, reaching vertical. Kira transitions to a full nelson with her piercing knee cap no longer in place. She rattles the Sweetheart’s noggin before shifting to a side headlock.
With the blonde in her control, Koslova sprints to a neutral corner with Charlie in tow. She leaps to the left of the corner, sliding between the top and middle ropes as she DRIVES Dawson’s skull into the middle turnbuckle with a battering bulldog.
Turnbuckle bulldog (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RhIIQ65-QFU )
The blasted Charlie flops to her back a few feet from impact, a tantalizing distance for an aerial assault from the nearby buckles. But the Russian, like most, enjoys her ground game. She roughly draws a flagging Dawson to her feet, Charlotte doubled and dazed. The crystal blue eyes of the Rooskie catch a glimmer. A slight smirk emerging as she underhooks one of Dawson’s droopy arms then the other. Setting herself, Kira heaves the diminutive and beloved blonde up-n-over with beautiful butterfly suplex.
Butterfly Suplex (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-Ajjp5D63YQ )
The landing knocks the air out of the upset-minded challenger and the momentum slides Charlie up to a seat, her left arm quickly reaching for the base of her spinal column, Dawson yelping in pain from the landing.
Coming in from the Sweetheart’s six, Kira snatches Dawson by her platinum blonde locks and RIPS Charlie to her feet, Nick Castle getting in the champ’s ear about the hair. The champ blithely ignores the official, turning Dawson to face her and checking the blonde’s chin with a European Uppercut that snaps the challenger’s head in a whiplash-inducing snap.
The staggered Desert Diva backpedals into the ropes behind her, throwing arms over the top cable to keep herself upright. Immediately, Kira is upon her, CRASHING a clothesline into Charlie’s clavicle. The impact sends Dawson flipping over the strands, but she manages to snatch the top rope on the opposite side and remain on the apron, recovering from a wobble that nearly delivers her to the floor below.
Instead, Charlie tries to slide back in and gets intercepted halfway with a wicked kneelift that takes the starch out of the challenger, Dawson sagging atop the middle rope. Kira backpedals until she feels rubber-coated steel behind her. Using the rebound, the Red Menace sprints toward her foe, snatches Charlotte’s head as she races by, and lays out, sending Dawson into a swinging neckbreaker from her precarious position, raising the level of impact of the Russian ingenious augmentation of the maneuver.
Middle Rope Hung Swinging Neckbreaker (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4F43BMNBd-4 )
With Charlie cradling the back of her neck and head with both hands, Kira can hear the shrill shouts of her partner, demanding entry. The demands of her partner curdle in Kira’s ears. Koslova doesn’t even turn in Lockwood’s direction, instead holding up a palm toward the True American. Instantly, Polly’s mouth shuts obediently. She watches as the Putinista stalks the rising Sweetheart.
Kira slips halfway through the ropes, dropping into a handstand. Her legs snake around the arms of the platinum blonde, stretching the limb backward. Koslova gathers up Charlie’s legs and elevates, capturing Dawson in a limb-tormenting Tarantula.
Tarantula (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oFQhOLHntY4 )
As Charlie writhes and howls in pain, Nick demands the Russian relent. He finally starts his count when he receives no response and Koslova holds on for the full ‘FOUR’ before disengaging and sliding fully back into the squared circle. Charlie having pooled at her feet, moaning like the overmatched pretender many in the crowd feared her to be. Her partner shows no such doubt but does call for Dawson to find a way to Sweetheart HQ.
Kira shuts that idea down before Charlie can make her feet and get two steps in Skylar’s direction, violently flattening the Desert Diva to the canvas with a discus clothesline. One almost expects Charlie’s head to be rolling away from her body from the force of the blow, but it remains attached, glassy eyes staring blankly into the rafters as Kira decides she can afford to let Lockwood have her way.
Unconcerned Dawson will be getting up anytime soon, she strides to Polly and hands over the steering wheel to the more flamboyant and clearly self-absorbed of the colluders. Instead of entering, the Star Spangled Bytch travels around the outside of the ropes, remaining on the apron until she reaches the vicinity of Charlie, Dawson struggling to her feet.
Reaching vertical, the clueless blonde tries to find her missing foe. Finally, turning behind her, she finds all too much of Polly. Lockwood, having latched onto the middle cable with both hands, fires like a missile through the cables with her Lockwood Lung, SPEARING the holy heaven out of the beloved Sweetheart, Charlie folded in half and PLANTED into the canvas.
Lockwood Lunge (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lhSX8bNbYGE )
Ending in a motionless starfish after the brutal tackle from the vertically challenged hardbody, the beleaguered Dawson is on a platter for another successful title defense from Collusion. A smirking Polly arrogantly covers the defeated Dawson, pressing palms into her gulping tummy and pounding chest for the…
ONE…
TWO…
THRNOOO!
Sweet Charlotte throws a shoulder up, stubborn to the end, determined to show hers is the REAL American Way.
A furious Polly hops to her feet and stomps in a tirade around the ring, ultimately blaming Castle, Mitchell, the fans, liberals, and the decaying moral fiber of Orlando Florida before returning toward Charlie, who’s made it to all fours. Stooping and reaching to collect the battered Sweetheart, Polly’s legs bow the slightest bit and Dawson scurries through the five-hole, scrambling on hands and knees across the ring.
A startled Polly turns and races after her, coming up just short of catching her by a toe before Dawson delivers a tag to the rested, ready and ravenous Mitchell.
Skye uses the top rope to hop over and straight into a dropkick to Polly’s chest, sending the little blonde hardbody over in a back somersault. A wincing Lockwood uses the momentum to end on her feet, staggering as Mitchell charges toward her. Still, the Star Spangled Bytch is ready to scoop the Lil’est Mitchell of the deck on her hip. Unfortunately for the bewildered Lockwood, she can’t control Skye’s momentum. The brunette sweeps around the ‘patriot’ in an acrobatic display, Skylar keeping one step ahead of Polly’s ability to counter until, after two orbits, Skye PLANTS Lockwood’s skull to the canvas with a Satellite DDT.
Satellite DDT (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eEGqkyelxZY )
With a chance at the nigh impossible staring her in the face, Mitchell dives atop the prone form of the blonde, hooking a leg for the…
ONE…
TWO…
THRNOOO!
Koslova would have been tardy if the save were necessary but Polly perseveres and throws a shoulder off the deck to keep Collusion alive.
Determined to keep the momentum toward victory rolling, a risen Mitchell dips and collects Polly off the deck. But as she’s pulling the rubbery Lockwood to her feet, the True American’s nails flash toward Skye’s face and scrape across her blazing baby blues.
Skylar shrieks in pain, turning and stumbling away from the champion as all but Polly’s Patriots jeer the flag waver loud and strong. As the Carolina Cutie rubs at her watering eyes, blindly reaching the ropes, trying to find Charlie’s voice in the din, Lockwood’s to her feet.
The xenophobic opportunist knows an opening when she sees one. She ignores her aches and pains to track down the brunette before Skye can find her partner. Turning the brunette to face her with a grasp of the challenger’s shoulder, Polly plants a toe kick deep into Mitchell’s abdomen, doubling the second-generation superstar at the waist. She follows with a punt to the pert chest of the underdog, snapping Skylar’s body back in a whiplash. Mitchell maintains her verticality and Lockwood adds another kick, a boot between the legs of the half-blind brunette, cruelly splitting her wickets.
Skylar rises to tiptoes as her jaw drops, squeaking in pain. The noise grows when Polly drops to her knees in front of the frozen Mitchell, pushes Skye’s hands aside and sinks in her Presidential Handshake, Polly grabbing pussy and squeezing until her knuckles go white.
Mitchell wraps her palms around Polly’s right wrist and desperately tries to remove the claw but is unable. Lockwood continues to viciously gnaw away, finally giving the Handshake one final twisting tug before releasing, rising and snatching Mitchell by her dark locks, leading her limping to the Collusion corner. There Lockwood tags Kira.
Before exiting, Polly scoops the weepy-eyed Mitchell off the mat like a babe in her arms and genuflects, DRIVING Skye’s spine across the plank of her upper leg, half of Mitchell on either side. Instead of entering, Koslova is on the climb. She reaches the top buckle and launches, landing her right leg across Skye’s throat and sending the Lil’est Mitchell flipping off Polly’s knee.
Grasping at her neck, redfaced and gasping, Skye’s quickly collected by the Russian and rolled into a tight, cradled ball for the…
ONE…
TWO…
THRNOOO!
Desperate and determined, Mitchell kicks her way out, flopping to her side beside a stoic Kira. The Red Menace gives Lockwood a side-eye when Polly complains about Kira not being able to hold on through THREE and it’s enough to silent the Star Spangled Bytch.
Dragging the bedraggled Mitchell to the cables, Kira drapes the Carolina Cutie’s neck over the bottom rope, face pointed to the rafters. The Putinista slips through the cables and STANDS ATOP SKYE’S FACE while she grasps the top rope.
Rope-assisted Double Foot Press (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FRp3iGprLAA )
The vile maneuver draws an immediate count from Castle, but Kira gets to have her good “clean” American fun for four seconds, bouncing up and down on Skylar’s features. Hopping off before the threatened DQ, Koslova reenters and grabs Skye by the ankles, pulling her to center stage. Kira aims a knee right between the glazed baby blues of her foe and drops it, only to find Mitchell gone when Skye rolls to the right.
A pained Koslova pops to her feet, hopping as she holds her bruised joint close. Skylar forces her way through the haze, reaching vertical beside the redhead, but Koslova NAILS Mitchell with an elbow to the chin that stops the comeback dead in its tracks.
Slipping her head beneath Skylar’s left arm, Kira swings her right arm around the alabaster frame of the Carolinian. The champ launches Mitchell off the deck, the move first appearing to be a side suplex before transforming to a facebuster, Koslova SLAMMING the challenger into the thinly-sheathed plywood.
Belly-to-back facebuster (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vCBQG8m5KuM )
A gobsmacked Mitchell is rolled to her back by the colluder, Koslova covering for the…
ONE…
TWO…
THRENOO!
A worried Charlie watches as her partner escapes with Castle’s palm inches off the canvas. She swipes her platinum locks off her forehead and turns to the crowd, rhythmically clapping. The FAWNatics take on the timed ovation and Skye pushes to all fours, trying to respond to the support. Already on her feet, Kira sinks a set of talons into Mitchell’s locks, shaking her head at the imbecilic Americans.
“NYET!” she uncharacteristically shouts, Polly pleased with the rare show of emotion.
Kira rips Skye to her feet , dips under a ragged clothesline attempt from Mitchell, and sweeps her right arm across the chest and neck of the brunette, ready to launch Skye into ‘From Russia With Love’.
From Russia With Love (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GCbZgV7iDYg )
But as the Red Menace tries to vault Skylar into a devastating finish of the Lil’est Mitchell, the second-gen superstar has enough to grapevine a leg around one of the Russian’s, keeping her grounded. Kira tries to heave the Carolina Cutie up for the Big Knee again, but can’t break through the counter. And befopre she can try a third time, Skye’s ready. She lifts a knee into Kira’s solar plexus, forcing deep into the hammer-and-sickle cut-out of Koslova’s gear.
With the Russian’s grip loosened, Skye laces her fingers behind Koslova’s neck and drops to the canvas in a tuck, knees pressed to Kira’s chest with a Carolina Codebreaker.
Carolina Codebreaker (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WKCakk-95xE )
Left splayed in a starfish from the impact, Kira’s knocked into next week out of nowhere and, while excitement buzzes through the crowd, there’s a profound look of worry on Polly.
As Skylar slowly pushes to her feet above a splayed Koslova, she realizes the champion’s state and dives atop her foe for the…
ONE…
TWO…
Whether Kira would’ve kicked out in time will never be known as Polly enters, snatches an ankle, and drags the brunette off the shellshocked Rooskie.
As Castle starts to intervene, a platinum blonde blur pushes past. Charlie grabs Polly by a shoulder and spins the Star Spangled Bytch toward her. Dawson BLASTS a toe kick into the tanned tummy of Lockwood, grabs her by a wrist and the side of her patriotic booty trunks and bum rushes her foe to the ropes, tossing the True American to the floor.
With Skye back on her feet, Mitchell calls to her partner and the Desert Diva responds. Together, the Sweethearts move to the Red Menace and peel her off the deck. In tandem, blonde and brunette slip their heads under Kira’s limp arms, grasp a handful of her red spandex wardrobe then lift and deposit to the canvas with a double German suplex that rattles the ring and Koslova’s backbone.
Not done, the Sweethearts roll to their feet with the Russian still in their possession and repeat the maneuver, Koslova’s back arching in agony, her face etched in pain. It hardly comes a s surprise when the challengers go for three and again take the reeling Russian up and over, THWUMPING her to the deck, Polly’s partner reaching for her spine, trying to relieve the anguish.
Finally, paying attention to Nick instead of their adoring crowd, Charlie separates and departs while Skylar goes for the pin. Castle delays until Dawson is completely departed then drops and counts…
ONE…
TWO…
THREENOOO!
The champion sneaks a shoulder off the canvas a few inches. She thrusts a palm heel to Mitchell’s chin that sends the kneeling brunette to all fours, turned away from the Red Menace.
Desperate for some immediate complicity with Polly, Kira crawls toward her corner. Thankfully for the Russian, Lockwood’s made her way to home base from the floor. But as Kira reaches her, the Star Spangled Bytch is turned toward the FAWNatics, jawing with the less supportive members of the masses. Sensing Skye on her tail, a diving Koslova tags Polly’s hip from behind, a second before she’s snagged and ripped to her feet by Mitchell. With a shoulder and a handful of spandex at Kira’s hip, Skye spins the colluder into a pirouette and HEAVES the redhead over the top, the crowd roaring as Koslova’s sent tumbling to the concrete.
Deep in furious debate with the ‘bleeding hearts’ in the front rows, Polly hasn’t noticed the tag or Skye’s return. Mitchell taps the blonde on a shoulder and Lockwood turns to find Kira but instead discovers the Lil’est Mitchell. With Lockwood’s palms tight around the top rope, Skye grabs the cable and tugs the strand toward her, launching Polly into a soaring flip over the ropes, Lockwood CRASHING to her spine.
Mitchell tears a seated, mewling Polly to her feet. Cynthia’s sis lines Lockwood up with the Sweethearts’ corner and Irish whips the little blonde hardbody. Polly sprints at full speed to the buckles and turns into a body blasting collision, her spinal column taking the blow. The champ remains upright, an arm slung over the top rope on either side, but that changes quickly when a Carolina hurricane blows and brings in Skye. The brunette charges, leaps and DESTROYS Polly with a an engulfing splash that cuts Lockwood’s strings, sending the True American to her backside, legs extended in front of her.
Surveying Polly’s state, a cheeky Skye turns her derriere to the Star Spangled Bytch and forces Lockwood to ‘Kiss My Grits’. The Sweetheart indulges in her version of a stinkface, Mitchell swabbing her butt across Polly’s features, Lockwood’s face buried, her body spasming as she’s forced to endure a healthy half-dozen seconds with her face full of Carolina ass cheeks.
From outside, Charlie tags her partner’s shoulder and climbs while Mitchell ends her fun and pulls a greasy-faced Polly back to her feet, tugging her a few feet out from the buckles. A sputtering Polly turns to attack and absolutely EATS Greetings From Charlotte.
Skye’s superlative superkick nearly removes Polly’s head from her shoulders, Lockwood’s noggin SNAPPING back from the impact under her chin. Somehow, she remains upright out of sheer force of will, but it suits Charlie, who from the top buckle, launches toward the stunned Polly.
Dawson soars toward Lockwood, flipping as she catches her hands around Polly’s cranium. As Charlie lands on her diminutive derriere a shock hear round the world explodes through the arena as Polly’s skull is SPIKED into the mat with the Charlie Cutter.
Charlie Cutter (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P53Lflg9OC0 )
The FAWNatics erupt as Dawson dives atop her demolished foe, Skye seeping through the ropes to intercept a ragged but reentering Kira with a spear that plants the Red Menace down and out.
Nick slides into place and there’s no doubt about this…
ONE…
TWO…
THREEEE!
Again, the assembled audience rocks the arena’s foundation. Charlie tosses Polly’s limp, cradled leg aside and leaps for joy. Skye pushes up from the spreadeagled Koslova and joins in the celebration. The Sweethearts lock in an embrace and hop in unison around the ring as the announcer makes the once unthinkable official.
“Your winners and NEW FAWN tag team champions, AMERICA’S SWEETHEARTS!”
A semiconscious Kira rolls her way out of the ring, plopping to the floor, but smelling salts will be necessary for the comatose member of Collusion. The Sweethearts take care not to trample Polly’s carcass as they bounce around the squared circle, leaping and clapping and saluting the fans, sharing this career-defining moment with their countless supporters.
Finally, blonde and brunette are presented their prizes. Each takes a corner to climb and lift their belts toward the rafters. Skye is misty-eyed, knowing she’s matched her big sisters. Dawson, considered a cute moneymaking jobber when coming from Desert Divas despite her success in Albuquerque, proves the doubters wrong and is loving every second.