Post by hawkeye on Dec 7, 2017 1:14:03 GMT
“Ladies and gentlemen, our next match is a tag team contest scheduled for one fall. Introducing first, representing the sisters of Phi Theta Tappa and weighing in at a combined weight of less --”
The ring announcer stumbled over the words written on his cue card. He audibly groaned into his still-live microphone, and when he spoke again, his usual enthusiasm was replaced by the weary torpor of a man being forced to say something against his will.
“...of less than your mother, they are Allison Addison and Piper Sexton.”
Icona Pop’s “I Love It” pumped through the speakers, and a moment later a pair of young women just barely out of their teenage years stepped through the curtains, one redhead and one blonde. The Orlando crowd recognized them and remembered their past deeds, and the jeers rained from every nook and cranny of the packed FAWN Arena.
ALLISON ADDISON
PIPER SEXTON
Perhaps surprisingly, the pair of sorority sisters had opted for special wardrobes for All Hallow’s Evil. Piper had her blonde hair in a pair of loose side pigtails, and she was wearing a long-sleeved red, white and blue t-shirt bearing the slogan Daddy’s Lil Monster across the bust, along with denim booty shorts, fishnet stockings, and knee high black and white-laced boots. Meanwhile, fellow Phi Theta Tappa sister Allison wore her red hair loose and dressed in a forest green leotard inscribed with a leafy pattern along with matching green boots.
Marching down the center of the aisle so that they remained well out of reach of the fans at all times, the pair of wrestlers slid into the ring and claimed a corner for themselves. Merle came over to inspect for weapons and whatnot, though the referee got the feeling that their wardrobe was somehow vaguely familiar to him.
“Excuse me, but are the two of you dressed as movie characters or something?” he asked, prompting stereo snorts of disdain.
“I’m the vegan chick from that Clooney movie that wasn’t Ocean’s Eleven,” Allison explained while she rolled her eyes. “You know, the one with classic lines like ‘Ice to see you’ and ‘Let’s put a smile on that face’ and ‘MAARRRRTHAAAA!’”
A look of pure confusion came over Merle’s face and he started to protest only to be cut off by Piper.
“And I’m the baseball player from Academy-Award winner Suicide Team,” she said as she mimicked swinging a bat. “She’s the only one on the team who accepts Will Smith because everyone else is a racist who hates black people and family-friendly rap music you can dance to. Spoiler alert: she kills herself and rubs it in their stupid faces by leaving behind a suicide note that makes them all feel like shitheads.”
“Okay, that definitely doesn’t sound --”
Whatever Merle had in mind would be left unsaid as the speakers crackled to life with the ring announcer’s voice once more.
“And their opponents, weighing in tonight at a combined weight of 246lbs…hailing from Bright, Victoria, Australia, and from Santa Fe, New Mexico please welcome…Lyra Faulk and Harriet Larkin, the team known as…”
Before the announcer could give their team name he was overridden by a chiming, distorted, electric guitar.
A friend in need’s a friend indeed
PURE MORNING www.youtube.com/watch?v=DHQngnnHE_0
Sudden darkness in the FAWN arena, lights strobing through that blackness at random every few seconds. After a short while the strobes became more regular, beams of light from all angles throwing two figures into relief.
The foremost woman was already striding off towards the ring and the pair of costumed sorority girls waiting there. In contrast to her previous appearances she was dressed, perhaps surprisingly, in a tight green lycra one-piece, the top cut like a bodice while the bottom was cut to expose a good deal of her ivory-skinned flank. Her shockingly red hair fell in waves down to her shoulders, leaf designs stencilled on her arms and the whole look finished off with green boots.
HARRIET LARKIN
Her partner was taking a much slower path to the ring, eyes closed and dancing in time to the music. Or at least to some music; her intricate dance steps didn’t seem to be timed with what anyone else could hear. Her costume also consisted of a leotard, this one harlequinned in red and black and cut with long sleeves. She also wore full-length translucent tights underneath, leaving those long legs looking almost naturally coloured black and red. Her look was completed with black boots and a jester cap.
LYRA FAULK
Larkin waited at the bottom of the ramp for her partner, holding one hand out expectantly. Sure enough Lyra’s dancing took her almost perfectly to her partner’s side, the lights coming back on and Faulk’s eyes opening.
Then blinking several times in apparent confusion, she shouted, “Harry look, that must be the Earth-1 version of us!”
Sure enough, the crowd were realising that, somehow, both teams had managed to dress as Poison Ivy and Harley Quinn. Admittedly there were differences; the sorority girls shooting for the TV versions while Lyra had insisted that she and Harriet would be sticking to the original comic-book material. But still the situation could have been embarrassing. Faulk didn’t seem to think so though, dropping her partner’s hand and dashing up into the ring and over towards the slightly surprised sorority girls.
“G’day Harleen! G’day Pamela!” she shouted, holding out a hand to shake.
Neither Allison or Piper seemed to have any idea what she was talking about, so they just jointly flipped the bird at her until Larkin came over to drag her slightly upset looking partner away, muttering consolingly about how comic book villains are dicks in real life. The pair made it halfway back to their corner before coming across Merle, the junior referee looking quite pensive.
Lyra stopped, stepped up to him, took a piece of paper from her sleeve, and started reading from it.
“I’ve been told to tell you that I’m very sorry that I hurt your friend Algernon back at Fallout,” she said, voice remorseful and eyes fixed firmly on the paper. “Ms. Christian says I’ve to promise that I won’t hit you with any audio equipment for at least this whole match.”
If anything Merle looked even more anxious at this proclamation, taking a few steps away. But he remembered his manners, saying, “Uh…thank you miss, that’s…good to hear?”
Lyra glanced up at him, grinned shyly, then dashed off to her corner ready to begin the match.
Giving a quick peck on the cheek and a very cheerful-looking thumbs up to her partner, Lyra threaded herself through the ropes and took up a position on the apron, leaving Larkin to start things off for their team. Across the ring the sorority girls were engaging in a very animated game of rock, paper, scissors, accompanied by a whispered argument and a few quick re-tries.
Eventually Piper threw scissors to her partner’s paper. Allison pouted and looked like she might be about to argue until Sexton laid a reassuring hand on her shoulder and said, “Don’t worry babe, I’ll make sure there’s something left for you to play with.”
A smile crossed her face as she turned to face Larkin.
“I know the slutty schoolgirl look is a big turn on in the cuck community,” she sneered, “but surely there’s an age limit. Can you even remember high school?”
Harriet snorted. “Yeah, high school was the place where I used to beat up snotty little brats like you. Want to have a reunion? You have to promise not to go crying to the principal.”
She stepped forwards a little, placing herself squarely in the centre of the ring and spreading her arms out wide, a clear invitation for the Sin City Siren to join her.
“You couldn’t make cry on your best day, hag. But I guess it might be fun making you scream.”
Piper darted forwards and raised her hands up, ‘SMECk’ing into a collar and elbow. Her momentum drove Harriet back a half-step but the taller woman was quick to bring that height to bear, pressing downwards and forcing back to parity and then a half-step back the other way. It looked like Larkin might be pushing further back when Piper abruptly broke the clinch and flashed one hand to rake across the surprised redhead’s eyes!
Suddenly blinded by the younger girl’s claws, Larkin spun away and turned straight back again when she heard a giggle form behind.
“Get off the eyes Piper!” Merle yelled, but Sexton was too busy pointing and laughing at what she’d done.
“AHAHAHA! You look so ugly when you cry! I’m gonna do it agHEY!”
Bending forwards, Harriet charged forwards to wrap her hands around Sexton’s waist and barrelled right on through, pushing the surprised ingénue into a thudding back-first collusion with the corner. The shock rocked Piper’s head backwards and when it came back up the redhead slammed an elbow right into her nose. Hastily she threw up her hands, managing to get a sloppy guard in place before the New Mexican could splatter her nose.
“Get her out of the corner Harriet!” Merle yelled, but Harriet didn’t seem to hear, slamming a forearm into the blonde’s chest and then a Kneelift which landed juuuust north of her trunks.
Piper doubled forwards as Merle’s count reached three, leaving Larkin just enough time to jab a thumb into the squealing girls’ eye before she backed off.
“Oops. My finger slipped,” she said sarcastically to Merle, turning back to the temporarily blinded battler before the red-faced ref could respond.
Her hand swung out again for another forearm smash, but Piper ducked below it and thumped her shoulder into Larkin’s pale stomach, earning a small ‘oof’ noise as Harriet looped a hand around under her chin for a quick ‘n dirty Facelock. Presented with the tanned expanse of Sexton’s back Harriet opened her hand and swung a stinging slap down into the younger woman’s kidney. Piper shouted “COW!” and tried to tug herself backwards out of the Facelock, her struggles becoming even more pronounced when Larkin’s hand formed a claw and raaaaaaaked along her spine. She had almost reached the hollow between the Siren’s squirming shoulderblades when Piper exploded upwards and thwumped her forearm into the taller woman’s chest.
“Barely worth bothering with those beestings,” Piper sneered, both hands flashing out to grab handfuls of auburn locks.
A hard yank caused Larkin to hiss, but she was quick to retaliate by snatching Sexton’s tresses in return. The two stayed locked together, teeth gritted, bodies still apart from the occasional extra-hard tug.
“Get off the hair ladies!” Merle pleaded, but both girls paused for a second to simultaneously shout ‘SHUT UP!” at him.
They went right back to their tugging as the crowds roared along, clearly enjoying the sight of two bad girls tearing chunks out of each other. After a few more seconds and one particularly powerful tug from the Nevadan, Larkin broke the deadlock by turning her body sideways and jamming her shoulder into Sexton’s tits. The smaller woman was rocked back slightly, and the change of position allowed Harriet to use her hair hold to whip Piper over her shoulder.
HAIRMARE (@0.56) www.youtube.com/watch?v=woXurQgkKpA?t=46S
Sexton’s tush landed hard on the canvas, but she was more concerned about her hair, reaching up at a particular spot as Harriet triumphantly raised a few strands of snatched blonde locks.
“BYTCH!” Piper roared, spinning around onto her knees and eating a Kneelift to the chin from the redhead which drove her down to a seat again.
“You started the catty stuff, dickhead,” Larkin shrugged.
As the Sin City Siren sat back up the redhead took a few steps back to get a spring from the ropes and roared into a brutally stiff Low Dropkick.
LOW DROPKICK www.youtube.com/watch?v=iQ43jytmJj4
Sent tumbling backwards by the strike, Sexton stayed on the matt for a second then rolled her way to the corner, grabbing the ropes either side for supporting in pulling herself up.
“I’m going to snatch you bald you nasty…hey!”
She was interrupted by a light slap on her shoulder, Merle responding by shouting “Tag made!”
Piper turned around to glare at her partner in almost disbelief, but Addison only met her with a smirk.
“Thought you could use a chance to cool off babe,” she purred. “Don’t worry, I’ll handle this.”
“But I…”
Piper’s reply died in her throat as Allison had already slipped into the ring and Merle was now politely but firmly ushering her out. Seething, she allowed herself to be guided through the ropes as her partner stepped out into the ring. Addison’s hands were on her hips and she seemed almost apologetic, although her eyes were mocking, and when she spoke her voice dripped with sarcasm.
“Apologies for the rudeness of my friend. Piper finds it hard to hold her temper around nasty trailer park trash. But don’t worry, just step forward and you can receive your scheduled ass kicking like a good little libtard.”
Larkin cocked an eyebrow.
“Oh look, it’s generic rich girl number two! Maybe this one might have had at least one original…oh, wait right there…”
The interruption had come from her partner, Faulk loudly and repeatedly clearing her throat and then saying ‘pssst!’, an attempt at subtlety which was somewhat undermined because she was making the noise directly into a microphone in the ring post. Harriet held up one finger to Allison and retreated back to her corner without ever taking her eyes off the dangerous redhead.
“What is it?” she asked Faulk quietly.
The response was a ‘stage whisper’ loud enough for half of the arena to hear.
“THAT ONE’S WAAAY HOTTER THAN THE OTHER ONE!” Lyra gave a conspiratorial wink and continued. “She’s got great boobs for a skinny girl too. Can I have a go darl? Please please please?”
Allison, who had been stealthily advancing throughout this little exchange, glanced back and winked at a shocked-looking Piper before moving closer as the smaller member of FlC tried to usurp her partner.
Rolling her eyes, Larkin hissed, “I promise I’ll let you in a sec babe, I just want to WHOOLPH!”
The instant Harriet turned around Addison took advantage, dashing in and flicking up a stiff little front kick which buried into the taller woman’s crotch! Larkin’s knees went wobbly and her hands fell between her legs, leaving her defenceless for what came next.
With free rein to do as she wished Allison took a leaf from her partner’s book by grabbing two big handfuls of the hurting girl’s hair. Using that red mane as a lever she leaped in the air and kicked her legs out in front of her at the apex of the jump, yanking down hard so that Harriet’s porcelain features were smashed down into the barely-covered plywood.
SITOUT FACEBUSTER www.youtube.com/watch?v=0uH54njruvM
Chortling, Allison kept hold of one of her twin handfuls of hair and kneeled up over the dazed New Mexican. Twisting her wrist tightened her grip on Larkin’s head and she used her extra leverage to press down, the redhead wailing as her features were scrubbed on the rough canvas.
“I have soo many questions,” the Sorority Sister chortled, “how did you manage to simultaneously be skinny and flabby? And how did someone so ugly get hGAHHHH!”
Unhappy about the treatment her face had been receiving in the last thirty seconds, Harriet burst up onto her elbows and drove her head forwards, her forehead THWUMPing into the convenient target of Addison’s trunks. The Queen Bee let out a gasp and abandoned her hair hold in an instant, needing both hands to tend to her aching loins as Larkin reared in front of her. The taller redhead reared back and drove an elbow smash into Allison’s décolletage, but with Harriet’s vision still swimming form that mat scrubbing she abandoned any further offence and instead kept her promise by tagging in her partner.
Lyra ducked through the ropes and bounded over like a puppy, tackling the bigger girl in what looked more like a sort of running hug than a spear. Allison went down in a heap with the brunette on top of her, but she looked more disgusted than hurt, putting both hands one the smaller woman and pushin hard to roll her off. Faulk scrambled to a crouch and charged straight back in again but this time Addison was ready, one of those gorgeous long legs flicking out so that her boot buried into the onrushing FlC girls’ face.
Sent tumbling backwards, Lyra came to rest on her haunches, shaking her head slightly to clear the cobwebs. She scrabbled back upright just as Allison dashed in on her, swaying back away from the redhead’s attempted slap and then swishing behind her like a cool breeze. Demonstrating gravity-defying athleticism the newbie placed both hands on Addison’s shoulders and leaped up to ‘smeck’ her legs around the back of the taller woman’s head, throwing her torso backwards the instant she had done so. The redhead was ripped off her moorings and drive the back of her head into the canvas!
REVERSE FRANKENSTEINER www.youtube.com/watch?v=ensMvpB6THw
Completing an enforced somersault from the move’s momentum, Allison almost ended up back on her feet but couldn’t quite hold her equilibrium, dropping to her tush. One hand was up gingerly massaging the point where her skull had just impacted with the canvas, but her other hand raised wardingly towards the speedy Aussie minx, who had already made it back to vertical and was sprinting in. Before Addison could mount a defence she had both hands snatched out of her control, the brunette’s fishnet-covered legs snaking up and around then squeezing so that her deceptively powerful thighs crushed down on the sorority girl's shoulders.
LOTUS LOCK www.youtube.com/watch?v=DyMxFPPASns
“Pipes, get over here!” Allison screamed at her partner when a dozen seconds of squirming and struggling failed to get her out of the leggy vise. “Get this gap-toothed basic bitch offa me!”
Though Piper rolled her eyes and groaned at being told what to do, she nevertheless started coming to her sorority sister’s aid, languidly stepping one leg through the ropes. Merle quickly blocked off her entrance and ordered Sexton to retake her spot on the apron, but just the threat of interference was apparently enough to get Lyra to relinquish her hold. The speedster from Down Under skipped to her feet and pranced a lap around the inside of the ring, then she turned towards the nearest camera and flashed her pearly whites, no gap to be seen despite the aspersions cast by Addison.
“Invisalign,” she said to her foe with a smile and a wink. “We’re all dust in the end, but that’s no excuse for poor oral hygiene in the mean time!”
Allison rubbed the soreness out of her arms and shoulders and scowled, “Bitch, please. Your uggo muff muncher’s gonna choke on those teeth when she’s tongue-punching your fart-box tonight.”
Faulk seemed bemused rather than offended by the comment, and she turned towards her corner to exchange a shake of the head and a shrug with her partner. That brief lapse in focus allowed the Mean Girl to sprint forward and fire a Dropkick into Lyra’s upper back that sent the brunette careening forwards into the ropes. She rebounded from the steel cables and stumbled backwards, and Allison was already waiting on the mat following the Dropkick. Addison threaded an arm between Faulk’s alabaster thighs, the rolled her to the deck and pressed her shoulders to the canvas. Merle quickly slid down to the mat and counted out…
ONE!
TWO!
...before Lyra bucked loose, denying the sorority sister’s attempt to sneak a cheap win. The pair of wrestlers scrambled upright more or less simultaneously and lunged towards each other in the center of the ring. Whereas Allison aimed for another round of hairpulling in the Elbow-and-Collar, the flighty brunette opted for a repeat Frankensteiner, this time from the front. Faulk leapt
into the air and wrapped her thighs around the head of a very surprised Addison, but that was as far as she got before the Queen Bee quickly regained her wits and dropped to her knees to counter the acrobatic move with a simple Kneeling Powerbomb.
KNEELING POWERBOMB: www.youtube.com/watch?v=ltpA4A0Qx0g
With Lyra splattered and dazed for the time being, Allison pressed her palms on those upturned, sparkly haunches for another pin...
ONE!
TWO!
...and Faulk kicked free again, though she was much slower to rise this time after being driven to the deck. Addison had no such issues getting to her feet, but instead of pressing her advantage, she stalked to her corner and tagged in her blonde partner.
“Take the wheel for a bit,” she said as her lips curled in disgust. “Her cooch was all up in my face, and now I gotta wash the syphilis outta my mouth.”
Piper stepped in as Allison stepped out, then the redheaded half of Phi Theta Tappa hopped off the apron and approached the barricade. She snatched a massive sixty-four ounce soda from an unsuspecting fan and took a big gulp from the cardboard container. Rather than swallow, she tilted her head towards the ceiling and gargled for about ten seconds, then she spat the liquid back into the cup and handed it back to its original owner.
“Here ya go, buck-o,” Addison said as she clapped the man on the shoulder, making sure to get him on the sleeve rather than make any flesh-on-flesh contact. “You’re welcome for the souvenir.”
Meanwhile in the ring, Piper had bullied Lyra into sorority’s corner, and she pounded the Aussie with a few Haymakers that had the referee issuing a reprimand for using closed fists to the head. Sexton dragged Merle to the center of the ring to argue the point, thus allowing Allison to kneel on the apron and split Faulk’s thighs from behind with a punch to the privates while the official’s back was turned. Addison smirked as Lyra groaned and sank to a seat in the corner, then she hopped off the apron again and approached the same fan as before to dunk her right fist in his soda.
“Syphilis,” she offered as way of explanation while she washed her hand in his drink and wiped off on his shirt, then she shouted to her partner, “Bust that bitch!”
Spotting the vulnerable Faulk, Piper abruptly curtailed her argument and dismissed Merle with an upraised hand and an indignant huff of, “Whatever, sperglord!”
The blonde half of Phi Theta Tappa backed up to clear some space for take-off, clearly intending to take the wind out of Lyra’s sails with a classic Bronco Buster, but in doing so she unknowingly placed herself in the F.l.C. corner. Harriet was quick to make her pay with a Double Ear Clapper, and when a disoriented Sexton wheeled about to get eyes on her attacker, Larkin grabbed two fistfuls of flaxen hair and hopped off the apron. Piper suffered a short fall with a rough landing as her throat TWAANG’ED against the top rope, then she rebounded backwards and fell to the mat choking and gagging, courtesy of the Hot Shot.
“Hey! Hey, asshole!” a fuming Allison shouted at the referee. “Quit trying to suck your own dick and disqualify those fur-trading retards!”
If Merle had even been inclined to do such a thing before, surely the Mean Girl’s abusive language swung him the other way. The man offered nothing but a tepid warning to Harriet as she climbed back onto the apron and smirked at her fellow redhead, while Lyra seemed to be regaining her bearings after the Low Blow.
“The lady doth protest too much,” she said whimsically while she hauled the flagging Piper up into a tight Hammerlock. “Wins… losses… draws… all are as fleeting and ephemeral as existence itself.”
Faulk twirled around so that she and Sexton were face-to-face with the Hammerlock still secured, then she trapped the sorority sister’s head under and laid out on her back to drive Piper’s head into the canvas with a Hammerlock DDT.
HAMMERLOCK DDT www.youtube.com/watch?v=iTfCu6nNWiE
Despite -- or perhaps because of -- the nasty jolt that ran down her spine, Sexton flailed her leg out to the side and draped an ankle over the bottom rope. Denied a quick pin, Lyra simply sat on the mat next to her fallen opponent and playfully mussed Piper’s hair.
“GODDAMN IT! SHE’S MAULING HER IN THE ROPES!” Addison screeched at the official. “ENFORCE YOUR AUTHORITY! DON’T LET HER JUST CUCK YOU LIKE THAT!”
Neither Merle nor Lyra paid her any mind, and the latter continued to prattle, “Entropy comes for us all. Not even the great hydrogen atom -- long thought to be as fundamental as it was ubiquitous -- can flaunt the second great law of thermodynamics. Everything that we’ve known, everything that ever was, will be reduced to lonely subatomic particles floating in the void of space, brushing past each other and saying ‘hello’ and ‘goodbye’ at the speed of light…”
Faulk’s gaze became vacant and unfocused, and she waved at someone or something that apparently only she could see.
“HELLO…! HELLO…! Hello…! Hello…” she called out, her voice trailing off as if echoing before returning to its normal timbre. “Only a sea of fermions and bosons will remain --”
“-- but you two bitches will still be dickheads because dumb is forever!” Harriet shouted at the Mean Girl, which prompted a beaming Lyra to snap back to attention as she hopped to her feet.
“Oh, Harry!” the Aussie drawled. “I love when we --”
“-- finish each other’s --” Larkin continued without missing a beat.
“-- CHICKEN FINGERS!” Faulk shouted at the top of her lungs before planting a long, wet kiss on her partner.
The liplock apparently counted as a legal tag, and the two members of F.l.C. switched places once more, Harriet stepping through the ropes to enter the ring while Lyra hopped over the top to exit. Everyone else in the building was just incredibly, incredibly confused.
“What… the… fuck...” Allison said flatly, while Merle muttered a complaint under his breath about the increasingly abstract and obtuse forms of promos and trash talk that were finding their way into the federation.
Piper was equally confused, but she didn’t have her partner’s luxury of some ring ropes separating her from the madness. Instead of cursing she just took a few wary steps back as the taller redhead entered the fray.
“That walking STD you call a partner just accused me of being a fermion,” she spat, “I hope you’ve got some evidence cos after we whoop your asses I’ll be suing you both for slander.”
Rolling her eyes, Harriet growled, “Shut up and fight, dickhead,” and raised one hand up high, the traditional invitation for a test of strength.
Seething, Piper stormed in and reached for that hand, although at the same time her boot swung up between the older woman’s legs to YEOOOWWW!!! Quicker than the low blow, although only just, Harriet’s hand shot out and caught Sexton square in her left eye.
WRISTLOCK EYE POKE www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q6iormQArMk
The dirty blonde wheeled away clutching at her abused peeper while out on the apron Allison screamed, “DISQUALFY THE NASTY BYTCH IMMEDIATELY!” at Merle.
“Stay off the eyes Larkin!” Merle growled, earning a furious glare from Addison.
Harriet paid very little notice though, swinging a boot up into Sexton’s ribs and doubling the smaller girl forwards. It was the work of a second to hook her arms under Piper’s and then GGYEEAHHH! Spinning out from underneath the Hollow Girl’s attempted lock, Piper brought her hand over and jabbed the taller woman square in both eyes.
UNDERHOOK REVERSE EYE POKE www.youtube.com/watch?v=jYnw5Ag-x2Y
Staggering away, Larkin reached for her streaming eyes while pawing with her other hand at where she thought Piper was. The only problem was that the Sin City Siren had in fact moved, dancing around to the FlC girl’s front and launching a big forearm which clubbed into her jaw. Harriet, still blind had no defence, taking a swaying step back and then another as Piper repeated her swing. Feeling very in control now the blonde wound up her next shot, swinging her arm around a few times and then…just jabbing her fingers once more into Larkin’s eye sockets!
WIND-UP EYE POKE www.youtube.com/watch?v=5I2FRnnbhP0
“HAAAAAAAA!” Allison burst into a fit of giggles at ringside, Piper guffawing her way over and the pair almost collapsing with shared laughter. That only intensified as Merle came over and started remonstrating eagerly about warnings and disqualifications. In fact Sexton only sobered back up when Harriet’s vengeful form appeared beside the referee, the Siren’s eyes widening as Larkin spun through a tight little circle and emerged with one hand raised to…
DISCUS EYE POKE www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y2BDcYGdqG0
A loud squeal escaped Piper's lips and she flinched away clutching at her face, Larkin stomping after her. The redhead reached out and hooked one hand around the smaller woman’s face, her other hand coming across to rake into…
“WILL YOU ALL JUST STOP!”
Both girls wheeled around in surprise at the sheer volume of anger generated by the usually mild-mannered referee. Red-faced, Merle stomped forwards and paused for a second, then turned to wave a furious finger at Lyra.
“YOU! Stop going on about physics when you’re meant to be fighting. YOU!” He wheeled around and wagged that accusing digit at Allison. “Just shut up and stop complaining for one minute! And you two!” He spun back to Piper and Harriet. “If either of you even thinks about poking each other in the eyes again I’m going to disqualify you all and get the Three out here to clear the ring!”
There was another moment of silence, even the audience slightly shocked at Merle’s rage. Harriet raised a hand placatingly. “Calm your tits buddy, we’re just doing what comes…”
“SHE STARTED IT!” Piper stepped forwards and grabbed poor Merle’s lapels, her expression pleading. “You have to understand, it was self defence, she was going to URKK!” Having stepped quietly behind the blonde, Harriet ducked down and THUMPED a heartless uppercut between her legs. Sexton’s knees suddenly dropped and locked together, her mouth an ‘O’ of pain while her hands went to massage her.
“Sorry.” she said sarcastically to Merle’s apoplectic face. Before he could get any more angry the redhead yanked Sexton around and hooked in a tight front facelock. Sinews flexing, she lifted the mewling blonde upwards into Suplex stall position and then dropped her flat down, posting one leg out so that the small of Sexton’s back was snapped across it.
VERTICAL SUPLEX BACKBREAKER www.youtube.com/watch?v=C4bmgolkfYA
Rather enjoying the ‘urkk’ sound the Siren made as her vertebrae were realigned, Larkin gathered up one Nevadan leg and hooked it tight. Merle still seemed too angry to really pay attention, but after a deep breath he dropped and slapped the matt for…
ONE
TWO
Unseen by either Harriet or the referee Allison had slipped into the ring. Now she dashed in and sprung off her feet, sending a gorgeous Low Angle Dropkick into the side of the Hollow Girl’s head. Larkin sprawled off Piper and splatted down in a heap, Addison sending down a couple of quick stomps for good measure and then hooking both hands around her briefs.
A hard tug was enough to send the older woman into a wedgie-induced wail, Harriet scrambling to her feet to alleviate the cutting pain from her treacherous togs. Addison just giggled at this, but her voice turned mock-serious as she switched her grips to a twin claw hold buried in Larkin’s top.
“Get out of the ring Addison, I really will disqualify you!” Merle yelled, with no response from the sorority girl.
“Ughh, do these little pimples even count as boobs?” she scoffed. “It’s no wonder you turned to bean flicking, no red blooded man would even look at you!”
Harriet was too busy trying to simultaneously remove her bottoms from inside her and fight those clawholds. And she ended up doing neither, Allison clamping down hard and lifting her squirming burden up and back to send the other redhead crashing down on her back!
PUSH-UP PLEX www.youtube.com/watch?v=wUj65V7D0aw
Harriet rolled backwards out of the landing and splatted to her front, hands furiously massaging at her squeezed chest. Allison’s landing was far better, landing safely on her back and rolling to her knees, and looking at her hands in mock horror. “I’m going to need another volunteer to provide a handwash!” she called to the crowd, rising to her feet and THWAPPP!
Admittedly Lyra had been a little distracted by all of Merle’s shouting, but as soon as she had recofissed her attention she realised that her ‘friend’ was getting a two-on-one mugging in the ring. It only took her a second to slip through the ropes and then she dashed full tilt at the unsuspecting Sorority Sister, leaping
up and placing one foot on her thigh. That foothold gave her the perfect brace to launch into a secondary spin which ended in her boot impacting brutally into Addison’s cheekbone.
The Enzuigiri sent Allison flying in a mess of damp hair and limbs. Lyra looked after her longingly for a second then changed her mind, instead grabbing a big handful of the recovering Sexton’s hair and lifting her upwards.
“Harry darl?” she called playfully to her partner, “I definitely want to help with rubbing your tits better, but we who were living are now dying.”
At ringside everyone seemed to be just as confused at this as they were about almost everything else which had come out of the Chaos Emerald’s mouth tonight. But at least Harriet seemed to understand, giving her abused togs one last adjustment and then stepping to one side. Lyra grinned at her then spun to bury a sharp elbow into Piper’s liver, causing the blonde to gasp a little and slump forwards while Faulk took a few paces away.
No specific cue was apparent, but the two women moved in almost perfect synchronicity, albeit spinning in opposite directions. Lyra left her feet, one leg whirling out to deliver a gorgeous spinning roundhouse just as Harriet’s leg swept Piper at the knees. The dishevelled Siren was sent thundering backwards, coming to rest prone and glassy-eyed from the combination shot.
WHAT THE THUNDER SAID www.youtube.com/watch?v=wd2i8gSh-ks(@11.28)
Harriet dropped to hook her leg. Merle seemed a little busy eying up Faulk, who was still in the ring and offered him an encouraging-looking smile, but he dropped down and slapped the mat for…
ONE
TWO
...but a still-woozy Allison nevertheless managed to make the save by lunging into an Elbow Drop across Larkin’s shoulderblades to break the pin. Ignoring the referee’s orders for the time being, she rolled the stunned Harriet out of the ring while Lyra pouted from the apron, then Addison tried to revive her partner with a pair of harder-than-necessary slaps across the face.
“Get it together, Piper! We are NOT losing to another pair of rat-faced retards!” the redhead demanded, the sting of their exit from the tag team tournament at the hands of America’s Sweethearts still fresh in her mind.
Merle finally had enough and physically dragged her back to the Phi Theta Tappa corner, but for now it seemed that Allison was successful in at least partially rousing her sorority sister. As Larkin clambered back into the ring and stalked over to resume the assault on the waylaid blonde, Piper lashed out with one leg to boot Harriet in the groin and drop her to the mat.
“THAT’S IT! RIGHT IN THE BABYMAKER!” Addison screamed as Sexton scrambled over the last couple of feet to make the tag.
As soon Piper’s palm brushed against hers, Allison leapt onto the top rope and launched herself into the air a second time. Rather than indulge in any showy spins or flips as some of FAWN’s more accomplished aerialists might have, the Mean Girl simply kicked her legs out in front and came down with a basic yet effective Leg Drop right across Harriet’s chest.
SPRINGBOARD LEG DROP: www.youtube.com/watch?v=3C0XQcb7dUw
Addison bounced slightly from the impact, creating just enough of an opening for Larkin to roll onto her stomach to avoid an immediate pin. Harriet started crawling towards her partner’s outstretched arm, though she didn’t get very far before her fellow redhead plopped to a reverse straddle on her lower back. Having apparently fulfilled her per-match quota of actual wrestling moves with the Springboard Leg Drop, Allison returned to her catty roots by grabbing the Hollow Girl’s waistband and leaning back to punish Larkin’s undercarriage with a Wedgie.
“Hey, come on! I was gonna use that later!” Faulk complained to the referee as the other half of FlC yipped in displeasure.
When Merle sheepishly informed Lyra that such tactics were perfectly kosher -- and rather tame -- by FAWN standards, the brunette focused her attention on encouraging her partner to crawl over to make the tag.
“Don’t give in! Remember that every last one of your atoms was forged in the heart of a star!” she shouted in an attempt to provide a morale-boost, but a split second later Faulk’s expression turned blank as her train of thought derailed.
“...although technically, everything was forged in the heart of a star, so it’s not really that impressive…” the eccentric brunette added absentmindedly.
“Nnn… not the time, darling...” Larkin grunted while she dug her nails in the canvas to creep a few inches closer to safety even as Addison tried to saw her in half, though in the background Lyra continued to prattle on and on and on.
“The faded cheese stain on Merle’s shirt -- forged in the heart of a star. That sign in the third row that says ‘SHOW BOOBS’ -- forged in the heart of a star. This mole on the back of my hand that I should have checked out by a dermatologist -- forged in the heart of a star. The plutonium-239 used in thermonuc -- no, wait, that’s actually man-made!”
Faulk thrust her arm through the ropes so that her partner may have a closer look at her hand, and she shouted, “Don’t be like lame, old plutonium, Harry! Be like this random patch of melanocytes on --”
With a triumphant snarl and her foe still sitting on her back and working the Wedgie, Harriet stretched out those last few inches and slapped the brunette on the wrist. Lyra sprung into action the moment she became the legal woman, leaping from apron onto top rope and then again into the ring just as Allison had done. The Aussie was much more prone to acrobatics, however, so she turned a front somersault in midair while grabbing the very surprised Mean Girl’s head in a Three Quarters Facelock, then the newly-christened Chaos Emerald laid out on her back to jaw-jack Addison with a beautiful Springboard Diamond Dust.
SPRINGBOARD DIAMOND DUST: www.youtube.com/watch?v=pj9HlNTydW8
Freed from the oppressive Wedgie, Larkin rolled out onto the apron and fixed her briefs, smirking at her partner when Faulk offered to kiss it better in the locker room. Post-match plans made, Lyra rolled a groaning Allison onto her back, though instead of settling into a pin, Faulk popped up and made another run for the ropes. She hopped onto the uppermost strand with feline grace and pushed off again within the span of a heartbeat, flipping through the air and landing belly-to-belly atop the sorority sister.
SPRINGBOARD MOONSAULT: www.youtube.com/watch?v=ThxpvI3gSrk
This time Lyra did hook a leg for the pin, and with the Mean Girl splattered by the Springboard Moonsault, it seemed that FlC had victory well in hand. Merle quickly slid down to the mat next to the pair of wrestlers, but before he could even start to count, Piper reached under the bottom rope to grab his ankle and dragged him out onto the floor.
“What the hell, Piper?!” the official huffed as he spun around to face the blonde. “Give me one reason I shouldn’t --”
“MY CONTACT LENS!” Sexton shrieked while she held a hand over her left eye. “I LOST MY CONTACT LENS!”
“B -- but you don’t wear --”
“SHUT UP AND START SEARCHING, YOU LOW-T BETA-BITCH!”
Piper ignored the man’s further protests as she dropped down to her knees and started blindly groping around on the padded cement with one hand even as she clung to the referee’s ankle with the other to prevent him from reentering the ring. A few seconds later, Sexton spotted her partner bucking free from Faulk’s grasps before getting upright and blasting the brunette with a punt to the privates, then following up with an Inverted Facelock which turned into a vicious, Wedgie-assisted Reverse DDT that left Lyra splayed out in the middle of the ring.
REVERSE DDT: www.youtube.com/watch?v=fRcPz6d3HCs
“GODDAMN IT, MAN! WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!” Sexton screamed at the referee, abandoning her charade as if it had never happened now that her partner had turned the tables. “ALLIE’S IN THERE CARPIN’ ALL THOSE DIEMS AND YOU’RE OUT HERE FINGERBLASTING YOUR OWN ASSHOLE!”
Merle’s face turned beet red with anger and he was sorely, sorely tempted to give the sorority sister a piece of his mind, but with Addison now laid across Faulk’s body in a simple Crossbody pin, the referee had a job to do. He turned away from the smirking blonde with an angry huff, clambered back into the ring, and began to count, but yet again he was dragged out onto the floor, this time from the FlC side of the ring.
Clearly exasperated and at wit’s end, the referee turned towards Harriet and sighed, “Don’t tell me you lost your --”
Rather than offer any explanation at all, the Hollow Girl clasped the official behind the ears and pulled him into a tight, wet liplock. With his mouth suddenly full of Harriet’s tongue, Merle was so surprised that he found his body paralyzed and his mind blank, even when a salacious cheer of “WoooOOOoooOOO!” went up from the front row fans. Keeping her eyes open and fixed on the ring at all times, Larkin maintained the kiss for as long as it took for her partner to recover, and she shoved the man away the microsecond that Lyra got out from under Allison’s pin.
“Just double-checking to see if I’m a lesbian,” Harriet casually said.
The gears in Merle’s head ground into action once more, and he stuttered, “A-a-a-and?”
“If I wasn’t before, I definitely am now.”
The man’s face turned even more red than before as he threw up his hands and screeched, “Oh my God, why are you girls so mean?!”
A confused look crossed Harriet’s face.
“We’re in the middle of a wrestling match mister….whatever your name is. Maybe you could put your hatred of women aside and try to be professional?”
She grabbed him by the shoulders and spun the sputtering man roughly through 180°, giving him a shove to send him back out towards the action.
Whatever the referee’s thought might be about feminism, he was quickly distracted by the sight of Allison and Lyra. The two grapplers were locked together by mutual handfuls of hair, Allison mainly tugging at the shorter woman’s scalp while Faulk concentrated on yanking out the redhead’s bangs. The pair had tugged so hard that their faces were only a few inches apart, Faulk having placed one boot and then another on the taller woman’s knees to climb towards parity.
“Get off the hair right now or I’m throwing this match out!” Merle yelled.
Initially neither woman showed any response, but then a particularly vicious tug from the Meanest Girl brought a wail from Faulk. Apparently deciding she’d had enough, she jumped off from her awkward position and spun in the air while keeping a tight hold of Allison’s bangs. The result of this was that she dropped to her butt, apparently losing a good clump of strands from her scalp but compensating with a handful of auburn locks as the impromptu Jawbreaker caused Addison to bounce back upright.
Arms reeling back, Allison caught her balance and reached up to the suddenly thin-looking hair just above her forehead.
“That’s IT you rat-faced turbo-dyke!” she screeched at the Aussie. “I’m going to rip those cheap shorts off and make you eAOWW you SLUT!!”
Somehow Faulk had gone from sitting on the mat to being fully upright and several feet closer in the space of an eyeblink. She capitalised on that speed by SLAPPing one hand into the plump curve of Addison’s glutes and then digging her nails into a claw which had the redhead up on her tiptoes!
“Don’t stop there!” she giggled, “you were in the middle of a pretty fun sounding promise until GUHHH!”
Allison’s elbow flew out at perfect speed and height to smash clean into Lyra’s forehead, sending the smaller woman down hard to the canvas. This time she didn’t get up nearly as fast and the sorority girl capitalised by sending two heartless stomps into the ‘soft spot’ between Faulk’s legs.
The Chaos Emerald sat upright, her face making a silent scream from Allison brutalising her nethers. The redhead seemed pleased with her work so far but she was not quite done, grabbing yet another handful of hair and tugging Faulk up to her feet, although only for a second before another low blow doubled her forwards.
Guiding the gasping girl’s noggin between her legs, Addison reached forwards with the both hands to get a firm hold of those emerald-sequined bottoms! With Piper yelling encouragement from the sidelines the redhead squeezed down with her thighs and hauled up with her arms! Lyra felt the silk-covered-steel of Allison’s legs squeezing her skull, but this was nothing compared to the blinding-white hot agony as her togs sawed into her center thanks to the expertly-applied wedgie!
Both partners had already slipped into the ring, Harriet making a beeline for the pair only to be intercepted by a running tackle form Sexton. The two ladies landed in a heap of limbs and hair, and rolled over each other, slipping under the bottom rope and splatting onto the ringside matting. Allison watched this all happen then turned back to the fancy-dressed brunette wailing in her clutches.
“Looks like syphilitic bytch number two isn’t coming to save you!” she crowed, giving an extra hard tug until the skimpy material started to make a ripping noise.
Down below Lyra was feeling every bit of it, but she was also aware of the pitfalls of this hold, as proved when one of her hands reached up blindly behind her own head, fumbled for a second, and then…
“YEOWWW!” Allison released the wedgie and frantically set about prying the brunette’s hands away from her crotch.
With the sudden, blessed relief in her own nethers, Faulk dropped to her knees, although with her head still squeezed between the Mean Girl’s legs. The two fought for at least twenty seconds, one blindly reaching up and clawing at tender flesh, the other crushing down and scrabbling at her wrists.
The deadlock was punctuated by the sound of a skull bouncing off a ringpost. Sure enough, Harriet Larkin played a little percussion with Piper’s head and then let her collapse to the floor, scrambling back up into the ring and charging across with one arm outstretched. The Running Clothesline THWUMPED into Addison’s collarbone and sent her sprawling down, Lyra being sent tumbling alongside her.
But while the brunette was left on the mat to catch her breath and re-adjust those treacherous togs, it didn’t look like Harriet was offering Addison any such opportunity. Hair-hauling the redhead to her feet, Larkin thumped a heartless kick between her legs and then reached down as she slumped forwards. It was the work of an instant to capture Allison’s arms and tuck her head before the Hollow Girl dropped sharply to her back.
FALLS THE SHADOW www.youtube.com/watch?v=uyvtF48BHjA
Face driven into the canvas-covered plywood, Allison Addison slumped onto her front and stayed there while Larkin scrambled to her feet.
“Get out of the ring Larkin!” Merle yelled, getting no response as the redhead chose to talk to her partner.
“Lyra? Babe?” she called, earning a groan from the hurting Aussie. “I know you’re tired, but I need you. Things fall apart. The centre cannot hold.”
Faulk glanced up then nodded, one hand still rubbing at her readjusted togs. She gingerly stepped over towards the nearest corner, taking a slightly circuitous route so she could launch a quick kick into Addison’s ribs just as the Mean Girl rolled out of the ring. Then Lyra was up to the top rope before she swiftly transferred to her ivory-skinned partner’s shoulders.
Right on cue, Piper Sexton chose to make her return to the ring. She scrambled woozily under the bottom rope and to her feet, coming to a halt when confronted by the towering figure cast by her opponents.
“What the F” managed to escape her lips before Lyra dove off her perch, hooking mid-flight around the blonde’s neck and tucking her knees up.
The elevated Lungblower was a devastatingly effective mood in its own right, but unfortunately for Piper, it seemed that the new girls weren’t quite finished. As Faulk hung on tight to her neck, Harriet took a step back followed by two quick strides forwards before throwing herself into a Senton which smacked across Sexton’s back and crushed her tits even further into Lyra’s knees.
MERE ANARCHY www.youtube.com/watch?v=88QxPmnOc_k (@0:36)
Piper spasmed out of the devastating collusion like a fish on dry land, coming to rest on her side. Lyra almost tenderly rolled her onto her back and pressed her whole body down on top, Merle dropping to count…
ONE
TWO
THREE!
The referee gestured to the timekeeper and the bell rang out seconds later, heralding a win for FlC. Faulk didn’t move from her press though, looking down into Sexton’s closed eyes and murmuring something about how the semiconscious blonde clearly wasn’t the real Harley Quinn. Meanwhile Harriet looked pleased but also a little surprised as she came to clap Merle on the back.
“Thanks for letting us win even though she wasn’t the legal one!” she said brightly, turning away again.
Behind her Merle was still as a statue, face slowly reddening. After a few seconds he just stormed over to the ropes and stepped out of the ring, rubbing his eyes on his sleeve as he left the stage. In the ring, Larkin pulled her partner back upright and planted a kiss on her lips, which lingered far longer when Lyra reached up and tugged the redhead’s face down into her own. Up until that point the audience hadn’t really known how to react but now they all joined in cheers, responding as usual to any sort of tawdry display.
Eventually Lyra let go of her hair hold, although she bit down on Larkin’s bottom lip and streeeetched it out a little with her teeth before letting go entirely. Harriet glanced around, but by now they were alone in the ring, the PTT girls having slipped away to lick their wounds. Still Harriet raised Lyra’s hand and the two both bent into a theatrical curtsy. The crowd rained down cheers and boos in equal measure as they made their way out of the ring and up the ramp still holding hands.
The ring announcer stumbled over the words written on his cue card. He audibly groaned into his still-live microphone, and when he spoke again, his usual enthusiasm was replaced by the weary torpor of a man being forced to say something against his will.
“...of less than your mother, they are Allison Addison and Piper Sexton.”
Icona Pop’s “I Love It” pumped through the speakers, and a moment later a pair of young women just barely out of their teenage years stepped through the curtains, one redhead and one blonde. The Orlando crowd recognized them and remembered their past deeds, and the jeers rained from every nook and cranny of the packed FAWN Arena.
ALLISON ADDISON
PIPER SEXTON
Perhaps surprisingly, the pair of sorority sisters had opted for special wardrobes for All Hallow’s Evil. Piper had her blonde hair in a pair of loose side pigtails, and she was wearing a long-sleeved red, white and blue t-shirt bearing the slogan Daddy’s Lil Monster across the bust, along with denim booty shorts, fishnet stockings, and knee high black and white-laced boots. Meanwhile, fellow Phi Theta Tappa sister Allison wore her red hair loose and dressed in a forest green leotard inscribed with a leafy pattern along with matching green boots.
Marching down the center of the aisle so that they remained well out of reach of the fans at all times, the pair of wrestlers slid into the ring and claimed a corner for themselves. Merle came over to inspect for weapons and whatnot, though the referee got the feeling that their wardrobe was somehow vaguely familiar to him.
“Excuse me, but are the two of you dressed as movie characters or something?” he asked, prompting stereo snorts of disdain.
“I’m the vegan chick from that Clooney movie that wasn’t Ocean’s Eleven,” Allison explained while she rolled her eyes. “You know, the one with classic lines like ‘Ice to see you’ and ‘Let’s put a smile on that face’ and ‘MAARRRRTHAAAA!’”
A look of pure confusion came over Merle’s face and he started to protest only to be cut off by Piper.
“And I’m the baseball player from Academy-Award winner Suicide Team,” she said as she mimicked swinging a bat. “She’s the only one on the team who accepts Will Smith because everyone else is a racist who hates black people and family-friendly rap music you can dance to. Spoiler alert: she kills herself and rubs it in their stupid faces by leaving behind a suicide note that makes them all feel like shitheads.”
“Okay, that definitely doesn’t sound --”
Whatever Merle had in mind would be left unsaid as the speakers crackled to life with the ring announcer’s voice once more.
“And their opponents, weighing in tonight at a combined weight of 246lbs…hailing from Bright, Victoria, Australia, and from Santa Fe, New Mexico please welcome…Lyra Faulk and Harriet Larkin, the team known as…”
Before the announcer could give their team name he was overridden by a chiming, distorted, electric guitar.
A friend in need’s a friend indeed
PURE MORNING www.youtube.com/watch?v=DHQngnnHE_0
Sudden darkness in the FAWN arena, lights strobing through that blackness at random every few seconds. After a short while the strobes became more regular, beams of light from all angles throwing two figures into relief.
The foremost woman was already striding off towards the ring and the pair of costumed sorority girls waiting there. In contrast to her previous appearances she was dressed, perhaps surprisingly, in a tight green lycra one-piece, the top cut like a bodice while the bottom was cut to expose a good deal of her ivory-skinned flank. Her shockingly red hair fell in waves down to her shoulders, leaf designs stencilled on her arms and the whole look finished off with green boots.
HARRIET LARKIN
Her partner was taking a much slower path to the ring, eyes closed and dancing in time to the music. Or at least to some music; her intricate dance steps didn’t seem to be timed with what anyone else could hear. Her costume also consisted of a leotard, this one harlequinned in red and black and cut with long sleeves. She also wore full-length translucent tights underneath, leaving those long legs looking almost naturally coloured black and red. Her look was completed with black boots and a jester cap.
LYRA FAULK
Larkin waited at the bottom of the ramp for her partner, holding one hand out expectantly. Sure enough Lyra’s dancing took her almost perfectly to her partner’s side, the lights coming back on and Faulk’s eyes opening.
Then blinking several times in apparent confusion, she shouted, “Harry look, that must be the Earth-1 version of us!”
Sure enough, the crowd were realising that, somehow, both teams had managed to dress as Poison Ivy and Harley Quinn. Admittedly there were differences; the sorority girls shooting for the TV versions while Lyra had insisted that she and Harriet would be sticking to the original comic-book material. But still the situation could have been embarrassing. Faulk didn’t seem to think so though, dropping her partner’s hand and dashing up into the ring and over towards the slightly surprised sorority girls.
“G’day Harleen! G’day Pamela!” she shouted, holding out a hand to shake.
Neither Allison or Piper seemed to have any idea what she was talking about, so they just jointly flipped the bird at her until Larkin came over to drag her slightly upset looking partner away, muttering consolingly about how comic book villains are dicks in real life. The pair made it halfway back to their corner before coming across Merle, the junior referee looking quite pensive.
Lyra stopped, stepped up to him, took a piece of paper from her sleeve, and started reading from it.
“I’ve been told to tell you that I’m very sorry that I hurt your friend Algernon back at Fallout,” she said, voice remorseful and eyes fixed firmly on the paper. “Ms. Christian says I’ve to promise that I won’t hit you with any audio equipment for at least this whole match.”
If anything Merle looked even more anxious at this proclamation, taking a few steps away. But he remembered his manners, saying, “Uh…thank you miss, that’s…good to hear?”
Lyra glanced up at him, grinned shyly, then dashed off to her corner ready to begin the match.
Giving a quick peck on the cheek and a very cheerful-looking thumbs up to her partner, Lyra threaded herself through the ropes and took up a position on the apron, leaving Larkin to start things off for their team. Across the ring the sorority girls were engaging in a very animated game of rock, paper, scissors, accompanied by a whispered argument and a few quick re-tries.
Eventually Piper threw scissors to her partner’s paper. Allison pouted and looked like she might be about to argue until Sexton laid a reassuring hand on her shoulder and said, “Don’t worry babe, I’ll make sure there’s something left for you to play with.”
A smile crossed her face as she turned to face Larkin.
“I know the slutty schoolgirl look is a big turn on in the cuck community,” she sneered, “but surely there’s an age limit. Can you even remember high school?”
Harriet snorted. “Yeah, high school was the place where I used to beat up snotty little brats like you. Want to have a reunion? You have to promise not to go crying to the principal.”
She stepped forwards a little, placing herself squarely in the centre of the ring and spreading her arms out wide, a clear invitation for the Sin City Siren to join her.
“You couldn’t make cry on your best day, hag. But I guess it might be fun making you scream.”
Piper darted forwards and raised her hands up, ‘SMECk’ing into a collar and elbow. Her momentum drove Harriet back a half-step but the taller woman was quick to bring that height to bear, pressing downwards and forcing back to parity and then a half-step back the other way. It looked like Larkin might be pushing further back when Piper abruptly broke the clinch and flashed one hand to rake across the surprised redhead’s eyes!
Suddenly blinded by the younger girl’s claws, Larkin spun away and turned straight back again when she heard a giggle form behind.
“Get off the eyes Piper!” Merle yelled, but Sexton was too busy pointing and laughing at what she’d done.
“AHAHAHA! You look so ugly when you cry! I’m gonna do it agHEY!”
Bending forwards, Harriet charged forwards to wrap her hands around Sexton’s waist and barrelled right on through, pushing the surprised ingénue into a thudding back-first collusion with the corner. The shock rocked Piper’s head backwards and when it came back up the redhead slammed an elbow right into her nose. Hastily she threw up her hands, managing to get a sloppy guard in place before the New Mexican could splatter her nose.
“Get her out of the corner Harriet!” Merle yelled, but Harriet didn’t seem to hear, slamming a forearm into the blonde’s chest and then a Kneelift which landed juuuust north of her trunks.
Piper doubled forwards as Merle’s count reached three, leaving Larkin just enough time to jab a thumb into the squealing girls’ eye before she backed off.
“Oops. My finger slipped,” she said sarcastically to Merle, turning back to the temporarily blinded battler before the red-faced ref could respond.
Her hand swung out again for another forearm smash, but Piper ducked below it and thumped her shoulder into Larkin’s pale stomach, earning a small ‘oof’ noise as Harriet looped a hand around under her chin for a quick ‘n dirty Facelock. Presented with the tanned expanse of Sexton’s back Harriet opened her hand and swung a stinging slap down into the younger woman’s kidney. Piper shouted “COW!” and tried to tug herself backwards out of the Facelock, her struggles becoming even more pronounced when Larkin’s hand formed a claw and raaaaaaaked along her spine. She had almost reached the hollow between the Siren’s squirming shoulderblades when Piper exploded upwards and thwumped her forearm into the taller woman’s chest.
“Barely worth bothering with those beestings,” Piper sneered, both hands flashing out to grab handfuls of auburn locks.
A hard yank caused Larkin to hiss, but she was quick to retaliate by snatching Sexton’s tresses in return. The two stayed locked together, teeth gritted, bodies still apart from the occasional extra-hard tug.
“Get off the hair ladies!” Merle pleaded, but both girls paused for a second to simultaneously shout ‘SHUT UP!” at him.
They went right back to their tugging as the crowds roared along, clearly enjoying the sight of two bad girls tearing chunks out of each other. After a few more seconds and one particularly powerful tug from the Nevadan, Larkin broke the deadlock by turning her body sideways and jamming her shoulder into Sexton’s tits. The smaller woman was rocked back slightly, and the change of position allowed Harriet to use her hair hold to whip Piper over her shoulder.
HAIRMARE (@0.56) www.youtube.com/watch?v=woXurQgkKpA?t=46S
Sexton’s tush landed hard on the canvas, but she was more concerned about her hair, reaching up at a particular spot as Harriet triumphantly raised a few strands of snatched blonde locks.
“BYTCH!” Piper roared, spinning around onto her knees and eating a Kneelift to the chin from the redhead which drove her down to a seat again.
“You started the catty stuff, dickhead,” Larkin shrugged.
As the Sin City Siren sat back up the redhead took a few steps back to get a spring from the ropes and roared into a brutally stiff Low Dropkick.
LOW DROPKICK www.youtube.com/watch?v=iQ43jytmJj4
Sent tumbling backwards by the strike, Sexton stayed on the matt for a second then rolled her way to the corner, grabbing the ropes either side for supporting in pulling herself up.
“I’m going to snatch you bald you nasty…hey!”
She was interrupted by a light slap on her shoulder, Merle responding by shouting “Tag made!”
Piper turned around to glare at her partner in almost disbelief, but Addison only met her with a smirk.
“Thought you could use a chance to cool off babe,” she purred. “Don’t worry, I’ll handle this.”
“But I…”
Piper’s reply died in her throat as Allison had already slipped into the ring and Merle was now politely but firmly ushering her out. Seething, she allowed herself to be guided through the ropes as her partner stepped out into the ring. Addison’s hands were on her hips and she seemed almost apologetic, although her eyes were mocking, and when she spoke her voice dripped with sarcasm.
“Apologies for the rudeness of my friend. Piper finds it hard to hold her temper around nasty trailer park trash. But don’t worry, just step forward and you can receive your scheduled ass kicking like a good little libtard.”
Larkin cocked an eyebrow.
“Oh look, it’s generic rich girl number two! Maybe this one might have had at least one original…oh, wait right there…”
The interruption had come from her partner, Faulk loudly and repeatedly clearing her throat and then saying ‘pssst!’, an attempt at subtlety which was somewhat undermined because she was making the noise directly into a microphone in the ring post. Harriet held up one finger to Allison and retreated back to her corner without ever taking her eyes off the dangerous redhead.
“What is it?” she asked Faulk quietly.
The response was a ‘stage whisper’ loud enough for half of the arena to hear.
“THAT ONE’S WAAAY HOTTER THAN THE OTHER ONE!” Lyra gave a conspiratorial wink and continued. “She’s got great boobs for a skinny girl too. Can I have a go darl? Please please please?”
Allison, who had been stealthily advancing throughout this little exchange, glanced back and winked at a shocked-looking Piper before moving closer as the smaller member of FlC tried to usurp her partner.
Rolling her eyes, Larkin hissed, “I promise I’ll let you in a sec babe, I just want to WHOOLPH!”
The instant Harriet turned around Addison took advantage, dashing in and flicking up a stiff little front kick which buried into the taller woman’s crotch! Larkin’s knees went wobbly and her hands fell between her legs, leaving her defenceless for what came next.
With free rein to do as she wished Allison took a leaf from her partner’s book by grabbing two big handfuls of the hurting girl’s hair. Using that red mane as a lever she leaped in the air and kicked her legs out in front of her at the apex of the jump, yanking down hard so that Harriet’s porcelain features were smashed down into the barely-covered plywood.
SITOUT FACEBUSTER www.youtube.com/watch?v=0uH54njruvM
Chortling, Allison kept hold of one of her twin handfuls of hair and kneeled up over the dazed New Mexican. Twisting her wrist tightened her grip on Larkin’s head and she used her extra leverage to press down, the redhead wailing as her features were scrubbed on the rough canvas.
“I have soo many questions,” the Sorority Sister chortled, “how did you manage to simultaneously be skinny and flabby? And how did someone so ugly get hGAHHHH!”
Unhappy about the treatment her face had been receiving in the last thirty seconds, Harriet burst up onto her elbows and drove her head forwards, her forehead THWUMPing into the convenient target of Addison’s trunks. The Queen Bee let out a gasp and abandoned her hair hold in an instant, needing both hands to tend to her aching loins as Larkin reared in front of her. The taller redhead reared back and drove an elbow smash into Allison’s décolletage, but with Harriet’s vision still swimming form that mat scrubbing she abandoned any further offence and instead kept her promise by tagging in her partner.
Lyra ducked through the ropes and bounded over like a puppy, tackling the bigger girl in what looked more like a sort of running hug than a spear. Allison went down in a heap with the brunette on top of her, but she looked more disgusted than hurt, putting both hands one the smaller woman and pushin hard to roll her off. Faulk scrambled to a crouch and charged straight back in again but this time Addison was ready, one of those gorgeous long legs flicking out so that her boot buried into the onrushing FlC girls’ face.
Sent tumbling backwards, Lyra came to rest on her haunches, shaking her head slightly to clear the cobwebs. She scrabbled back upright just as Allison dashed in on her, swaying back away from the redhead’s attempted slap and then swishing behind her like a cool breeze. Demonstrating gravity-defying athleticism the newbie placed both hands on Addison’s shoulders and leaped up to ‘smeck’ her legs around the back of the taller woman’s head, throwing her torso backwards the instant she had done so. The redhead was ripped off her moorings and drive the back of her head into the canvas!
REVERSE FRANKENSTEINER www.youtube.com/watch?v=ensMvpB6THw
Completing an enforced somersault from the move’s momentum, Allison almost ended up back on her feet but couldn’t quite hold her equilibrium, dropping to her tush. One hand was up gingerly massaging the point where her skull had just impacted with the canvas, but her other hand raised wardingly towards the speedy Aussie minx, who had already made it back to vertical and was sprinting in. Before Addison could mount a defence she had both hands snatched out of her control, the brunette’s fishnet-covered legs snaking up and around then squeezing so that her deceptively powerful thighs crushed down on the sorority girl's shoulders.
LOTUS LOCK www.youtube.com/watch?v=DyMxFPPASns
“Pipes, get over here!” Allison screamed at her partner when a dozen seconds of squirming and struggling failed to get her out of the leggy vise. “Get this gap-toothed basic bitch offa me!”
Though Piper rolled her eyes and groaned at being told what to do, she nevertheless started coming to her sorority sister’s aid, languidly stepping one leg through the ropes. Merle quickly blocked off her entrance and ordered Sexton to retake her spot on the apron, but just the threat of interference was apparently enough to get Lyra to relinquish her hold. The speedster from Down Under skipped to her feet and pranced a lap around the inside of the ring, then she turned towards the nearest camera and flashed her pearly whites, no gap to be seen despite the aspersions cast by Addison.
“Invisalign,” she said to her foe with a smile and a wink. “We’re all dust in the end, but that’s no excuse for poor oral hygiene in the mean time!”
Allison rubbed the soreness out of her arms and shoulders and scowled, “Bitch, please. Your uggo muff muncher’s gonna choke on those teeth when she’s tongue-punching your fart-box tonight.”
Faulk seemed bemused rather than offended by the comment, and she turned towards her corner to exchange a shake of the head and a shrug with her partner. That brief lapse in focus allowed the Mean Girl to sprint forward and fire a Dropkick into Lyra’s upper back that sent the brunette careening forwards into the ropes. She rebounded from the steel cables and stumbled backwards, and Allison was already waiting on the mat following the Dropkick. Addison threaded an arm between Faulk’s alabaster thighs, the rolled her to the deck and pressed her shoulders to the canvas. Merle quickly slid down to the mat and counted out…
ONE!
TWO!
...before Lyra bucked loose, denying the sorority sister’s attempt to sneak a cheap win. The pair of wrestlers scrambled upright more or less simultaneously and lunged towards each other in the center of the ring. Whereas Allison aimed for another round of hairpulling in the Elbow-and-Collar, the flighty brunette opted for a repeat Frankensteiner, this time from the front. Faulk leapt
into the air and wrapped her thighs around the head of a very surprised Addison, but that was as far as she got before the Queen Bee quickly regained her wits and dropped to her knees to counter the acrobatic move with a simple Kneeling Powerbomb.
KNEELING POWERBOMB: www.youtube.com/watch?v=ltpA4A0Qx0g
With Lyra splattered and dazed for the time being, Allison pressed her palms on those upturned, sparkly haunches for another pin...
ONE!
TWO!
...and Faulk kicked free again, though she was much slower to rise this time after being driven to the deck. Addison had no such issues getting to her feet, but instead of pressing her advantage, she stalked to her corner and tagged in her blonde partner.
“Take the wheel for a bit,” she said as her lips curled in disgust. “Her cooch was all up in my face, and now I gotta wash the syphilis outta my mouth.”
Piper stepped in as Allison stepped out, then the redheaded half of Phi Theta Tappa hopped off the apron and approached the barricade. She snatched a massive sixty-four ounce soda from an unsuspecting fan and took a big gulp from the cardboard container. Rather than swallow, she tilted her head towards the ceiling and gargled for about ten seconds, then she spat the liquid back into the cup and handed it back to its original owner.
“Here ya go, buck-o,” Addison said as she clapped the man on the shoulder, making sure to get him on the sleeve rather than make any flesh-on-flesh contact. “You’re welcome for the souvenir.”
Meanwhile in the ring, Piper had bullied Lyra into sorority’s corner, and she pounded the Aussie with a few Haymakers that had the referee issuing a reprimand for using closed fists to the head. Sexton dragged Merle to the center of the ring to argue the point, thus allowing Allison to kneel on the apron and split Faulk’s thighs from behind with a punch to the privates while the official’s back was turned. Addison smirked as Lyra groaned and sank to a seat in the corner, then she hopped off the apron again and approached the same fan as before to dunk her right fist in his soda.
“Syphilis,” she offered as way of explanation while she washed her hand in his drink and wiped off on his shirt, then she shouted to her partner, “Bust that bitch!”
Spotting the vulnerable Faulk, Piper abruptly curtailed her argument and dismissed Merle with an upraised hand and an indignant huff of, “Whatever, sperglord!”
The blonde half of Phi Theta Tappa backed up to clear some space for take-off, clearly intending to take the wind out of Lyra’s sails with a classic Bronco Buster, but in doing so she unknowingly placed herself in the F.l.C. corner. Harriet was quick to make her pay with a Double Ear Clapper, and when a disoriented Sexton wheeled about to get eyes on her attacker, Larkin grabbed two fistfuls of flaxen hair and hopped off the apron. Piper suffered a short fall with a rough landing as her throat TWAANG’ED against the top rope, then she rebounded backwards and fell to the mat choking and gagging, courtesy of the Hot Shot.
“Hey! Hey, asshole!” a fuming Allison shouted at the referee. “Quit trying to suck your own dick and disqualify those fur-trading retards!”
If Merle had even been inclined to do such a thing before, surely the Mean Girl’s abusive language swung him the other way. The man offered nothing but a tepid warning to Harriet as she climbed back onto the apron and smirked at her fellow redhead, while Lyra seemed to be regaining her bearings after the Low Blow.
“The lady doth protest too much,” she said whimsically while she hauled the flagging Piper up into a tight Hammerlock. “Wins… losses… draws… all are as fleeting and ephemeral as existence itself.”
Faulk twirled around so that she and Sexton were face-to-face with the Hammerlock still secured, then she trapped the sorority sister’s head under and laid out on her back to drive Piper’s head into the canvas with a Hammerlock DDT.
HAMMERLOCK DDT www.youtube.com/watch?v=iTfCu6nNWiE
Despite -- or perhaps because of -- the nasty jolt that ran down her spine, Sexton flailed her leg out to the side and draped an ankle over the bottom rope. Denied a quick pin, Lyra simply sat on the mat next to her fallen opponent and playfully mussed Piper’s hair.
“GODDAMN IT! SHE’S MAULING HER IN THE ROPES!” Addison screeched at the official. “ENFORCE YOUR AUTHORITY! DON’T LET HER JUST CUCK YOU LIKE THAT!”
Neither Merle nor Lyra paid her any mind, and the latter continued to prattle, “Entropy comes for us all. Not even the great hydrogen atom -- long thought to be as fundamental as it was ubiquitous -- can flaunt the second great law of thermodynamics. Everything that we’ve known, everything that ever was, will be reduced to lonely subatomic particles floating in the void of space, brushing past each other and saying ‘hello’ and ‘goodbye’ at the speed of light…”
Faulk’s gaze became vacant and unfocused, and she waved at someone or something that apparently only she could see.
“HELLO…! HELLO…! Hello…! Hello…” she called out, her voice trailing off as if echoing before returning to its normal timbre. “Only a sea of fermions and bosons will remain --”
“-- but you two bitches will still be dickheads because dumb is forever!” Harriet shouted at the Mean Girl, which prompted a beaming Lyra to snap back to attention as she hopped to her feet.
“Oh, Harry!” the Aussie drawled. “I love when we --”
“-- finish each other’s --” Larkin continued without missing a beat.
“-- CHICKEN FINGERS!” Faulk shouted at the top of her lungs before planting a long, wet kiss on her partner.
The liplock apparently counted as a legal tag, and the two members of F.l.C. switched places once more, Harriet stepping through the ropes to enter the ring while Lyra hopped over the top to exit. Everyone else in the building was just incredibly, incredibly confused.
“What… the… fuck...” Allison said flatly, while Merle muttered a complaint under his breath about the increasingly abstract and obtuse forms of promos and trash talk that were finding their way into the federation.
Piper was equally confused, but she didn’t have her partner’s luxury of some ring ropes separating her from the madness. Instead of cursing she just took a few wary steps back as the taller redhead entered the fray.
“That walking STD you call a partner just accused me of being a fermion,” she spat, “I hope you’ve got some evidence cos after we whoop your asses I’ll be suing you both for slander.”
Rolling her eyes, Harriet growled, “Shut up and fight, dickhead,” and raised one hand up high, the traditional invitation for a test of strength.
Seething, Piper stormed in and reached for that hand, although at the same time her boot swung up between the older woman’s legs to YEOOOWWW!!! Quicker than the low blow, although only just, Harriet’s hand shot out and caught Sexton square in her left eye.
WRISTLOCK EYE POKE www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q6iormQArMk
The dirty blonde wheeled away clutching at her abused peeper while out on the apron Allison screamed, “DISQUALFY THE NASTY BYTCH IMMEDIATELY!” at Merle.
“Stay off the eyes Larkin!” Merle growled, earning a furious glare from Addison.
Harriet paid very little notice though, swinging a boot up into Sexton’s ribs and doubling the smaller girl forwards. It was the work of a second to hook her arms under Piper’s and then GGYEEAHHH! Spinning out from underneath the Hollow Girl’s attempted lock, Piper brought her hand over and jabbed the taller woman square in both eyes.
UNDERHOOK REVERSE EYE POKE www.youtube.com/watch?v=jYnw5Ag-x2Y
Staggering away, Larkin reached for her streaming eyes while pawing with her other hand at where she thought Piper was. The only problem was that the Sin City Siren had in fact moved, dancing around to the FlC girl’s front and launching a big forearm which clubbed into her jaw. Harriet, still blind had no defence, taking a swaying step back and then another as Piper repeated her swing. Feeling very in control now the blonde wound up her next shot, swinging her arm around a few times and then…just jabbing her fingers once more into Larkin’s eye sockets!
WIND-UP EYE POKE www.youtube.com/watch?v=5I2FRnnbhP0
“HAAAAAAAA!” Allison burst into a fit of giggles at ringside, Piper guffawing her way over and the pair almost collapsing with shared laughter. That only intensified as Merle came over and started remonstrating eagerly about warnings and disqualifications. In fact Sexton only sobered back up when Harriet’s vengeful form appeared beside the referee, the Siren’s eyes widening as Larkin spun through a tight little circle and emerged with one hand raised to…
DISCUS EYE POKE www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y2BDcYGdqG0
A loud squeal escaped Piper's lips and she flinched away clutching at her face, Larkin stomping after her. The redhead reached out and hooked one hand around the smaller woman’s face, her other hand coming across to rake into…
“WILL YOU ALL JUST STOP!”
Both girls wheeled around in surprise at the sheer volume of anger generated by the usually mild-mannered referee. Red-faced, Merle stomped forwards and paused for a second, then turned to wave a furious finger at Lyra.
“YOU! Stop going on about physics when you’re meant to be fighting. YOU!” He wheeled around and wagged that accusing digit at Allison. “Just shut up and stop complaining for one minute! And you two!” He spun back to Piper and Harriet. “If either of you even thinks about poking each other in the eyes again I’m going to disqualify you all and get the Three out here to clear the ring!”
There was another moment of silence, even the audience slightly shocked at Merle’s rage. Harriet raised a hand placatingly. “Calm your tits buddy, we’re just doing what comes…”
“SHE STARTED IT!” Piper stepped forwards and grabbed poor Merle’s lapels, her expression pleading. “You have to understand, it was self defence, she was going to URKK!” Having stepped quietly behind the blonde, Harriet ducked down and THUMPED a heartless uppercut between her legs. Sexton’s knees suddenly dropped and locked together, her mouth an ‘O’ of pain while her hands went to massage her.
“Sorry.” she said sarcastically to Merle’s apoplectic face. Before he could get any more angry the redhead yanked Sexton around and hooked in a tight front facelock. Sinews flexing, she lifted the mewling blonde upwards into Suplex stall position and then dropped her flat down, posting one leg out so that the small of Sexton’s back was snapped across it.
VERTICAL SUPLEX BACKBREAKER www.youtube.com/watch?v=C4bmgolkfYA
Rather enjoying the ‘urkk’ sound the Siren made as her vertebrae were realigned, Larkin gathered up one Nevadan leg and hooked it tight. Merle still seemed too angry to really pay attention, but after a deep breath he dropped and slapped the matt for…
ONE
TWO
Unseen by either Harriet or the referee Allison had slipped into the ring. Now she dashed in and sprung off her feet, sending a gorgeous Low Angle Dropkick into the side of the Hollow Girl’s head. Larkin sprawled off Piper and splatted down in a heap, Addison sending down a couple of quick stomps for good measure and then hooking both hands around her briefs.
A hard tug was enough to send the older woman into a wedgie-induced wail, Harriet scrambling to her feet to alleviate the cutting pain from her treacherous togs. Addison just giggled at this, but her voice turned mock-serious as she switched her grips to a twin claw hold buried in Larkin’s top.
“Get out of the ring Addison, I really will disqualify you!” Merle yelled, with no response from the sorority girl.
“Ughh, do these little pimples even count as boobs?” she scoffed. “It’s no wonder you turned to bean flicking, no red blooded man would even look at you!”
Harriet was too busy trying to simultaneously remove her bottoms from inside her and fight those clawholds. And she ended up doing neither, Allison clamping down hard and lifting her squirming burden up and back to send the other redhead crashing down on her back!
PUSH-UP PLEX www.youtube.com/watch?v=wUj65V7D0aw
Harriet rolled backwards out of the landing and splatted to her front, hands furiously massaging at her squeezed chest. Allison’s landing was far better, landing safely on her back and rolling to her knees, and looking at her hands in mock horror. “I’m going to need another volunteer to provide a handwash!” she called to the crowd, rising to her feet and THWAPPP!
Admittedly Lyra had been a little distracted by all of Merle’s shouting, but as soon as she had recofissed her attention she realised that her ‘friend’ was getting a two-on-one mugging in the ring. It only took her a second to slip through the ropes and then she dashed full tilt at the unsuspecting Sorority Sister, leaping
up and placing one foot on her thigh. That foothold gave her the perfect brace to launch into a secondary spin which ended in her boot impacting brutally into Addison’s cheekbone.
The Enzuigiri sent Allison flying in a mess of damp hair and limbs. Lyra looked after her longingly for a second then changed her mind, instead grabbing a big handful of the recovering Sexton’s hair and lifting her upwards.
“Harry darl?” she called playfully to her partner, “I definitely want to help with rubbing your tits better, but we who were living are now dying.”
At ringside everyone seemed to be just as confused at this as they were about almost everything else which had come out of the Chaos Emerald’s mouth tonight. But at least Harriet seemed to understand, giving her abused togs one last adjustment and then stepping to one side. Lyra grinned at her then spun to bury a sharp elbow into Piper’s liver, causing the blonde to gasp a little and slump forwards while Faulk took a few paces away.
No specific cue was apparent, but the two women moved in almost perfect synchronicity, albeit spinning in opposite directions. Lyra left her feet, one leg whirling out to deliver a gorgeous spinning roundhouse just as Harriet’s leg swept Piper at the knees. The dishevelled Siren was sent thundering backwards, coming to rest prone and glassy-eyed from the combination shot.
WHAT THE THUNDER SAID www.youtube.com/watch?v=wd2i8gSh-ks(@11.28)
Harriet dropped to hook her leg. Merle seemed a little busy eying up Faulk, who was still in the ring and offered him an encouraging-looking smile, but he dropped down and slapped the mat for…
ONE
TWO
...but a still-woozy Allison nevertheless managed to make the save by lunging into an Elbow Drop across Larkin’s shoulderblades to break the pin. Ignoring the referee’s orders for the time being, she rolled the stunned Harriet out of the ring while Lyra pouted from the apron, then Addison tried to revive her partner with a pair of harder-than-necessary slaps across the face.
“Get it together, Piper! We are NOT losing to another pair of rat-faced retards!” the redhead demanded, the sting of their exit from the tag team tournament at the hands of America’s Sweethearts still fresh in her mind.
Merle finally had enough and physically dragged her back to the Phi Theta Tappa corner, but for now it seemed that Allison was successful in at least partially rousing her sorority sister. As Larkin clambered back into the ring and stalked over to resume the assault on the waylaid blonde, Piper lashed out with one leg to boot Harriet in the groin and drop her to the mat.
“THAT’S IT! RIGHT IN THE BABYMAKER!” Addison screamed as Sexton scrambled over the last couple of feet to make the tag.
As soon Piper’s palm brushed against hers, Allison leapt onto the top rope and launched herself into the air a second time. Rather than indulge in any showy spins or flips as some of FAWN’s more accomplished aerialists might have, the Mean Girl simply kicked her legs out in front and came down with a basic yet effective Leg Drop right across Harriet’s chest.
SPRINGBOARD LEG DROP: www.youtube.com/watch?v=3C0XQcb7dUw
Addison bounced slightly from the impact, creating just enough of an opening for Larkin to roll onto her stomach to avoid an immediate pin. Harriet started crawling towards her partner’s outstretched arm, though she didn’t get very far before her fellow redhead plopped to a reverse straddle on her lower back. Having apparently fulfilled her per-match quota of actual wrestling moves with the Springboard Leg Drop, Allison returned to her catty roots by grabbing the Hollow Girl’s waistband and leaning back to punish Larkin’s undercarriage with a Wedgie.
“Hey, come on! I was gonna use that later!” Faulk complained to the referee as the other half of FlC yipped in displeasure.
When Merle sheepishly informed Lyra that such tactics were perfectly kosher -- and rather tame -- by FAWN standards, the brunette focused her attention on encouraging her partner to crawl over to make the tag.
“Don’t give in! Remember that every last one of your atoms was forged in the heart of a star!” she shouted in an attempt to provide a morale-boost, but a split second later Faulk’s expression turned blank as her train of thought derailed.
“...although technically, everything was forged in the heart of a star, so it’s not really that impressive…” the eccentric brunette added absentmindedly.
“Nnn… not the time, darling...” Larkin grunted while she dug her nails in the canvas to creep a few inches closer to safety even as Addison tried to saw her in half, though in the background Lyra continued to prattle on and on and on.
“The faded cheese stain on Merle’s shirt -- forged in the heart of a star. That sign in the third row that says ‘SHOW BOOBS’ -- forged in the heart of a star. This mole on the back of my hand that I should have checked out by a dermatologist -- forged in the heart of a star. The plutonium-239 used in thermonuc -- no, wait, that’s actually man-made!”
Faulk thrust her arm through the ropes so that her partner may have a closer look at her hand, and she shouted, “Don’t be like lame, old plutonium, Harry! Be like this random patch of melanocytes on --”
With a triumphant snarl and her foe still sitting on her back and working the Wedgie, Harriet stretched out those last few inches and slapped the brunette on the wrist. Lyra sprung into action the moment she became the legal woman, leaping from apron onto top rope and then again into the ring just as Allison had done. The Aussie was much more prone to acrobatics, however, so she turned a front somersault in midair while grabbing the very surprised Mean Girl’s head in a Three Quarters Facelock, then the newly-christened Chaos Emerald laid out on her back to jaw-jack Addison with a beautiful Springboard Diamond Dust.
SPRINGBOARD DIAMOND DUST: www.youtube.com/watch?v=pj9HlNTydW8
Freed from the oppressive Wedgie, Larkin rolled out onto the apron and fixed her briefs, smirking at her partner when Faulk offered to kiss it better in the locker room. Post-match plans made, Lyra rolled a groaning Allison onto her back, though instead of settling into a pin, Faulk popped up and made another run for the ropes. She hopped onto the uppermost strand with feline grace and pushed off again within the span of a heartbeat, flipping through the air and landing belly-to-belly atop the sorority sister.
SPRINGBOARD MOONSAULT: www.youtube.com/watch?v=ThxpvI3gSrk
This time Lyra did hook a leg for the pin, and with the Mean Girl splattered by the Springboard Moonsault, it seemed that FlC had victory well in hand. Merle quickly slid down to the mat next to the pair of wrestlers, but before he could even start to count, Piper reached under the bottom rope to grab his ankle and dragged him out onto the floor.
“What the hell, Piper?!” the official huffed as he spun around to face the blonde. “Give me one reason I shouldn’t --”
“MY CONTACT LENS!” Sexton shrieked while she held a hand over her left eye. “I LOST MY CONTACT LENS!”
“B -- but you don’t wear --”
“SHUT UP AND START SEARCHING, YOU LOW-T BETA-BITCH!”
Piper ignored the man’s further protests as she dropped down to her knees and started blindly groping around on the padded cement with one hand even as she clung to the referee’s ankle with the other to prevent him from reentering the ring. A few seconds later, Sexton spotted her partner bucking free from Faulk’s grasps before getting upright and blasting the brunette with a punt to the privates, then following up with an Inverted Facelock which turned into a vicious, Wedgie-assisted Reverse DDT that left Lyra splayed out in the middle of the ring.
REVERSE DDT: www.youtube.com/watch?v=fRcPz6d3HCs
“GODDAMN IT, MAN! WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!” Sexton screamed at the referee, abandoning her charade as if it had never happened now that her partner had turned the tables. “ALLIE’S IN THERE CARPIN’ ALL THOSE DIEMS AND YOU’RE OUT HERE FINGERBLASTING YOUR OWN ASSHOLE!”
Merle’s face turned beet red with anger and he was sorely, sorely tempted to give the sorority sister a piece of his mind, but with Addison now laid across Faulk’s body in a simple Crossbody pin, the referee had a job to do. He turned away from the smirking blonde with an angry huff, clambered back into the ring, and began to count, but yet again he was dragged out onto the floor, this time from the FlC side of the ring.
Clearly exasperated and at wit’s end, the referee turned towards Harriet and sighed, “Don’t tell me you lost your --”
Rather than offer any explanation at all, the Hollow Girl clasped the official behind the ears and pulled him into a tight, wet liplock. With his mouth suddenly full of Harriet’s tongue, Merle was so surprised that he found his body paralyzed and his mind blank, even when a salacious cheer of “WoooOOOoooOOO!” went up from the front row fans. Keeping her eyes open and fixed on the ring at all times, Larkin maintained the kiss for as long as it took for her partner to recover, and she shoved the man away the microsecond that Lyra got out from under Allison’s pin.
“Just double-checking to see if I’m a lesbian,” Harriet casually said.
The gears in Merle’s head ground into action once more, and he stuttered, “A-a-a-and?”
“If I wasn’t before, I definitely am now.”
The man’s face turned even more red than before as he threw up his hands and screeched, “Oh my God, why are you girls so mean?!”
A confused look crossed Harriet’s face.
“We’re in the middle of a wrestling match mister….whatever your name is. Maybe you could put your hatred of women aside and try to be professional?”
She grabbed him by the shoulders and spun the sputtering man roughly through 180°, giving him a shove to send him back out towards the action.
Whatever the referee’s thought might be about feminism, he was quickly distracted by the sight of Allison and Lyra. The two grapplers were locked together by mutual handfuls of hair, Allison mainly tugging at the shorter woman’s scalp while Faulk concentrated on yanking out the redhead’s bangs. The pair had tugged so hard that their faces were only a few inches apart, Faulk having placed one boot and then another on the taller woman’s knees to climb towards parity.
“Get off the hair right now or I’m throwing this match out!” Merle yelled.
Initially neither woman showed any response, but then a particularly vicious tug from the Meanest Girl brought a wail from Faulk. Apparently deciding she’d had enough, she jumped off from her awkward position and spun in the air while keeping a tight hold of Allison’s bangs. The result of this was that she dropped to her butt, apparently losing a good clump of strands from her scalp but compensating with a handful of auburn locks as the impromptu Jawbreaker caused Addison to bounce back upright.
Arms reeling back, Allison caught her balance and reached up to the suddenly thin-looking hair just above her forehead.
“That’s IT you rat-faced turbo-dyke!” she screeched at the Aussie. “I’m going to rip those cheap shorts off and make you eAOWW you SLUT!!”
Somehow Faulk had gone from sitting on the mat to being fully upright and several feet closer in the space of an eyeblink. She capitalised on that speed by SLAPPing one hand into the plump curve of Addison’s glutes and then digging her nails into a claw which had the redhead up on her tiptoes!
“Don’t stop there!” she giggled, “you were in the middle of a pretty fun sounding promise until GUHHH!”
Allison’s elbow flew out at perfect speed and height to smash clean into Lyra’s forehead, sending the smaller woman down hard to the canvas. This time she didn’t get up nearly as fast and the sorority girl capitalised by sending two heartless stomps into the ‘soft spot’ between Faulk’s legs.
The Chaos Emerald sat upright, her face making a silent scream from Allison brutalising her nethers. The redhead seemed pleased with her work so far but she was not quite done, grabbing yet another handful of hair and tugging Faulk up to her feet, although only for a second before another low blow doubled her forwards.
Guiding the gasping girl’s noggin between her legs, Addison reached forwards with the both hands to get a firm hold of those emerald-sequined bottoms! With Piper yelling encouragement from the sidelines the redhead squeezed down with her thighs and hauled up with her arms! Lyra felt the silk-covered-steel of Allison’s legs squeezing her skull, but this was nothing compared to the blinding-white hot agony as her togs sawed into her center thanks to the expertly-applied wedgie!
Both partners had already slipped into the ring, Harriet making a beeline for the pair only to be intercepted by a running tackle form Sexton. The two ladies landed in a heap of limbs and hair, and rolled over each other, slipping under the bottom rope and splatting onto the ringside matting. Allison watched this all happen then turned back to the fancy-dressed brunette wailing in her clutches.
“Looks like syphilitic bytch number two isn’t coming to save you!” she crowed, giving an extra hard tug until the skimpy material started to make a ripping noise.
Down below Lyra was feeling every bit of it, but she was also aware of the pitfalls of this hold, as proved when one of her hands reached up blindly behind her own head, fumbled for a second, and then…
“YEOWWW!” Allison released the wedgie and frantically set about prying the brunette’s hands away from her crotch.
With the sudden, blessed relief in her own nethers, Faulk dropped to her knees, although with her head still squeezed between the Mean Girl’s legs. The two fought for at least twenty seconds, one blindly reaching up and clawing at tender flesh, the other crushing down and scrabbling at her wrists.
The deadlock was punctuated by the sound of a skull bouncing off a ringpost. Sure enough, Harriet Larkin played a little percussion with Piper’s head and then let her collapse to the floor, scrambling back up into the ring and charging across with one arm outstretched. The Running Clothesline THWUMPED into Addison’s collarbone and sent her sprawling down, Lyra being sent tumbling alongside her.
But while the brunette was left on the mat to catch her breath and re-adjust those treacherous togs, it didn’t look like Harriet was offering Addison any such opportunity. Hair-hauling the redhead to her feet, Larkin thumped a heartless kick between her legs and then reached down as she slumped forwards. It was the work of an instant to capture Allison’s arms and tuck her head before the Hollow Girl dropped sharply to her back.
FALLS THE SHADOW www.youtube.com/watch?v=uyvtF48BHjA
Face driven into the canvas-covered plywood, Allison Addison slumped onto her front and stayed there while Larkin scrambled to her feet.
“Get out of the ring Larkin!” Merle yelled, getting no response as the redhead chose to talk to her partner.
“Lyra? Babe?” she called, earning a groan from the hurting Aussie. “I know you’re tired, but I need you. Things fall apart. The centre cannot hold.”
Faulk glanced up then nodded, one hand still rubbing at her readjusted togs. She gingerly stepped over towards the nearest corner, taking a slightly circuitous route so she could launch a quick kick into Addison’s ribs just as the Mean Girl rolled out of the ring. Then Lyra was up to the top rope before she swiftly transferred to her ivory-skinned partner’s shoulders.
Right on cue, Piper Sexton chose to make her return to the ring. She scrambled woozily under the bottom rope and to her feet, coming to a halt when confronted by the towering figure cast by her opponents.
“What the F” managed to escape her lips before Lyra dove off her perch, hooking mid-flight around the blonde’s neck and tucking her knees up.
The elevated Lungblower was a devastatingly effective mood in its own right, but unfortunately for Piper, it seemed that the new girls weren’t quite finished. As Faulk hung on tight to her neck, Harriet took a step back followed by two quick strides forwards before throwing herself into a Senton which smacked across Sexton’s back and crushed her tits even further into Lyra’s knees.
MERE ANARCHY www.youtube.com/watch?v=88QxPmnOc_k (@0:36)
Piper spasmed out of the devastating collusion like a fish on dry land, coming to rest on her side. Lyra almost tenderly rolled her onto her back and pressed her whole body down on top, Merle dropping to count…
ONE
TWO
THREE!
The referee gestured to the timekeeper and the bell rang out seconds later, heralding a win for FlC. Faulk didn’t move from her press though, looking down into Sexton’s closed eyes and murmuring something about how the semiconscious blonde clearly wasn’t the real Harley Quinn. Meanwhile Harriet looked pleased but also a little surprised as she came to clap Merle on the back.
“Thanks for letting us win even though she wasn’t the legal one!” she said brightly, turning away again.
Behind her Merle was still as a statue, face slowly reddening. After a few seconds he just stormed over to the ropes and stepped out of the ring, rubbing his eyes on his sleeve as he left the stage. In the ring, Larkin pulled her partner back upright and planted a kiss on her lips, which lingered far longer when Lyra reached up and tugged the redhead’s face down into her own. Up until that point the audience hadn’t really known how to react but now they all joined in cheers, responding as usual to any sort of tawdry display.
Eventually Lyra let go of her hair hold, although she bit down on Larkin’s bottom lip and streeeetched it out a little with her teeth before letting go entirely. Harriet glanced around, but by now they were alone in the ring, the PTT girls having slipped away to lick their wounds. Still Harriet raised Lyra’s hand and the two both bent into a theatrical curtsy. The crowd rained down cheers and boos in equal measure as they made their way out of the ring and up the ramp still holding hands.